1A/N: And so it begins...or is it so it begins to end. The darkness will not allow what it owns to be free for very long and darkness runs deep even when it is hidden away.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans, but hey, I think we all knew that already

Trying To Do the Right Thing

Chapter 12

By: Finalitylife

Robin P.O.V:

The battle...well the battle ended, and I still feel a slight chill up my spine at the thought of it. Raven...Raven ended a difficult battle. For all of Dr. Light's stupidity in planning and enacting crimes, he always made up for it with incredible technology that did well to combat each of the Titan's strengths. However, there was always one thing he count never counter and that was Raven...if you can even call that form of her Raven. I remember the first time I had seen it, the very first battle against Dr. Light. Her eyes glowing burning red, her form darkening into an endless black, those whipping tendrils of dark energy, and most of all, the malicious and distorted sound of Raven's voice as she pulled Dr. Light into oblivion. His screams still echo in the darkest corners of my mind, places where I try to forget things, his high pitched shrieks that could only have been born of pure terror. I also remember the look on Raven's face as she gazed down at Dr. Light's trembling, curled up form, when her beautiful eyes had regained their normal color. It too was one of fear, a fear that rarely found its way into the stoic young woman.

To this day, I have no idea what happened during that battle and a small part of me is glad I have no idea because that means there is no answer to the question that still haunts me on those stormy, dark nights...what possibly did Dr. Light see to turn him into a shaking, muttering, broken man. It took over a year before he appeared again and it was obvious he was not the same. He is, to say the least unhinged, and it is clear the mere sight of Raven either caused psychotic rage or paralyzing fear in the once dangerous criminal. His grip on sanity is not a grip at all, but rather a few fingers barely hanging on to the cliff that is stability.

I never asked Raven what happened that one time, never questioned what she had done, allowed her to drift back to her shadows to be left alone. Even when Starfire asked over and over again, I denied her requests to go talk to Raven because I knew that like me, she would find answers to her problems alone. Of course, another reason was that I don't think I was ready to venture into the realm that was Raven, was not ready to see what lied beyond that ever present cloak and beautiful amethyst eyes.

I first met Raven about two years ago, when a small, lonely little girl wrapped ever tightly in a dark cloak came to a scrawny, idealistic sidekick with the idea of forming a young group of superheroes. I readily agreed to this idea, knowing it was my chance to proof myself, to escape the arguments and tension that had grown far too great between me and Bruce, things that had now been thankfully settled. The first time I met Raven, I senses something almost foreboding about her, something that told me to run away almost, but one look into those eyes of hers told me she was sincere, she was a worthy person to fight along side with. The rest is history but tonight, that foreboding sense has returned to me...something...something is on the horizon. It is just not Raven that I get the feelings from, it is the bright moon, the flowing wind, and something I can't put my foot on. The last time I felt a feeling so strongly, I was an apprentice a day later.

I watched Dr. Light hand himself over quietly after only a flash of Raven's form from the first battle. Again I saw the raw terror in his eyes. Raven did not celebrate a victory, did not comment to any of us, but rather defensively said no to going out for a bite to eat, muttered something about wanting to get home before tomorrow, and flew off to our home which was so very close. I think I was the only one able to see it though, the only one capable of reading the small bits of emotion Raven let herself show in front of others when she didn't want to reveal anything. There was the smallest bit of fear in her eyes as she fled home. I had seen that fear once before and had neglected to pursue it, rather left Raven to its icy touch. However it has returned and this time...I think this time I am ready to confront Raven and along with that sense of terrible foreboding I feel, I get the feeling that nothing will ever be the same when I finally find out what could cause Raven to have that hidden fear in her eyes once more.

It is already the next morning, sleep had not come at all to me, and I now find myself pacing back and forth in the kitchen. I'm deeply tired but my mind continues to frantically analyze what had occurred, what Raven had said, what all these feelings I'm getting could mean. Nothing seemed to make sense. My mind was chaotic yet strangely, I had one reoccurring image in my head that was peaceful nonetheless. It was the picture of a purple haired young woman lying on the beach with her intoxicating scent and such a wonderfully precious smile on her face. I found myself stopping and blinking for a few seconds at my words. Wonderfully precious? What the hell was that. Am I turning into Starfire all of a sudden? I shook the thoughts, cobwebs, and weariness from my head and decided to make myself some coffee. Eventually I knew I would go straight to the source of all of this, but I would give Raven just a little more time. I would not rush this even though I would have my answers this time.

