New story posted! Fate Stay Night / Vox Machina.

Chapter 7

Shirou moved cautiously around the tombstones.

When Aqua had approached him earlier that day, wanting to level up, fighting the undead hadn't been what he had in mind.

"Yeesh, you can tone down the drama, Shirou," Aqua said. Skipping leisurely along, the rest of the party following in her wake.

"The undead won't come out until after dark, and besides, they'll be no problem for me to take out!"

He hoped Aqua wasn't overestimating her abilities or underestimating the threat an undead enemy could pose. Shirou had limited experience with the undead, but he heard stories. Tales of young Apostles, slaughtering entire towns and they were the least dangerous kind of undead. An Apostle Ancestor, they were so dangerous no one could stop them. They did as they pleased, ruling vast territories. All-in-all, Shirou felt his approach to the situation contained an adequate amount of drama. Thank you very much.

Ignoring the chattering behind him, Shirou continued to scan his surroundings. Spotting a few footprints, Shirou knelt beside them and let his fingers ghost over the disturbed earth.

"Hey man, what do you see?" Kazuma asked, peering over Shirou's shoulder.

Shirou cleared his throat with an awkward cough.

"No idea. I just remember seeing people do this in movies."

There was a pause.

"Let's go before the others get too far ahead."

Apparently, Kazuma didn't feel the need to acknowledge Shirou's faux pas.

He could live with that.

Mapping out the rest of the graveyard didn't take long, and they saw no sign of the undead.

Shirou led everyone to a hill outside the graveyard and lit a fire as the sun descended below the horizon. It would be a good hour before it became dark, and everyone could use a snack to help keep them awake. A smile on his face, Shirou traced a few cooking utensils.

Shirou noticed Megumin staring at him with a strange amount of focus.

Shirou shifted and bumped into Darkness. She had been oddly clingy since joining the party and insisted on training at least once daily. Shirou obliged, impressed by her dedication but worried by her lack of progress. Nobody could deny that Darkness could take a hit and had plenty of stamina, but her swordsmanship proved as appalling as ever.

Shirou scratched his chin.

'Maybe I started her sparing too soon.'

Megumin continued staring.

"Err, Megumin, are you alright?"

Megumin's eyes narrowed as she pulled the brim of her hat down

"Why didn't you tell me you knew Explosion magic? I've not questioned you all week, but since we have time, I want to know everything about my rival."

Rival?

Alas, Megumin's question interested everyone, and they all looked at him with eager eyes.

Shirou shrugged, a helpless gesture that satisfied no one based on the frowns directed at him.

"It's not like I meant to keep it a secret. The subject never came up."

Kazuma grumbled under his breath.

"I'm going to guess because no one thought it would be possible to pull an explosive arrow out of their ass."

Shirou coughed. Rin had a habit of saying Shirou was 'hax,' whatever that meant.

"Well, you know I can summon magical swords with different effects. Caladbolg II, what I used to blow up the Griffin and Manticore, is a changed version of the weapon wielded by Fergus Mac Roich. When I traced it, I overloaded it with mana, making it unstable, amplifying its already explosive effects."

"You must have a lot of magic." Darkness said, finger resting on her chin. "You created an explosion that far exceeded what Megumin can cast —" Megumin whined like a kicked puppy. " — and had no problem moving afterward."

Before Shirou could launch into an explanation, something in the distance caught his attention. It looked like a glowing balloon ascending from the graveyard.

Seeing his attention shift, Aqua stood and raised her fist.

"It—" Aqua took a deep breath before releasing it slowly. "—It is time."

More severe than Shirou had ever seen her, Aqua stalked down toward the graveyard, back straight and shoulders set. Once more, walking among the tombstone, the group followed Aqua, who moved like a bloodhound, honing in on the source of dark power.

As a precaution, Shirou kept his eye peeled and found a weapon in his armory to give him the most significant advantage.

A single-handed sword appeared in his hand. The comforting weight of steel felt reassuring, and the glow cast by the orange gem in the pummel was enough to pierce the nearby shadows.

"OH, that's much nicer, Shirou," Megumin said, sticking close to his back.

