Chapter 10 Snacks

It was dark, somehow much darker than the previous night when the Koopalings fought Doopliss. Regardless, Roy didn't feel dread, fear, or even some level of discomfort. He just felt tired as he laid in his bed. This made sense; he hadn't really gotten a lot of sleep last night, so this was just his body's way of making up for lost time. Once he slept this night away, he would be able to get up the next morning without any sort of trouble. Right?

Roy turned over on his belly, laying his head on his arm as he did. These past few days…aside from being described as "terrifying" and "horrible," they were also…weird. On some level, it was weird finding out about Doopliss. It was weird having to fight someone who looked, sounded, and had the exact same powers as Ludwig. It was weird seeing "Ludwig" give the Koopalings these malicious looks, as well the maniacal laughs that would make cartoon super villains blush. He was…Roy didn't even know how to describe Doopliss. And honestly, he didn't particularly want to spend time thinking about it, as thinking about the demon possessing his brother's body made him feel sick to his stomach.

So, Roy turned over on his side. He wanted to get to sleep as soon as possible. Question is, how exactly was he going to do that? Was there any method usable to him that would cause him to drift off into REM?

Well, one tried and true method people used was counting sheep. Honestly, that method always confused Roy. What, did people sneak into some pastures and just count the sheep grazing there? That seemed more than a little silly. Roy had always wondered how shepherds were able to stay awake, if counting sheep was the mental equivalent to eating turkey and drinking warm milk. What, have they become numb to the soothing qualities of sheep counting? Well, if counting sheep didn't work on them, then it more than likely wouldn't work on Roy. He needed to use a new method, a better method. But what could that better method be?

Gurgggg.

Roy blinked and sat up. Wow, his tummy was really loud. Was this because he skipped breakfast? Or could it be because dinner was of very small proportions? Either way, Roy's stomach needed food, needed sustenance. Maybe, if Roy were to satisfy the monster that was his belly, he would finally feel tired enough to close his eyes and sleep into the next day. Maybe he could even fall asleep with a powerful form of satisfaction too? Oh yeah, that sounded like a great idea! With how anxiety inducing the past day has been, ending it on a satisfied note would be…well, satisfying.

So now, there was only one question that remained. Where was Roy going to get some snacks? There was the kitchen, but more than likely he would run into people who would insist he return to his room. After all, Bowser was very strict with reinforcing the Koopalings' bedtimes. Ooh, what about the common room? There was always some munchies stashed away in the mini fridge down there! But….oh, Roy didn't want to walk to the common room. He would have to walk down the second floor hallway, make his way down the long stairwell, through the first floor hallway until he got to the common room at the end of it. That sounded tiring enough, but when factoring in that he would be required to walk all the way back? Yeah, no. No way, no how, nuh uh. Somethings in life were just too challenging to tackle, and making that journey when Roy was already exhausted was one of them.

Roy sighed in frustration and lied back down. Looks like he would have to go to sleep on an empty stomach. Oh, happy happy, joy joy. How could he be expected to sleep with this gnawing emptiness in his belly?

Gurgggllleee.

Seriously, how? Each time his stomach gurgled now only made the hunger more pronounced. Roy whimpered a little bit; this was torture! This was inhumane! He needed food! He needed food, and he needed it now! How can such an important physical such as hunger go completely unaddressed? People died if they went without food for too long! It wasn't too much of a stretch to think that Roy was going to experience the same fate if he ignored his belly's loud and miserable calls.

When he had this thought, fear filled him. He sat up in bed once again, bemoaning the fact that he would have to make the long long long journey to the common room after all. So, he set his feet down on the floor. He was just about to turn his doorknob when something occurred to him, something that made him so happy and relieved that he almost sang the Hallelujah chorus.

He didn't have to go all the way down to the common room! Iggy had stashed some snacks away in his lab!

Roy smiled when he remembered this, even going so far as to do a fist pump when he did. He could just go over to the lab, a journey that was much less harrowing and a lot more easy in comparison to the trek to the common room. Sure, would Iggy be particularly thrilled when he found out his precious supply of junk food had been ransacked? Probably not. But you know what, Roy could cross that bridge when he got to it. His hunger was too important to go unaddressed. And sure, while Iggy was stubborn and stuck up, he could listen to reason. Roy was sure he could pelt him with extremely good reason when the time came.

So, with a very bouncy spring in his step, Roy made his way out the door. He even giggled as he made his way to Iggy's lab, feeling like all was right with the world. Sure, that wasn't true by any stretch of the imagination, but you know what? He didn't care. In this particular instance, fate had decided to treat Roy Koopa with kindness as opposed to the very cold, very cruel apathy that it normally displayed. That alone was enough to put Roy on Cloud Nine and leave him there. And man, Cloud Nine was such a good state to be in; it was like a euphoria that had no sign of ending. Was this how Lemmy felt, smiling and laughing and feeling a type of joy that most people didn't chase because they had no hope of actually experiencing it? Man, if this was what Lemmy felt like, Roy needed him to spill all of his secrets as to how he was able to experience this everyday. Seriously, he desperately wanted this state of being to be permanent.