Suddenly, I heard the arguing of two of my teammates along with the gentle voice of our resident alien princess. Cyborg and Beast Boy rushed it clammering about what to eat as Starfire floated behind them trying to understand some of the various insults that flew by. I couldn't help but smile as Cyborg said a particularly colorful one and the way Starfire cocked her head to one side as she tried to understand it, her large green eyes with a look of intense concentration yet confusion, it was simply adorable. It seemed like it took several minutes before anyone even noticed my presence around the kitchen. Beast Boy was the first and his eyes widening with the glint of mischief upon him seeing me told me something was up.

"Yo Rob, youarenotgonnabelievewhatIfoundoutlastniteboutRaeItsincredibleitsgonnabesomuchfun!"

I stared at the green shapeshifter, feeling my brain throb at the loudness and speed at which he spoke, trying to do my best to comprehend it in my sleep deprived mind.

"Mind repeating that slower Beast Boy. I had a pretty long night." His body seemed to be shaking ever so slightly in excitement which really got me worried. A Beast Boy this excited was either going to do something very stupid, very destructive, or very detrimental to the well being of a member of the tower which was usually stupid and destructive. He seemed to take a few deep breaths, doing his best to calm down which actually impressed me as he usually repeated the same thing over and over again at speeds that weren't understandable. Sometimes I would have to resort to Cyborg replaying a recording back at slower speeds to finally make some sense of the rambling.

"Rob, this is incredible new. Remember when Raven said she wanted to get home before tomorrow, like tomorrow was something important, well I found out what it is. You see I had a hunch and went all secret spy and stuff and hacked into some of your old files..." I held up my hand to stop him giving him a curious eye.

"Let me get this straight...you, Beast Boy, had a hunch, an idea, and then was capable of hacking into my files? Something seems a little strange here." I glanced over at Cyborg who seeing my attention move toward him decided to nonchalantly whistle a tune as he now focused intently on his cooking. I looked back at Beast Boy who had a sheepish grin on his face.

"Alright, it doesn't matter how I came across this info, it just matters that I did. Today is our resident empaths 18th birthday!" His voice rose in pitch as he screeched out his world moving news and even I found myself shocked by it. So today was Raven's birthday. Why had she been so concerned about it as she appeared to have been? It didn't make a whole lot of sense. I've heard of people not being a big fan of their birthdays but I knew she had been afraid last night and nobody was afraid of their birthday's...well with the exception of some women when they turn 40. Starfire's giggling broke my thoughts as she exclaimed how wonderful it would be to celebrate Raven's birthday. I'm sure in Starfire's mind this was an opportunity for her to show Raven how much she still cared for her and still how sorry she was about how she acted. Cyborg and Beast Boy probably just saw it as an opportunity to cheer Raven up after what they had heard about on the beach and the seemingly bad mood she had been in since then. As they all started talking about all their great ideas for the party, all I thought about was how this couldn't possibly turn out good for anyone...most especially Raven. There must have been a reason no one knew it was her birthday, why she hadn't told anyone. I must have had it on my original files those two years ago when we formed the Titans, probably some forgotten record I had her fill out in my process of being thorough. Who knows but the bottom line was that she didn't want any of us to know. Did it bring back bad memories for her? Did something tragic happen years ago on her birthday? I knew nothing of her parents but maybe something happened to them on her birthday...just like for me, December 15 would always be the most painful, most hated day of the year, the day I lost my parents to cruel fate.

Again Starfire pulled me from my thoughts as she appeared in front of me, her hands clasped together in front of her with the fullest of smiles on her face.

"Oh shall the celebration of Raven's birth not be glorious Robin." I gave her a weak smile, tried to look enthusiastic but failed miserable, that fact evident by the slight fall in her smile. It seemed Beast Boy and Cyborg took notice of it too.

"What's wrong man, you don't like parties or something?" came Cyborg's response.

"Its not that Cy, its just do you really think Raven wants to celebrate her birthday. You know she hates any type of party and if she really wanted to celebrate her birthday then she would have told us." All there grins faltered seeing that I wasn't on the same page as they were but it was Cyborg who was the first to respond.

"Come on man. Nothing big, just us, some food, some music, and a pinata that looks like Beast Boy. You can't possibly tell me Raven would not absolutely love that." Beast hastily replied.

"Yeah man, you can't tell me Raven would not..." It finally settled in what Cyborg had said and he turned toward his mechanical best friend.