Megumin had been reluctant to take this quest, not because she feared the undead - nonsense! - But because of its proximity to town.

No Explosions allowed!

She could not use her only spell, which made her ill at ease. Understandable.

"Hey, guys, over there," Kazuma said, keeping his voice soft as possible to not draw attention.

Falling his finger, Shirou saw a figure, maybe 30 meters away, walking in the same direction they were walking, seeming not to notice them.

"Do you think that's who we're after?"

Aqua didn't wait to find out.

"Turn undead!"

At Aqua's command, a glowing blue-white magical circle formed under the walking figure, illuminating him in his ghastly glory. Rotting flesh, contained within frayed dirt-stained robes, revealed its existence as a zombie, who, now exposed to Aqua's holy magic, let out a moan before fading away. As the flesh vanished, another white orb of energy formed and began its lazy journey skyward.

"We're close," Aqua said, eyes narrow and intense as she stood with her hand still extended.

"We must continue and lay these troubled souls to rest among the heavens."

Shirou decided he liked this Aqua. He had never had a problem with her before, but anyone would agree she could sometimes be ditzy and perhaps unmotivated.

Tonight, Aqua proved she was none of those things.

It made sense. Aqua had gotten trapped in the human realm, but as a goddess, he could understand her aversion to those who escape the world's natural order. The undead was the anathema to what the gods had created, and Aqua seemed ready to right that wrong.

"There they are."

Indeed, Aqua spoke the truth as they saw more and more souls filling the air.

"Something seems off about this," Kazuma said. "Why would a zombie maker be purifying souls?"

Darkness hummed and pulled at a purple amulet from under her armor.

"I will admit to wondering the same, plus the numbers seem odd to me. Priests living in Axle often purify such places so that so many souls are ascending shouldn't be possible."

Darkness and Kazuma's observation were enough for Shirou to re-evaluate. Jogging towards Aqua, he grabbed her shoulder and pulled her back.

"Let's be cautious moving up and see what's going on before we charge in."

Aqua looked mutinous, but allowed herself to be pulled back behind a towering grave marker covered in intricate carvings of Celtic designs.

"What is it already? Let me at those undead, gosh darn it!"

"Kazuma and Darkness noticed something strange, and I think someone might have beaten us to the punch."

Aqua's eyes widened, and a whimper escaped her lips. She needed this quest and the reward for completing it.

Payments on her tab started tomorrow, and if she didn't finish this quest, she'd have to get a part-time job!

Unacceptable!

"I can't let someone complete this quest first!" Aqua tore herself from Shirou's hold and scampered to the swarm of undead, attacking them from behind.

"Turn undead."

Moans and sighs came from long dead throats.

"Turn undead."

The white lights drifting upward soon doubled in number.

"Dammit, Aqua!" Kazuma said, joining the rest of the party as they ran to catch up with the desperate goddess

"Turn un—Hey!"

Aqua stopped casting, and Shirou picked up the speed, grateful that the zombies didn't seem interested in stopping him.

Skidding to a stop beside a perturbed Aqua, Shirou brought his sword to bear, feeding it mana until pale white flames emitted from the shining steel.

"Ah, perfect timing, Shirou. I've found who's been purifying all the zombies, filthy quest-stealer." Aqua crossed her arms and cocked a hip. "Tell her this is my quest, and I don't need any help."

Shirou said nothing as he evaluated the black-cloaked figure before him. The cloak was voluminous, with a hood drawn up, hiding any discerning features, until pale hands reached up and unclasped the article of clothing.

Long brown locks fell in a chocolate wave down a deep purple robe that did nothing to hide the woman's voluptuous figure.

Shirou swallowed, and he could hear Kazuma muttering something like 'homina' followed by an 'ouch.' as Megumin used her staff to rap him in the head.

The woman straightened her spine and tried to look down at Shirou.

She failed

Not only did she stand several inches shorter than he, but the attempted look of superiority lost its impact because of her trembling lips.

"G-greetings, h-humans. Have you come to face m-me, the great Wiz, Ice Witch of the North!"

'... The Ice Witch of the North.'

Kazuma had a bad feeling. He couldn't name the sentiment, but a badass title never meant anything good for the brave heroes' plans.

