Love and Memories
Chapter 2: A Painful Parting
Author's Note: Ok I know there is a HUGE plot whole… you will be thinking, wait… how did Claire get to the beach? Where are the Others? What happened during this 'war'? And all I have to tell you is, I don't know, because it doesn't matter. The important things in the chapter (the main event), the why's and the how's aren't so important. Sorry. I know its lame and a writer's cop out but hey, its the best I can do. I really
Ben's Point of View:
It happened to fast. In a matter of seconds all my planning had been tossed aside and forgotten. Guns drawn, lives held on the tender line as fragile as dental floss. One wrong move and blood would have soaked into the ground. But both sides had already made many wrong moves.
I am going to bury the people I love and care for; there is no question in my mind.
I knew they would attack; after all they're filthy murdering savages. I foolishly understatement the scale of their attack, their ferocity and malice.
I trusted Jack and he betrayed me.
He betrayed himself.
Now I am staring down the barrels of ten guns.
One flicker of a finger and it's all over.
Then her voice shatters the silence. She screams at us, and wakes the sleeping infant in her arms. "Are you bloody daft?"
My eyes shift to her, Claire. I haven't seen her, this close, since she had the baby. Her eyes blaze with rage.
"Well answer me!" Her voice cracks with venom. Ita a funny thing, being yell at by a mother. I feel like my mom was screaming at me, demanding an answer. Eyes shift from side to side. My allies and my enemies, all have the same reaction.
"Um whom are you talking to?" Hurley asks. If the situation weren't this intense I would probably laugh.
Claire stomps her foot on the ground causing her child to cry, "All of you." Her eye bore deep into my skull.
Charlie rushes out of the crowd and to her side, he starts to berate her about leaving the camp, walking through the jungle and worst yet with Aaron. I'm assuming that's the kid's name. His reaction is out of fear and panic, not out of anger. His arms wrap around her and the wailing child, in feeble attempts to sooth both. A silent exchange, tender and loving amongst the rage. Other men might not want to show that level of affection in front of enemies or other people, because it might be considered a sign of weakness. But not Charlie. No. He kisses her forehead in hopes he could extinguish the fire burning in Claire's eyes.
It doesn't work.
Claire becomes a force of nature and storms over to Jack and I. She snaps at us, "We get it, you have a penis and stop all this foolishness and let us get back to our lives." Did Claire just use the word "penis" in a sentence? Oh crap am I blushing? I think Jack is.
Jack becomes flustered, "This has nothing to do with who the bigger man, Claire, it runs much deeper then that."
"Oh Bollocks Jack! You're willing to risk everyone's life in order to prove your right. Well you're not."
"Claire, they kidnapped you, they killed Charlie… YOU of all people want us to walk away from this?" Wait? What? We killed Charlie? Isn't he the guy who's standing three feet away from me? What the hell are they talking about?
The storm tossed oceans blue of her eyes crash into my soul as she studies me, considers my family and me. Her voice is a clear as a churchbells, "Yes, I expect you to drop it. If it means we all walk away safe and alive. Yes."
"But they…" Jack tries to argue, over Aaron's screams.
Claire silences with gesture from her hand, "I'm tired of burying people, Jack. Boone, Shannon, Libby, Anna Lucia and Mr. Eko. There's just been too much death."
"But they kidnapped us…" Jack tried to rationalize, he tried to use logic on Claire. We both know its not going to work.
"Yes and you seem relatively unharmed by the situation, you've got all your limbs and fingers. It's not like they hung YOU from a tree." Charlie scoffs as he rubs Claire's arms. He's taking the side of his woman, interesting. Two minutes ago, I was certain he was going to be the one who killed. But now that she showed up all his rage his gone and he's solely focused on tending to her, calming her, appeasing her and drying the sobbing child's eyes.
Wait what the hell did he say about getting hung by a tree? I glance over to Tom who seems equally confused by the statement.
