Severus Snape stormed into his quarters, determined to find out how quickly he could incapacitate himself with a bottle of Ogden's finest. Bugger it all, he snarled mentally. It figures that the first woman he had any sort of interest in for the past decade had to be under the effect of a Love Potion.
"BLOODY HELL!" The fire roared to life as he carelessly gestured, focusing his anger toward the pile of logs. "That ruddy little bitch… how could she do this… what right did she… bugger… she's going to hate me…" Severus muttered as he paced in front of the fireplace. His temper rose as he thought of Hermione's lips on his; the rush of pleasure he felt at her gentle touch… "UGH!" He hurled his glass into the fireplace. "Fucking shite!"
All he ever hoped was that the tentative friendship they formed would survive her transition into adulthood. It was highly likely that she would meet far more interesting and most certainly friendlier people, no doubt choosing to cast her former professor aside in their favor. But he hoped. He had so few friends, and none like her. Until her. Not that was ruined. Thanks to the Weasley girl's need to force her brother on Hermione, she would never speak to him again. He deserved it. Taking advantage of the girl while she was recovering from a very painful experience was something only the most depraved sort would do.
Like him.
In an instant, his rage turned to despair and settled about him like an old cloak. This he was used to. The Dark Lord was dead, but he still refused to forgive himself for his despicable actions in his youth. How could someone as beautiful, kind, and fundamentally good give him even a second glance? Grabbing the bottle this time, he dropped into his chair and stared morosely into the fire. It promised to be a long night.
Hermione, meanwhile, ran blindly through the corridors, choosing at random a pathway that would take her far from any of her fellow students. She had no desire to deal with any of them. In fact, she was tempted just to leave Hogwarts entirely and return to the Muggle world. How could she live in this world knowing that the man she loved would despise her thanks to Ginny's bloody love potion? Severus Snape was truly an extraordinary man, but he was also a man who resented losing control. When she kissed him, and what a kiss it was, she had few doubts in her mind that he was livid at her audacity. The glare he gave her while leaving the Infirmary hinted strongly to his disapproval.
"Dammit!" Disregarding the care she usually had for her possessions, the distraught Gryffindor hurled her backpack against the nearest wall. "Bloody fucking damnitall to HELL!" How could Ginny do this to her, her mind raged. What the hell was the girl thinking when she put that potion in her drink? Hermione shuddered to think about what would have happened if Ron had walked in before Severus. Images of her in Molly Weasley's place flooded her head.
It was her fault, she realized. She should have dated someone else, or better yet, never dated Ron. She could have found a way to get it through Ginny's head that she was not interested in the youngest male Weasley. The problem was that she honestly wanted to give Ron a chance. She thought maybe the others were right. Maybe the conflict between them was due to an unresolved attraction. Unfortunately, it took less than two weeks to figure out they were wrong. She did not lie when she said that even Harry was glad to see them break up. Everyone in Gryffindor Tower felt relieved, which is why it always confused her as to how they could think she wanted to be with him again. Did they just think she was too immature?
She sighed. Maybe she should have taken Dean up on his offer to Hogsmeade a few weeks ago. She shook her head. No. She would not have enjoyed herself and Ginny probably would have taken that as a sign of her desire for Ron. There was really nothing she could have done to prevent this, she thought. Not once Ginny got it in her head that Hermione and Ron belonged together. From that point forward, it was only a matter of time before the youngest Weasley hatched some daring plan to get her way.
Which led her back to Severus.
He was probably back in his rooms right now, plotting ways to punish her for her audacity. If he was over the shock, that is. It was highly unlikely that he expected his assistant to haul off and kiss him after experiencing one of the most painful moments of her young life. She could not help the smirk that came to her lips. At least she managed to surprise him.
Hermione wandered through a doorway and found herself in a beautiful garden. She had never been here before, nor heard of this place, but somehow she found herself wanting to stay. The stone bench was far softer than she expected, and she could see the small forms of silvery fishes swimming around the small pool in the center. Trees and bushes around the garden gave it the appearance of a grove, and a rainbow of flowers dotted the area, standing out amongst the lush green. She felt peaceful here. The anger simply drifted away and she relaxed for the first time in months. Relaxation turned to sleep, and the bushy haired girl curled up on the bench for a much needed rest.
