As Tim sat on his bed meditating, he couldn't stop his mind from going back to what was probably the most joyous moment of his life.

Flashback

A 13 year old Timmy stood under a streetlight waiting for Tootie to show up. He had sent her a note saying he had something very important to tell her. After about 2 minutes of waiting, Tootie walked up to him, not smothering him in a hug or planting several kisses on him. She had mellowed out over the past year, and even became a good friend of Timmy's.

"You wanted to talk Timmy?"

"Yeah Tootie, I've got something I have to get off my chest."

Tootie was nervous, was this the end of their friendship? She didn't have to wait long for the answer.

"Tootie…I…"

"Oh come on Timmy, you know you can tell me anything." she said smiling

"I love you Tootie."

With that one simple statement, Tootie finally felt a great weight lifted off of her shoulders. Her knees felt like jelly, and she was short of breath. She had to know if he was for real, or if he was just screwing with her.

"Do you honestly love me Timmy, because if this is a joke…"

"I'm telling the truth Tootie, it finally sank in that you were the only one that ever gave a damn about me. I gave up on Trixie long ago, but I wanted to make sure that you still felt the same way about me."

"Timmy, you know I'll always love you. And it's about damn time you got it through that thick skull of yours that I genuinely care for you!" She shouted laughing. Timmy just smiled and shrugged his shoulders. Tootie leaned in and kissed him, and Timmy returned it in kind. They stood there for several minutes just kissing and caressing one another. Timmy pulled away first and gazed deep into her violet eyes (No longer hindered by her diva style glasses).

"Will you be my girlfriend Tiffany?"

Tootie was amazed that he knew her real first name, but didn't hesitate to answer "Yes, but we can make it official when my parents and I return from San Diego next week. This is my dad's only week of vacation from his new job, so we are going down and seeing the sites. I promise you we will make our relationship public once I get back." She kissed him again, and walked home on a cloud, as did Timmy.

End Flashback

Tim couldn't help but smile at the memory of that glorious summer evening. It was the happiest he had ever been. A.J. and Chester didn't know, but were highly suspicious of why Timmy was so happy all of a sudden. But of course, as the old adage goes: "What goes up, must come down". So it was with his happiness.

Flashback 6 days later

Timmy was anxious for Tootie and her family to return from San Diego, mostly so he could repay all the time wasted avoiding and being down right nasty to her with plenty of kisses and hugs. He had tried to call her hotel room, but didn't get a response, so he decided that her and her parents were probably out to dinner and that T.V. would provide a decent distraction until she called back.

Timmy was flipping through the channels trying to find something decent to watch when he came across the PNN nightly news recap. Normally it wouldn't have caught his attention, but he wanted to see if they were running the scores for any baseball games yet.

What he saw shocked him to his very core. There had been an explosion at a hotel in San Diego and many people had died. Timmy prayed that it wasn't the hotel Tootie was staying at. When the commentators said the name of the hotel, Timmy collapsed. Unable even to shed tears or even speak, he watched as the names of the dead scrolled past the screen, and his worst nightmare was confirmed. Tootie, her mother Nicky and her father Victor were among the confirmed dead.

That was followed by a heartbroken scream tearing from his throat, and his parents rushing upstairs to see what was wrong. After watching the report again, and seeing the names scroll past, his dad knelt beside him and wrapped him in a hug as his mom stood there with tears running down her cheeks. His parents hugged him tightly and tried to reassure him that he would be ok, but somewhere in his heart Timmy knew he would never be all right ever again.

There was barely enough of them to identify, let alone bury, which almost sent Timmy over the edge. The funeral was toned down, but thankfully Vicky had the class not to show up. She did call Timmy and said that she was glad to be rid of her parents and the "Little Bitch". Timmy went ballistic and called her every name he could think of, even going as far as threatening to kill Vicky if she ever showed her face in Dimmsdale ever again. He was close to suicide many times, but by the grace of God he managed to keep his sanity.

