A/N: There is no excuse out there good enough to give you for the 7 month hiatus, so I won't even bother trying to think of one. Yes, I am still alive, still sane (fairly) and still writing (some things more than others). Jesus tap-dancing Christ, I can't believe it's been over half a year since I posted the last chapter. I am SO SO SO SO SO sorry for making you all wait this long! The good news is, I'm in the middle of the next chapter right now, so you can definitely expect it really soon, like within a week. Also, I have a feeling that Leera's going to have her baby very soon, possibly within the next 2-3 chapters. That's not a promise, though. This story writes itself sometimes, so it may try to lead us all somewhere else first. I CAN promise you all that I am working really hard to bring you the next couple of chapters, because I can't wait for the baby to arrive either! Anyway, pleasepleaseplease review! You have no idea how much reviews mean to me and how much they help me continue with the story! P.S. please forgive my hideous attempt at writing in Hamsterveil. I tried to make him sound authentic, and almost killed myself in the process. I salute the Lilo & Stitch writers for their incredible efforts that I could never match. XP

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO:
IF YOU WANT IT BAD ENOUGH

Gantu walked slowly back to his ship, thinking about his reunion with Leera that morning. He had often wondered what had become of her after they had gone their separate ways some years before. One could never forget such a vibrant young woman as Leera, though there were some memories of her he would rather have forgotten. The image of her lying bruised and bloodied on that oasis on Naa continued to haunt him.

He remembered visiting her in the hospital two days after; how much better she looked, how much better she seemed to be doing, yet, somehow… so much worse. Lying there looking so frail, eye staring blankly into space, words barely more than a whisper when she spoke to him. And so beautiful, he'd noticed. So beautiful and so broken. He'd wondered with a brief flash of rage how anyone could spoil such beauty.

Despite the painful memories, the prospect of seeing Leera again was a happy one; Gantu had to resist the urge to skip all the way back to his ship. The two experiments he'd been after that morning were long gone and forgotten. Not that he even cared. After seeing Leera that morning, he felt as though he'd just captured all the experiments in one giant net. Upon entering the ship, a quick glimpse of 625 working on a sandwich made him wonder why he'd even bothered with a single one of Jumba's little abominations.

Through a mouthful of PB and J, 625 reminded him: "'Bout time ya got in, Fish Face. Hamsterwheel's been chewing my ear off for the past half hour!"

"That's Hamsterveil, you sniveling yellow fuzz ball!"

At the sound of his boss's voice over the intercom , Gantu's heart dropped into his stomach. "Blitznak," he murmured before composing himself and taking a seat before the communications consol. Burning red eyes and a wiggling nose glared down on him from a screen half his height.

"I should be looking at an experiment right now and not the pathetic face of failure that belongs to the biggest failure that failure has ever known that is sitting before me looking like he has failed again!" Hamsterveil shouted at Gantu who, instead of flinching at his needle-sharp words, was absorbing it like an indifferent sponge. At his lack of shame, Hamsterveil fumed.

"Why are you not hanging your head in shame, you shameful shark-like thing, you? I would fire you right now if I weren't needing those mighty muscles of yours for much more evil-doing than I alone can handle!"

It wasn't going to be easy for Hamsterveil to bring Gantu down from his Cloud Nine, but something in the rodent's words made him wary. He leaned forward in his seat, meeting those beady red eyes with an icy blue glare.

"I don't care if you fire me or not," Gantu growled. "In fact, I've got a good mind to quit! You need me a lot more than I need you! Get your own muscle and do your own dirty work from now on."

"Why you despicable--" Hamsterveil started, but Gantu wasn't listening anymore. He stood up, feigning a good stretch and yawn, before heading toward the kitchen area where 625 was now constructing a second sandwich.

"The day Gantu stands up to Hamsterweel," the experiment mused, looking first at Gantu then at his sandwich. "This day is going down in history, right along with this octuple-decker-Dagwood-deluxe!"

Hamsterveil was still chittering angrily away as Gantu made himself a small tuna sandwich and took it back to his seat to eat right in front of his irate boss.

"--- so far up there that you will never again be seeing the light of day! How does that sound, you halibut-headed cretin?"

Without looking up, Gantu said, "Do you mind? Your constant squawking is giving me indigestion."

"I'll be giving you far more than that when I get to Earth, so commence to quivering in fear, you incompetent blubber brain!"

Gantu choked on a bite of his sandwich. "W-what? You're coming to Earth? When --"

"If you had been listening with that fat-filled hull of a head of yours, you would have heard me saying how deviously my devious plans for hostile takeover of the galaxy have been recently extended to include that backwater chunk of worthless rock underneath your gargantuan hiney!"

Gantu stared up at the screen. "Oh. Is that all?" he asked, smiling. "For a moment there I thought you were actually making a threat!"