Or dumb schmucks winging it.

" — I w-will admit I did not expect anyone to figure out my d-dastardly plot so soon."

Dastardly plot? Kazuma thought she had been releasing the souls of the dead, not what he thought of as evil.

Darkness, who had moved to stand beside Shirou, vocalized Kazuma's unspoken question.

"You mean to say you've been assisting these lost souls to pass on to the next life for less than altruistic reasons?"

Wiz fretted with her hands and shifted her weight back and forth.

"That's right! I, Wiz, the evilest and most powerful of liches, have n-now deprived you of these lost souls through which you fuel your zombie labor f-force."

Huh?

"Axle has a zombie workforce?"

Megumin furrowed her brow and shook her head.

"No, zombies make for terrible workers. They are slower than sloths and lazier than you, plus they smell awful."

"I am not lazy! I prefer to work smarter, is all."

The call of lazy bastards everywhere.

"W-wait, you really don't have a zombie labor force."

"Nope."

Wiz slumped to her knees, defeated.

"Gosh darn it."

Kazuma grasped his chest. How could a lich be so adorable? She looked like a puppy, an undead big-tittied puppy.

Aqua didn't feel the same way. So instead, she made her feelings known by tossing her hair back and cackling.

"What kind of lich are you, stupid? Of course, humans don't use zombies. Only stupid smelly liches with no friends have to resort to such things."

Critical hit!

Wiz's legs gave out, and she hugged her knees to her chest, big tears forming in her eyes.

She sniffled.

"I'm never going to become one of the Demon King's generals now. Mother was right. I really am worthless."

Kazuma lunged forward and slapped his hand over Aqua's mouth a second after Shirou's own choked off the laughing goddess.

"Really, Aqua, that behavior is inappropriate." Darkness said from beside Wiz.

"Yeah, what Darkness said. Can't you see she's trying really hard? It appeals to my Crimson Demon blood!"

Kazuma didn't turn to look, but he knew Megumin adopted some ridiculous pose.

Aqua shook her head, blue hair flying as she did, to get Kazuma and Shirou to let go of her and cross her arms with a huff.

"She's just a lich, and besides, she'll vanish soon, anyway." Multi-colored power erupted from Aqua's hand, and her eyes glowed with an inner fire. "As a goddess, I can not let such a creature live on!"

Darkness stood tall and unintimidated.

"Aqua, that is enough. I have ignored you pretending to be a goddess, as I did not believe it hurt anyone, but it must end here."

Aqua's magic stuttered and snuffed itself.

"W-what do you mean p-pretend?! I am a goddess! Look at me, the blue hair, the beauty, my name! I'm the goddess—"

Kazuma clapped his hand over Aqua's mouth again.

"So sorry about her. She's always been delusional." Kazuma laughed, a forced uncomfortable sound, as Wiz looked nervous then terrified during Aqua's spiel. "But she won't let her hurt you, right Shirou?"

Shirou graced Wiz with a kind smile and knelt before her, planting his sword on the ground like a knight of old.

"You have my word, dear lady."

Since when did Shirou speak like an Englishman?

Wiz looked wide-eyed from Shirou to the sword in front of him before tensing as lines of terror and awe appeared on her face.

"Is that the sword known as Dawnbreaker? The light against the darkest darkness and bane of the undead. The evilest sword to have ever existed!"

Goddamn Shirou and his badass swords!

Wiz scrambled back to her knees before falling into a bow so deep her head rested on the soft grass.

"P-please, m-my m-master, as an aspect of evil incarnate, please assist this lowly lich in becoming as wicked as yourself!"

Kazuma knew he should feel concerned. Wiz declared she wanted to learn to be evil... but kneeling in seiza as she did, Kazuma almost melted. That and the look on Shirou's face, something between horror and pride, made the situation adorable and hilarious.

"I... that is... this sword isn't... I'm not sure I can teach you how to be evil. It would—"

"Please! Please don't say it's impossible. That's what my mom always says, that it's impossible for me to be evil." Wiz looked up, and hope glittered in her eyes like stars. "I'm sorry I didn't realize it sooner, but for you a being so evil to wield Dawnbreaker and to have a priestess and a crusader as slaves in your party, I know you can help me."

