1A/N: I wanted to get this out sooner but I got tied up in writing something else but here it is. I'm still not sure how I feel about this chapter but who knows. Thanks to everyone who reviewed as always. 7 reviews which is pretty much the most I've gotten for a chapter in awhile so makes me feel real good. Some interesting reviews too, including one about baring children and all. Though there are a few comments I probably should respond to. Logan X, never thought of that idea which your right, that would be cool. I'll have to see how it plays out into this. MyChemSweetie, I think your really overestimating the popularity of my writing to think I deserve a following but hey, that would be pretty cool, minions and all. jk. Cherry Jade, I have no intention of becoming a pro writer. Its more of a hobby of mine to kill time though maybe one day I'll try and write that elusive novel everyone eventually tries to do. Well that's it. 2 more reviews until 100. Will I make it? Find out in the next chapter which should be very soon.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans, but hey, I think we all knew that already

Trying To Do the Right Thing

Chapter 18

By: Finalitylife

Raven had returned to the tower upon seeing that explosion knowing her time was up, Slade had made good on his guarantee, her destiny would no longer sit in the shadows that the young woman dwelled in. Her friends were in grave danger, would surely die if she didn't get there soon, and that fear was fueling her fantastic pace to get back home.

She came in through the exact hole that Slade had formed in the side of the tower and instantly saw her fears being realized and with it, a long suppressed anger released. Her friends were littered around the room, each in a state of various consciousness and pain. However, what caused her demonic blood to boil and rise to the surface, what caused her dark power to increase ten fold, was the sight of Slade stealing away the final breathe of the man she loved. She could feel Robin's life slipping away into oblivion and for the first time in her existence, a small part of her in desperation, accepted the burning rage within. Slade never stood a chance, no one would have stood a chance. Her human side was pushed back into her mind and the monster within took control.

What happened next was very much a blurry haze to the young woman though she did understand one fact very well, if it was possible to kill Slade, she was going to do it in the most painful manner she could think of and nothing would satisfy the demon within until that desire was fulfilled. As she stared into the one human eye of Slade, seeing the pain within, a battle was being fought within between what she desired to do and what she knew she should do. She knew she should stop, knew she had already won, that Slade would leave now that she had returned, but she couldn't find the strength to stop herself from becoming the monster she was born to be.

As she felt the last of her will being pushed away, she heard Robin calling out to her, begging her to stop, telling her to come back to him. Her demonic side wanted to lash out at him, rip him to pieces just as she was trying to do to Slade, kill him for making her weak, for making her truly feel... truly feel human. As she stared at him pleading to her, everything started to clear up for her, and she remembered what she truly fought for, not for vengeance against Slade but rather to protect her friends, protect him, protect what was truly pure in her life. With a renewed strength, Raven fought against herself and in one final surge, one final scream of terrible anguish, she forced her dark side back into the recesses of her mental landscape. Always back in, never out, never a moment freedom from the gnawing teeth and claws of the great beast.

She felt her massive surge of energy leave her but knew the damage had already been done. She realized how easy it could have been for her to have killed Slade, hurt her friends. She felt complete shame and disgust at herself wash over her and this time when Robin called her name, all she wanted to do was get away.

That was when she saw her other teammates, their eyes locked in horror at what she had done, what she had almost done, and that was when she realized the terrible truth, she had become what she had tried never to become her entire life...she had become that monster to those that cared about her.. She knew they were afraid of her, knew that they would hate her for what she was, and in her panic, overwhelmed by her own fears, she moved to flee her home again so that she wouldn't have to endure their hate-filled words, their judgement and inevitably their rejection. However, she didn't even make it one step before a hand had grabbed hold of her and the owner of that hand's intention was completely clear to her as he pulled her into a warm embrace. He would not let her leave them again, would not let her leave him.

