Me: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Roy: What's wrong with you?

Me: Nothing--NO! Something!

Roy: Guh?

Me: You see, tonight is the last episode of FullMetal Alchemist, and I'm going to try to stay up till midnight to watch it! And then watch it again the next morning because I'll have tapped it!

Roy: So what's the point of staying up for it?

Me: 'Cuz…It's monumental! The last episode ever!

Roy: And this is good how?

Me: IT'S NOT!-! I don't want it to be over! Not now--right when I finally start drooling over Ed and Al as I should! And I don't even know when the movie's coming out either--but at least I'm buying the DVDs now!

Roy: …You're a sad, mentally unstable, little girl, aren't you?

Me: (smacks Roy) Don't call me little! I'm like, two and a half heads taller then Ed!

Roy: Pfft! So am I.

Me: I know.

Al: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!-!-!-!-!-!

Roy: What?

Al!-!--?-?--!-!

Me: He's speechless…and scared out of his wits.

Roy: Why?

Me: (points to dictionary in Al's hands)

Roy: Oh…You mean he looked IT up? I mean, IT is so wrong! Just plain disgusting! The fact that it's him and Ed, they're brothers, AND they're both guys--

Me: Oh, you don't think it's disgusting when it's you in his place.

Roy: What?

(Note: I have not yet seen the last episode, though I'm sure that by the time this chapter is posted, I will have. But like so many things in life; I chose to ignore it. So if I get certain facts wrong--it's intentionally… and due to a lack of knowledge. Plus, I'm going to kind of making up my own ending for it in this story, maybe… If I do--I'm pretty sure it won't have spoilers in it.)

Disclaimer: How is there a chance to own now with only one episode left? It better be good, 'cuz if it's not… (grr…).

Chapter 9: SoulReaper vs. FullMetal

The young boy smiled at Ed and said "hello, Niisan" before punching his lights out.

Ed lay on the ground a moment, not quite knocked out by the punch, but still too stunned to get up.

"How dare you," mumbled the alchemist, balling his fist once more. "How dare you come back after all this time?-!" he shouted. Ed wedged his eyes open, just enough to stare up at the boy. He was probably 16 or 17, and he wore the same outfit that Ed did. Rain drops lazily dripped from his long bangs that hung over his hazel eyes. "How dare you..." he hissed again.

At last, Ed found the energy to sit up, and before saying a word, he swung his leg around and tripped the other boy. "What the hell is your problem?" he yelled, bolting to his feet. The other boy glared up at Ed and sprung up at him, tackling him at the waist as his response. The two fell to the ground and slid several feet away.

"Why?" screamed the boy, punching Ed in the face. "Why didn't you come back?"

"I don't know what the hell you're talking about!" shouted Ed, trying but failing to block the other boy's assaults. Despite how pitiful it was, Ed let his guard down. The boy had stopped throwing punches and was now only leaning over him with, fat tears dripping down his cheeks and onto Ed.

"I waited..." he choked, still pinning Ed to the ground. "I waited for years...But you--" he stopped, clenched his teeth, and looked away. "You never came back..." he whispered. Ed stared up at him, eyes wide and wavering. The boy looked back down at him and grimaced. "Got to hell, Niisan." and punched him once more, finally knocking Ed out.

X

X

X

"Ugh..." moaned flirty Ed, finally regaining consciousness a little while later. "What happened...?" he groaned, rubbing his head.

"Behold, Sleeping Beauty awakes! How was your nap, Princess?" asked Mr. Smarty-Pants sarcastically. Flirty Ed shot him a very nasty look, though, still not back to his full senses.

"Again, what happened?" he repeated.

"We're not quite sure." stated Emo Ed. "All we know is that Winry's asleep in her room, two guards are lying dead outside the front gates, and--"

"And you got your ass handed to you by our little brother!" chirped little Ed with a broad grin. Flirty Ed stared at him.

"Huh?" he asked stupidly, glancing over at the suit of armor that was standing in the corner of the room.

"It wasn't me!" squeaked Al, waving his hands wildly at his brother.

