Location: Office of Mr. Jacob Crisp in Albuquerque, NM
Time: August 9th, 2006 at 7:00 A.M. M.S.T.
Jake was sitting in his office going through the various birthday cards and gifts that had arrived for him yesterday. He figured more would be coming in later this afternoon in the mail. Yes it was his 23rd birthday today but Jake didn't feel to much excitement for it. Truthfully once one gets past their 21st birthday, all the excitement is pretty much gone. He was particularly down this birthday and the current card he was reading over explained why. It was a birthday greetings from Crystal but it lacked the usual fanfare and humor that came with her salutations. This one was more cold and to-the-point, this coldness punctuating the brutally chilling fact that their relationship was no more. He couldn't help but go over the events that happened a little over a month earlier that began this whole downward spiral in their relationship. It was just after the 4th of July, in fact the 6th of July, when he had made his final decision. After being cleared of any wrong doing at Camp Kidney those 11 years back and after seeing the joy that the camp and its campers brought to his little brother Nate, he vowed then and their that no one affiliated with his company would buy out that property. He had decided that Camp Kidney would remain. He had thought that this would please Crystal, that after all these years he had finally let go of his nasty grudge against the camp. Unfortunately however, instead of the grudge being completely removed, it only seemed to be reborn now in his love's eyes, his now former love. She flat-out rejected his decision as a weak moment of emotion and when Jake wouldn't back down from his decision, the tensions began. He never could understand why all of a sudden this piece of land was now so valuable to her. She never made a big deal about it in the past. In fact Jake often thought that she might have viewed him as over-zealous with his desire to acquire the Camp Kidney property. They had for the most part stopped talking entirely and that was due mostly to her failed attempts to go over his head. July having been such a prosperous month for the company, the board felt no need to pursue the issue any further. Why?...he kept asking himself. Why is it such a big deal to her now? What is she not telling me?
Secretary: Jacob sir, you have a call from your brother Nate on line 2.
Jake: (shakes the thoughts of the past from his mind) Thanks Liz. I'll take it now. (he then pressed the button for line 2) Hello Nate.
Nate: Good morning bro and happy 23rd birthday!!!
Jake could hear Nate's cabin mates in the background wishing him well as well, especially the steady stream of the word surprise that could only be coming from Clam. He understood from Nate that this Clam was really an artistic prodigy. He would much like to meet him in person sometime soon and find out if this is so.
Jake: Thank you Nate and thank all of you jelly beans.
Nate: This isn't the only surprise you'll be getting to day. We plan to get a little something together for you by lunchtime and then have it flown to you before the day is done.
Jake: Well that's very thoughtful and all but y'all don't need to trouble yourselves over me.
Lazlo: (having gotten the headset from Nate) Are you kidding Jacob sir. We can't just sit back and do nothing for your big day...not after all the things you have done for us.
Jake: Yes well Lazlo I mean all those improvement I made were...
Lazlo: I know, I know...solely for your brother and not Camp Kidney but don't you see...by helping to improve his experience here, you've improved the camping experience for one and all here.
Jake: True, but I've always viewed that as my thank you gift to y'all for showing my brother a good time their. Now I thank you for your enthusiastic greetings as always Lazlo...very refreshing to see such a pleasant attitude in a young person like you but I would like to speak with Nate now.
Lazlo: Of course Jake...just a sec.
Lazlo hands Nate the phone and as Nate continues to chat on the phone, Clam, Raj, and himself begin to walk from the scoutmaster's cabin and head toward the lake. It is there that they plan to meet with Dave and Ping-Pong to take some final shots for the special yearbook they were putting together just for Jake.
Location: Shores of Leaky Lake
Time: August 9th, 2006 at 8:15 A.M. M.S.T.
Nate had just gotten off the phone with his brother Jake and now was at the lake near the dock with his fellow jelly cabin bunkies. They started to head over to the dock to meet with Dave and Ping-Pong. The two loons have been photographing the other campers as they hammed it up on their water-skies.
Ping-Pong: Great shots so far Dave. This should make for a great album.
Dave: Yea just so long as a certain guinea pig doesn't try to hijack it like the last time.