Slaves? Aqua wrestled with Kazuma mutinously, and Darkness blushed crimson.

Regardless of the slave designation flying about, Kazuma decided then and there that he would not regret choosing evil for this woman or being enslaved to Shirou.

Needless to say, Shirou didn't stand a chance.

Reaching out tentatively, Shirou laid a hand on Wiz's head, causing her to freeze.

"I'll do my best to help you."

The expression that came over Wiz's face could only be called angelic, and as she clasped her hands before her bosom in prayer.

"Thank you, my most vile prince. I shall be your most dedicated apprentice and learn all you have to teach, so I may one day rule this world!"

Kazuma thought he should feel jealous that Shirou had another beautiful woman who wanted to be trained by him, but she was so wholesome he could only wipe a tear from his eye and cheer her on.

"Congratulations, Wiz!"

Aqua exploited Kazuma's distracted state to elbow him in the stomach and escape his hold.

"Shirouuuu! You can't agree to help a lich."

Shirou rose and turned to face Aqua with a straight spine. Wiz gripped his shirt to better hide behind him.

"Aqua, we are here to help others, lift them, and allow them to live their dreams. Wiz has asked for my help, so I shall show her the true path of evil. Muahahaha!"

Wiz looked up at Shirou, her face flushed.

"Such an amazing evil laugh. I have so much to learn."

'Dear god - other than Aqua - thank you for letting me behold such a beautiful soul, even if she's a ditzy idiot.'

Aqua stomped down the steps of the Inn. She wanted to make sure everyone knew about her displeasure. Not only had Shirou taken in a lich, but they also hadn't completed the quest!

That meant Aqua still didn't have any money!

Aqua found she didn't care to be broke. Did not care for it at all.

Ignoring Kazuma and Megumin, who were waiting for her in the lobby, Aqua stuck her nose in the air and walked toward the door.

"Hey, Aqua."

She didn't stop or turn, only lifting her chin higher.

"Aqua, wait."

Nope.

'Like I would talk to that jerk after last night!'

Slam!

Aqua saw stars and fell on her rump as someone opened the front door just as she reached for it herself.

"Oh my goodness, I'm so sorry!" Wiz said as Aqua proceeded to slump down and pass out.

"I tried to warn her," Kazuma said, "You saw me, Megumin, I tried."

"Indeed." Megumin poked Aqua with her staff. No reaction. "This time, Aqua only has herself to blame for this.

Stepping through the doorway, Shirou took in the scene of a fretting Wiz, an unconscious Aqua, and a bemused Megumin with a sigh.

"Wiz, I told you to be more careful."

Wiz gazed up at Shirou, looking like a scolded child.

"I'm sorry. I was just so excited to share my news with everybody."

The news that Wiz wanted to share happened because of Shirou's meticulous - slapshot - plan to keep Wiz on the straight and narrow without Wiz knowing about it.

The plan couldn't be any simpler. Shirou had taken Wiz out in the morning with Darkness in tow to get her a job. Shirou reasoned this would let Wiz form relationships with people and be less interested in hurting them. But, of course, Shirou told Wiz the opposite, that she would learn about humans to exploit their weaknesses.

Shirou's strategy, on paper, made sense. However, many famous scholars often said, 'No plan survives contact with the enemy.' The enemy, in Shirou's case, being a lonely shopkeeper.

"We found a shop advertising a need for a shopgirl. Shirou told me what to say earlier, so I said; Hello, Sir, my name is Wiz, and I dream of becoming a merchant."

Wiz clapped her hand in front of her, and Kazuma's eyes lasered in on the action that highlighted Wiz's already impressive assets.

"His face turned red, and it looked like he had trouble breathing, so I hurried to check on him."

Did she give the guy a heart attack?!

"But he got worse and collapsed. I didn't know what to do, so I rested his head on my lap and tried to shake him awake.

Lucky bastard!

"He woke up after a few minutes, and when he did, he said, 'It would be my honor to make your dream come true.' So he signed the shop over to me and retired!"

