JENNIE

Click. Click. Click.

My sister stood in front of a three-way mirror, her posture straight and perfect. The lights surrounding the mirror illuminated her from every angle. Bridal gowns lined the walls like clouds.

She pivoted with practiced ease, all in glittering white, as I snapped her picture: front, side, and back. Twisting her waterfall of hair off her neck, she eyed the scoop of satin below. A saleswoman swooped in with a veil on a jeweled comb.

"You're an angel in that dress," the saleswoman sighed. "All you need is a pair of wings."

I heard Lisa's deep murmur as she touched me between my legs.

Angel.

Did she have to call me that?

"You're too sweet." Jisoo beamed at the saleswoman, who was already her new best friend. "This dress is magic. It's a definite maybe," she added to me as she went into the dressing room. Yards of satin swished with each step.

"You're such a good assistant," the saleswoman said to me. "Taking pictures of everything she tries on." She gestured to the drifts of white dresses, billowing like whipped cream. "I wish I'd had a sister to go wedding dress shopping with me."

"Mmm," I said. "Yeah, it's special."

I was sore. Every twinge, sharp and delicate, was a memory of Lisa waking me in the middle of the night and plunging into me from behind.

Afterward, I'd asked her to set her alarm even earlier than usual, because I had to drive home to meet my sister.

"How early?"

"Seven."

She shook her head, but she was smiling. When her phone roused us, she brought in breakfast on the cookie sheet. There was granola in a bowl, and when she fed me a chunk with her fingers, I ate it. Eagerly. And opened my mouth for more.

Jisoo emerged from the dressing room in a mermaid-style gown that hugged her figure and flared out at the bottom. Sequins caught the light. The stiff strapless bodice showed a tease of cleavage. She smiled for the pictures — I was getting to be a pro — then frowned at her reflection.

"I don't think so," she announced. The saleswoman nodded in agreement.

"Why not?" I circled her, adjusting the zipper in back. "It shows you off. It's sexy."

"Looking sexy is not the point. It's my wedding. We'll be kneeling in church."

"And what are you going to be doing that night?" Her curves were so toned, I could cry. I snapped another picture, a rear-view close-up, and showed it to her. "Look, it's your butt. Make that the background on your phone."

The saleswoman glared at me.

Jisoo laughed charmingly. "It's way too tight."

"That's the point. Haein will be dying to rip it off you."

Jisoo rolled her eyes and rustled back to the fitting room. I followed.

"Aren't you excited?" I leaned close to whisper as she shut the door. "Are you still waiting for your wedding night?"

"Of course." Her cheeks had a tinge of pink, probably from thinking of the thousands of guys who were in mourning that they'd never sleep with her. She tweaked my ponytail. "You're so smiley. Don't tell me…are you in love?"

"No!" I snorted.

The saleswoman brought her another dress, cream satin with a train a mile long. I carried the shining material as Jisoo left the dressing room and let it pool around her in front of the mirrors.

"Don't take any pictures yet." Jisoo turned from side to side, adjusting her dress.

Fine with me. I dropped into the armchair by the mirror. Here in the bridal shop, I couldn't stop smiling.

"I'm beautiful," I whispered.

Lisa had been screwing with me. Messing with my head. But the smile kept breaking through. I buried my face in the crook of my elbow and giggled.

I was so fucked.

The saleswoman shot me a glance. She probably thought I was high. Setting a glimmering tiara on my sister's hair, she patted it in place. A gauzy veil floated around her bare shoulders.

"Honey!" Jisoo, in her cream satin dress, was waving her hand in front of my face. "Hello? It's picture time."

"Okay, okay, I got it."

I groped through my purse for my phone. My fingers brushed bills. Lisa had slipped them in this morning while I threw my clothes on. I'd been in such a rush to drive home, such a rush to pretend they weren't there, that I hadn't moved them to my wallet.

Three feet away from my sister, surrounded by pristine white dresses, I took a peek.

You're beautiful, the top bill said. In writing so small and precise, it didn't seem human.

"Jennie?" Jisoo stared at me. "What are you doing with…" She inclined her head toward the twenty in my hand.

Jesus fucking Christ. I shoved the bills in my wallet and slid halfway down the armchair, giggling like I'd lost my mind.

"Are you okay?" The saleswoman gave me a strange look.

"I think she's in love," my sister informed her.

