Chapter 6: Hurt

Botan's POV

I had promised not to let anyone worry about me, but I couldn't keep that promise. Today, is April the third, the day of the party at Genkai's temple. I'm afraid to face Kurama after the incident, yet I knew that my absence would only increase his concern. I must go and just act natural. I just have to talk and smile. Time seems to be moving fast when your mind is occupied. It's already 5:30 in the afternoon, so I should get ready. I walked over to my closet, and open the wooden door. I took out a knee-length, beige sleeveless dress with prints of green thorn vines, wrapping from the top left shoulder straight down, decorating the bottom edge of the dress. I thought it was an unusual design and it caught my eyes the moment I entered the shop two weeks ago. I tied my baby blue hair in a high ponytail and hopped on my oar, soaring toward Genkai's temple. The damp breeze, tickling my skin refreshed me. 'Botan, you can do this. After today, your life will be back to normal. The past will only be the past.' I am about a mile away from Genkai's temple, when I caught sight of a redhead and instantly I knew who it was. 'Wow! Great timing.' I need to straighten things out with Kurama before I reach the temple, so that the others won't be suspicious.' I swooped down behind a huge tree and landed. 'Okay, here I go.'

I put on my most genuine smile and shouted, "hello, Kurama."

Kurama halted his steps and turned to face me. "Good afternoon, Botan,' he had greeted me, but his voice seems weak, he wasn't in high spirit. I didn't question him because I knew all too well that he was still worried about me, especially after my little impulsive escape. Not to mention shattering his window as if I was a scared cat, trying to escape a mad dog. "Botan, I'm…"

"I'm sorry, Kurama." I had cut him off and apologized before he can. "I didn't mean to offend you, but what happened the other day was unexpected. Everything just seemed to crash that moment and I couldn't control myself. Sorry about your window. I hope you can forgive me."

"No, I should be the one to apologize not you, Botan. I should have been more considerate to you request and not invade your personal space. I'm sorry for my careless action and I hope you won't take the past incident into heart."

"Of course not. We are friends, Kurama. I know you care about me. It's just that there are some things that I would like to handle myself. Since we are fine now, would you like to walk with me to Genkai's temple?"

"The pleasure is mine."

I walked with Kurama, while asking him about his classes, his mother and anything else that doesn't remind him of my problem. He answered in a friendly manner, but a prick in the back of my mind told me that Kurama was not completely satisfied with my explanation about the incident. However, if he had promised not to question me, I know he will keep his promise. Finally, we had reached the temple and I could already hear Yusuke and Kuwabara arguing.

Kurama's POV

I had accompanied Botan to Genkai's temple and when we reached the stairs, I could hear Yusuke and Kuwabara arguing. I heard a soft giggle from Botan and the words "those two will never change," escaped her lips. At the moment, Botan seems so carefree, but I know that such expression is a means to hide her inner emotions. I did not believer her explanation earlier, but I did not want to impose on her personal space. I know that when she's ready, she will open up. I believe that it's best for time to take its toll instead of risking our friendship. As we reached the entrance, I could see Yusuke, grabbing a hold of Kuwabara's shirt and lightening were charging in their eyes. Botan had a sweat drop forming on the back of her head.

"Yusuke, this is a party not a battle ground," Botan shouted. Both Yusuke and Kuwabara broke off, huffing with arms crossed above their chest and backs facing one another. Botan sighed, "it's only seven and they are already at it. I have a feeling it's going to be a long night."

"Good evening, Yusuke and Kuwabara. I see you two are well and energized."

"Shut it, foxboy," Yusuke spat. Keiko walked over and gave him a punch on top of his head. "Don't be rude, Yusuke." "Come on in Kurama and don't mind Yusuke."

"Thank you, Keiko. Don't concern yourself about me. Just continue on with your task. I will be fine."

"Ok, Kurama." Keiko turned around to see Botan, "Botan! You look nice today. Is that a new dress?"

"Thanks, Keiko. Yeah, I liked it the moment I saw it."

Upon Keiko's words I glanced at Botan and finally realized that she was indeed in different attire from her usual jeans and jacket. 'Green thorn vines as a decoration for the beige dress? Interesting.' I was so occupied with the incident that I failed to notice before. 'She does look beautiful in that dress.' I was startled by my own thought. Many girls have taken interest in my appearance, but when have I taken a girl's appearance into thought? 'Never until now or maybe, it's just due to the fact that I have been concern with her emotional stability.' I released those thoughts and noticed Hiei in the corner, looking bored.