Wiz bounced on her toes and smiled such a joyful smile that Kazuma thought he might follow the shop keepers' example and join Aqua on the floor.

Tearing his eyes for the magnificent sight, which needed to be labeled a national treasure, Kazuma sidled up to Shirou as Megumin joined Wiz in her celebrations.

"What the hell, man? I thought you were going to get her a job."

Shirou pinched the bridge of his nose and tried to fight off a headache.

Success seemed unlikely.

"I did, but how could I expect some guy to give up his life's work? I tried to make him take back the deed, but he cried at the thought of disappointing Wiz." Kazuma wanted to judge but understood and couldn't blame the shop owner. Kazuma would be willing to sell his left nut and become a chainsaw monstrosity to make Wiz smile at him.

"... Well, at least you kinda succeeded."

Shirou shot Kazuma an irritated look, and it was the first time anyone had seen Shirou look frustrated.

Give him something monstrous to fight with a sword, and Shirou didn't flinch, but in this situation, he floundered like a toddler without their floaties.

A dejected Shirou went upstairs to retrieve some money. Wiz needed some start-up capital to get started as a new business owner properly.

"Shirou, did you get Wiz settled?" Darkness asked, watching as Shirou came to sit across from her at the guild

She frowned at that. Until Shirou's arrival, Darkness guarded the seat beside her to accept him, and he chose to sit next to Aqua.

"Yeah." Shirou caught the eyes of a pacing waitress, and she hurried off to the kitchen. "She's got a decent inventory to start, and I found a few catalogs of merchandise she can order to restock. She looked pretty happy when I left her."

Aqua crossed her arms and huffed, making her continued disgust of the lich clear to all.

"Ya, ya, the undead monstrosity is happy. Can we please focus on my needs for a little while?"

Aqua had been in a foul mood since last night, but had negotiated and got her tab extended. However, she still needed to come up with all the money plus five percent interest in the next two days.

"I need a quest, and I have a demand after last night. So I want to select a quest that requires a priest, and I get to keep the entire reward because I'm the only priest in the party."

Shirou shifted guiltily. It had been by his orders that Aqua's quest ended in failure, and while he didn't regret helping Wiz, he understood Aqua's displeasure at sparing an undead. However, Darkness rose in defense of her master—teacher!

"Aqua, I must object. Unless you complete a quest without help, it would not be proper for you to keep the full reward."

Against Darkness's expectation, Aqua smirked and reached down before slapping a guild notice on the table.

Urgent!

Giant Toxic Crocodiles have overtaken Sidhe Lake. Please drive these monsters away and purify our lake!

Reward: 250,000 Eris

Note: Only high-level priests capable of purification need to apply.

"I'm way ahead of you, Darkness. Toxic Crocodiles can't live in purified water, so I'm the only one capable of driving them out." Aqua tossed her long blue hair as she stood and placed her hands on the table. "Checkmate."

Darkness copied Aqua, so their faces were only inches apart.

"Is that the case? To purify the water, you must be in contact with it, right? So what happens when the Toxic Crocodile comes after you?"

Aqua opened her mouth, closed it, and opened it again.

She had been so impressed with herself for predicting Darkness's argument and finding the quest; Aqua forgot all about the actual logistics.

"Uh, umm, excuse me." A waitress said, holding several plates of food. Aqua and Darkness leaned back, allowing the waitress to set the food down.

"Thank you, Claire," Shirou said with a smile at the mousy girl, who blushed.

"O-of course, Shirou. Also, I couldn't help but overhear—"

Most of the people in the guild overheard. "—about clearing out Sidhe Lake. The guild has a monster cage we use for transporting live creatures. You could rent it if you wanted. That would keep Ms. Aqua safe while she purifies the lake.

"That's perfect! You could take it out of my reward, right?"

Shirou leaned back and crossed his arms as the waitress tried to answer Aqua's questions. The cage idea was a good one. In fact, Shirou would insist on doing it even if they were going to stand beside Aqua to fight off the Crocodiles as a redundancy.

"Deal!" Aqua said, reaching out to shake the waitress's hand. "Have it readied for us in ten minutes. Shirou," Aqua turned to look at him. "Give me the fried frog legs. There's no way you can finish all that in ten, and I don't want it to go to waste."

