London, England – Caustically Beautiful

"Should I let you take the lead then, Anna?" John flexed his fingers against the arms of the chair as Anna's stroked the skin of his jawline, her lips still a breath from his.

"You don't want the lead?"

"I think I'd be a fool to try and take it from you when I believe you belong in the lead." John shrugged, "And you seem to enjoy it too much for me to threaten taking it from you."

"I do so like being in charge." Anna pulled back a fraction and chewed the inside of her cheek a moment. "But I am curious, would you stop me?"

"From taking the lead?"

"If you wanted something else other than me in the lead."

John held Anna's eyes, "I don't think I could stop you doing anything."

"Couldn't you?"

"No, I couldn't." John continued to gaze into Anna's face. "I wouldn't dare."

"Maybe you should dare."

"I wouldn't have the strength to do that."

"You wouldn't need strength to stop me."

"I wouldn't?" John's eyebrows rose.

"No." Anna shook her head. "It would only take one word to stop me."

"One word?"

"One word." Anna nodded and paused, her fingers barely gracing his jaw and stopping just short of touching his lips. "One word and I step back and this goes no further. I won't mention it, I won't hold it against you and I believe you wouldn't hold it against me, it would simply be a blip on our existences, and it would just be a moment we almost shared and nothing more."

"You'd be willing to do that?"

"I want to keep you in my life, John, and if that means that I need to accept that we're not going to be compatible in a way that would be far more physical than our current relationship allows, then that'll have to be that." Anna bit at her lip for a second. "If that is what you want."

"It's not what I want." John moved to put his hands over hers and shift his hold so he could kiss Anna's hands. Slowly, carefully, and ensuring that his lips lingered on her skin before replacing her hands on his shoulders. "I don't want a nicer version of what happened last time."

"No?"

"No."

"Then what do you want?" One of Anna's hands moved from his shoulder to trace over John's lips. "Because I'll do whatever you want."

"Whatever I want?"

Anna gave a solemn nod. "Whatever you want."

"Then, if you will do whatever I want, you'll be happy."

"Happy?" Anna narrowed her eyes. "You want me to be happy?"

"Yes, I want you to be happy." John kissed the tips of Anna's fingers. "Can you do that for me? Can you be happy?"

"Not on my own." Anna brushed the backs of her fingers against John's cheek before moving them to stroke the back of his neck. "I'll need help. Loads of it."

"I'm ready and willing to assist in that department, if you'll have me."

Anna made a show of pursing her lips to think for a moment before responding. "I can't think of anyone better to help me do the work." Her hand firmed around the back of John's neck to urge his head to tilt in the position she wanted. "But it'll be a rather difficult job. You'll have to work night and day at it."

"I'm sure I can find the time for it." John smiled up at Anna. "Unless you have other needs that you would like met."

"You mean other than the needs you already meet by being my bodyguard on the regular with impossible hours?"

"Everyone has to take a break on occasion." John managed a little smile. "If you take breaks and if you have any other needs."

"I do have other needs."

"You do?"

"I do." Anna nodded, acting solemn again. "So many."

"You'd best start making a list then. I don't want to miss anything."

"I don't think you'll miss anything."

"So no list then?"

"Not right now." Anna's lips ghosted over John's. "Right now, I've a need to be kissed and I want you to be the one assisting in that endeavor."

"Your wish is my command." John leaned the half an inch forward for his lips to meet Anna's and he could almost taste her sigh of relief.

Her sigh triggered a relaxing of her hand. It still held at the back of his neck and John almost shivered with the soft brush of her fingers against his skin. But with the kiss as her focus, and John's attention immediately alleviating any possible worries, the relaxation practically rolled through Anna like a wave until John could feel it in himself.

In response to that, he kept his hands light. More than anything he wanted to keep their attention on the moment. To keep them engrossed in the value of the moment that now signaled a veritable crossing of the Rubicon for them. They were to be more now and he did not want to lose the weight of that decision on hurry or worry. It would be significant because they had chosen it to be so and he wanted to bask in that feeling.

Anna, on the other hand, proved a little less patient and a little more insistent. She allowed a moment of basking before sliding her hands from John's neck to grip into his suit jacket. Adjustments in her hold there or moving back to his neck or scrabbling to hold along his jaw seemed to telegraph a level of desperation to her motions but John read it more as a desire to take in every detail of him. To memorize each second as quickly as possible to hold onto it forever.

And when her level of borderline desperation made it hard for John to argue her intentions or motives, those easy to follow through by the way she broke and reengaged their kisses, John succumbed to her siren call. He followed willingly as she pursued their kiss with vigor and focus until it was all John could do to keep up with her. It was not until his lack of air led his vision to fizzle slightly and a light feeling permeated his skull that John broke the kiss for himself.