While Hermione raged through the halls like a madwoman, Severus Snape raged silently in the dungeons like a drunkard. He knocked back glass after glass of Firewhisky, stopping only to block his Floo, enforce his wards, and cast a Silence Charm on the walls. He then proceeded to proclaim, in great detail, his feelings for the Head Girl of Hogwarts, safe in the knowledge that no one would ever hear his words. As he went deeper into his cups, the despair he felt surged to the surface and it was only the habit of years that kept him from sobbing into his drink.
It was that which immediately sobered him.
What the hell was he doing? Crying (nearly) over a mere chit of a girl who managed to pierce through his defenses in a matter of months when Albus Dumbledore had been trying for years? Why did it matter what she thought of him after the kiss? She did kiss him after all. Rationality returned and pointed out to him that even once she found out that she was under a love potion, she could in no way connect it to him. He smirked. The Weasley girl would probably have her hands full trying avoid getting hexed by the Head Girl. He made a mental note to turn a blind eye if it happened.
Severus staggered over to a cabinet and pulled out a Sobering Potion. A small sip cleared his mind enough for thought, but allowed him to remain soused enough to keep the pain distant. Years of practice had enabled him to know instinctively the correct dose. A wave of his hand cleared the mess of bottles from his floor, and another summoned his special brandy from its hiding place. If he was going to stay drunk, he was going to do it in style. The intoxicated wizard poured himself a small glass of the amber liquid, and then settled down by the fire to contemplate his future.
Were things different; if he had not ruined his life by swearing fealty to that psychotic madman who called himself a lord, this situation might actually have worked to his advantage. Any Slytherin worth his house would be able to use the experience to encourage further feelings of interest. Perhaps she would see him as something other than her professor, he thought. The idea was immediately discarded. Hermione Granger was many things, but foolish was not one of them. And it would be foolish of her to even contemplate viewing him as anything but her professor. But maybe once she graduated they could be friends, whispered the evil voice that liked to encourage him.
He snorted. Like a woman such as her would give him the time of day. She kissed you, replied the voice. She would have kissed Hagrid if he walked through the door first, he sneered. The voice was silent at that, apparently realizing the futility of its arguments. Oddly enough, the voice sounded a great deal like Remus Lupin – the only man in the Order who genuinely trusted him besides Dumbledore. Funny how that worked out.
Severus drank well into the evening, completely ignoring dinner in favor of his liquid nourishment. The brandy slowly lured him down into sleep, where a stunningly brilliant brunette with eyes of liquid bronze awaited him. Having no motivation to escape the dream and every desire to pursue it, the Slytherin released all restraints on his consciousness and sank into the darkness.
A short time later, Albus Dumbledore cracked through his wards and forced his way into the Potions master's quarters. One look at the unconscious man told him all he needed to know about the situation. This did not go the way he had hoped. That was unfortunate. He had honestly hoped the two scholars would bond on a level deeper than that of intellect. Severus would never admit it to anyone, but he had been looking for a woman like Hermione all his life. Lily Evans had come close, but she never even noticed the boy beyond a fellow student. He shook his head. Happiness was in his grasp, yet he stubbornly pushed it away as penance for deeds he more than made up for by his actions in the war.
The time had come for his self-hatred to stop.
A flick of the headmaster's wand levitated Severus a few feet off the floor, and another took him into his bedroom where the elderly wizard settled him into bed. Silently asking forgiveness for his intrusion, the elderly wizard entered the young man's mind to find out exactly what was going on. What he saw there surprised him. It appeared the Potions master was truly in love with the gifted young witch, but refused to see the love she bore for him.
Albus regretted the way he allowed things to occur, but he knew the two stubborn individuals would never have revealed their feelings for one another without external interference. It was a simple matter to allow the Weasley girl to spike Hermione's drink, and another to divert her brother so he would arrive too late. Not that it would have mattered, he saw. With the youthful witch already in love with Severus, she would never have been affected by the Admo Doulus potion. It was unexpected that he returned the feelings, thereby triggering the silent property of the aphrodisiac.
