Not Gonna Wait For You Forever
Chapter Five: You're Perfect and I'm Nobody
"I do not want to go home." Alex says plainly, letting Marco grab her hand.
"You shouldn't have to feel like that." Paige says grabbing her other hand.
"It's fine. I'm okay." She says. No one pushes it because she obviously is done talking about it.
"Are you two done procreating back there?" Alex says, moving very little to see Craig and Ellie in the back. Ellie jokingly slaps her shoulder.
"We were not procreating gosh." She says.
"The movies have been over for like, an hour I think it's time to go." Marco says. None of them move.
"I need to tell you something Marco before I forget because I don't want you to find out any other way. Dylan's back for the summer." Paige says, not sitting up to face him.
"I'll be upset when I have some more energy." He says. They all know that he won't even remember this conversation.
"Hey, can you kids please leave, we're trying to close up here." An elderly man says tapping on their window.
"Oh yeah, sorry sir we just kind of lost track of time." Paige says dropping Alex's hand and climbing to the driver's seat. Alex climbs into the passengers seat and Marco curls up already asleep. Ellie and Craig fall asleep in each other's embrace leaving Alex to keep Paige alert while driving.
"When did your parent's divorce?" Paige asks keeping her eyes on the road.
"Uh, when I was like four." She says.
"Do you remember them together?" Paige asks yawning.
"Yeah I do. When did your parent's divorce?" Alex asks staring intensely at the girl next to her.
"When I was seven. That was the saddest day of my life." She says. Paige can see her reliving that day. Alex had seen her talk vaguely about it before, but she never seemed this upset about it. She didn't want to press her too much more.
"Are you okay sweetie?" Alex asks.
"Yeah, fine." She says, finally looking at Alex with a smile.
"Any chance that I could stay over tonight." Alex asks.
"No sorry." Paige says without a second's thought, Alex is taken aback.
"Why not?" She asks.
"Mom said no more company for awhile. Sorry." Paige says.
"Alright." Alex says sliding down in her seat some. She didn't want to go home to her mom. To Chad. Paige's house was perfect. Paige's family was perfect. Paige was perfect. She stares at her for a moment and then the thought enters her mind.
"You're perfect, and I'm nobody." She thinks to herself.
They drop Craig and Ellie of at her house and he drives home from there. Then they drop Marco off. They sit in the car for awhile. Alex just keeps thinking of her house. She knows that every second brings her closer to that place. She just wants to escape it, if even for a moment.
"Paige can't you just talk your mom into it please?" She says, frustrated that Paige won't let her stay.
"No I'm sorry she doesn't bend the rules for anyone." Paige says.
"Well, can I stay and then leave before she gets up?" Alex says in desperation.
"No I'm sorry Alex maybe some other time." She says adamantly.
"Fine just take me to my house." Alex says sliding down in her seat and closing her eyes. She didn't care if Paige fell asleep anymore, in fact she sort of wished that she would run off the road and hit a tree. She'd never have to return to her house then.
"I'll talk to you tomorrow." Alex says quietly as she gets out and slams her door hard.
Paige drives home with little emotion on her face. She turns the radio up trying to drown out the thought in her head. Not much could do that. She felt really bad for Alex. Her house was pretty much hell on earth, and she didn't even know the whole story. Chad is always knocking her mom around and sometimes hits Alex, though she'd never admit that. She realizes that she is almost on her road and turns off. She'll take the long way.
She goes past Jimmy's house and thinks of all that he's been through. She really admires him for his strength. Not only was he shot and put in a wheelchair, but he survived a relationship with Hazel. It takes a strong person to do that. She knew that Jimmy was the kind of guy that if she ever needed something would be there for her. He always had a hand for her to hold.
She goes by Ellie's house and smiles a sad smile. No one should have to go through everything that she goes through. She remembers how much they used to hate each other, and then the exact moment when she realized that she needed to help her. Her former hatred had truly stemmed from jealousy. Paige was expected to be a shallow, hot, bitch and nothing more. But Ellie, she didn't care. She could be who she wanted. She was so deep and beautiful and had so much talent. Paige thought that she had more strength than anyone, that she didn't feel anything. The moment that she saw the blood dripping into the sink she realized that nothing is ever as it seems. She had been through so much with that girl and she would go through hell and back for her.
Soon she's driving past Craig's house. She remembers his first day how nervous he was. He still had some subtle confidence to him that she had always found inviting. His warm embrace always felt safe to her and she knew that it was always open. Craig is the kind of guy that she has always felt close to even when she is far away from him. They can go months without talking and still feel like they are best friends. They just have this bond, this understanding. They can pick up right where they left off to, as though they had been hanging out everyday. Whether it was a reassuring smile, a word of wisdom, or the man's strong embrace Craig always had something to make her day.
She drive's past Ashley Kerwin's old house and feels a sense of loss. They had a rocky relationship without question, but she still found herself thinking about her daily. While Ash was an emotional basket case with a few issues, she would usually end up seeing past herself and coming to the rescue. I hope that she is finally happy with Alistair all the way in London. And boy do I hope that he has the energy to keep up with her.
She realizes that she has reached the road that she has to turn on and she sighs. She goes down her long road still thinking of all her friends. It has been a crazy four year's but she wasn't ready for it to end. Where does the time go? It's like when you aren't looking all of a sudden your life is starting. She turns into her drive way and slowly gets out of the van. She takes her time walking to the door. And as she opens it and quietly shuts it, she closes her eyes and leans against it. She is relieved by the silence that greets her. Then before she has a chance to venture to her room, her hopes are crushed.
The booming voice of her father echoes through the house. A scream from her mother is the response. It's Friday. The day that her dad has come back for the millionth time. Just to ruin their lives, take some money to support his habits and leave them broken and torn. She finds it suddenly hard to remember her love for him during times like this. Alex and everyone else for that matter thinks that her life is perfect. They have no idea. She can't let them see this. She is the strong one now, she is the perfect one with the perfect family. Everything is just fine…