Disclaimer: I only own the plot and my OCs. Anything you recognize as not mine belongs to Marvel Studios, Disney, and/or their otherwise respective owners.

Author's Notes: Hi, y'all! Sorry about the day-late update. I've been having some more health issues again. I'm having a medical procedure tomorrow because of it, but I don't think it'll keep me from updating next weekend, even if it's a day late again. I make no promises, though.

Chapter title comes from That's the Way of the World by Earth, Wind & Fire.

As always, hope you enjoy,

~TGWSI/Selene Borealis

~somebody to love~

~chapter 23: that's the way of the world~

They went up to Steve's floor for their talk. It wasn't neutral territory, not by any means, but Penny was not having this conversation on the communal floor where everyone could see and listen, even with how she felt. And she wasn't letting him onto her floor. Clint was the exception in that regard, not the rule.

The rest of Steve's floor was the same as his bedroom and study – which of course she'd already seen due to the prank she and Clint had pulled on him – were: modern, but with old-fashioned undertones. The two couches in his living room were large enough for him to sleep on if he ever wanted to, but they were also curved, which made her think they couldn't have been comfortable enough to do so frequently. But maybe he preferred it that way. She sat at the end of one of those couches and looked around his living room/kitchen combo which had been built exactly like hers, at the old time-y end tables and bookshelf filled with books, and the 1940's record player that must've cost two of her paychecks without the tips from the diner to get – presuming that Stark had bought it and it hadn't just been sequestered away in storage or whatever as one of Steve's things until he'd brought it with him to the Tower once he'd moved here.

There were, additionally, pictures on the walls: some of the Howling Commandos, a couple of Peggy Carter – including one of her and her family, which totally didn't make Penny's instincts feel pleased, no sir – as well as one of her, Steve, Howard Stark, and Bucky Barnes. Barnes had the most pictures, both photographs and drawings, dedicated to him by far. But there was one picture that wasn't on the walls, instead perched on the end table she was sitting next to. She couldn't help but notice it.

The picture had been colorized, she could tell. It wasn't of Barnes, Peggy Carter, Howard Stark, or anybody else, but rather of a woman with longe, honey blonde hair pulled up into a bun, albeit with two locks loose and falling into her face. She had blue, blue eyes, with bags underneath them. She appeared tired, but also strong. Resilient. A smile played at her lips.

"That's my ma," Steve said, noticing her looking. She nearly jumped out of her skin, as it seemed she'd been more focused on staring at the picture than she'd thought. He gave her the same smile that his mother had in the picture. "Can I get you something to drink?"

She didn't comment on how he'd said their conversation would only be a few minutes, and yet here he was, offering her a drink. It was probably just in his nature to. Steve Rogers, a mother hen of an alpha. "Coffee," she requested. "Your mother was a pretty lady."

"She was," he agreed, heading into his kitchen. "But she was a lot more than just that, too."

"I can tell."

"She was a nurse," Steve said from the kitchen, his voice not actually that much louder since they were both enhanced. She was able to hear him just fine. He bustled around, or so she could see from the halfway-open wall between his kitchen and living room. "Worked with tuberculosis patients. People always told her that she needed to stop, 'cause she would catch it one day and she had me to look after. But she always told them back that somebody needed to take care of the patients nobody else would, that everybody deserved to die with dignity."

Penny chuckled. "I can tell where you get that thing from yours, then?"

He looked up at her. "What thing?"

"'Always looking out for the little guy?'"

"Oh. Yeah." He laughed. "You made me realize I need to get better about that, though."

Abruptly, a grinding sound went off. She winced, bringing a hand up to her ears.

Steve saw this. "Sorry," he apologized.

"It's fine." But she was surprised. "You grind your own coffee beans?"

The alpha shrugged. "The noise is irritating, but freshly ground beans are better than not, aren't they?"

"Oh, yes," she agreed. "Yes, indeed."

She took off her purse as they waited for the coffee to brew, positioning it right next to her. They didn't speak until the coffee was ready; Steve stayed in the kitchen, selecting their mugs, getting out the things to put in their coffee. "What would you like with yours?" he questioned. "Cream? Sugar?"

"Do you have two-percent?" At his nod, she said, "Just some two-percent and a spoonful of sugar, please."

