"I gave her a mild sedative, so she'll sleep for the next six or seven hours." Dr. Lindstrom said, getting up from the bed where Alex lay sleeping.
"Thank you for coming, Dr. Lindstrom. I've heard her scream before, but never like that. It scared me." Olivia admitted, holding Alex's limp hand in her own.
"Olivia, just one word of advice. There's no shame in taking some time out to take care of yourself, even if it's just to go for a walk or whatever it is you like to do to relieve stress. You can't take amazing care of Alex if you don't at least take good care of yourself." Dr. Lindstrom said kindly, seeing Olivia's pretty face pinched with worry.
"Thank you." Olivia offered a tired smile.
"Don't get up, I'll see myself out. Call me anytime you need me, and I'll see you both for Alex's next therapy session on Wednesday afternoon."
After Dr. Lindstrom left, Olivia made two phone calls; one to Don Cragen and one to Casey Novak. Casey arrived at their door within half an hour of Olivia's phone call.
"Thank you for coming, Casey. Dr. Lindstrom said she'll be asleep for the next six or seven hours, but I didn't want to leave her here alone while I'm gone." Olivia said, stepping aside to allow Casey entrance into the apartment.
"It's not a problem at all. Amanda said I can stay as long as you need me." Casey smiled.
"I'll be back in a few hours. Feel free to watch TV and help yourself to whatever's in the fridge."
Olivia drove over to Cragen's apartment and let herself inside using her key. Don looked up when she walked in and smiled, opening his arms to welcome her into them. She snuggled into his arms and took a deep breath, letting it out slowly as he gently stroked her hair and back.
"Good girl for calling me when you needed help. You know what to do." Cragen kissed her head.
"Yes, sir."
Olivia obediently went to the familiar spare bedroom. She kicked her shoes off, pulled her pants and panties down to her knees, and stood in the corner with her hands on her head to wait for him. She felt her belly do a flip when she heard his footsteps on the floor in the hallway approaching the bedroom.
"Did you bring it with you?" Olivia heard Don's voice behind her.
"Yes, sir. It's in my bag on the floor." Olivia replied, still facing the corner, knowing better than to turn around before being given permission.
There were a few more long minutes of silence before Olivia finally heard Don's voice releasing her from her captivity in the corner.
"Come here, Olivia."
Olivia obediently turned from the corner and walked over to where Don was sitting on the bed. Without being told, she draped herself over his lap, noticing the hairbrush in his hand.
"I'm very proud of you for calling me when you needed help, baby. That was a very good thing to do. Why are we here today?" Don gently rubbed Olivia's bottom with the hairbrush as he spoke.
"To relieve my stress, sir. I feel like a failure where Alex is concerned. I reassure her all day every day, but she's still so scared, and now she's back to stuttering, and I'm afraid of breaking her even more, and every time she has a flashback…"
Don patiently listened to his beloved daughter pour her heart out to him as he continued to rub her bottom. When Olivia finally ran out of words to say, she fell silent over his lap, quietly whimpering and sniffling.
"You have been under a great deal of stress the last few months, baby, and I am so proud of how well you have been handling everything. I've told you this before, and I'll tell you again, I'm not the least bit worried about how you handle Alex, because I've watched you. You deal with Alex using your gut and your intuition, and that is exactly the right way to handle any submissive, but especially a submissive that has been through trauma. You are Alex's safe place to heal, and she knows that."
"But she's stuttering again." Olivia whimpered.
"And that's not your fault. It's those idiot cops who should be ashamed of themselves for re-traumatizing her."
"I should have been home with her this morning. I could have stopped them from taking her. I should have known she would need me, but I was late for work and I had to-"
"That isn't your fault either. There's no way you could have known what was going to happen this morning because nobody contacted you like they should have."
"Please spank me, sir." Olivia whimpered.
"I'm going to, baby. I'm going to give you a healthy dose of this hairbrush and then you are going to bend across the bed for a session with my belt. You don't have to count this time, but I want you to think about the past few months and realize just how much progress you and Alex have both made and be proud of yourself for that. Alex wouldn't be doing as well as she is right now without you and I know you feel the same about her."
"I love her so much." Olivia whimpered with a trembling lower lip.
"I know you do, and she loves you too. And I know you've been carrying a lot of unnecessary guilt over these last several weeks. You're going to cry it out right now while I spank it out of you, and you're going to let the past be in the past. Do you understand?"
"Yes, sir."