Ping-Pong: Oh I'm sure Samson want try anything like that again but that doesn't mean he'll stop during everything he can to make sure he's pictured in it. (he points out to where Samson is now skiing barefoot with his left foot holding the tow rope)
Samson had actually proving himself to be a natural of sorts with water skiing, even the more extreme barefoot variety, but both Dave and Ping-Pong knew that this being Samson's first one-legged attempt, they knew nothing good could come of this.
Samson: (shouting toward the dock) Hey guys, are you getting this? This will make a great shot don't you think?
Then as feared, Samson lost balance and let go of the tow rope and went skimming over the surface of the lake to the beach on the west end of the lake.
Samson: (yelling and flailing about as he skimmed over the water) Oh Nertz!!! (he winded up smashing into the beach after that exclamation)
Ping-Pong: Did you get some shots of him skipping across the lake surface like a stone?
Dave: Oh...yeah. I think Nate's brother will love these.
Nate: He would've especially loved to see you wiping out yourself Dave. I still laugh when I think of that time.
Dave: (a little startled) oh hey Nate. You caught us a little off-guard. You sure do move quietly.
Ping-Pong: Well that or we were just so involved in our work that we couldn't hear you coming.
Nate: Well keep up the good work guys. I'm going to go make sure Samson's ok.
Lazlo: Yea that was quite a rough ride he took toward the beach over there.
Clam: Fuzzy torpedo.
Nate: We'll join back up with y'all shortly.
As they were heading toward the beach area, Edward and Chip and Skip were getting ready to try a stunt that they had been practicing on land. This was the first time they were doing it on the water. Both Chip and Skip would ski next to each other with Edward balanced on their shoulders. The act started off nicely but it was getting obvious that coordination was becoming an issue.
Chip: Hey Edward...stop flailing around so much up there.
Skip: Yea...your scaring off all our flies.
Edward: Well if you numb-skulls would keep synchronized with each other, I wouldn't end up flailing so much.
Well a little less than a couple of minutes in, Edward and the two dung beetles wiped out. These photographs were turning out to be a regular blooper reel. Dave knew that this wouldn't upset Nate since he felt that Jake would love to see funny outtakes like these. Then from Lumpus's fishing boat came an announcement made by Slinkman over a megaphone.
Slinkman: Attention campers. Please clear the water as our own Chef McMeusli performs a surprise stunt.
As he was making his announcement, the otters took Edward, Chip, and Skip back to the dock and then pulled a huge wooden ramp out into the middle of the lake. This ramp was a recent donation of Jake and so it was a great to have it photographed being used. For now it was being used by McMeusli for some surprise stunt.
Lumpus: Slinkman...remind me again why I'm doing this?
Slinkman: Well sir you did agree to let your boat be used for the water activity here in return for payment from our newly established activities fund.
Lumpus: Oh not that Slinkman...I meant why are we letting this crazed hippie use my boat for his stunt. What if he slips and those horns scratch up my deck.
Slinkman: Sir I don't think you have to worry. McMeusli has done this many times before.
McMeusli: Ok guys...I have my skies on tightly have the chute all set. Now all that is left is to get this tub going.
Lumpus: (grumbling) call my boat a tub will he.
Slinkman: Relax sir...it will be over soon let's just go.
With that, Lumpus revved up the engine and set out around the lake to gather speed. All of the campers had their eyes glued to McMeusli. Meanwhile on the nearby beach, Lazlo and Clam had just pulled Samson out of the sand and were holding him by his ankles in the air.
Samson: Thanks guys. Man that was one wild...
He was then abruptly dropped onto the beach as Lazlo and Clam rushed over to see the stunt unfolding. Raj followed not too far behind, after crawling out from under Samson who was dropped on him. Raj had done most of the digging to get him out.
Nate: Sorry bout that Samson. Those guys can have such a short attention span. Let's go see what all the fuss is about.
Samson: Ok...hey you're wearing your glasses today.
Nate: Yea...My eyes were itchy and dry this morning so I'm taking a break from em.
Samson: Say...hehe...we could be twins for a day. Our glasses do closely match and our fur is close to the same color.
Nate: Well I'd be honored to be your twin for the day. Well twin let's go see what goes on.
They got over just in time to see McMeusli approach the ramp. He ascended the ramp smoothly and kept climbing up into the sky as he left the ramp. He then jettisoned the skies from the slide-boots on his feet and let out from his backpack a glide chute. The phrase "Eat Smart, Eat Vegan" emboldened in all caps on the underside of the chute.