Once the coffee machine finished sputtering, he assembled their mugs and came out of the kitchen with them in each hand. As he handed her hers first before he put his down, she saw the contents of his mug and was mildly surprised. It was straight black. She wouldn't have pegged him as that kind of a person. Tony? Yes. He practically drank as much coffee as she did, and at some point you stopped giving a fuck if your coffee had cream, milk, or sugar in it or not, even if you preferred that it did. Natasha? Also yes, since she'd ordered a red-eye that time they'd gone to Macy's and the cafe after Penny had just moved in. But Steve, not so much.

She took a sip of her coffee, trying to stave off the inevitable. To her surprise, it was...good. Like, really good. "Wow," she said. "This is...really good."

He chuckled. "What, you weren't expecting that?"

Coffee was coffee. With how much she drank, she didn't really care how it tasted – although of course she always preferred good coffee – as long as it gave her the caffeine she needed.

She blinked. "No, it's just..." Penny looked down at her mug, then back at him. "Where did you get these beans?"

"A farmer's market in Brooklyn," he told her. "Near where I used to live."

That sounded familiar to her. "The one on," she began, before she said the street name.

Her response amused him, for some reason. "Yes." He tilted his head. "You're familiar with it?"

"My aunt and uncle used to take me there." Those were some fond memories. Ben and May had always let her pick something out when they'd gone there, or to any farmer's market in the city really. But the one in Brooklyn had been special to Ben, because that was the neighborhood he and her grandparents had moved to after they'd come up here from Texas, before her father had been born. And she'd always gotten some sort of cheese from there, because she'd been what her uncle and aunt had called a "cheese demon" as a kid. Obsessed with eating it. "But, I'm also familiar with the entire city. You should know that by now."

He huffed. "Yes, I should."

Silence lapsed between them.

Penny shifted in her seat. Come on, she thought, now starting to get annoyed as she had a second sip at her coffee. This was starting to get ridiculous. He was the one who had wanted them to have a talk, not the other way around. So could he just get it over with already? She wanted to go out as Spider-Woman.

Steve picked up on her discomfort. "Sorry," he apologized sheepishly. "I'm not meaning to prolong this. I've had a long time to think about what I've wanted to say, but now...I'm at a loss for words."

She snorted. "Cat got your tongue?"

"Something like that."

She opened her mouth to speak – to say what, she didn't know – and that seemed to be all of the encouragement he needed. "I'm sorry about that day in the gym," he said before she could so much as get a word in. "I made you uncomfortable, and that wasn't fair on me."

Penny suddenly, distinctly, and utterly felt out of her depth. "It wasn't you that made me feel uncomfortable," she attempted to lie. "It was Tony."

He wasn't afraid to call her out on her bullshit. "If you really felt that way, you'd be avoiding him right now, not me." He wasn't angry at her attempt to spare his feelings, however. She could tell as much from his expression. So, there was that. "And I understand why you have been, don't get me wrong. I told you that I understood what you've been going through, that I was sorry that I didn't recognize it sooner, and then I went ahead and did...that."

She looked down at her mug, swirling around the contents of it slowly. She had a feeling of where he was going to go with this, and she didn't want to be looking at him when he said his next words.

"I knew – know – from watching my ma growing up how hard, sometimes impossible, it is for somebody to move on after their bonded mate is gone," Steve said softly, sure enough. "She couldn't. It was another thing people always said she needed to do for my sake, get married. But she didn't. And I...looked at your mouth. I put you in a position where I made you feel like – "

She was tired of him telling her how she felt. He didn't mean anything by it, she knew, but she was her own person. She knew how she felt.

And what she felt was a need to confirm that –

"Do you actually feel that way?"

He didn't need to say it.

His heartbeat said it all.

"I do," he said anyways. "But – "

Tears blurred her vision. "Don't say it doesn't change anything," she told him, wiping at her eyes. When she glanced up through her eyelashes, he looked pained beyond belief. But he couldn't promise her what he obviously wanted to. Nobody could promise her anything anymore. "It's already done that."

"I know," he acknowledged. "That's not what I was going to say."