She addresses anyone who will listen, "They took me, kidnapped me, drugged me and I have no idea what they did to me or Aaron." She touches her child's head. "They killed Charlie." She peers over her shoulder and for a moment is lost in a secret terror between to lovers. The way she's staring at Charlie, she honestly believes he was hurt, she almost lost him forever. It so tender and loving, I feel voyeuristic looking watching the interaction inches from my face. Charlie nods at her, confirming to her that he's still very much alive and everything is going to be all right. "If we can forgive the Others then so can you, Jack."
Sawyer huffs, "They beat the hell out of me on a regular basis!" Sawyer snapped it.
"Have you met you? You probably deserved it." Charlie rolls his eyes and shakes his head and his fingers run down Aaron's chubby little arms. He's always so deadpan in his delivery; I think if we had met under different circumstances we might have been friends.
Claire doesn't so much plead with Jack as much as she demands, "Let's go home. The cat's out of the bag, we know they're here; they know we're here. Maybe some other time, when the wounds aren't so fresh, we can try to create a new relationship. Tomorrow's a new day."
"Bloody hell, maybe they'll come over for tea. You'd have to bring the tea though." Charlie thought it over and looks at me, "Do you have any tea? Because that would be bloody marvelous."
Behind me Juliet lets out a large amount of air out of her lungs, much like a quiet laugh. Charlie's comment starts to defuse the situation. Even Sayid breaks his ever constant glare and smirks a little as he lowers his gun. Laughter, even if it is internal, creates a magnetic force between the guns and the ground as all of them start to lower.
"Do you really think they're going to let us leave, Claire?" Jack snaps harshly at her.
She glares at him and sighs. She turns to me. Her eyes, bluer then the ocean that crashes against the beach, her skin whiter then the sand. While I know she's anything but pure, at this moment she appears to angelic and divine. She speaks softly, so only I can hear and steps into point blank range of my gun. Unfazed by the dangers she's in. She states as if speaking the words aloud makes it real. "I don't know a lot of things, but I know some facts. I don't know what you did to me those months back, but I do know, Aaron appears healthy and you haven't come back for us. I know for a fact you aren't going to kill me. You aren't going to kill me because I'm a mother of a new born. If you kill me, you would be killing baby as well." She pauses for a second and hands Aaron over to Charlie. Her bulletproof vest now handed off to a drug addict. Not really the best choice for a father but I guess the pickings are slim. Her eyes never waver once they meet mine. She places her hand on my arm, carefully. "You're creepy and weird but you are not evil."
Maybe it's the soft contact of her hand on my skin or maybe it's the way the wind is blowing though her hair, either way she's innocence personified. I've read her file many times, I know she's been kicked around by fate and men. And yet here she is ready to forgive us. She's a good person.
She's too good.
A terrifying thought crashes into my brain.
She won't survive here.
There's only one option. One way to prove to everyone I'm not evil as she so sweetly suggested. I know how much Aaron will mean to our research but still, neither he nor his mother is worth the risk of losing both of them to the island.
For the first time during this encounter I speak, "Claire." She appears startled I know her name. "If there was a way for you and Aaron to leave the island, would you?"
Confusion furrows her brow. She opens her mouth but no sound comes out. No, the answer comes from the man holding her child. "She'll take it." Charlie states with certainty and authority.
"Charlie it isn't your decision." I remind him.
I watch as everything else disappears from Charlie's vision. He readjusts Aaron in his right arm and with his left arm he wraps it around Claire's waist. He studies her confusion, but his stare is steady. "Claire if there is a chance for you're to get off this hellhole you needs to take it."
She shakes her head and tries to twist out of his grip. "Charlie what are you saying?"
I add, "There's a boat." I can't hide my bitterness, "it was supposed to be for Jack, but he didn't follow the rules."
Jack's eyes grew wide and he's instantly disheartened, "There really was a boat?"
My ever-growing annoyance with Jack is put on hold as I tell the young mother. "There is only a very small window in which the boat can leave, if you leave now, you can make it. There will be an ocean liner ready to pick you up. From the ocean liner there is a flight waiting for you in Fiji to take you to LA."
Charlie starts to plead with her, "I live in LA. I'll give you everything, Claire. My flat, my money, my music. Just get on the boat. Please."