"Then who--"

"Me." came a voice from the other side of the room. Flirty Ed stopped, not wanting to turn around. Without the rain pounding in his ears, he could clearly tell whose voice that was. At last he turned around, and when he saw his attacker, he fell flat out of the bed.

"It's you!" he screeched, now flailing about on the floor. "Keep away! Keep away!" The other boy huffed, crossing his arms and turning away. Flirty Ed quit acting like a lunatic for a moment to ask "wait, why aren't you trying to kill me anymore?"

"Because once he saw the rest of us, he knew that something was wrong and decided to let us live long enough to get us back together." said Emo Ed flatly.

"But just in case he decides to pull a fast one--I'm his official escort." said angry Ed, cracking his knuckles.

"But..." mumbled flirty Ed, still cowering behind the bed. "Who is he?"

The other Eds groaned, even the little one. "Isn't it obvious?" cried Edwina desperately.

Flirty Ed shook his head with a bewildered look on his face: "nuh uh."

"I'm Alphonse Elric, sate alchemist. Code name: the SoulReaper alchemist." said the new Al. The Eds stared at him.

'We better start being a better brother (/sister), or else Al will be doomed to be Mr. Sunshine over there...' Thought flirty Ed, slightly afraid the boy. "But why are there two Als?"

Smarty Ed began to laugh maniacally, getting the attention of everyone in the room. "NOW will you all listen to my explanation?"

"NO!"

X

X

"Um...Niisan?" asked armor Al a little while later, after everyone had rushed out of the room, preferring to be bored rather than listen to Smarty Ed.

Flirty Ed turned around and smiled at his brother. "Hm?"

"Well...I know how you're the one that got gypped out of all the smarts when you split, or whatever," said Al timidly. Ed practically fell over. Was he really that stupid? (Um...Yes.) "But still, who do you think that boy really is?"

Flirty Ed shrugged. "Dunno, but he sure can kick my ass. Something the real you can never do." he added cheerfully.

"But...every time we spar, I always end up winning."

Ed stopped. "That's 'cuz I go easy on 'ya!" he squeaked nervously, laughing away his lie.

"Hey!" called Edwina, running up to the two boys. "Wanna go out shopping with me?" she chirped.

"Ew! No! Girly-girl-clothes-shopping--it burns!" cried flirty Ed comically, though he stopped when Eddie smacked him upside the head.

"No, dimwit," she huffed. "Grocery shopping; I thought we could make dinner for some of our friends tonight."

"Friends?" snorted flirty Ed. "What friends?"

Again, Edwina smacked him. "I mean, like Roy, Riza, Hughes, and all those other guys."

"Oh. Why didn't you just say that then?"

Eddie groaned.

X

X

"Soo..." asked Al at once they had arrived at the market. "What's on your list?"

"Well, I was thinking that we could make stew and--"

"WAIT!" called a small voice, echoing through the small streets of the market. The three stopped and stared down the bazaar. That voice... "Wait for me, Alison!" it cried out. Before they knew it, a small boy dashed out from behind a building, frantically glancing around. "Alison!" he whimpered.

Just then, a young teenaged girl emerged out of the crowd and grabbed the little boy's hand. "Sheesh," she hissed, pulling him away. "Quit embarrassing me like that." she ordered. The little boy nodded, wiping away his tears. The two turned around, just noticing the two Eds and the suit of armor staring at them. The two people stared back, the little boy automatically clinging to the girl's leg.

Flirty Ed and Edwina finally tore their gaze away from the two strangers and looked up at Al, who was standing oddly still and looked as frightened as a suit of armor could look. "Oh, shit." he muttered.

Me: Yay!

Al: Not Yay.

Me: Not Yay?

Al: No.

Me: Why?

Al: Because you're an awful, evil person.

Me: Yes, thank you, I know that. Mwa ha ha...

Roy: Problem.

Me: What?

Roy: Al doesn't cuss--not like, ever.

Me: ...

Al: He's got a point.

Me: Well...You see, that, um... It's funnier that way?

Others: (groan)

Me: Now...Review! Though, you've probably already guessed what's going on by now.

Flirty Ed: I haven't.

Me: That's because you're an idiot.