The rise and fall of Anna's chest, matched the rapidity of their blinking and seemed to betray the moment it took for them not only to regain their breath but also to recognize the moment. The confusion of rational thought after a moment of passion only ended by the mutual need for air. But as they managed minute movements, fingers soft and light in their touches as their breathing eased, they regained the almost giggling glory that came with their realization that they were here, now, in the moment with one another. It fed their need more completely than any buffet had ever satisfied anyone before.

It held them in thrall to the point neither could move. Like the second before the surface tension burst a bubble, they hesitated to shatter the tension. If they could live in the moment forever and never risk destroying it and therefore dwell eternally on the optimistic possibilities instead of any of the threats or disappointments they would.

So they continued to stare at one another, in silence, until their breathing grew louder in their ears. It thundered along with the blood that left John's body almost vibrating with the tension of staying on the end, so close to falling. The swoop in his stomach left his nerves sparking and his fingers twitched as if he could slip through the moment and feel Anna again.

Then he would hold her. Maybe he would never let go. But if he broke the moment then it would be reality. Or it would stop short of reality and prove a false hope. If he did not move then he could live in the moment of hope and lose nothing. But if he did not reach forward then he would never know.

But John did not initiate the next phase. Anna did. And she did not hesitate the way he did. Perhaps she thought faster than he did. Or perhaps she did not want to live in the hope of the moment as much as she wanted to see the moment come to fruition.

With her move, she risked it all and John could do nothing but not let her fall.

Her hands hand forced John's suit jacket from his shoulders as far as she could until John's position in the chair proved an encumbrance. Then they fought against it together, squirming without finesse to struggle against the fabric in a motion that broke their attempt to reengage their kiss. After a moment of trying to help John out of the jacket, but succeeding more in distracting him with attempts at extending their kisses, Anna interlaced her fingers at the back of John's neck to hold herself to him.

John, half trapped in his jacket, struggled to lean into the kiss and return it with as much vigor as Anna gave to him. She shifted on his lap as John leaned forward and kept their equilibrium as John finally freed himself from his jacket and tossed it to the side. For a moment John worried Anna would tumble to the floor but she kept herself steady as John resettled in the chair. A resettlement that separated them for a second.

Barely a breath passed between them before Anna pressed hard against John and her lips took control of their kiss again. The scrambled of her fingers over his buttons, his shoulders, down his arms, and over his face almost had John laughing giddily into their kiss at her desperation. But when he matched it with how his hands flexed at her hips or shifted to brush at her breasts or even grip at her ass to bring her closer and resettle her on his lap John realized he was just as desperate as she was.

The chair creaked under them but held firm as they maneuvered around. Buttons and zippers gave way under their determination until they were exposed enough to force themselves to pause. They did not speak as Anna leaned forward, one of her hands holding at the back of John's neck and the other dropping between them to glide over the tip of him. John jerked in her hold and held his breath to stop himself reacting immediately. He almost bit through his cheek as Anna's smile grew and her fingers continued their tracing path over him and then sent him almost jumping from a sitting position when she gripped him.

After a moment Anna's fingers lifted off him but did not leave the space between them. Instead John watched as she slipped her fingers between her legs and used her hold at the back of John's neck to keep herself on John's lap as she began stroking herself. It only took John a moment of watching before his fingers tangled with hers and joined the attempt to bring Anna to the end of climax. His other hand acted as a counterpoint to keep Anna in position while her fingers dug into the back of his neck.

Her hips rolled against their fingers and John leaned back into the chair as Anna's forehead pressed into John's shoulder. The speed of her breathing picked up and John's fingers crooked to find the place inside Anna that would send her over the edge. And, with her fingers flicking at her clit, she cried out her finish.

John continued with his fingers, sliding them slowly through Anna's folds as her muscles finished clenching. Her legs quivered on either side of him and eventually her fingers relaxed on the back of John's neck. As her head lifted from his shoulder, Anna turned to kiss John. He returned the kiss, falling into it to the point he almost missed the moment Anna's slick fingers returned to holding to his erection.

The shock to his system had John breaking the kiss to let out a groan. He caught, through the slight haze to his vision, Anna's grin but through his head back with an even deeper groan as Anna's knees dug into his hips to lift herself enough to slide down. A clench of John's jaw and a clutch of his fingers on Anna's waist as she shifted and readjusted until they were as close as they could be.

Once again, the world seemed to stop. They held to one another, breathing in sync, and settled into a slow, rolling rhythm. It hiccupped and started, stopping and pausing as they tried to find the right the tempo they both wanted, but eventually John committed to his habit of following Anna's lead. There was nothing else to do but meet her at the pace she set, as furious and frenetic as it was. Despite the creaking of the chair, the possible threat of landing painfully in a heap of splintered wood, they continued.