Her bottom lip starts to quiver and water slides down her cheek. "Charlie?"
"All I want is for you to be safe. If that means leaving me here then so be it." His voice shakes. "You have to think about what's best for Aaron." It's a dirty and cheep card for him to play but still its effective. He kisses her lightly on the lips and as they part Charlie whispers, "I love you, Claire, please do this for me."
She starts to cry, the effects are slowly playing out on her face. Her cheeks start to redden as her breathing becomes forced. She closes her eyes and considers her options. Charlie whispers her name one last time. When Claire opens her eyes she looks in my direction and nods.
I feel like someone is slowly twisting my organs as I say, "Say goodbye to your friends."
She turns back to the people she's called her friends and family for the past three months. She heaves a sob as she coughs out, "bye." She waves Aaron's tiny hand to the group. This is the first time I look out to the group of survivors, all sharing in the lovers' good byes. I guess Charlie and Claire represented more then just a cute couple to them. They represented hope, life and love. Eyes are cast downward, lips are bit, arms wrap around bodies.
I grab Claire's arm and start to drag her away… I really don't know how much more of this I can take. I pull her down towards the dock, not looking at her or her friends. Juliet's face is hard to read at this moment, I'm not sure if she's pleased, proud or pissed. I only stop when Hurley calls out, "Dude, let Charlie say goodbye." Charlie's eyes are inverted to the ground, emotional and scared. Hurley steps forward for his friend who seems unable to speak. "They got engaged a few days ago."
This is when Tom walks over to Charlie and starts to lead him to Claire. Charlie whispers "thank you" although I'm not sure whom he is speaking to. In the matter of seconds he's by Claire's side, his fingers entwined with hers as they walk to her fate. Aaron has stopped crying for now, but his mother is still sniffling. I lead them down to the boat dock. Tom, Danny and Juliet flank them. My friends say nothing as the lovers speak.
Charlie tells her about the tiny details, "I have a hid-a-key under the fire extinguisher in the hallway of the apartment building. If it's gone, knock on my neighbors door across the hall, her name is Carla, she has a spare key." He thinks for a moment has he leads her away from a divot in the road, constantly worried about her safety. "Listen, You'll be in Old Charlie's flat, Old Charlie was a womanizer and a drug addict. There's some heroin stashed behind the toilet seat and a few grand in cash in the freezer. Get rid of the drugs, but use the cash." He stops walking for a second to hold her, I'm tempted to yell at him and to tell him to keep it moving, but I don't. "Claire, I'm not that guy anymore. You know that right? Old Charlie died the day I met you. Do you understand?" She nods as her tears fall down her face.
He keeps talking as we trek towards the dock. "All my bills are paid on line, so all my accounts should be open. My rent's paid through till next August so you won't have to worry about that. Oh, all my on-line passwords are written down on a piece of paper taped under a teacup next to my laptop. I've got some money put aside in my checking and savings account. Not as much as I used to, but still enough to last you and Aaron for a little while, like a couple of years or so. " His voice hesitates for a second as the boat comes into his line of vision.
I half expect him to say something deep and meaningful but instead he spews, "Oh my god!" His jaw drops, "You know about porn don't you?"
She shakes her head confused, "The general topic or something specific?" She manages to crack out.
"Ok, for a long time I was a single man and I um, have quite the collection of "adult entertainment"" He uses air quotes for that last phrase. "I don't know if you know this but guys will find freaky messed up stuff and send it to each other. It's a real thing, honest." Charlie looks around to the other men around him for support.
Tom nods, "It's a thing, we all do it."
Charlie points to his cohort "See."
Through her tears and growing annoyance with Charlie's random comments, "Why are you telling me this?"
"Because I won't be there to explain to you I'm not into that bestiality," Charlie attempts to smile as Claire rolls her eyes at him.
The sounds our feet make changes as we leave the dirt path and walk onto the dock. Charlie becomes serious again. "I need you to live your life, to be happy and safe." They stop just before the boat and he wraps his arms around her and Aaron, pulling them close to him.