End Flashback

Of course what Timmy had forgotten was how his fairy god parents Cosmo and Wanda had helped him grieve and maintain his sanity. Going as far as poofing him to Fairy World when he was suicidal. Even Jorgen von Strangle, the toughest Fairy in the universe could do nothing to pull Timmy out.

All he could do was to watch over him when he got poofed to Fairy World and try to talk to him (which took everyone by surprise because it was widely assumed that Jorgen didn't even know the word "compassion"). It took a couple of months, but slowly Timmy came out of his depression, dedicating himself to school and his friends. He had even buried the hatchet with Trixie and the other popular kids during their Sophomore year in high school.

The explosion had been ruled accidental, which didn't help make it easier to swallow. The fact that she would not have felt any pain was a slight consolation to Tim, but still knowing that she didn't even see it coming, and woke up in heaven killed him inside. He wondered if her last thoughts on this planet were of him and their future. He felt her everywhere he went to this day, watching over him smiling and probably commenting on how much of a hunk he had become. That brought a small smile to his face, knowing she was probably lusting over him with that shy look she would get and giggling her head off.

Though he never really had a steady girlfriend (he dated occasionally, even taking Veronica to a couple of dances, including the Prom), he remained focused and showed the intelligence that Cosmo, Wanda, and even A.J. knew he had. Tim shook himself out of his trance and looked around the room.

Why the hell do I always do that to myself? Tootie is dead, and though I will always feel her love in my heart, nothing can ever bring her back! It's been seventeen fucking years for God's sake and I still cannot shake her memory! He thought solemnly.

He had sought counseling, though it didn't help. Any little thing reminded him of her. When he was sent back in time to stop Vicky, he so badly wanted to see her one last time, if even for a shred of closure and to smack his ten year old self upside the head to see Tootie in a different light. He couldn't of course, or it would have altered history, but was that so wrong?

He let out a long sigh as he continued to torture himself over losing Tootie. She was always there for me, always loving, always supportive and I wasted so much time fearing her. What I wouldn't give to see her one last time and tell her once more that I'm still sorry for all that wasted time. Then, maybe I can move on and at least try to be happy for once in my life.

He turned his head up to the ceiling as tears flowed out his eyes. "I know your up there watching over me my love. I hope in some way I have made you proud. I keep you in my heart always. My hope is that you are the one who meets me at the pearly gates when I die. I still love you Tootie, always and forever." He said, letting his head bow. He wiped away the tears (though afterward he always assumed he was cried out, taken by surprise every time he had fresh tears to shed) and went back to his meditation, trying to block out more Tootie-related thoughts for the sake of his sanity and of the mission at hand…easier said then done.

He could feel his energy draining with every second that he thought about her. So he decided to drift off to sleep, praying that she would not haunt his dreams, knowing full well that she would. He stretched out and tucked his hands behind his head, his thoughts swimming with what if. The dreams came, and as always they were of the two of them. The most prominent one was of the night he told her he loved her. The warm summer's breeze blowing her hair softly, the way her eyes shone as he spoke, the feel of her hug and of his lips pressed against hers. It was here that he was the most happy, really the only time he was happy.

He awoke with a small smile on his face and a new feeling of purpose. "I'm going to take out Athena for you my love. Make the world a better place even though your gone." He whispered in the darkness, feeling as if she were smiling down and pushing him towards that goal.

However, what Tim didn't know was that Veronica had heard every word, and had tears in her eyes. Poor Tim, he can't let her go no matter how hard he tries. I hope he finds peace somehow, he deserves it more then anyone else. she thought as she made her way back to her opulent quarters. I only wish I could've helped him more when we were teens.

To Be Continued…

Author's Notes: So sorry for the emotional chapter everyone. I promise that I will get back to not only the interrogation of Remy, but to also the plotting of Gen. Verdant and Queen Athena in the next chapter. As it stands, thank you to everyone for reading and to those few who reviewed and I hope you have a great Thanksgiving!