John's fingers dug into Anna's hip proportionally to the rake of her nails at the back of his neck and, once again, their fingers fumbled together near Anna's clit as she adjusted and pressed forward trying to bring the pressure she wanted. The moans she released between heaving breaths mixed with the grunts and staggered gasps John managed as he struggled to keep his climax at bay. It proved almost not enough but John bit into his cheek to stop himself coming just as Anna's back arched and she came with a cry.

Despite the constraints of their position, the rumpled trap of their clothes, and the still suspicious squeaks of the chair, John encouraged the rolling continuation of Anna's climax as his came. Anna kissed desperately at John's lips before kissing whichever part of his skin she could reach as his arms wrapped around her. They held and clutched at one another as they descended from their high and, slowly, they managed to breathe easier.

Trying to move again, the chair creaked and John froze. Anna snorted a laugh at the expression on his face before she slowly untangled herself from her position on John's lap. "I think we might've pushed that chair to its limits."

"No arguments there." John put his hand to the seat and pushed himself to stand.

Or he would have if the chair had not chosen that moment to snap. The seat cracked and John tripped to the side. His weight half landed on the seat and it split in half under him. A sharp pain later had John on his ass on the floor as Anna stared on in horror.

Her hands flew to cover her mouth as John groaned. "Ow."

"Are you alright?"

"I think so." John put a hand to the floor and slid slightly to get his good leg bent under him and pushed up to stand on his prosthetic. Another moment and he was on his feet, rubbing furiously at his backside. "The worst damage is to my pride I think."

"I don't think there was anything you could've done to stop that." Anna came forward, a rolling chair in her grip. "Maybe I should've made sure all the furniture I purchased in here could withstand a bit more vigorous use than I expected."

"I'm not sure manufacturers are traditionally in the habit of making sure their furniture is sex-proofed. And if it is, I don't want to know the details for product testing or the quality assurance sign-off." John gingerly sat on the rolling chair before sighing. "I guess there's got to be a little pain with pleasure."

"Do you like that sort of thing?" Anna ran her tongue over her teeth and John swallowed as the potential twitch near his still open trousers signaled that the chance for another erection was not as slim as he previously considered.

"I can't say I've ever really investigated it but I'm softer than I look so I don't think so." John shrugged and tugged at the tails of his shirt to try and rebutton it while also unfolding where his waistcoat tucked and folded into an awkward twist under his arm. "It's not something that excites me."

"I've heard it's all about the partner." Anna put her hand over John's, stopping him halfway through bis shirt buttons so she could take over. "But I don't believe in trying to coerce someone into something that they don't think they'll like when pleasure's on the line. If it's not fun then the purpose is lost."

"Is it always fun for you?" John waited for Anna to answer, almost biting the tip of his tongue when the silence stretched until Anna was two buttons from closing him into his collar. But when she flipped his collar into position over his straightened waistcoat and met his eyes the tension in John's shoulders relaxed.

"I want it to be with you." Anna leaned toward to press a soft kiss to John's lips. "Whatever that means, I want it with you."

"And if it doesn't work out?"

"You mean because I'm basically cradle-robbing by being with you?" Anna shrugged, "There are more scandalous things I could do with my career. Like making a spectacle of myself on national television."

"I think the world forgave you for that when your new designs showed you were serious about still being in the game." John swallowed, "And I do… I want to see where this could go as well."

"But?"

"But I am worried about what it'll mean for you. I'm worried what people will say about it and about you."

"You think I care what people think?"

"I think you care a great deal what people think." John took a breath, "And I think you want to care less about it but you don't know how."

"No, I don't." Anna bit at her lip as her fingers played with the hem of her shirt. "I don't know how to not care what people think or not to worry about what they might think to the point it's almost paralyzing."

She took a breath, "But I don't worry about that as much with this."

"But you are worried about this?"

"I'm worried that people'll think I've dragged you into my troubles."

"Into you…"

Anna gestured toward herself. "Successful or not, I am a bit of a public disaster. People'll think I've somehow drawn the wool over your eyes and dragged you into my troubles. You'll be in the public eye in a way that could make you look the fool."

"I do believe Ms. Austen said we're all fools in love." John shrugged and waited a moment before reaching forward to put his hand over where Anna's tugged incessantly at the hem of her shirt. The motion forced Anna to meet his eyes. "And I don't mind sharing whatever those troubles are."

"No?"

"No." John swallowed, "I only worry that you'll regret it."

"I couldn't. Not ever." Anna closed the distance between them. "Not ever."

"Not ever?" John gave a small smile. "That's a long time."

"It is." Anna nodded, "But that's because I know now, for the first time in a longer time than I care to admit, I feel excited about things. I feel hopeful and I feel… I feel that I've finally the person I was meant to be. I'm finally discovering the person I'm supposed to be."

"Better late than never I guess."

"I guess." Anna shared John's smile and leaned forward to give him a kiss.