Shirou crossed his arms and frowned. He didn't like this plan.

They had no problems getting the cage and transporting it.

The lake looked as foul as the notice said it would be, with a fine layer of green algae covering the surface and the smell of sulfur wafting from its depths.

"I'm bored!" Aqua said. She sat in the cage where it rested in the lake, water coming up to her waist. She'd been there for all of twenty minutes.

Kazuma cupped his hands over his mouth to ensure his voice carried fifty meters to Aqua.

"Your the one who wanted to take this quest!"

Aqua slumped and rested her head on her knees.

Shirou exchanged a glance with Kazuma.

"Before we locked Aqua in there, did you ask if she had to pee?"

"Shirou!"

'What?' Shirou turned his attention to Darkness, wondering why she sounded so scandalized.

Darkness, in a rare show of nobility, stared down her nose at Shirou, her eyes narrow.

"One does not ask a lady such things —"

Kazuma didn't bother listening to Darkness, yelling out without shame or a hint of embarrassment.

"Hey, Aqua, do you have to go pee?"

"What!"

Aqua's earlier fire returned as she grabbed the iron bars and shrieked at Kazuma.

"I'm a goddess, you hear! Goddess, don't do such things!"

Huh, Shirou hadn't known that.

Kazuma turned to him and shrugged.

"I guess she's good for now, or will just go in the water if she needs to."

"You... You."

Darkness was having trouble forming a complete sentence, her eyes flickering from Aqua, Kazuma, and Shirou.

"Crusaders don't do that either!

"Nor do Crimson Demons,"

Darkness and Megumin decided to jump on the precedent Aqua unknowingly set.

Shirou wasn't sure how truthful the pair were, but didn't think it was worth arguing.

Kazuma however...

"Yeah, sure. We'll see what happens when we go on a multi-day quest. I'll make sure to watch you girls real close."

Megumin squeaked and brought her arms across her body, shielding herself from Kazuma's gaze.

"P-pervert."

Even Darkness looked unsettled by Kazuma's declaration if her shaking hands were anything to go by.

Shirou looked at Darkness in surprise. She had never seemed so unbalanced before. When her knees bent inward, though, the reason fell into place.

"You've got to go right now, don't you?"

Darkness squeaked, a high pitch chirp that would have sounded more natural coming from a baby bird than a hardened warrior. However, to Darkness's relief, which she felt guilty about, Aqua shrieked and drew everyone's attention back to the lake.

The Toxic Crocodiles made their appearance.

Even at a distance, it was easy to see that the crocodiles were massive specimens. Heads the size of car doors peaked through the water as they circled Aqua's cage.

Shirou bent his knees, and a bow appeared in his hands, held at the ready.

"Aqua, are you sure you don't want me to shoot them?"

"N-no! I'm ok. I think the crocodiles know they can't break the cage!"

Indeed, though they emitted a palpable aura of menace, they still hadn't attacked Aqua.

"Purificationpurificationpurification."

Aqua decided to take the quest more seriously as she chanted her spell so fast that her incantations blurred together.

"You know," Kazuma said, "I don't get why they call them toxic crocodiles."

Kazuma delivered his comment with an air of casual disregard for Aqua's apparent discomfort. Curious. Maybe Kazuma knew something Shirou didn't.

"It must be their skin, right? So they exude some toxin, and that's why the lake is gross."

Megumin eyed the lake with a hungry expression, fidgeting with her staff. Shirou didn't doubt she wanted to unleash an explosion, but doing that would also hurt or kill Aqua.

"No, that can't be right. Remember what Luna told us? They inhabit bodies of water that have become polluted. That's why the quest is to purify the lake, not slay the beasts."

While Darkness made a good point, Shirou couldn't help but think their focus was on the wrong thing. They weren't even looking at the lake anymore, lost in their debate. A debate that came to an abrupt halt as the answer became evident.

"You call that a purification spell? All it's doing is making me tingle in all the right places."

The silence that followed the statement echoed in its abruptness. Even Aqua quit casting to gape at the crocodile that had... spoken?