Regardless of whether or not it was permanent, Roy still grinned as he made his way toward the lab. He opened the door up with the sneakiness of a sleuth, his heart feeling extra fluttery. He realized as he made his way down the lab stairs that he was doing something naughty, as normally, Iggy didn't like people sneaking into his lab. This just made his euphoric state stronger. He was a Koopa after all; if a Koopa didn't do something devious at least once a week, then they needed to rethink their life as Koopas loved feeling like naughty, sneaky rebels.

Once in the lab, Roy rubbed his hands together and began searching. He didn't remember the exact place where Iggy had put the treats, only that they were tucked away somewhere in this room. He checked in the cabinets, but all he find where beakers, flasks, and test tubes. He checked in the drawers of the lab tables, but they were as empty as Roy's stomach. He almost checked the chemical cabinets, only to realize that not even he was stupid enough to mess with those.

"Darn it," Roy whispered aloud. "Where are these snacks?" He checked near the TV (why did Iggy have a TV in his lab; he was too preoccupied with his nerd activities to take the time to watch what the cool kids watch), but he still didn't find them. Just as he was growing frustrated and was about to go down to the common room anyway, he noticed something shiny and orange poking out of a box situated underneath Iggy's desktop computer. Not wanting to grow too excited but at the same time not being able to help himself, he snuck his way over to the box. Opening it up, you would think he had just discovered a bar of gold with how enthusiastically he reacted to his discovery.

"YEESSS!" He yelled. He remembered it was in the middle of the night and that people were sleeping as soon as he finished, so he chuckled sheepishly. "Sorry, yes!" He whispered to himself. He licked his lips looking into the box. There were more snack bags in there than Roy could shake a stick at! Potato chips (regular, barbecue, sour cream and onion), pretzels, cheese puffs, corn chips…oh man, was Roy in Heaven right now?

"Looks like I hit the jackpot!" Roy said. His face lit up. "Or, as I guess I should say, the snackpot!" He laughed at his own joke, actually feeling a little proud of himself for that one. "Man, I need to tell that one to Lemmy when he comes back."

"Stealing snacks?"

Roy did a double take (thankfully not shrieking) when he heard someone addressing him. At first, he was scared that it was Iggy, coming into the lab to berate him for stealing his food. Thankfully, it was just Doopliss, giving him an amused smirk through the window of his cell.

Roy puffed out his chest and gave Doopliss and annoyed look. "Yeah, I am. What's it to you?"

Doopliss chuckled. "You are devious, good sir. You make even me blush." He shrugged. "But I feel obligated to warn you; eating so late at night is bad for your health."

That fueled Roy's annoyance even more. "Dude…you're dead! I think you're the last person to lecture anybody about their health."

Doopliss chuckled again, the sound more slimy than before. "Eh. You don't know how I died. For all you know, I could have croaked because I ate food late at night too. And if that's the case, that would make me empathetic."

Roy sniffed. "No. If anything, that would make you hypocritical." He shook his head. "You know what? I'm getting hungrier by the second; I don't need to waste time talking to a body snatcher."

With that, Roy began stuffing his hammerspace full of the snack bags. His mouth watered more and more with each snack type he picked up. He only got more excited when he found some snack cakes at the bottom of the box.

"Oh baby!" He grinned as he put those in his hammerspace too. "Talk about a sweet discovery!" He laughed out loud. "Man, I'm on a roll! Lemmy sure would be proud of me." A somber mood overtook him for a second. "I really hope he returns soon." He stood still for a second, lamenting the absence of not just one, but both of his older brothers. Just as soon as the sobriety overcame him though, it disappeared. He put his smile back on, put the snack cakes into his hammerspace, closed the box, and stood up. He wobbled a little, just now noticing the extra weight that all of these snacks put on him. After taking a little bit of time to adjust, he chuckled to himself and made his way toward the door.

"Well, I'm all snacked up and ready to eat." Just as he was about to exit, he turned back toward the room holding the nasty nasty nasty duplighost. "Have a good night, you monster. I hope you get some sleep," he said, practically spitting out the words.

Doopliss snickered. "Thank you for your concern." He chuckled a little. "It's poorly placed, but I thank you for it."

Roy shook his head. Man, this guy was mean. What was the word used to describe people like that? Stains? Jerks? Oh wait, dicks! Doopliss was a dick, more so than the person whose body he was possessing.

"Yeah yeah, screw you too." Without another word, Roy made his way out of the lab, ready to chow down.