"How sweet!" Her face brightened, and she winked at me. "I can bring you some dresses to try on too…"

"No, I'm good." I smiled at her and got up to photograph Jisoo with her satin train. After I snapped the pictures, she put an arm around my shoulders, and I squeezed her waist.

"Sisters," the saleswoman sighed. "You look so much alike. Two peas in a pod."

I stood next to my sister, reflected in the mirror. Shorter, rounder, with the volume turned to medium instead of mega.

The mirror in Lisa's room didn't lie. This mirror twinkled with lights on all sides, set in the middle of soft beauty, but it didn't lie either. I looked at the truth about my sister and me, and for the first time, I didn't care.

"What are you doing for bridesmaid dresses?" the saleswoman wanted to know.

"It's up to Jennie. You pick, honey." Jisoo gave me a pearly smile. "I'm sure the girls will like what you choose. You have great taste."

"I'll wear whatever you want me to," I protested. "If you want us to look like ruffly curtains or birthday cakes, I'll do it. It's your day. Go wild."

Jisoo laughed. "Oh, that's me. Wild."

My phone rang, with my mom's name on the screen. I moved away to answer.

"Hi there!" I bubbled. "We're in the bridal shop. Jisoo is trying on every dress and they all look fantastic."

"I'm glad you made it." My mother sounded disapproving. "We thought you were having breakfast with us this morning."

"Mom, I had to wake up at seven to meet Jisoo here. I would have had to get up at five am for breakfast."

"It doesn't hurt to get up early now and then. You're staying over tonight, right?"

I hesitated.

"Don't tell me you're rushing back to school to do who-knows-what, with Rosé." My mother always pronounced Rosé's name like it tasted bad. "Spend some time with your family."

There would probably be digs about my weight, and comparisons between me and Jisoo, and a lot of wedding talk. But none of that mattered right now. I felt like I was floating.

"Okay, Mom. I will. I'll make you guys dinner."

"How's Kai?"

My stomach tightened, and I let out a breath. "I'm sure he's just fine. I see him in Student Senate. He had a show last night."

"You went?"

"Yeah, I was there. It wasn't a big deal. We're broken up, Mom. We've been over since winter break."

"Yes, and he was so worried about you. Dad and I appreciated that he took the time to call."

I shook off the reminder. Kai had visited over summer vacation and impressed my parents with his manners and ambition. After the breakup, he called them to explain how very concerned he was about me. Drinking, partying, quitting cheer squad — like he didn't get thrashed on the weekends. That fucking phone call had cost me a lot of effort in damage control.

"There's nothing to worry about."

"Well, all I can say is, the way the two of you were, we thought you'd be following in your sister's footsteps very soon."

"Kai?" I spluttered. Shaking with laughter, I grabbed a rack of dresses for support, earning another glare from the saleswoman. "You thought me and Kai were going to— oh, that's hilarious."

"Jennie!" my mother reproved. "Get a hold of yourself. You could do a lot worse. That boy might be the best you'll get."

"Whatever," I coughed.

"Don't be rude."

Like I was a kid. My parents were all for independence — except when they weren't. Some of my good mood evaporated.

"Sorry," I mumbled.

"Think about it, Jennie. He has a lot going for him. He's polite, handsome, with a good future…"

"Better than Haein's amazing cousin?" I chirped.

She exhaled. "Fine. You do what you want. But may I remind you, we still haven't seen your grades from last semester."

"Oh, right," I said vaguely. "Sorry about that. I'll send them to you."

"It's been almost two months. They came out in December, didn't they?"

"End of December. Sorry. I keep forgetting."

"I don't know why colleges don't mail grades home anymore. Of course, with your sister, we never had to worry. Straight A's all the way through."

"I know, Mom. You don't have to worry about me either."

Jisoo glided out of the dressing room like a full-feathered swan while the saleswoman fluttered around her. She caught my eye and gave me an encouraging smile.

"Okay," my mother said. "I hope we can trust you. Make us proud, baby. Love you." She blew me a kiss over the phone.

"Love you too." I hung up.

My parents called me "baby," though God forbid I ever act like one. Jisoo was "princess." If you asked them, they'd swear they called me princess too.

The check landed on the cafe table between our plates, and I slid it toward me.

I was still figuring out my duties as maid of honor and sister of the bride. And I was trying to pull back from being Pizza Girl. But buying my sister lunch after a morning at the bridal shop seemed like a no-brainer.