"You stopped? Just as well. An ugly priestess wouldn't do it for me, anyway. What do you guys think?"

Shirou blinked. He cleared out his ears and continued to stare.

"I don't know. She's got that pathetic weakling vibe that I love." Another crocodile spoke, its voice surprisingly nasal for such an enormous creature. "Hey, priestess, why don't you open that cage door so you and I can create real magic?"

Aqua shook off her shock and glared, standing up in her cage as she did."

"Oh, it's on you, stupid reptile. Ugly priestess? Helpless priestess? Real magic?!" Aqua raised her hands, and a corona of magical energy surrounded her. "You're going to regret saying those things! Behold my might and tremble. Holy Purification!"

White light bathed the lake, so bright that Shirou had to cover his eyes. He heard the others shout and curse as the brilliance of Aqua's spell blinded as well them.

The light faded after a moment, and Shirou blinked tears from his eyes and squinted.

"Heh, that the best you got? Are you really a priest? I bet some church felt sorry for you and let you in out of pity."

Aqua's spell failed to purify the lake.

"Oh, you son of a b—"

Aqua cut herself off as she cast her spell again.

"Well," Kazuma said. "At least we know why they're called toxic."

The journey back to town felt awkward. Nobody spoke as they trudged along the path, Shirou, Darkness, Kazuma, and Megumin surrounding the horse-drawn carriage while Aqua sat in her cage, staring at nothing.

Shirou glanced at Aqua several times a minute, but couldn't find anything to say. It had taken her two hours to purify the lake after the crocodiles appeared, two hours of hurtful insults and off-color jokes aimed at Aqua. She hadn't taken it well.

"H-hey, Aqua!" Kazuma said and waved at Aqua, the motion stiff and jerky. "Don't you think it's time to leave the cage? We're almost at the gate."

Aqua didn't even blink.

"H-hey—"

"Scary."

A word spoken in such a soft voice, Shirou wondered if he heard correctly.

"What did you say, Aqua?" Shirou tried to catch her eye as he asked his question, to no avail.

"The outside world is a scary, cruel place. The cage will protect me. It's my home now. I'm never coming out."

Right. Shirou shared a looked with Kazuma, and they brought their heads together.

"Any ideas?"

"None, man, sorry. I think those crocodiles traumatized her."

Shirou nodded in agreement. Aqua had a lot of pride, and those crocodiles had lived up to their name.

"Then we'll have to wait until she's ready."

Kazuma's cheek twitched, and he turned to glare at Shirou.

"Are you kidding, man? We can't walk her through town like this. People will think we're kidnapping her or something."

They could make out the gate entrance into Axle, and Kazuma wasn't wrong. So Shirou decided against stopping Kazuma as he approached the cage door, grumbling under his breath.

"Come on, Aqua, time to get out."

Kazuma jumped on the wagon and fished out the key to the cage. Before he could insert it, Aqua's head snapped up, and she shot forward, hand raised to strike.

"Back, foul demon!"

Kazuma let out a girlish yelp and hopped back, but of course, given he stood in a wagon, Kazuma only accomplished landing in a painful heap at Shirou's feet. He gasped, expression locked in a pained grimace.

"Ok, we'll wait until she's ready."

So it was that they walked into the city to the stares and whispers of the town folk as Kazuma predicted.

"Is that woman in a cage?"

"Did they kidnap her?"

"What horrible people."

Aqua never moved, sitting there hugging her knees, eyes vacant.

"Milady?"

At first, nobody turned as a fresh voice rose above the general murmur. Neither Megumin nor Darkness belonged to the nobility to Shirou's knowledge, so he assumed whoever spoke was addressing someone else.

That assumption proved false as an armored figure charged from the crowd and ran forward to latch onto the cage bars.

"Milady! Goddess Aqua!"

Oh... Right.

I didn't think I'd be posting this today, but I'm glad I got something out there. In other news I picked up the new PSVR and got Resident Evil Village to go along with it. I may be forever traumatized, which is giving me weird feelings of camaraderie with Aqua, go figure.

And yes, evil Wiz! Muhahaha! I'm gonna have so much fun with this.

Thanks for reading!