Raven couldn't help it but again felt tears begin to flow from her eyes because no matter how much she knew her friends hated her, no matter how much she hated herself, she couldn't help but feel safe in his arms, the only place she truly felt safe in for so very long. She didn't return the embrace but buried herself into his chest, crying because it felt so wonderful, crying because she knew it would soon all be lost to her. As she wished she could get lost forever in this moment, the one she loved begging her never to leave him, she knew what she needed to do. She needed to tell them the truth of what was to come, what she really was, and in doing so, forever losing her place by their side and in their hearts. Though for just one moment, she wanted to enjoy simply being Raven, only a woman in the arms of her beloved.

Starfire, Beast Boy, and Cyborg had finally gotten over their shock at what had transpired before them...Raven's return and her single handily defeating Slade along with the fear that had indeed felt at watching that strange demonstration of her power...and her cruelty. However, watching her now, seeing her so small and so vulnerable, they couldn't find any fear in their hearts toward the dark, young woman. Yet Starfire, watching the scene play out in front of her and despite her joy at seeing her friend Raven return to her home, couldn't help but feel the first break form within her loving heart.

Robin P.O.V.

She was back. She was back and we all had survived despite several injuries. How long I stood there holding her, I don't know. How long the other Titans stood there in silence watching us, I don't know that either. The feelings that were flowing through every fiber of my being at this moment, I don't know.

I very reluctantly pulled away from Raven after feeling the eyes of all the rest of the Titans refusing to break away, reminding me that I was still the leader and they were probably waiting for me to do something. I turned around to survey my team. Starfire looked fine, a little bit burnt, and for some reason, very sad. She was still holding up Beast Boy who seemed to be fighting the incredible pain he was in at the moment with the savagely broken arm of his. Cyborg seemed a little glitchy, though had a small smile on his face. I wanted to say something, but couldn't really think of anything as I stared at each of them. It was Raven who answered the need for something to be done.

She moved past me, heading directly toward Beast Boy and Starfire. Her shoulders were hunched ever so slightly from what was most likely exhaustion from her massive power use, her movements a tad bit tentative, probably still thinking of the way each of them had looked at her. She stopped right in front of them, her interest focusing on Beast Boy who spoke through gritted teeth, continuing to try and deal with the pain.

"Hey Raven. Thanks for coming back and saving all our butts." Raven's response was to raise her hand and the soft glow of her healing powers soon was seen, a look of relief suddenly on Beast Boy's face.

"I can ease the pain for now but the bone still needs to be set and a cast will have to be put on. I can only do so much." Her voice was quiet, unsure.

"That's okay Raven. I can deal with that. I'm just glad you're back." Starfire offered Raven a soft smile.

"Yes it is most wonderful to have you home Raven." For some reason, I almost could feel it from Raven that she didn't believe them. Cyborg was the next to chime in.

"Yeah dark girl. You have no idea what you put us through when you just left. Don't ever do that again." Raven did not give a response. "Alright BB. Lets get you patched up. Starfire, can you help get him there.?"

"Yes Cyborg. Anything to help." Cyborg walked ahead with Starfire helping Beast Boy to the infirmary. Right before she left, she turned back to give me one last look, and was gone. This left Raven and me alone in the battle torn room. Her back was till to me, me in the same spot where we had embraced. She began speaking in a low tone, her words very sad, very chilling.

"I have no idea what I put you through when I left but I do know what I will put you through now that I've returned and for that I am sorry beyond words." I was about to ask what she was talking about when I watched her start to fall over. Quicker than I thought I could move, I was there to catch her in my arms before she could hit the ground.

"Are you okay Raven?" She looked up at me, her eyes clearly tired, containing a slight emptiness to them and her words were even more empty than that.

"I'll never be okay Robin." I could think of no response to her sunken words.

Eventually, Raven found the energy to stand up again, dead set on going to do what she could to heal Beast Boy so that he would get better sooner. I wanted to argue with her, that she needed to rest, but I just knew arguing would not do any good. I followed her to the infirmary, watching her like a hawk just in case she was to fall again though it did not happen.

Every one turned to look at us as we walked in though I was certain they were all looking at Raven and not me. Raven stopped, huddling with herself under their gazes, again seeming completely uncertain about what to do.