"I got yours," I told Jisoo, as she fished her wallet out of her purse.

"Thank you so much." She beamed as I laid the bills down. I kept the one with Lisa's message. Her eyes drifted toward my bulging wallet. "Honey…" Her voice dropped to a whisper. "You're carrying a lot of cash."

I snapped my wallet shut and put it away. "So? It's easier to keep track of that way."

"Did you get a new job this semester?" She looked at me expectantly. "I didn't know."

"Just little things here and there. Odd jobs," I mumbled. Lucas flashed through my mind, showing me his calendar in the snow, asking too many questions. "There's this guy at school — I clean his apartment sometimes."

"You're working as a housecleaner?" Jisoo looked startled.

"Hey, it's honest work." I popped my sandwich crust into my mouth. I was such a liar.

"You're right." She looked remorseful and squeezed my hand. "Girl, let's set aside some time for us before the wedding. Just you and me. This morning has been so fun, but I'd love to really talk."

I swallowed the last of my mocha. "Absolutely."

As the server took the check, my sister pulled out her phone, scrolling through her calendar. "We can do two weeks from now…no, not that weekend. How about the end of February…oh, I'm sorry. I have a Women in Law retreat."

Always Jisoo's schedule. Always on her terms.

"I have a lot going on too." I whipped out my phone, pulling up my calendar. It was dotted with commitments and appointments, but it wasn't jammed the way it used to be. My choice, I reminded myself. "How about one of the weekends of spring break? March 15, March 22—"

"Ugh, no, I'm so sorry. Last weekend in April? That's the only time I can do it."

"Jisoo, that weekend is literally in the middle of finals. We start on Thursday and end the next Wednesday."

"Just one night, then. Friday. I know — I'll visit you at school! It'll be so fun — like being in college again. That way, you don't have to drive anywhere. You'll be studying so hard, you'll deserve a break. But I know you, honey, you're going to be on top of everything anyway."

"Can we do Saturday instead?"

She shook her head apologetically. "I don't think so…I already have this thing…"

"Fine, Friday." I put the date in my calendar.

"Perfect!" she said. "I'm glad we can do it before the summer. Once I'm a summer associate it'll be even busier than law school, and I'm sure you'll be busy with an internship too."

The server handed back my change, and I counted out a tip. "Probably. I haven't looked yet."

"Jennie!" Jisoo gasped and clutched my arm. People in the cafe turned to look. "It's February. You need to apply now. The summer before senior year is the most important! This is how you get a job after you graduate. This is your life." She shook my arm. "It's okay, honey, it's not too late. You just need to get on it right away. I'll help you."

"Don't," I said without thinking.

Jisoo blinked, her eyes widening. Her face fell, and I felt like the worst sister in the world. Then she brightened and patted my arm.

"You're right. You need to do this on your own. I keep forgetting that you're not my baby sister anymore. But I'm just a phone call away if you need me."

"Thanks," I murmured, thumbing through my calendar because it was hard to look at her right now. "That means a lot."

Jisoo leaned over. "What's that?"

She pointed to a purple bar on Monday. Lisa, was all it said. Repeated every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.

"Nothing." Casually, slowly, like I was dealing with a dangerous animal, I closed my calendar and put my phone in my purse.

"Lisa? She's the one?"

I nodded.

"You guys have a schedule?"

"She's busy too. Really busy."

"Oh?" Her face lit up with interest. "Tell me. I want to know everything about her."

God, what did Lisa do with her time? Did I even want to know? "She's majoring in economics," I babbled, "and she works out like a maniac. She's on the wrestling team and she's super involved with her frat. She also likes to paint. She can do it for hours. Oh, and community service, obviously. We need to have a schedule just to make sure we see each other. You know how it is."

"I do," she sighed. "I wish I could see Haein more. Sometimes it feels like—"

"Like what?"

"I just wish—" she began, and shook her head. "Anyway," she went on. "It'll be amazing when we're finally married. I saw you have Lisa on your calendar until the end of the semester. It's so sweet that you want to commit to her. And Valentine's Day is coming up this Wednesday! Perfect timing. What are you going to do?"

I fiddled with my napkin and crumpled it in a ball. "I'm sure she has a surprise planned. She's full of surprises."

"Awww. And what are you guys doing over the summer?"

"I don't know," I murmured. "I don't know anything about the summer."