"Good girl. Relax back here, you know better." Don tapped Olivia's bottom with the hairbrush.
Olivia forced herself to relax her bottom muscles and yelped as the hairbrush came crashing down on her bare bottom, followed quickly by another, and another, and another. Being a Top, Olivia wasn't nearly as graceful about taking spankings as Alex was and she couldn't help but squirm a little, but Don didn't mind. He just held her firmly around her waist and focused his strict attention on her naughty bottom, watching as it turned from white to pink to red. Finally, Olivia let go of her pride and began to cry deeply. This was the signal Don had been waiting for; he delivered ten final spanks with the hairbrush and paused, again rubbing Olivia's cherry red bottom with the hairbrush.
"Stand up when you want to and get in position for the belt, baby."
Olivia cried for several long minutes before she pushed herself up from his lap and bent across the bed with a pillow under her hips elevating her bottom. She cringed when she heard the familiar sound of his belt being pulled from his belt loops and felt the belt tapping her bottom.
"Tell me what you're thinking right now, baby."
"It hurts." Olivia choked out.
"It's supposed to hurt."
"I'm such a failure. I should be home with her right now, but I'm here because I'm too selfish to just suck it up and- OW!" Olivia yelped as the belt landed sharply.
"Alex is sleeping right now, she doesn't even know you're gone. And you didn't leave her alone, you left her with Casey, just like you left her with me that one day when she was sick."
"I shouldn't have done that either. I should always be there. OW!" Olivia sobbed.
"You are always there when it counts. You have been there for every nightmare, every flashback, and every milestone. Right now is about you; just for you to let go of your stress and find strength and comfort. It's been a long time since you've had a good whipping with my belt, and I can see that a good whipping is long overdue if this is the way you've been treating yourself. Do you need a pillow to hold on to?"
"Yes, sir."
Don gave Olivia a pillow to cling to and she sobbed into it as her whipping began. She wasn't sure when he stopped, but eventually she realized that she was no longer being whipped and instead was being cuddled in his arms. When she realized that it was over, she dropped the pillow she had been clinging to and instead threw her arms around his neck and sobbed until she didn't think she could sob anymore.
"Is it all cried out now, baby?" Don asked kindly.
"Yes, sir." Olivia sniffled, lifting her head from his shoulder. Her bottom was on fire, but she felt as if a weight had been lifted from her shoulders.
"That's my good girl. We just have one more thing to take care of, and then you can lie down for a nap and I'll order some take-out."
"Yes, sir?" Olivia looked at him in confusion.
"You recently implemented a new rule for Alex. Can you tell me what that rule is?" Don inquired.
"Huh? Oh, right. Every time she says something negative about herself, she has to spend fifteen minutes standing in the corner after I've washed her mouth out with soap." Olivia replied.
"Well, my baby girl, starting right now I'm implementing the same rule for you. I won't have my daughter calling herself a failure and selfish when she is anything but that." Don said sternly.
"But, Daddy! OUCH!" Olivia whined as Don led her by the hand into the bathroom, earning a sharp pop to her bottom.
"Don't 'but Daddy' me, young lady. Sit down and open your mouth."
Olivia choked on a sob as she reluctantly sat down on her bare, punished bottom. Don prepared a cloth and spent several minutes thoroughly scrubbing her mouth. Then he put the bar of soap in her mouth and led her back into the bedroom and over to the same corner she had been standing in earlier.
"Fifteen minutes." Don reminded her.
Olivia had forgotten how humbling of an experience it was to get one's mouth washed out with soap, and stood in the corner with her hands on her head, her face blushing nearly as red as her bottom. When Don released her from the corner again, he spent about five extra minutes lecturing her about believing in herself and trusting her capabilities before he finally allowed her to rinse her mouth with water and then welcomed her back into his arms. Olivia buried her face on his shoulder, more embarrassed than anything else.
"Come on, baby, it's time for a nap now." Don said lovingly.
"Yes, sir." Olivia agreed tiredly.
Olivia fell asleep rather quickly and slept for a little over an hour before she was roused by the delicious smell of her favorite Chinese food. The brunette detective crawled out of bed and carefully pulled up her panties with a wince and a whimper, but she didn't bother putting her pants back on yet as she left the bedroom and followed the delicious smell into the kitchen. Don looked up and smiled at her.
"Ah, perfect timing. The food just got here about fifteen minutes ago."
