Author Note: Much love to Katt210 and Musical Medli for their support. You both keep these fingers employed! 😉
As seems to be the standard lately, bit of angst ahead…. We ARE getting close to the end people, I PROMISE! About another 10 chapters me thinks… Still a bit to happen to our friends...
Hope you stick around….
And now we continue with Prime and OC….. Will it go the way you hope?…. Will Prime get to show Orianna how he feels?
Well let's find out….
Chapter 99: Regret
Prime P.O.V
Orianna exhaled slowly and looked at the ground near her feet. She would not look at me. After what seemed an age, she at last whispered her admission. ''Because she took you away from me.''
I briefly closed my eyes as a sense of relief and euphoria flooded my systems. The smallest of gasps was torn from my lips at her confession, and her head snapped up sharply to meet my gaze at the sound. A palpable energy wrapped within a deafening silence filled the void between us.
''Is that what you think Orianna?'' my voice rumbled slowly, softly towards her as I took the smallest of steps in her direction, my eyes never leaving hers.
She scoffed as she wrapped her arms around herself and looked away, biting her lower lip. ''Oh, I don't think Optimus, I know she has.'' The wind tossed loose strands of hair about her face, sending them dancing. Her skin seemed to glow under the moonlight and those incredible brown and gold flecked eyes swum with tears as they fixed once more upon me - searching, warning, imploring.
I found myself exhaling a shaky breath as I stared at the woman before me. /So beautiful/. Beautiful in her raw, open, jealous need and pain. Beautiful in the prideful way she held herself together, refusing to utterly fall apart before me. Beautiful for every perfect imperfection she possessed. /Beautiful because she wanted me/.
I watched as her right hand twitched, as if reaching for me only to be stayed at the last moment, playing with the charm on her bracelet. Despite the hurt and pain of the woman that stood before me, a small smile spread across my lips as I chanced another step towards her, slowly closing the distance between us.
Before me Orianna frowned at my expression, no doubt annoyed by my reaction. She did not know I smiled because Olivia had been right in her observations and assumptions that day at the firing range. It would appear my Orianna never stopped loving me, she just thought I could never love her in return.
/How wrong she was! How wrong I was!/.
''Orianna.'' I almost whispered her name as I shook my head. ''In regard to Miss Winters and me, what you think and what is, are two very different things.''
She scowled at me, quickly swiping at a tear that tracked silently down her cheek. ''Don't patronize me Optimus!'' her words were harsh as a strange, painful grin spread across her lips and she raised a hand before her to point accusingly at me. ''I SAW you both together tonight at the restaurant. Don't tell ME…''
''You didn't give me a chance to TELL you anything Orianna!'' I interjected perhaps more tersely than I had intended as I took another small step towards her. ''To explain..''
''What's to explain Optimus?'' Exasperation permeated her tone as she took a step back away from me. Shaking her head, she began pacing back and forth in agitation. ''I told you I loved you and you turned me down because YOU told me a human and a Transformer should NOT have such feelings towards each other.'' She paused briefly almost expecting me to interrupt.
I refrained. Just.
She resumed pacing. ''Then, after you died,'' she faltered slightly in her steps and my spark ached for her, ''I swore I would rather have you in my life as a friend than not have you in my life at all!'' Painfilled eyes burned in my direction. ''So, I chose to start a relationship with Lennox to try and move on from you, because he actually loved me!''
She cast a pointed glance at me. ''Loved Optimus! Not just needed or desired!'' I narrowed my eyes though remained silent. As difficult as it was to bite my tongue, Orianna clearly needed to purge all these thoughts and feelings. So, I let her.
''Then what seemed five minutes after I start my relationship with Lennox,'' she resumed pacing, and her voice rang with sarcasm as she glared at me again as she gestured towards me, ''YOU suddenly decide, or magically come to the realisation, you CAN have romantic feelings towards a human woman now and fall in love with Olivia.'' She waved a hand dismissively, ''after months of shameless flirting that which culminated in your date tonight!''
She came to an abrupt stop; her hands coming to rest on her hips as her chest rose and fell rapidly. The fabric of her light, floral print dress fluttered about her thighs in the breeze. Her bottom lip quivered as she sent a steely gaze in my direction. ''There's your explanation! Did I leave anything out Optimus?'' She challenged.
I casually placed my hands in my pockets. ''No.'' I shook my head. ''I'd say that was fairly accurate summary Orianna.'' A triumphant smile began to spread across her lips. ''Except for the part about me loving Olivia.''
''Oh yeah?''Orianna erupted incredulously. ''In what way would th…''
''In that I do NOT love Olivia, Orianna.'' My words cut across hers, silencing her. ''I never did.''
Orianna's mouth dropped open as her hands slowly slipped from her hips and hung limply by her sides. A strangled sound came from her mouth 'Bu…but… You…that day at the firing range..''
''What about it?'' I challenged as I placed my hands on my hips.
Orianna's scowl deepened. ''You had a private meeting to tell Liv you loved her. She said as much herself.'' I could see the confusion and the shock on her face as she grappled with my wholly unexpected confession.
I shook my head. ''I held that meeting Orianna, to tell Miss Winters I did NOT love her as my actions may have mistakenly led her to believe.''
''Led HER to believe!'' Orianna growled, her expression turning from one of shock to anger. Her hands raked angrily through her long locks before coming to rest on her hips in a mirror image of my own stance. ''Led ME to believe more like it!''
She glared at me, her lips trembling as no doubt a slew of emotions tore through her. A moment later, she scoffed out loud and threw her hands in the air, shaking her head. ''Why?''
''What do you mean by ''why'' Orianna?'' I held her gaze.
''Why did you use Olivia to make me jealous?'' She folded her arms across her chest and glared almost contemptuously at me.