He could see Severus Snape was happily ensconced in dreams that led him to a fantasy Hermione who never rejected him and loved him with all her heart. His fear would prevent him from finding such happiness with the real woman, and if he allowed this to continue, the Wizarding world would be deprived of an extremely talented witch and, he feared, a brilliant Potions master as well. Severus already hated himself enough for his past deeds. The last thing he needed was the despair of thinking he drove the only woman he loved away from the magical world. The question was, thought Albus, what could he do to help this situation.
"Albus?"
The headmaster whirled at the sound of Minerva's voice. He gestured for silence.
"Oh dear. Is he alright?" That was his Minerva. Ever the worry wart. Even after the death of Voldemort she still viewed Severus as someone to be fiercely protected.
He led her out of the room. "He'll be fine, my dear. He is simply a bit… well oiled."
Comprehension lit her features. "Ah. I see. Dare I hope it was a celebration?"
"What is it that you need, Minerva?"
She did not miss that he avoided the question. "It's Hermione Granger, Albus. She's gone missing."
At that point, the headmaster's mind went on full alert. Missing? "What?"
"Mr. Potter reported to me a few minutes ago that they haven't seen Miss Granger since early this afternoon. Apparently they had some sort of fight, I didn't ask what, and she went storming off."
"Did Harry say what he found on the Maurader's Map?"
Minerva frowned. "Apparently, Miss Granger learned a spell to prevent the map from locating her. Harry believes she cast that shortly after she left."
Clever girl, he thought. "Have any of the other students seen her?"
"I haven't asked anyone besides her friends yet, Albus. I didn't want to alarm the students."
He nodded. "Yes. Of course. I will search for her, Minerva. Please inform Harry that he and his friends are forbidden from leaving the castle to search for her until we have more information."
"But Albus…"
"They will graduate in two weeks, Minerva. I refuse to tell them they cannot have a part in finding her, should it be necessary. I do not, however, think it will be. I suspect Miss Granger is still within these walls."
The Transfiguration professor heaved a sigh of relief. "I will tell them, Albus. Oh, and Mr. Malfoy has offered to take over her patrol tonight. Something about owing her."
"Hmmm. I suspect so." Albus shook his head at her questioning look. "I will explain later, my dear. First, I do believe I have a student to find. If you will excuse me…"
In a flash, the headmaster was gone, leaving Minerva to wonder what happened to drive the most responsible girl at Hogwarts away from her friends.
It was not terribly difficult for the headmaster to locate his wayward student. The castle informed him that the young woman stormed through the halls and somehow came to find the Tranquility Garden. She must have truly been upset for the elusive location to reveal itself to her. By the time he entered the flowery haven, it was deep in the night and well past curfew. Knowing, for the most part, what happened earlier that day, the headmaster was not inclined to punish the poor Gryffindor for being out too late.
Hermione was curled up on the soft stone bench near the Pool of Contemplation. Soft ringlets of chestnut silk curled about her peacefully sleeping face as her eyes fluttered lightly with her dreams. Again calling to the Powers at Be for pardon, Albus entered the girl's mind to find out what had driven her to such a state. What he found disturbed him. The words of the Weasley girl affected her friend far more than she could have expected. Each point was a dagger in the Head Girl's heart, confirming in her mind her unsuitability for the magical world. Hermione was a hairsbreadth away from leaving them forever, chased by the echoes of ridicule she experienced during the past seven years.
It pained the headmaster to realize how truly bad things had been for her. Albus marveled at the strength of the young woman, and silently reaffirmed his opinion that she would be far better suited to Severus than anyone he had ever met. She was strong, independent, and would not allow the Potions master to bully her in any way. She was also a Gryffindor, which meant she possessed the bravery to make the first move and continue the pursuit long after others would have given up. All she needed, really, was hope. Severus did not hate her by any means, but somehow in her mind she had become convinced that he would never want anything to do with her. Stubborn fools. Happiness was in their grasp if only it were not for the fear brought about by years of social ostracism.
Maybe he could change that.
Albus mentally scanned through all the charms and enchantments he learned over the years, looking for something useful to the two of them. A smile came to his face as he thought of the perfect spell. Gently touching the slumbering Gryffindor's head, he spoke softly. "Sominum partis!" A slivery glow briefly sparkled about her
Less than fifteen minutes later he had successfully performed the same procedure on Severus, and returned to his office to await the results. If he was lucky, things would solve themselves thanks to the nature of dreams. It was amazing what one could do with the freedom of unreality.