"Is there chicken lo mein?" Olivia asked hopefully.
"Of course there is. An entire carton just for you." Don smiled as he offered her the container.
Momentarily forgetting about her spanked bottom, Olivia sat down at the table and yelped when her bottom made contact with the hard wooden chair. Don retrieved a cushion and placed it on the chair for her.
"Here, baby, try that. If it still hurts, I'm afraid you'll just have to eat standing up." Don smiled sympathetically.
With a full belly and a light heart, Olivia curled up in Don's arms on the couch while they watched TV together and Olivia taught Don how he could record shows and watch them later. They laughed for a while as they watched Lucille Ball's crazy antics, and then they watched an old western that Don remembered fondly from his childhood. Olivia looked up at the clock and saw that about three hours had passed.
"I'd better get home so I can relieve Casey." Olivia decided, getting up from the couch.
"I would recommend putting on pants first." Don teased.
Olivia stuck her tongue out at him and hurried past him, giggling as he playfully swatted at her. She found her pants, got dressed, and retrieved her bag.
"Thanks for this afternoon, Daddy. I really needed it." Olivia smiled.
"I'm always here for you when you need me, baby. I love you." Don kissed Olivia's forehead.
"I love you too." Olivia leaned into the affection.
Olivia walked into her apartment and found Casey on the couch watching TV. Casey looked up when Olivia walked in.
"Hey. Find anything good to watch?" Olivia smiled.
"I got distracted watching this true crime documentary. Alex is still out cold." Casey said.
"I figured she would be. Thanks for sticking around anyway."
"Anytime."
Olivia decided to put one of Alex's favorite meals in the crockpot and save it for when Alex woke up, and then she sat down on the couch with a small stack of files to catch up on some paperwork. She looked up and smiled when she saw Alex crawling toward her.
"There you are, my beauty. You're awake." Olivia set her paperwork aside and welcomed Alex onto her lap.
"W-w-wh-what… h-h-h-happened… M-M-M-Ma'am?" Alex asked, snuggling into Olivia's arms.
"You had a panic attack, lovey. I called Dr. Lindstrom and he came over and gave you a sedative." Olivia explained as she gently rubbed Alex's bottom.
"I… r-r-re-re-remember… h-h-h-hearing… y-y-you… o-on… th-the… ph-ph-phone. I th-th-thought… y-you… w-were… s-s-sending… m-m-me… a-away."
"Okay, honey, I want you to take a big, deep breath in; one, two, three, four. And hold it; one, two, three, four, five, six, seven. And let it out slowly; one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. That's my good girl. Squeeze my hand when you're ready to listen, angel." Olivia gently took Alex's hand in her own.
Alex squirmed a little bit so that she was in a relaxed, reclined position in Olivia's arms and very comfortable, then she squeezed Olivia's hand. Olivia gently placed her hand on Alex's belly and began to rub Alex's belly the way she liked.
"I will never, ever send you away from me, little one. It doesn't matter what you do or how you behave, I will never, ever get rid of you. You are and always will be my good, sweet little Alex. Repeat what I just said in your own words."
"Y-you… w-w-won't… e-e-ever… s-s-send… m-me… a-a-away… M-M-Ma'am… n-no… m-ma-matter… w-what." Alex said.
"Again."
"Y-You… w-w-will… n-ne-never… g-get… r-r-rid… o-of… m-me… n-n-no… m-m-matter… w-w-what… M-Ma'am." Alex repeated.
"That's my good girl." Olivia praised.
"B-B-But… M-Ma'am? W-What… if… th-the… f-f-f-f-flashbacks… n-n-never… g-go… a-a-away?"
"Eventually they will go away, sweetheart, I promise. But even if they don't, I will still never send you away. I will never get tired of reassuring you of how much I love you. I will never get tired of holding you in my arms like this and telling you that you're a good girl. I will do all of those things every day for the rest of my life, however many times a day you need me to do them."
"I… l-l-l-love… y-you… M-M-Ma'am." Alex smiled, successfully reassured for the time being.
"I love you too, my angel." Olivia kissed Alex's forehead, nose, and lips.
Olivia shifted on the couch a little and winced. Alex smiled, her eyes sparkling with mischief.
"Th-th-the… h-hair-h-hairbrush… h-h-hurts… d-d-d-doesn't… i-i-it… M-M-Ma'am?" Alex teased, and the blonde squealed with laughter as she was playfully flipped over her Mistress's lap right there on the couch.