She rests her head on his shoulder, "I love you too, Charlie. I owe you everything." She whispers.
"You owe me nothing. You made me a better man, Claire Littleton. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you, but if there is a way for you and Aaron to leave here, then you need to get on this boat ok? Knowing you're in civilization, knowing Aaron is getting a proper education will make me just as happy as if we are together."
Ok, now I'm starting to feel like a monster.
It's Juliet who says, "You could go with her."
"There will be plenty of room on the boat and the plane." Tom adds. My crew mutinies for the sake of the young family. I don't think I've ever been more proud of them.
Claire's eyes shine with hope. Charlie kisses her on the lips. When they break away, he stares deep into her eyes, "I love you, but I can't go."
Her heart shatters in a million pieces in front of me, "Charlie?"
His voice is filled with the same determination and certainty as her was a few minutes earlier, "I'm not leaving my friends." He leads her on to the boat. He holds Aaron, kisses him and says; "Now you look after your mum while I'm away. I'm counting on you Turnip Head." He hands his son back to Claire. The boat's engine fires up, as Luke stands behind the wheel. One final kiss and he calls over the noise, "Everything I've ever told you was true, Claire. Everything."
The boat pulls away from the dock. Claire and Aaron disappear into the horizon. I turn away from Charlie and head home. Tom and Dan will take him back to his friends.
It's a long walk back. All I have is my thoughts to keep me company. The parting image of two lovers is etched into my brain. By the time I open the door to my house I'm exhausted. I go to flop down on the couch when I see my spot has been already occupied by Infinity. I pick up my daughter's rabbit and place him on my lap, petting him absent mindedly, my fingers tracing the number 8 on his back.
Why did Charlie stay behind?
It won't take long for the news to hit. Not long at all.
Crap, what have I done?
The front door opens and Tom sits in the armchair across from me. "Well I didn't see any of that coming." He sighed and puts his hands behind his head.
"Just once I would like to have an encounter with these people where I don't feel like the biggest asshole in the world." I groan. I rub my eyes with the palm of my hands.
"Ben, you did everything right. You gave Charlie what he wanted, there's no way this could possibly backfire on you. "
Of course this is going to backfire. The front door slams. "Is it true?" Alex screeches at the top of her lungs. How can a girl who's so small make so much noise? I rub my head hoping to stop the headache that is going to come. "Did you really send Claire and Aaron away?"
"You left Infinity's cage open again, he was sitting on the couch when I got home." Hopefully this will distract her.
"Did you or did you not send Claire away?" She stomps her foot on the ground, her curly brown hair flies everywhere.
"It was for the best." Logic.
"But I didn't get a chance to see her! I wanted to meet the baby!" She starts to whine. "Why do you ruin everything? Claire loved Charlie, that's all she used to talk about when she was with us. What's Charlie going to do now that she's gone? Did you even think about that?" She so angry her voice starts to crack and her eyes start to well up. "Why are you so mean? You're worse then Hitler!" Ok there's no way I'm THAT bad.
"Hey, now!" Tom snaps in my defense.
"Do you want to eat some puppies because that's what evil people do?" She storms in her bedroom.
"DON"T SLAM THE DOOR!" I yell.
SLAM. The door shakes the walls. I rub my temples, "are all teenage girls like this?"
"I'm sure my sister used to be like that."
"Did she out grow it?"
Tom shrugs, "I don't know, I think my parents buried her in the back yard." I smiled despite my horrible mood.
"Hey what do you think about Charlie's statement about us killing him? What was all that about?"
"I don't know… but Ethan had been acting…" Tom stops talking and looked out the window.
"What kind of man stays behind? I gave him an option to leave? To start a new life. Why did he stay behind?"
"Maybe he loved her that much."
"Do you think he is really a good man?" I ask uncertain.
"I don't know."
"Get me his files. And keep your eye on Claire." I assert the last of my power, after this little display, I don't know how much longer I am going to be in charge around here. Somehow I get a distant feeling that Charlie Pace will be my downfall.