"That's so not funny man." I couldn't help but laugh out loud at the scene along with Cyborg as Beast Boy did his best to seethe and Starfire did her best to figure out what a pinata was. I suddenly felt a wave of sleepiness hit me hard, reminding me that I never did get to my coffee, but something told me a few hours of sleep would be better.

"Alright guys. I need a little bit of sleep. Don't do anything for now until I'm back awake. We still need to discuss this. Give me three hours and then we'll figure out if a party really is a good idea." All three nodded as I slowly walked away toward my bed, too tired to see that mischievous grin once again cross the face of Beast Boy. More in my mind was thinking about how to stop this party idea and exactly what I would say when I went to talk to Raven. The latter was the most important thing in the world to me right now but I definitely wanted a clear head before I took that foreboding endeavor upon my shoulders.

I found myself waking up in my bed, feeling more comfortable than I had in a very long time, not wanting to move from my spot. I felt like I had slept for days but it had to have been less than three hours because my alarm I had set hadn't woken me up and that had been set for exactly three hours. I looked over at my clock, let the number settle in for a few seconds, registered in my sleepy brain exactly what I was looking at, and then shot up from my bed. I grabbed the clock, willing the numbers to change completely but only received the slight electronic chance of a 5 to a 6. It was 8:06 and it was P.M. How the hell was it 8 at night? I had went to sleep at 8:30 in the morning and my alarm should have awoke me at 11:30. What happened? I studied the clock for a few seconds before it finally dawned on me. The alarm was set for 11:30 P.M, not in the morning. I hadn't slept through my alarm, I had set the wrong time in the clock. How could I have been so stupid? I was supposed to talk to Raven today and...oh no, oh please no. I slowly reached for my communicator which just started to buzz quietly. I flipped it open to see Cyborg's face.

"Hey man. You've been sleeping all day. We couldn't get you to wake up for shit. Anyways, we decided to go ahead and set up a small surprise party for Raven so you need to get your butt down here in about 10 minutes or your going to miss it." I saw a green blur shoot past behind Cyborg saying something about getting the cake in place and I could feel my heart jump. Cyborg broke the communication a second later as he turned around yelling at Beast Boy to put something somewhere else. This was not good. A surprise party, Raven, this strange feeling I was having. Please, please don't let her blame me for this. I scurried around my dark room looking for the pieces of my uniform, getting as fast as I could to the main room. It was time to run damage control if things went bad.

When I arrived, I found the room dark. I suddenly felt two strong arms grab me and pull me off to the side. I was about to protest when Cyborg silenced me, and very quietly told me Raven was on her way in a few minutes. I felt my body stiffen at this news and I couldn't shake this numbing feeling in my limbs. A small part of me told me I was being ridiculous and was overreacting and another part kept reminding me of that fear in Raven's eyes. I didn't have much time to debate over this with myself as suddenly the lights flickered on and three very loud Titans yelled surprise. My eyes didn't adjust quick enough to clearly see Raven but a small scream and her form disappearing into black energy into the ground was enough to tell me she had been frightened by the yell. Not a good start. The three other Titans looked around in confusion before Raven suddenly appeared next to Beast Boy looking quite angry.

"Who told you it was my birthday? How did you know?" Beast Boy, under the piercing glare of Raven, shifted with nervousness and fear. This time, his tale of how he got the information clearly included Cyborg in it or more likely, implemented Cyborg with him. I could actually hear Beast Boy gulp as Raven continued to stare at him. It was Starfire's cheery voice who broke the silence.

"Please friend Raven, this party was all our ideas. We only wished to celebrate and have fun with one of our dearest friend's on her birthday. If we have offended you somehow, please no we are all sorry." I watched as Raven looked upon the smiling Tamaranian, and the angry girls face softened.

"You didn't offend me Starfire. Its just my birthday is not worth celebrating." Cyborg was the next to speak.

"Of course it is dark girl. Look at all the stuff we got you." He gestured toward a table towering with food, ice cream, cake, presents, and a few unidentifiable items that could only be Tamaranian in origin. I was impressed they had gathered all this in such a short amount of time. "We also got this." My eyes widened as he actually held up a pinata shaped exactly like Beast Boy. Where the hell did they get that on such short notice? Raven responded sternly.

"No Cyborg, there will be no party on this day. This is not a day to celebrate." Her words emphasized that she was doing her best to suppress her emotions, her anger, and many other things. I could almost see the waves of emotion radiating off of her. Of course, Beast Boy, always being the one who had no ability to read Raven, always took the situation one step to far. Who am I kidding, a fricking mile too far this time. He smiled playfully at Raven, giving her a playful nudge with his elbow.