As it began to spin out and Anna made a move to close what little distance remained, the chair swiveled and broke their kiss. It took them both a second to get a handle on the situation but it left them both giggling like children as they tried to get a hold of themselves and their giddy excitement. John kissed the back of Anna's hand and each of her fingers.

"I think, if we want to continue this, we should move to a safer venue."

"I agree with that." Anna stepped back to allow John to stand and they collected the remains of their clothes. "Leave the chairs though."

"You have plans for them?"

"I don't know." Anna shrugged, "I might find some use for them later."

"What kind of use?"

"Maybe I'll let you see for yourself."

John grinned.

Yorkshire, England – Reality

The breaths held between them vanished in an instant and an eternity simultaneously. As John's fingers flipped the lock, the sharp thock of the metal sliding into position temporarily broke the silence between them. But when Anna's hand found John's, her cane knocking against one of the panes of glass in the door's frosted viewing window, the tension of the moment persisted if the rise of the hairs on the back of John's neck was anything to go by. What was more, as Anna left her cane propped against the door so her hand could coast up John's arm, the threats to the silence that surrounded seemed to only heighten the sensations coming from the remainder of their senses.

John opened his mouth, as if to speak, but stopped when Anna's whispered words rang out across the space between them. "I do believe, you suggested something the last time we stood in your entryway."

"Did I?" John's voice caught in his throat as he struggled to swallow as Anna's hand continued up John's arm to find his jacket and tugged on it to pull it loose from his shoulder.

"Well…" Anna made a face as her other hand smoothed over John's shirt to find the other side of John's jacket so she could push it from his shoulders. "Maybe I suggested it but I guess it's all semantics now."

"I guess it is." John took a breath and shrugged his shoulders to help get his jacket onto the floor. "But I don't remember what was said."

"Oh?" Anna pursed her lips, leaning forward as her fingers crawled to the buttons on John's shirt and began to pry them apart. "You don't remember?"

"Not clearly."

"Then let me remind you." Anna's nails clicked along the plastic buttons as she freed them to leave John's chest on tactile display for her. "I suggested that maybe we could simply do it here in the entryway. As dirty and delectable as that animalistically pleasurable experience would've been, you suggested we do it another time."

"I suggested it?" John blinked and then shivered as Anna's nails scraped over his chest and he glanced down to realize his shirt was now entirely open.

"You said we should save it for later." Anna's tongue traced over her lip, "I believe now is later."

"Is it?" John forced himself to breathe as Anna's fingers ran lower and her nails clinked over his belt before she began tugging it loose.

"I think it is." She paused, her finger tracing over his skin just above his trouser line. "Unless you disagree."

"I'd be an idiot to say anything against you."

"Maybe. But…" One of Anna's hands skated up John's chest to flatten against his skin just over his heart. "I am being serious. As much as I want to take you on the floor of your entryway, I don't want to force you into anything."

"Is that what you think you'd be doing?"

"Yes." Anna kept her hands on John but stepped back enough to straighten her arms and leave more physical distance between them. "Situations like this can make it difficult to think clearly."

"Are you thinking clearly?"

"Science says that women think most clearly before sex and men think most clearly after sex. If that is true then I'm thinking more clearly now than you are. Therefore," Anna took a breath, "I need to give you a chance to think clearly and answer honestly."

"Are you afraid that you're manipulating me, Ms. Smith?"

"Absolutely." Anna grinned at him, "I know that I have an advantage."

"Then let me put your fears to rest." John put a hand over Anna's at his belt. "While I may be hesitant, I'm willing."

"And why would you be hesitant, Mr. Bates?" Anna paused, "I hope we're not about to have a second go at the conversation we had the last time we stood in your entryway."

"No. We dealt with that then." John wrapped his hand over Anna's and brought it to his mouth to kiss. "My worry is rushing."

"There's a time and place for that."

"Absolutely." John began slowly kissing his way over Anna's arm. "But having failed at one relationship that was a rather large portion of my life before, I don't want to rush this now and waste the chance to savor every moment."

"You think this is worth savoring?"

"I think everything about you is worth savoring."

"My dear Mr. Bates," Anna shivered and shifted closer to John as he found the edge of her shirt and started tugging it upward. "You are rather smooth with your words."

"I endeavor to be charming when I'm trying to seduce a woman."

"And here I thought I was going to seduce you."

"We can seduce one another." John shrugged, "I figure that would be fair."

"Then would you allow me to continue trying to seduce you, Mr. Bates?"

"I thought you wanted to shag me on the floor."

"Seduction takes many forms." Anna's hand firmed on John's belt and jerked him toward her. "So, are you willing to be seduced?"

"I'm sure if you move your hand lower you'll see how true that is."

"I definitely will." Anna took her hand from John's grasp and opened John's belt. "Now, how comfortable is your floor?"