Steve leaned forwards. He clasped his hands together. "You're not ready," he said softly. "And I'm not just saying that to put words in your mouth. I know. I don't think I'm ready, either. I didn't have the same relationship with Pe – "

Penny couldn't bear to hear the woman's name, not right now.

"Stop," she requested. "Just, please – "

Just like that, she was crying. Setting her mug onto a coaster on the coffee table in front of her, she buried her face into her hands. Her tears dropped onto her fingers, and they felt just as real as they had in her dream.

Harry.

Harry.

Penny was an omega, sure. But she was strong, independent, capable, resilient. And she hated feeling weak, like she did right now.

She hated that a part of her just wanted to give in and tell Steve everything right now because of what the Harry in her dream had said, whether or not he'd been real – which would have to start with how she was an omega, because he didn't even know that. She hated it, because this was the moment she had promised herself back in February when she'd first moved in that would have her leave the Tower...and yet, she didn't want to leave. She couldn't even get up off of Steve's couch.

He sighed. "I'm only making things worse, aren't I?"

"Shut up," she growled, though her voice was muffled by her hands. "Just...shut up."

To her surprise, he did.

When she was able to calm herself enough to look up at him, she saw that his expression was pained. He looked like he wanted to say something again, but she nipped that in the bud. "If you're going to tell me another time about how you think I feel, I'm going to kick your ass into next Sunday," she threatened.

He was chagrined, but understanding. "Noted."

Taking in an unsteady breath to calm herself, she looked once more around his living room. She focused on the pictures, and they seemed to calm her even more for whatever reason.

"You're right, I'm not ready," she said. "To be honest, I don't think I ever will be. My husband died because of me. That's not something I think I can come back from.

"But I can't keep on dealing with you being weird around me. The weird looks, the walking around me on eggshells – those things have to stop. We're both Avengers, and we're both adults. Do you think you can do that?"

She was putting the ball in his court. Partially, this was because none of this was her fault, she wasn't the one who had suddenly caught feelings from that day in the gym (although they were soulmates, so she supposed she couldn't really be surprised that he had).

But also partially, this was her trying to give herself an out. If he said no, then she could force herself to leave, as much as most of her didn't feel like doing that anymore. She could leave the Tower and never come back. She could move to London, or Rome, or somewhere else in the world where none of them would be able to find her. She wasn't quite sure where that was, but she would make it work.

But of course, he was Steve Rogers. And with another of course, that meant he instantly went down the path of redemption. "I won't," he said, only to wince. "I mean...I'll try not to? Let me know if I do start acting weird again."

"Deal," she said, although her heart wasn't really into it. Goddamn him for not giving her the easy way out. "And I'm..." Her eyes darted away from him. "I'm sorry, too. I shouldn't have let this go on for so long between us."

"You've ben busy," he said. "I understand."

"No, it's not just that." She blew out a puff of air, letting it expand her cheeks. "Natasha told me a month ago I needed to talk to you, and I knew before then that I needed to. I just haven't wanted to, because..." Abruptly, she didn't want to be having this conversation. She grabbed her purse and stood up. "I need to go."

Steve looked sad, but he didn't try to stop her. "Your patrol. Right."

"Right," she echoed. She made for the elevator, not so much as turning her head even slightly to look back at him. "See you later, Rogers."

"...See you around, Delilah."

Penny tried to not look too surprised, even through her mask. "Holy shit."

Weasel glared at her. "Yeah, yeah, laugh it up. Everybody else here has," he muttered even as he got out her wine glass and then the Roscato bottle to fill it up with, albeit he had to shuffle his weight a little awkwardly in order to do so.

"I'm not laughing," she said as she sat down. "You actually look like, really good."

"Don't bullshit me," he warned.

"You do," she insisted. She rolled up her mask and picked up her now-filled glass, tilting it back and forth a little, not quite ready to drink it yet. "You're glowing."

"That's called sweat."

"No, it's not that. Believe me, I know. Everybody else here is sweatier than a high hog – "

"Hey!" one of the mercs nearby gruffed.

She flipped him off. "Fuck off. You know it's true, don't even bother trying to deny it." She turned back to Weasel. "But you're not anymore than to be expected. You look nice, Wes."

"I'm fat. I have swollen ankles," he complained. He waved a hand, gesturing to the entire room. "And I'm around all this alcohol and I can't have even a drop of it."