"Hey Raven. I set the bone as best as I could. I think its time you work a little of that healing magic before a put the cast on." Raven nodded the tiniest bit and approached the three other Titans while I remained a few feet behind. Again the soft glow of Raven's healing power was seen and again a look of contentment formed on Beast Boy's face, a goofy smile of sorts.

"Ah yeah, that's the stuff. You're a miracle worker Raven." Her body visibly tensed up at these words but she did not stop healing Beast Boy. The room took on a strange silence as Raven went about her work, no one really sure what to say. No one wanted to bring up Raven's reason for leaving yet, no one wanted to bring up what happened with Slade, no one wanted to know truly what that was that defeated Slade so effortlessly, that which raged out from Raven. The silence would have been awkward had it not really been what everyone truly wanted at this moment.

The glow eventually faded away and Cyborg went to work putting on a cast on to Beast Boy's arm to ensure proper healing of whatever breaks and fractures remained. I watched as Raven, her task complete, seemed to drift slowly away from the rest of the Titans as well as myself, eventually claiming her own little spot practically on the other side of the room. The cast did not take long to put on Beast Boy as the infirmary at the tower was home to a lot of special medical tools and equipment that weren't seen almost anywhere else in the world and special casting molds happened to be one such thing. Cyborg eventually finished and I watched as Beast Boy, with a deep frown on his face, shifted a few of his fingers, the only part of his right arm really able to still move. I knew that feeling all too well.

The room continued to remain silent, Starfire shifting nervously on her feet every so often, Beast Boy continuing to fidget his fingers, tapping on the hard cast for whatever reason. Cyborg seemed to, like me, be shifting his eyes from one Titan to the other, studying them and then there was Raven who stood deathly silent by herself, her cloak covering her entire body though her hood was down. She really did look like she was off in her own little world though it was her voice that finally broke the silence.

"I know you all have many things you want to say to me right now but now is my time to speak to all of you. What I am going to tell you all I had hoped would never be known to any of you, that it would remain a forgotten past and a buried secret for all eternity. However, there is no possibility of running anymore and the very least I can do for you is being finally honest about what's going on."

We all stood there, all our eyes on Raven as she seemed to be gathering her thoughts...her feelings before speaking. I felt a strange nervousness wash over me as finally many of my greatest questions would be answered but I couldn't help but think that maybe, just maybe, I really didn't want to hear those answers.

"Imagine if all the darkness, all the hatred, all the evil within the grand space of the universe came together and somehow spawned life, gave birth to one creature who reveled in all that is unholy. This being would simply not be evil, but IS evil, its existence itself defining that which heroes fight against. This being would wield power beyond comprehension, all-knowing and unending, the dark lord of the demon hordes of existence, pure malevolence without equal." I can actually feel my blood turning cold within my veins, my mind wanting to reel away from these words. I can see Raven's hands shaking every so slightly as she speaks, this all being very difficult for her.

"So what does this all have to do Slade?" Cyborg is the one to ask the question, wanting to hear the impossible connection that is slowing making itself clear. Raven takes a deep breathe, looking over each of us before proceeding.

"The being I speak of in fact does exist. Long ago, a great battle was waged between powerful spell casters and holy men and women from dozens of dimensions against this single immortal being and his fiery army. In all the great battles, they never could find the power to destroy Him, and soon found themselves slowly running out of time and options. It was then that the greatest of them formulated a plan, that to defeat Him, they would seal him away in one of his conquered dimensions, a dark prison of his own making for all eternity. They would magically sever any gateways or connections to this dimension and the Great Beast would be locked away forever, unable to escape. It took a massive explosion of energy to accomplish this goal, killing all the defenders of the Light except one in the process but in the end, the enemy of all life was sealed away, with every intention to never be seen or heard from again.

