A/N: I started this fanfic Friday morning so Bill would shut up (I'll get there in a sec) and so I have NO idea how many reviews I will have pulled in by the time it's finished (Yes, I do the author notes before and after writing, so that it fits. Well kinda.
Also... For the moment at least, I have a gosling! It was mouthed by a dog and the other geese kicked it, and people told me to kill it, but I kept it. Sadistic bastards :grumble: So yeh... at the moment we're just seeing if Bill will survive the weekend (I LEAVE FOR CAMP IN AN HOUR AND A HALF! WOOO) and hoping he's okay with our dogs and cats. He should be. He woke me up at friggin' 6 AM to feed him. So I think that means he's fine. He really is a gorgeous thing - all yellow and brown fuzz, and he makes the most adorable squeaky peeping sound - and he adores listening to the sound of me typing :shrug: he stopped crying when I started typing on a forum earlier, then started, so I figured that typing some more fanfic was the best bit. Dweeem time...
When Artemis Lost His Brain - Dreamin' 2
Artemis was clinging gently to Holly, breathing lightly in his sleep. His hair was splayed this way and that, and he looked like a totally different person than the one he was during the day. Or maybe he was that person during the day, only it was subdued by his intellect and sarcasm. In any case, he looked adorable.
"Oh Artemis..." The voice called seductively. I sat up, looking over at her. She was in the kitchen, cooking something that smelled delicious. She turned to face me, a teasing smile on her face.
"Like it?" She asked. She was wearing a small sheer dress that I could -almost- see through. Smirking at my shocked expression, she slunk over to me, making every inch of me tremble. She crawled along the bed, until she was sitting on my crotch, nose to my nose.
Holly whispered to me two words; "Help me." And then she kissed me and it all vanished.
I was sitting in a room. It was dark, and I could tell that mine was the only chair. The only door from the room had bars on, and I crossed to it forlornly, peeking through the bars to see her sitting there in her prison.
She looked up to me, eyes full of tears. "Save me." She begged. I watched her drag herself over to the bars, her stunningly hazel eyes never leaving mine.
"I can't." I replied apologetically. "I don't have the key."
"Yes you do." She whispered. "Find the key in your heart to set me free." And somehow, through the bars, her lips found mine...
It was Artemis' turn to be snapped out of a dream, though he didn't shout for Holly. Instead he wondered what the foreign object in his bed was - and why it was there. He knew where the headache came from - He must have had too much to drink, but it didn't explain... Holly?'s presence in his bed. He tried to de-tangle himself but Holly pulled him closer, whimpering ever-so-slightly. That adorable sound alone was enough for Artemis to put his arms around Holly without a second thought, and hold her until she awoke.
000
Holly, of course, was asleep. Her hair clung to her head, and she clung tightly to Artemis, as if letting go would mean letting go of life. She was constantly trying to get closer to him without reducing her grip, so she was all bunched up to him.
"Holly? Are you awake?" He smiled into my face.
I yawned. "Yeah, I'm awake. Because you woke me."
He laughed. "Didn't I tell you last night what I was planning to do to you this morning?"
"Oooh, let me wake up first. I need to stretch, and pee."
He chuckled. "At least let me give you your morning kiss." Artemis leaned right in to me, until I could almost taste his breath. He breathed "Save me." And as his lips touched mine, the dream vanished.
There he was. Locked in a cage, dangling a few feet from the floor. I raced over to the cage, pulling desperately at the padlock.
"Help me." He called desperately. His face was a mess, all covered in dirt and scrapes, his suit was gone, replaced by a dirty torn shirt and jeans, and his hair was messed up all over the place. He really looked the part of a prisoner.
"I'm trying!" I said exasperatedly, tugging harder now.
He shook his head. "That won't do anything."
"Then what DO I do, smart boy?" I yelled.
"Look in your heart." He kissed me, and it was gone.
Holly woke up kicking, punching and shrieking blindly. Artemis yelped, getting out of the way and covering her mouth. "Shh."
Holly calmed down, realising the situation. "Why the heck are you in my bed?" She asked, smoothing her hair with her hand.
"Technically you're in mine. You were clinging to me so hard that I couldn't get you off."