"Oh, just give it another three months or so. Provided that you decide not to breastfeed, you'll be able to have a drink soon enough."

"You say that like having an actual live, human baby depending on you for their every want and need isn't terrifying."

She shrugged. "Humans have done it for thousands of years, Weasel. A large number of them are idiots. You have the upper hand over them because you and Wade aren't ones. Well," she paused to wrinkle her nose. "You're not one, at least."

"That is so reassuring."

She didn't dignify him with a response. Ripping her wallet off of her thigh, she opened it up and thumbed through her bills. It still surprised her how many she had these days, now that she didn't have to pay rent. "How much do I owe you?"

He made a noise from the back of his throat. "About that."

Penny's head shot up. The fear that went through her was no small thing, as it consumed her entire body like a forest fire. "You don't have it?"

She couldn't deal with it if he didn't. This entire day had already been a clusterfuck, between her dream and Steve, if Weasel didn't have her scent and heat suppressants on top of everything else –

"Hey, relax," Weasel said. "I have it." To prove his point, he held up the pill packet and put it on the bar counter. "And it's the same price as it usually is. But, Spidey – "

"Weasel."

They had the same conversation every time she came here. The same back and forth ever since she'd surpassed the recommended six-month timeframe for her suppressants about how it was dangerous for her to keep on being on them. It didn't change the fact that she needed them, which was why he'd always relented in giving her the medication.

So why was he being more hesitant than usual now?

...Well, perhaps he wasn't being more hesitant than usual. He still accepted her money when she held it out to him and slid the pill packet across the table. It seemed there was just a new argument coming about this time. "Have you thought about what those pills are doing to you? Like, really thought about it?"

"They're going to kill me one day. I know that, Wes. We've been over it before."

He shook his head. "That's not what I meant." One of the guys came up to get a refill from him. Weasel made him his new drink, focusing back on her once he was finished. "Maybe I'm just getting soft because of this – " he pointed to his stomach " – but...what's gonna happen when you want a family, Spidey? What if these meds are impacting your fertility?"

Her throat tightened. "They're not doing that, Wes."

"And how do you know?" he retorted. "Do one of the Avengers doctors know you're an omega?" At her silence, he scoffed. "Look, I know you've been on these or somethin' like him a lot longer than I've been giving them to you."

"What?" she protested. "No, I haven't!"

He raised an eyebrow. "Really? Then how come nobody else besides the people here know that you're an omega?"

Naturally, she couldn't answer that. Not without revealing how she'd made the universe forget her entire existence.

"Look, even if you have only been taking these pills as long as I've been giving them to you, that's still almost four times the amount of time than you're supposed to take them for," Weasel reminded her. "And I can't...I can't in good conscience keep on allowing that."

"I thought you didn't have a conscience."

"I do when I need to," he shot back. The other omega heaved out a breath. "I'm going on maternity leave in two months, provided this brat doesn't decide she – " Penny probably should've mentioned that, that he and Wade had found out they were having a girl. Weasel had joked it meant so much for having a little brother for Ellie when he'd first told her, but she'd seen the happiness in his eyes over it " – wants to come out before then. I'll get you a supply for four months after that, but no more."

She spluttered. "Weasel – "

He couldn't seriously be doing this? She wasn't ready for them to know about her being an omega yet! She wasn't ready for them to know that she was their –

"No, you're not changing my mind on this," he spoke over her. "I'm doing this for your own good. I might not be your doctor strictly speaking, but I am concerned for your health. Somebody needs to be, if not you."

Penny was not going to cry for the second time that day – third, if you included in her dream. She was not.

She was not, she was not, she was –

"Hey, I get it. You're upset. But before you go," Weasel went, and it was only then that she realized she'd gotten to her feet, her wine glass discarded on the bar counter, the wallet and the pill packet clutched in her hands. "I thought you should know, Wade and I finally decided on a name."

She sniffled. "You – you did?"

They'd been arguing about it for months, ever since they'd found out they were having a girl.

"Yeah," he said. There wasn't a light of recognition behind his eyes as he added, "Her name's going to be Penelope, or Penny for short."

Word Count: 3,544

Next Chapter Title: heart of glass