However, this was not to be. Darkness always finds a way to creep back into the world and it was 18 years ago that a foolish mage from the dimension of Azarath made a terrible mistake and accidently recreated a connection to the dark dimension where He was imprisoned. It was a temporary and short-lived creation but stayed open just long enough for the monster to escape for a time, unable to completely leave as his dark energies had become too tied into his prison for complete separation but just long enough for him to succeed in his goal. It raped the daughter of the mage who freed it, leaving His future within her womb, an anchor for His return."

"Raven...is it not true...that you are from the dimension of Azarath...I believe that is what you told me when our bodies were switched during the Puppet Master experience." Starfire's voice is very hesitant and very scared sounding but that does not cause me to miss the important fact revealed by her...where Raven is from. Another dimension...that explains so much. Raven slowly nods her head to Starfire.

"Yes Star, I am from Azarath. It was where I was born and raised before I came to Earth two years ago. It was my home."

"Still Raven, you haven't explained how any of this is tied into you, Slade, and that weird mark on his mask." Again Cyborg asks the questions that I can't seem to say, despite them sitting right on my lips. Raven closed her eyes, again breathing deeply, but I did not miss the hint of fear in her eyes right before she closed them..

"Slade has become a messenger, a soldier, an emissary of the Great Beast that was imprisoned long ago. The mark that adorns his mask is called the Mark of Scath...it is the symbol of the beast. It was used by evil men who actually worshiped the monster, as a way to hide the true identity of their dark God. Slade has become a pawn in a grand plan, a great destiny set in motion 18 years ago when the beast was freed for a time. It was Slade's purpose to place ancient symbols on the portal that will free the beast, it is his purpose to aide in successfully opening the portal, finally freeing that which seeks to destroy all...freeing it right into this dimension." Every gasps but me as I was slowly myself piecing together all this as she spoke. There was just one more thing she hadn't said yet, something I suspected to be true, and truly, truly did not want to be true, but no amount of wishing can stop that which is reality.

"Well why don't we just find this portal and destroy it. No more portal, no more problem. Its just that easy right?" Beast Boy looks around at everyone, the small smile on his face quickly fading. "Right?" My eyes leave Beast Boy and return to Raven who is shaking more now and is struggling to speak.

"The portal...it is not an object but rather a living being...the demon seed planted in that poor woman on Azarath 18 years ago. It is this cursed being, born of the most heinous of acts, with the dark demon blood of the Great Beast flowing through her veins, that since her birth, has had the inescapable destiny of bringing death to everything that has ever drawn breathe."

"So we would have to kill this portal to stop all this? I don't want to be killing anything but I guess one evil being can be sacrificed to save everything right?" My anger erupts at Cyborg as his blind stupidity.

"Shut up you idiot! Are you too stupid to realize what she's saying to us! She's the portal!" Cyborg's one eye goes completely wide, his skin a little bit paler.

"That's not possible. Raven's not evil."

"He's right Cyborg. I am the cursed child that was born 18 years ago. I am the Daughter of Trigon, Bringer of nothing but death and destruction. I am His portal and...and because of me, you and billions others will all die." With these final words, Raven runs out of the room, the soft padding of her feet with the occasional exploding light bulb, echoing down the hallway away from us, though I know this time, she isn't going anywhere. As she said, there is nowhere left to run. I turn and look at each of my team members, my closest friends, my family. Each one is in a state of shock but Starfire manages to stutter out a few words.

"Trigon...he is...he is nothing but a bedtime tale on my planet to scare naughty children. He is only like your Boogeyman on Earth. He...he can not...he must not exist." There is raw terror in Starfire's eyes, one of her childhood fears being very much real and coming for all of us. I want to say something comforting but at this moment, nothing could be considered comforting, rather only bold faced lies. There was every reason to be scared and nothing I could say could deny that fact.

"Cyborg, keep an eye on Beast Boy and Starfire. I'm going to go talk to Raven." Cyborg does not acknowledge me, but rather only continues to stare off into nothing.

"Cyborg!" This time he hears me and jumps ever so slightly at the sudden volume in my voice.