"Having fun are we?"

"I suggest you not mess with me, kitsune. This party is a waste of important training time and a fight might just be satisfying right now."

"Well, no threats nor force was inflicted in order to gain you presence, Hiei. Just enjoy the party, now that you've chosen to appear."

"Hn."

Hiei might appear cold externally, but internally he has accepted these people as his friend. He's just not the show-and-tell type of demon.

This party is actually just a social gathering between good friends with some food and a few games. Keiko just brought out a tray of chocolate chip cookies, which Yusuke and Kuwabara are busy devouring as if they had been starved for decades. Keiko and Botan are both talking and laughing. Yukina and Shizuru are having a friendly conversation. The tray of cookies quickly disappeared, leaving a single cookie left. Both Yusuke and Kuwabara had one foot on the table, ready to wrestle for that last cookie.

"I saw it first, Kuwabara."

"Says who? That's my cookie, Uremeshi."

"It's mine, stupid."

"No, it's mine, idiot."

"No, mine, moron."

Both already had their fist up in the air with lightening clashing around their figure. At the moment, Botan decided to step in. "Now, now, boys. Stop acting so childish. It's just one cookie."

"Shut up, Botan. This is between that moron and me."

"Yusuke, don't be rude," shouted Keiko.

"Yeah, Uremeshi. Don't talk to girls that way."

"Don't change the topic, Kuwabara. It's obvious that this last cookie is mine."

"What to bet. I'll fight you for it and beat you to a pulp."

"Yeah, right, you don't even know what a pulp is, Kuwabara."

"That's it, let's take this outside, Uremeshi."

"Boys!" Botan shouted, clearly irritated. "Quit acting like babies over one stupid cookie."

"Shut up, you aren't needed here, Botan."

With Yusuke's words, the entire atmosphere changed. Botan grew quiet, allowing her bangs to cover her eyes, but the air around her grew dark and depressed. I was uncertain of the reason, but I knew everyone could feel the unpleasantness because the entire room became silent. Keiko marched up to Yusuke and banged him on the head, "Yusuke, you idiot!"

"Hey, quit that, Keiko."

Keiko started to walk toward Botan, "Botan, don't mind Yusuke, he doesn't mean it. Botan?" Botan didn't respond nor did she move from her spot. I could sense that she was truly hurt by Yusuke's words, but I'm not sure why. Keiko placed a hand on Botan's shoulder, but Botan shrugged it off.

"Sorry, guys. I need some fresh air," she managed to weakly whisper. With that she turned toward the door and slowly walked out.

I had sensed her depression and I had the urge to walk up and embrace her from behind. To be her shoulder to cry on, to be the person to listen to her problems, but I did not act according to my thoughts. All I could do was watch her shadow, slowing fading from sight.

Botan's POV

When Yusuke told me that I wasn't need; the memories of the past drowned me in deep despair and sorrow. I saw images of him killing, blood splattering every direction, his eyes filled with bloodlust was chasing after me, haunting me. I realized that even after today, I could never escape my past. It will always haunt me, whether in reality or in my dreams. As I got a great distance beyond the temple, I began to sprint. Tears flowing endlessly down my cheeks. I didn't want to feel this pain, and I didn't want to think about the past, but why. This party was supposed to help me forget the past, but why did Yusuke have to say those words. 'Those exact same words he said before he killed me.' I was torn, blinded by despair. Pictures, images caused me to relive that moment when the knife punctured my heart. I died physically and emotionally; never shall I trust anyone with all my heart. Betrayal, I've learned the true meaning of that word on that day of April the third. I kept running until my legs gave up, and I tripped and slid across the field of grass. I buried my face and cried with all my heart.

"Well, well, well, what a pleasant surprise?" I heard a voice say, so I slowly looked up into a pair of sky blue eyes.

"You!"

I'm sorry my loyal reviewers. I know I took so long to update, but I had finals, volunteer work, and a part-time job to worry about. And recently I just bought Karaoke Revolution Party and got very addicted to it so please forgive me. Now that it's summer I will be able to update more frequently, and plus I really want to finish this fic and start another one. Yeah, I'm mean to leave it hanging, but I plan to update soon anyways so don't worry. It will be kind of slow, but after secrets are revealed, things will get more exciting. Anyways, please continue to review and stay toon!

MiaHime