Super Sped Bros.
By: Metal Sonic EX
Disclaimer: I don't own Super Smash Bros. or any of the related games.
Chapter Fourteen
Give Me A Master Hand!
Master Hand - Excellent! The last chapter!
Ness - The what now?
Master Hand - Now, I will use you all like little stress balls! Like so!
(Master Hand grabs Jigglypuff and begins squeezing her. Jigglypuff gets huffy and expands.)
Master Hand - Fine! Be that way!
(Master Hand throws Jigglypuff into the cosmos.)
Master Hand - I can still point the way!
(Master Hand pokes Pikachu into the cosmos.)
Samus - Attack!
(Everyone grabs a hammer and begins dancing towards him. Master Hand flies off and smacks the ground, sending Ness into the cosmos.)
Link - We're losing!
Samus - No, we're not!
(Master Hand flies off and comes towards them with his pink and index finger pointing forward.)
Master Hand - Rock on!
(Fox and Luigi are blasted into the cosmos.)
Samus - Yes, we are!
Master Hand - Dodge this!!
(Master Hand shoots a barrage of bullets from his first two fingers and everyone is blasted into the cosmos.)
Master Hand - I win!! Ahahahaha!!
Crazy Hand - In the cosmos…
(Everyone is floating around.)
Ness - So… Any bright ideas?
Fox - None.
Mario - Nada.
Pikachu - Pika pika… (Nothing really…)
(A can of soda floats by.)
Samus - What's this?
(Samus scans it. It reads 'Gay Hoe Soft Drink. Quintuple-Caffeinated.' Samus slowly turns to Falcon, who shrugs.)
Falcon - Don't look at me.
Samus - I'm looking at you.
Falcon - Why?
(Samus grabs the pop and throws it at Falcon. A few minutes later, Falcon grabs it.)
Fox - Is that…
(Falcon shrugs and pops it open.)
Mario - Samus…
(Falcon downs the whole can and his pupils dilate.)
Pikachu - Pika pika?! (What have you done?!)
Crazy Hand - Back at Final Destination…
Master Hand - You know, we've got to stop talking to ourselves.
Crazy Hand - I know…
(Master Hand picks up a card.)
Master Hand - Got a five?
Crazy Hand - I hope you choke on it.
(As Crazy Hand gives the five over, an explosion is seen in the air.)
Crazy Hand - That's my cue! -flies off-
Master Hand - Who dares to interfere with my game of Go Fish?!
(Master Hand looks into the sky and sees a large mass of people.)
Master Hand - What the hell?
(Eleven people are holding on the Falcon, who is smiling an abnormally large smile and is flying towards the ground, flaming and with his fist extended.)
Falcon - I shall smiteth thee!
(An explosion occurs when Falcon hits the ground. He jumps to his feet when the dust settles and holds a golden spork into the air.)
Falcon - Behold! The golden spork of Antioch!
Master Hand - Do you expect to defeat me using a spork and a fruitcake in the middle of a caffeine rush?
Falcon - No! We expect to defeat you using spork and a fruit… Oh, wait! Yeah, that's right. And there's nothing you can do about it!
Master Hand - You do realize that you insulted yourself, right?
Samus - Don't encourage him.
Falcon - Die, foul creature!
Master Hand - Give it up! You can't…
(Falcon pokes Master Hand with the spork and Master Hand flies into the distance, exploding and screaming.)
Master Hand - AAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSHOLES!!
(Falcon waves, then, when Master Hand is gone, thrusts the spork into the air.)
Falcon - Do not doubt the judgment of the golden spork!
(Luigi goes to kneel, but Samus pulls him up.)
Samus - Don't encourage him.
Falcon - I shall now use the spork's power to send us all home!
Samus - Encourage him.
(Falcon pokes Fox, Pikachu, Jigglypuff, Ness, DK, Kirby, Mario, Luigi, and Samus and they all fly into the cosmos. Link and Yoshi exchange looks and turn to Falcon.)
Falcon- I don't like old meat. And I don't like meat from this 'High Cruel' place…
Link - Uh… It's actually…
(Link gets poked into the cosmos, shortly followed by Yoshi.)
Falcon - My turn!
(Falcon stabs himself in the face and flies into the cosmos. Seconds pass and Falcon reappears on a platform.)
Falcon - I'm a genius!
Samus - Not really.
(Falcon turns and sees everyone sitting on the Final Destination platform.)
Ness - So, what do we do?
(DK goes up to Link and begins picking bugs from his hair.)
Link - This isn't what I had in mind.
Luigi - Maybe we should call for help.
Samus - I was thinking of actually waiting for help.
Fox - Same concept.
Pikachu - Pikapika… (Not really…)
Jigglypuff - Jiggypuff puff… (My nuts itch…)
(Everyone slowly turns to Jigglypuff as she puffs up and turns around.)
Mario - Let's just hope help comes soon.
Crazy Hand - Thus ends the first chronicle of the Super Sped Bros. What will happen to them? Will help come? Could this fic become anymore special? You bet! Just you wait until Super Sped Bros. Mayday comes out…