"Come on Raven. If you stay and have fun with us, I'm sure Robin will be willing to give you your birthday spankings." Booom! A surge of black energy engulfed the table of stuff, absolutely destroying it. I watched the scene and was sure that I even saw the ground begin to crack. I turned abruptly back to Raven, not noticing the shocked looks on the Titan's faces only to find her cloak disappearing down the hallway. I immediately left the others behind, chasing after her, calling out her name. She ran for about two dozen more feet before stopping. I could see black energy spiraling out from her body, all the lights in the hallway already broken leaving the two of us in almost total darkness except for an emergency light farther down the hall. Her body was visibly trembling though I knew not to get to close because of her power. This was the most out of control I had seen her in months and I knew her emotions were on overload for probably a lot of reasons. I spoke her name as gently and soothing as possible. She didn't respond but I decided to talk anyway.

"I'm sorry about the party Raven. I told them it wasn't a good idea but they really wanted to do it. They only did it because they care and wanted to show you that." I saw the black tendrils of energy recede a little bit. "If you want to blame some one blame me. I should have done a better job making them understand that you didn't want to celebrate your birthday or have a party or..." I was cut off by her voice. It was low and cold, filled with tremendous anger, making me take a step back. It most definitely did not sound like Raven, though I had heard that voice from her mouth once.

"Is that all my feelings for you are Robin, some type of joke? Do you sit around and laugh away with Beast Boy and Cyborg when I'm not around about my confessions and desires for you? Do you!" I heard a wall crack at this yell but I did not back down.

"You know I would never do that to you Raven. You know I would never do anything like that to someone who means a lot to me." Her laugh was dark and echoed the hallway. I looked around in the dark hallway and it seemed that there was no beginning or no end, only this spot where me and Raven were. However, as soon as it all began, it stopped. All the dark energy pulled back into Raven abruptly and her body stopped shaking, in fact she didn't move at all. Only stood there like a statue. I took a few steps forward and still she didn't move. I cautiously stretched out a hand and gently placed it on her shoulder and let out a small yelp of pain when my hand was burned. I hadn't even touched her skin, only her cloaked shoulder, and somehow it burned.

"Raven...please tell me what's going on. Please tell me." There was no response. "I know something is going on. Something about this day, your birthday, something bad, I just know it. Please let me help you." She slowly turned around and I felt my breath get caught in my chest at the haunted look in her eyes.

"Robin..." Her soft, gentle voice was cut off by the blaring of the alarm and once again me and her were interrupted by it. This time however, I was not relieved by the interruption, but cursed it. It was time for the Titan's to protect the city. Our problems had to be put on hold for now for the good of the innocent, though maybe in my pursuit of the cities safety I was looking over the most innocent of them all.

There was no message on what the crime was only that it was in a factory in the Industrial district. The second we entered the place, my eyes were instantly drawn to all the machinery, all the moving parts, all the enormous gears. It reminded me so much of him, of fighting for my life. It was that moment that my eyes settled on the one person I truly had hoped was dead, was completely wiped from the face of this planet. The name I spoke came out filled with such anger, such hatred that Starfire gave me a look filled with fear as she stepped away from me.

"Slade!"

spiderbob: I think those episodes had good ideas but were missing so much when it came down to it, well except Birthmark. That was pretty damn good in itself. Well anyways, glad you like where I'm going and hoped you liked the first chapter. Probably plenty more bad things to come because...well would you expect anything else.

evilsangel: Yeah it was kind of mean not to at least give her that but did you really think things would go that smoothly. Troubled water ahead and I'm sure you'll like what I have planned.

BigBlackWoman: Yeah it is kinda obvious where I was going but glad your still enjoying it. I hope to have a somewhat original spin on it all but lets see where it goes.

Cherry Jade: You have like the best, most elaborate, and encouraging reviews. Thanks C.J. Always great to hear from you. Glad your excited about where I'm taking the story cause the path is actually starting to help me get my spark back for writing which I badly need. You just don't explode from the anticipation because whose gonna wanna clean that up. Well thanks for all the kind words and hope you enjoyed this chapter. Lots starting to build up and I think we all know what comes in the next chapter. Now that will be interesting.

Kashira Hibana: Thanks for all the reviews you've been given me. Its always nice to get reviews when your really not expecting them. Glad your enjoying all my stories and I'll do my best to get everything moving on my other current project which I know your dying to read but have some patience please. Its still being created.