Edward: Oh for crying out loud. Boo...Boo...
McMeusli was about to yell down and chide the booing campers below when he realized that he was loosing control of his glide chute. A gust of wind was causing him to fly over the lake and into the forest beyond. He was able to bring the chute down without causing himself injury but he was stuck about 9 feet off the ground, his glide chute tangled in the tree tops above. All of the campers started heading toward the forest to make sure he was ok. The first one to the crash site was Edward and his bunkies Chip and Skip.
Edward: (menacing look now coming to his face) So you need some help down from the tree I see. Well...maybe we can do something about that. (he then climbed up on Chip and Skip shoulders but even on top of these two, he could only reach McMeusli's lower legs) Ah...perfect...now I shall see if my knot-tying skills are still superior. (he then removes the ski-booties and ties McMeusli's now bare feet together)
McMeusli: What do you think your doing Edward. Get me down from hear now.
Edward: I have to say that was quite a stunt you pulled back there. Didn't think you had it in you. I mean...Wow!!!...the lengths you will go to spread your crazed dietary messages. Well your crazed diet has always been a joke here so I just want to make sure you get a good laugh from it.
McMeusli: (eyes widened) No...you wouldn't dare...please Edward...don't tickle my feet...I beg you.
Without delay, Edward began tickling McMeusli with his feathery fingers, sending the poor goat into hysterics.
McMeusli: (giggling) Stop it...No more...This is cruel torture. Help Somebody!!!
Edward: Oh yea...this is cruel torture. And that slop you served us this morning wasn't. (continues torturing poor McMeusli)
When the jelly beans had arrived it was to find the other campers egging Edward on to continuing tickling McMeusli till he passed out.
Nate: Alright...Alright everyone. That's enough of that. Let's help get McMeusli down from there. But first...I hope you've been making some photos of this Dave. We probably want ever get a grin that big from McMeusli ever again.
Dave: Way ahead of you Nate. I already captured some good shots.
Nate: Good...then let's get him down from their shall we.
Lazlo, Clam, and Raj were able to get up high enough to free McMeusli from his chute and let him down safely to the ground where his ankles were then unbound and he leaned against the very tree he was just trapped in to catch his breath.
Nate: Well I hope you learned something from all this McMeusli.
Edward: Yea like the fact your food doesn't go over well with bean scouts.
Nate: I was going to say that I hoped you learned to be more careful with a stunt like that. This lake is not broad enough and the winds are too unpredictable for a glide chute stunt like that.
McMeusli: Well my life was sure passing in front of me when I was headed for the tree line. Glad that I reached the ground relatively safely. This is the first time I can say that I was tickle-tortured by the first responder to the scene instead of rescued.
Edward: Oh please...you were never in any real danger. You know I could have come up with far worse ways to take out my rage at your culinary creations on you.
McMeusli: Well I for one couldn't think of anything worse than what you did. I was afraid I was going to wet myself.
Lazlo: That was pretty mean Edward, maybe you should apologize to McMeusli.
Edward: Oh for...oh alright...I'm sorry Chef McMeusli.
McMeusli: Well...apology accepted but I will be requiring you to help me get down my glide chute from the tree and you can do kitchen duty the rest of this week to help make up for it.
Edward: (grumbling) fine...I'm just glad that I was able to take my dietary frustrations out on you for just a little while. As such, there should be no need in the future to do that again.
Dave: Well now that that is all settled, we really need to get the album together if we want to get it to your brother before the end of the day Nate.
Nate: Your right Dave. Everyone lets go make a scrapbook.
So they were able to go and put the scrapbook together and by noontime they had had it shipped off to New Mexico. Later that night in his luxury apartment, Jake was going over the album and enjoying very much all the joy that he had help to bring them. To think that not too long ago he wanted it all gone...for Camp Kidney to fade into non-existence. How would Nate ever forgive him if that had occurred. Oh he knew Nate would end up forgiving him if that had happened. It was his nature. But there was no way he would ever look at him the same way. This photo album had just been what Jake needed to get his mind off his own concerns about Crystal and why she had become so distance to him. Perhaps someday soon he would find out. Little did he know how stunning and potentially fatal the truth would end up being. Little did he know that these rag-tag campers he spent the last half-hour laughing at their antics would be the ones who in the not-so-distance future would save his life.