AN: Guys, I am so sorry this is late. I had...a really bad week. You see, I suffer from very bad depression, an anxiety disorder, and there's a big possibility that I'm bipolar, too, I just haven't gotten tested for it. Of course, I've already mentioned my self-injury. I was getting better, but then one of my best friends disappeared on Monday. Like, he dropped out of school, he left home, no one has any idea where he is. They think there's a good chance he might not come back. He was my lifeline. When I felt really bad, I called him, and he would talk me out of hurting myself. So when he left, I cracked. I tried to kill myself. I spent two days in the hospital with blood being pumped into me while my mom stood by sobbing about how she 'never knew it was so bad'. It's a miracle that she's letting me near the computer. This chapter probably sucks ass, but it's all I could manage. I'm sorry.

Disclaimer: It's not mine, people.

Chapter 21: Another Option

I had been in the shrieking shack for about three days when someone decided to drop in. I was startled, but it only took me a few seconds before I recovered.

"Professor Lupin. So nice to see you. I wasn't expecting any guests, so I'm afraid I don't have any tea to offer you."

He stared at me for a moment before letting out an amuse chuckle. Then he remembered who he was talking to and began to shift nervously.

"Harry. What are you doing here? You should be in the castle."

"I'm biding my time before I leave to go join Voldemort."

I mentally gave him points for not screaming and attacking me right away.

"When they found Snape, everyone was scared to death. Then we found out that you were missing. And they decided that Death Eaters had killed him so that they could take you to their master."

"So you came up here to find me because...?"

"Because, I am a werewolf. Heightened sense of smell, you know. I didn't smell any Death Eaters. Harry...did you kill him?"

I started clapping. "Well done," I announced sarcastically. "You figured it out. Someone give the man a prize."

"Why?"

"Because he was bugging me."

"But his face...he was ripped to shreds! How could you have done that?"

"Well," I said. "I happen to have claws that are very good for ripping people to shreds."

I lifted my hand and unsheathed my claws for him. He took a step back.

"You aren't human anymore."

I laughed, perhaps somewhat sadly. "That's for sure."

"How did it happen?"

"Remember when we 'faked my death'?"

He nodded.

"There was no faking at all. I was totally dead for two weeks."

He was handling it rather well, actually. "That still doesn't explain...this." He gestured at me, referring to my inhumanity.

"Of course not. That's only half the story. You see...after two weeks, I woke up. And like I told Dumbledore, next time I die, don't bury me in a marble tomb with three-foot-thick walls and an unbreakable door. That made it a lot harder for me to get out."

"Wait...you came back to life?"

"I didn't say that, did I? No, I am still quite dead. No breathing, I don't have to eat, drink, any of that. And, I have heightened senses like you wouldn't believe. Plus my eyes glow and I grow claws when I'm mad, and when I'm provoked I fly into a homicidal rage and kill the nearest life form, far as I can tell."

He was clearly trying not to start screaming. I had to give him credit for that.

"...Is there anything else you want to tell me?"

I thought for a moment.

"Actually, yes. I've been screwing Draco Malfoy since September."

He blinked once. Then again.

"You've been...screwing...Malfoy?"

"Yes, Draco Malfoy. Since September."

"I think I need to sit down."

He sat down. Then he closed his eyes. And leaned back, like he was going to go to sleep.

"Are you okay?"

He shook his head.

"No. I came up here expecting to find you scared to death at the thought of Azkaban, sobbing at the thought that you had actually killed someone, or that you had seen yet another person killed, and instead I find...this."

"It is a lot to take in."

He sat up, his eyes shining with determination.

"You can't join Voldemort, Harry."

I snorted. "And why not? What other choice is there? Azkaban? I don't think so."

"Do those who have already died matter so little?"

I snarled at him.

"Don't you dare bring them up. Of course they matter. They died because of me, didn't they?"

"No! They didn't die because of you! They died because of the person that you plan to join, unless I can talk you out of it."

I snorted.

"You're very bad at being persuasive, Lupin."

He sighed. "What can I do to cange you mind, then?"

"You could offer me another option."

"How about what we did for Sirius? We kept him out of Azkaban."

"Yeah, the second time around. And he still died."

"Well...how about-"

"How about, 'shut up'? I don't want to listen to you scrambling around for ideas. Go away."

"No."

I stopped, and took a good look at him. It was clear that he was full of resolve and misguided hopes for my salvation. I wanted him gone.

"You realise that I could kill you just as easily as I killed him?"

"Yes," He paused, then continued. "But I know that you won't. Because you're not evil."

"And how would you know that, Lupin? What gives you that unshakable trust in me? Because I have to tell you, it is poorly placed. I am no longer a trustworthy person."

"You been nothing but truthful since I got here. You have threatened me, you have insulted me, and you have ordered me to go away, but you haven't lied."

"...Your point?"

"I think you would make a great leader, Harry, but you would never be good at bowing down-to anyone. I know that I don't know you that well, and I regret that, I really do, but already I feel that I could trust you with my life."

I laughed bitterly.

"Your life? I could care less about my own life, why would I care about yours?"

"And yet you have not said that you don't."

I looked at him once again, considering. What did I feel toward this man, who had as much as saved my life when I was thirteen, but had disappeared as quickly as he had arrived? He was right, I did care whether he lived or died, but beyond that? I could no longer tell. Too much had changed in a mere fifteen minutes.

"What are you suggesting, Lupin? I think I have an idea, but I'm hoping that you'll prove me wrong."

"I am suggesting that you create your own side."

"And how would I go about doing that?"

"Well...first you would need some followers."

"How would I get followers? Put an ad in the Prophet?"

"No. But I can think of a few right off the bat."

"Who?"

"Well...me. And Ron. He cares a lot for you, I know. And I think that Luna Lovegood would be a good person to consider. And, of course, depending on how much you think you can trust him..."

"Well?"

"Draco Malfoy?"

I sat up, alert. "He is a loyal servant of Lord Voldemort. Why would he risk his life to join some misguided cause, even if it is led by his...by me?"

Lupin gave me an almost pitying look, as if he knew some deep truth that I was unaware of.

"He's been...different, since you disappeared."

I was instantly worried. Different meant bad, when it came to Draco.

"How so?"

"He's paler than ever, and he looks faint, like he could collapse at any minute. I...I smell blood every time I'm near him. I think that he may be hurting himself."

I probably would have paled, if I was not aready as white as death.

"I want you to bring him up here. As soon as possible. I don't care what you tell him, just get him to me."

"But-"

"Everything else later. I promise, I'll think about what you said. Now go!"

And I practically threw him into the passage before falling to the floor, drained.