"That WAS a threat, you stupidly ignorant ignoramus!" Hamsterveil shouted, hopping up and down in his fury. He then calmed down very quickly and spoke to Gantu in a quiet, even tone. "I am coming to Earth, and I am bringing with me my new partner who is so evil he makes evil look like a little sissy girl with blonde pigtails and little pink ribbons skipping down the street to visit her poor, sick granny while stopping to sniff all the pretty flowers along the way!"

Gantu groaned and rolled his eyes. In the time it took for Hamsterveil to say something simple like "What's up?" 625 could have cooked and eaten five grilled cheese sandwiches. Speaking of which, Gantu realized he was still hungry. That tuna sandwich was the only thing he'd eaten today. Wonder if I could bully the little trog into making me a Reuben…

"… and now, without further adieu… adieu meaning any further interruptions from your gaping gully of a mouth… I introduce with great pleasure my newest and most evilest partner in evil!"

Gantu watched as Hamsterveil's image flickered out and was replaced by a gleaming black eye, like a knife slit in a scarred, crimson face. The image zoomed out to reveal more and more of Hamsterveil's new partner. As the full face came into view, Gantu saw that there was only the one eye; the other one having been gouged out so that the sealed eyelids sunk into an empty socket. On top of a bald head sat the remains of two sets of antlers, now broken and mangled. Gantu's heart lurched and a loud gasp escaped his throat. In response, the flat, russet and ravaged face cracked into the most horrendous imitation of a smile, revealing a set of jagged, razor-like teeth.

"Long time no see, Captain Gantu." Words were coming out of the fearsome mouth, but Gantu could barely hear them over the agonized screaming of reason in his own head.

"No… you're dead…"

The mouth cracked wider in a laugh and the gleam of teeth that could tear through flesh and bone blinded Gantu like a deer caught in headlights.

"You can't kill the devil, now, can you?" The voice did not belong to that face, could not possibly have come from that mouth. It was too warn, too genial. It was the voice of an angel. And it chilled Gantu down to his very soul.

"But, but how? The explosion… it's not possible!"

"Oh but it is, my dear fellow. Anything is possible… if you want it bad enough."

"But…"

"Enough with the butting in of your buts, Gantu!" Hamsterveil's voice squealed from the intercom, just before he reappeared on the screen. "We have no time for your puny words with no meaning. We are making preparations to invade Earth, and we will commence to invade in a matter of weeks. So stay put and enjoy your picturesque island paradise while it still exists." Hamsterveil pulled his cape up to conceal half his face in the melodramatic style of a theater villain. "We will keep in touch." And with that, the screen went black.

Gantu continued to stare at the dark screen. It just can't be! It's impossible! No. No…

"So Hamsterwheel's got himself a new buddy and you don't need to hunt experiments anymore because the earth and everything on it is going to be obliterated." Still stunned, Gantu turned slowly to see 625 coming out of the kitchen with two large sandwiches. He offered one to Gantu, who shook his head slowly.

"Wow, and I get two Reubens! Everyone wins!" He opened his mouth wide to take a bite, but the look on Gantu's face squelched his appetite. "Hey there, Gan Man, why the long face? That tuna sandwich disagreeing with ya? You know you used WAY too much relish in it, and ya know what relish does to ya."

Gantu slowly snapped out of his daze and looked down at 625 gorging himself. He suddenly became enraged.

"This entire planet is about to be destroyed by the most wanted criminal in the history of the universe and all you can think about is food? BLITZNAK!" He slammed his fist down on the consol with such force that that 625 jumped back with a sudden flash of fear in his eyes.

"It's called coping, Blubber Butt. You rant and cuss and punch things, I eat. It's a helluva lot better than dwelling on the inevitable." 625 said this so matter-of-factly that one would have mistook it for bravery, but as Gantu was glaring right at him, he could not miss the fear and worry so apparent in his eyes.

Gantu sighed. "I don't want to dwell on it either, but it's not inevitable. There just has to be a way to stop them…" he trailed off, eyes drifting around the room as though the answer lay somewhere nearby.

"Who the heck was that creep, anyway?" asked 625. "He's so ugly he makes my vomit look appetizing."

Gantu made a disgusted face. "He didn't look familiar to you? The whole galaxy knows that face. He's been on the news and so many wanted posters…"

"Well I didn't exactly have full cable hookups or a newspaper subscription when I was dehydrated in a tiny pod for several years. So bring me up to date already!"

Gantu sighed again, turning away. "That man was responsible for a terrorist movement against the Federation and one of the worst wars this galaxy has ever seen. He's a monster. A demon. He's…" Gantu shuddered, squeezing his eyes shut and shaking his head. When he opened them again, there was a gleam in them of the utmost rage, and when he spoke, it was in a low, deep growl that stank of hatred. "Horsthar Le'Kruune."