I took another step towards her, my eyes never leaving hers. ''Why did you feel jealous Orianna?''
Her eyes darted away from my own, the corners of her lips twitched, and she shifted her weight on her feet nervously. ''You didn't answer my question.''
''YOU are still with Major Lennox, are you not?'' I barked sharply. Orianna started and a small part of me felt mortified at my sudden change in tact. She hesitated a moment and I felt my spark pulse rapidly.
Almost imperceptibly, she nodded but did not meet my gaze. ''You just admitted you chose Major Lennox, Orianna.'' I could not help some bitterness from tainting my voice as I took another small step, coming to stand right before her. ''After you confessed you loved me, told me you wanted me above all others, you gave yourself to him.''
Orianna flinched, my words like a verbal slap.
My fists clenched by my sides as I glared down at her, vividly recalling that night I saw the marks on her neck. The marks that told me she had been claimed by another. I tried to quell the sudden rush of anger. ''Why should you then care whom I gave my attention to?'' I had not intended to share with her what hurt me so deeply, but the words found their own way to the surface.
''Because you couldn't love ME!'' She ground out through gritted teeth as she smacked her right palm hard against her chest. Her face contorted painfully. ''You could give your heart to Olivia easily enough, but NOT ME!'' Her eyes glistened with tears.
My expression softened as I looked at her.
''And… and it hurt to watch her take you away from me.'' She raised a hand and dabbed furiously at her eyes and nose as she sniffed.
''Oh, I know that feeling,'' I rumbled darkly as I stood before her.
Orianna looked away, fighting back a sob. Her breaths came in short, sharp gasps as she struggled to continue. ''It hurt. It hurt to know I was never… never good enough... for you!''
My arms shot out to pull her possessively against me. For a moment, Orianna struggled against me before she gave in, burrowing into me and clinging tightly to me. I felt hot, salty tears seep into my shirt, but I didn't care. The only thing that mattered in this moment was the simple fact she was in my arms. /Where she belonged – where she always should have been/.
I began to rock her slowly, soothingly from side to side, placing a strong hand on the back of her head and the small of her back as I pulled her towards me tighter still. I lay my head atop hers, drinking deeply, greedily of her unique scent. My spark hummed contentedly within me as it recognised and was finally sated with the immediate presence of the one it sought above all others. The one it longed to be united with. ''Oh, my Orianna.'' I rumbled softly as she clung to me tightly. ''Nothing could be further from the truth!''
Her muffled sobs were swallowed by the fabric of my shirt as she pressed her face firmly against my chest. I was suddenly struck by the odd and hurtful thought of how many times I had been the one to bring the precious soul in my arms to tears on this very beach. Tears of happiness, joy and it would seem, utter heartbreak. She'd shed them all for me, because of me – right here.
A regretful sigh escaped my lips as I lowered my head and kissed the top of her head. My deep voice rumbled against the crown of black and red locks, cracking slightly with emotion. ''My dearest Orianna. You cannot take someone away who has no desire to be taken.''
She gasped out loud and snapped her head up towards my face as my words sunk in. I brought both hands up to clasp either side of her beautiful face. A fond smile played on my lips, as my fingers gently stroked her cheeks, and I gazed down at her. Her eyes widened in shock and elation as she returned my stare.
I brushed a strand of hair from her face as I leaned forward to place a gentle, chaste kiss on her forehead. She hissed softly at the contact, her hands wrapping tightly around my wrists, not stopping me, but rather anchoring me to her. I obliged, my kiss lingering. I closed my eyes tightly. Just the feel of her skin against my lips sent a wave of warmth spreading throughout my body, causing every nerve receptor to tingle pleasurably at the contact. /Primus, how I have missed this woman!/.
Reluctantly, I pulled away from her, looking her in the eye. Tears welled within their golden-brown depths, but she smiled up at me through them, her hands still wrapped tightly around my wrists. I shook my head in silent admonishment of my actions. /How could you have been so blind? So callous in your actions../. I simply stared at her for a long moment, wrestling with my own thoughts.
''Optimus?'' Orianna's fingers brushed against my wrist, her brow creased in confusion and concern as her eyes swept over my face. ''What is it?''
As a Prime I was honour bound by my own set of moral codes and a duty to act as a pillar of honesty, integrity and selflessness. I could not knowingly and actively come between Orianna and Major Lennox. /Primus knows I have come close enough to doing so already!/. I narrowed my eyes and clenched my jaw as I fought my own frustrations.
''Optimus?'' Orianna released my wrists, a hand reaching out to brush tentatively against my cheek. ''I know that look. Talk to me, please.'' She smiled warmly up at me. ''Like we used to.''
''Like we used to?'' I chuckled softly as I removed her hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. ''Even for a Transformer such as I, that seems a lifetime ago Orianna.''
She stared at her hand in mine, a distant look in her eyes as no doubt she too recalled such memories between us. A hopeful smile spread across her lips. ''Perhaps Optimus. But there is no reason why we cannot have that again. Is there?''
She looked at me with such care, concern, and hope. In that moment I made a choice - one for myself. I gave a loud protracted sigh and stepped out of her reach, trying hard to ignore the look on her face as I stepped several paces away from her.
'''But what if I don't want things to go back to the way they were before?'' Folding my arms across my chest, I looked out over the gentle lapping waves. A nervous anticipation building within me.
There was silence.
I turned back to face her. Orianna's mouth hung partially open as if she were screaming silently, her eyes swept rapidly over my figure, blinking furiously. ''Bu...'' Her mouth trembled, and her voice quavered. ''But why not?''
I held her gaze steadily. ''Orianna, have you ever made the wrong decision about something and regretted it?''