"What...oh yeah...got it covered man." I can tell by the look on his face he has no idea what to do at this moment but all I need him to do is make sure the two "child-like" members of the team don't freak out. I hope he can keep them calm. I leave the infirmary, leaving Cyborg to his 'baby-sitting' and begin walking to Raven's room. I have no idea if that is where she went but I have a feeling that she retreated to the sanctuary of her room, hoping to hide away from all of us.

I walk a very slow pace as my mind is bogged down in information and realization. All that was revealed, all these terrible facts, how simply these world-shattering truths explain so many things about Raven. Her reclusive nature, the darkness that always seems to nip at her heels wherever she goes, her unusual appearance and her self-loathing that runs deeper than any scar. Raven truly did hate herself because of what she was, what she was born to do, and the terrible evil that made its claim as her father.

This was what Raven had carried around with her since the day she was born. This is what Raven had always feared, had brought about that sense of foreboding I felt from her the day I met her. This was the burning red eyes that pushed their way out from her kind soul when the anger became too much to contain. It was all so unbelievable yet as I realized before, it explained everything perfectly.

Raven...how could one person withstand the pressure of all of this in silence for so long and still be such a beautiful, wonderful, and warm person. Now that was truly an amazing thought. I smiled briefly at the thought because it was perhaps the most important one of them all. Because no matter the fact that Raven and this destiny did indeed scare us, no matter that her Father was some supreme, inter-dimensional monster hell bent on destroying everyone and everything that had ever existed, it was the real Raven, that all the Titans knew and loved, the one we had fought beside for two years, lived beside and smiled beside, that we would without hesitation, fight for and, in my truest belief...die for.

I almost don't realize that I have arrived at Raven's room I am so deep into my thoughts, and almost walk past it. I stand in front of it, raising my hand to knock, but Raven already knows I am there.

"Go away Robin...please just go away." I lower my hand, a little surprised at hearing her voice though it is in that same tone that causes my heart to stop. Her voice is just so damn empty.

"Raven...please I just want to talk. Just let me in for a few moments."

"No Robin. I don't want to hear about how much I scare you, how much you all hate me. Just go away."

"I'm not going to lie to you Raven, yeah we all are scared. What you told us, its frightening. But its not you we're scared of and none of us could ever hate you."

"I don't want to hear your lies. Everyone hates me when they know the truth, everyone wishes I never existed. I...I don't blame you Robin, I don't blame anyone. It was something I simply accepted as truth long ago. I was born to be a monster and I don't know why I've ever tried to be anything else."

"Damn it Raven, you are not a monster! I really don't care what anybody else did but we are your friends, we're your family damn it, and it doesn't matter what happens, we all love you and are not going to abandon you when you need us most." She does not respond right away and a glimmer of hope comes into existence that I am getting through to her.

"If you stand by me, you will die. If you abandon me, you will die. It simply no longer matters. I'm so sorry Robin, I never wanted this to happen but it was always inevitable." I can hear the deep, unrelenting pain and sorrow in her voice now and I am sure a few tears are coming from her eyes again. All the lights in the hallway explode behind me showering me in glass though I take absolutely no notice of it. I begin pounding on her door, my fist slamming into it again and again.

"Nothing is inevitable Raven! I don't care what they said your destiny is but when the time comes, we all will stand beside you and we will fight this. Do you hear me! Not you, not me, not any of us are going to die! Do you hear me!" I stand clenching my teeth and my fists, breathing deeply from my sudden exertion. Dents now exist in Raven's door from my pounding.

"You don't understand Robin. You may want to fight but you can not win. This is and always will be my destiny. You can not fight what is born into you, can not fight what is you. You can not fight who you are!" I am pushed back from the door by an unseen wind from inside Raven's room and slam back into the wall of the other side of the hallway. I impact hard and fall, slumping to the ground though I still respond to Raven's words.

"You may not be able to fight who you are, but this is not you Raven. You are not evil, you are not a monster, and you won't be able to keep me from doing everything I can to save you." The last words slip off lips as again I find the shadows of unconsciousness overtaking me.