"So what - you carried me all the way to bed?"
"No, I was asleep too. I just woke up before you. I assume Butler put us here, after failing to prise us apart."
Holly smiled slightly at the thought. "Something like that." She rubbed her head.
Artemis blinked. "Hangover?"
"Yeah... I have a smaller body, and your alcohol is stronger... oww, I must have been smashed." She moaned slightly, stretching. "You feeling alright mud boy?"
Artemis nodded. "I'm Artemis Fowl. I don't have hangovers." He eyed her sceptically. "Of course my head hurts, silly." He rubbed it.
"Not used to alcohol, are you mud boy?" She smirked, punching his shoulder slightly.
He sighed, rubbing it. "I'm fifteen, of course not. And can you please stop doing that?"
"Sorry." Holly grinned sheepishly. "Old habits die hard."
"Just don't hit Butler, he hits back by sheer force of habit." Artemis said seriously. Holly laughed.
"So what was so big that it woke you up?" Artemis asked.
"Uh... It was odd. I was... uh... Well..." She wondered what to say.
Artemis eyed her. "I probably had the same sort of dream. So go ahead." He raised an eyebrow.
Holly couldn't help laughing. "Actually dreaming about girls now too? Wow, puberty must be hitting pretty hard."
Artemis sighed and nodded. "The dream, Holly?"
"Oh yeah. I was on a bed and you woke me up and we talked and..." She turned deep red. "It was the weirdest thing."
Artemis sighed. "We can skip over the kissing." His cheeks were tinged pink. Holly contemplated teasing him about this, but then she remembered that she was redder than he was.
"Well... after that, you were in a cage, and wanted me to rescue you, but I didn't know how. Then you told me to look into my heart, and I woke up." She shrugged. "It was strange. What about you?"
Artemis shrugged lightly. "Similar, except you were in a jail, not a cage. And you said something about a key." He sighed. "I don't know if it means anything or not."
Holly sighed, eyes drooping. "Neither do I... And I find that I can't care right now." Her eyes shut completely, and she unconsciously wrapped her arms around Artemis. Artemis couldn't help but smile and return the gesture, falling asleep five minutes later.
A/N: Holy goose poo, it's Tuesday, and I have 46 reviews. I am completely, utterly stoked. This chapter doesn't appeal to me as much, but I hope people like it. I'll start on chapter 5 ASAP.
RiverWren: Haha... Butler - the ultimate mood killer.
VanillaApple: Lol, thanks
Hello: I want to get a printing machine and make it... XD
Marik: Thanks!
fluffyrachel: Yeah, I'm so mean to Butler. Don't ask why. I just love embarassing him.
Summerset: I wonder, if enough people hate her, maybe Colfer will kill her off... :D
Catslove17: Yep!
Neatsue: Thanks for reading!
AgiVega: Mwahaha...
mike: Um... okay... thanks, I guess.
AAA: I'm not cruel :)
hollybridgetpeppermint: Nuu! Don't stop reading! Hehe... The let's kill Minerva club. How awesome.
fallen in snow: Mmm... plastic spoon... that has potential. A plastic spork would do even worse damage though.
tigster5: Haha... I didn't think I had advanced the plot at all... it's still pretty haywire in my mind.
Dreamlights: Haha... the pyjamas rule.
Rachelbuntaro: Yeah, I have to admit that was kinda dumb of him, what with Artemis' ever-advancing hormones.
ChocolateIsMyDrug: OMG I love your name. Yeah, come back and read once you have TLC... it must suck having to wait until after exams!
-Love-You-Always-And-Forever-: Yay for tandel! My face is still bright red... ugh. I hate sunburn. Wish I could tan like that. Lucks with the French oral exam thingy! (Or was that this morning? hmmmm... I can't remember. EMO GUY!)
AnimeJunkie111: i wouldnt want 2 make u mad at me, heres another chapter! (sorry, I just love making fun of chat speak. It gets on my nerves no end.)
Wow. Awesome. So many, many reviews. It's like an orgy of reviews. (We were having fake orgies at camp this weekend XD It was hilarious. Ahh, good times.)
And now I have to go clean up goose poo. REVIEW!