1997.10.12

Entry 8

October is flying by just as September crawled by. I'm not sure which I like better yet. I know that in a few years, I'll look back and say it went by too fast, but right now, I'm liking the fast pace of things.

The fast pace doesn't let Harry think too much about the war and Voldemort. I think he likes that as well. I like to see him happy and joking, even if he still is biting his lip and looking at the ceiling. I wish he'd stop that and ask Ginny out already.

That's the only thing going slow, Harry and Ron. They're so afraid to go out on a limb with girls, I don't understand it. Ron's afraid to ask Susan to Hogsmeade, and I have no clue why. Ron's been on plenty of dates, I don't know why he's so shy about Susan.

And Harry! He's dated too, my friend. Cho and Padma and the occasional girl that asks him out and he feels bad for. He takes them up to the Astronomy tower under his cloak and shows them a good time. Well, he did last year, this year the only thing he does with girls is talk to them and try not to smile at them too much. I think he's tired of the attention, well, I know he's tired of it. He always has disliked the attention, most of it anyway.

He is rather sweet, even if he's a little daft. He heard me screaming last night and came running into my room.

: Hermione screamed again, her eyes shut tight as she dreamed. Her voice carried all the way to Harry's room, but he wasn't there. He burst through the panel, not caring if Hermione was naked or got angry with him. He ran to her bed where she lay, twisting and turning and screaming.

He cupped her jaw in one of his hands with a soft smile before whispering, "Hermione," and when she didn't wake up he said it again, louder. He stroked her hair softly, not caring about the beads of sweat across her face.

She stopped screaming and moving and her eyes shot open, they were filled with tears. She looked at Harry with complete shock and then pulled him into her, burying her head in his shoulder, not taking notice to the fact that it was completely bare.

A few tears fell and slid down his back as she held him tightly, his arms wrapped tightly around his body as well. She sniffed and pulled back slowly, looking into his eyes, their lips dangerously close. Hermione didn't notice Harry's cheeks turning a soft shade of pink in the darkness.

Harry caressed her face and pulled away. He lit a candle beside her bed, which cast an eerie but bright like upon the room, including himself. He conjured a cup of cold water and handed it to her.

She took the water and drank it, taking the time to look at Harry. He was once again wearing those cotton pants that were dangerously close to falling off, displaying his perfectly toned stomach and that alluring v that made Hermione's lower stomach tingle. Hermione noticed, too, the small strip of dark hair that raced down his stomach and this time ended in a partially exposed patch of equally dark hair. Her stomach tingled even more and she quickly drew her eyes back up to Harry's eyes.

The tears still soaked her eyes and Harry gave her a comforting smile, "Would you like me to stay?" he asked. "I'll sleep on the couch."

Hermione smiled at him, happy to have such a great friend. "Yes, please stay," she paused, "but you can sleep in the bed," she paused again, "with me." She didn't want anything more than to feel Harry's warm comforting body against hers and she hoped he understood that, understood it was nothing more than a wish for comfort.

"Are you sure?" Harry asked softly.

"Yeah," Hermione said with a smile before pushing the blankets down, revealing her smooth uncovered legs. She slid over, leaving space for Harry to climb in, biting his lip. Hermione didn't notice his closed eyes and his teeth clenching his lip tightly as he climbed into the bed then turned the lamp off.

Hermione moved a little closer to Harry and pulled him into a hug, and watched him as he practiced his Occlumency. His breathing fell into a steady rhythm before he actually fell asleep, and his chest would rise and fall in a manner that drew Hermione's attention. Hermione enjoyed the moment, just watching his chest rise and fall and occasionally feel his breath on her face, it felt right and comfortable to her. :

He woke me up and then stayed the night with me, keeping me company like any good friend would. I thought it was sweet of him to stay in my room, to hold me while I was still scared from that horrible nightmare.

The nightmare was horrible, too. I dreamed that Harry had died, been murdered by Voldemort. He'd held his dead body in my arms, his lips tinged with bits of blood, his eyes hanging lifelessly open.

It felt so real, and I'm glad it was Harry that came into my room after that. If Ron had come it wouldn't have been as nice as Harry being there, considering Harry was the one I'd seen killed.

I think I might ask Harry to teach me Occluemency so that I don't have those nightmares anymore, but I don't think I'd like to give up my dreams. I love those enough to deal with the occasional nightmare.

It was still sweet of Harry, but I still think he's acting strange! I swear that boy will never be normal until he asks Ginny out, but what do I know? That's what he'd say if I said something, I know that.

I wonder if Ron knows that Harry likes Ginny, he's constantly telling Harry something, but I only catch bits and pieces. Sometimes he says, "Just do it, mate," or "Never know," or "Don't be a wanker," or, my personal favorite, "I'll kiss Snape before you have any courage." I suppose it's a bit odd, considering all the things Harry's done, Ron poking fun at his courage. Ron's stood up to his fair share of things as well, but it's not Harry making fun of him.

If Ron knew, I wonder if he'd push Harry to go after Ginny. He might just think its some girl, or he might know its Ginny. He'd probably be glad that Ginny would be with his best mate, someone he could trust. Or he'd hate it, he might hate that Ginny came in and took his best mate from him. Ron isn't that selfish though, so he might just be happy for the two.

However, I don't think he does know, because I've never heard him say Ginny's name. He always just says her, but maybe he does know and they're just keeping it from me. Maybe Harry doesn't want me to know he likes Ginny for some odd reason, and if he does I'd like to know the reason.

It's not as if I'm not trustworthy that Harry should hide that he has feelings for Ginny! Just because she's my best girl friend doesn't mean I'd tell her his secrets, I'd never betray him! He should know that by now!

He does trust me with his parent's notes, however. He's shown me another.

: Harry knocked and waited patiently for Hermione to open the panel before he gave her his usual smile and "Oy, Hermione." He didn't walk over to the couch this time, he smiled and stood where he was, looking down at his friend.

"Knut for your thoughts," Hermione joked as she looked up at him.

Harry smiled back and dropped out of his trance, "Sorry, you're just so beautiful," he said sarcastically before walking over to the couch slowly. He waited for her to catch up and they fell onto the couch together. He handed her a piece of parchment.

Hullo! Lils, you look stunning!

Sod off, Potter.

Now, now, Prefects should really observe a less offensive language. You're not setting a good example you see. What are Sirius and I to think?

Again, sod off.

Now, really Evans, you should try and set a better example, for me. –Sirius

p.s. and Prongs as well as we both know he could use some sense knocked into him.

Sod off, both of you.

Now, Lils, can you do nothing more than repeat yourself? And I do not.

Do too.

If you two like, I'll leave you alone to bicker like the old married couple you are.

We're not old and you see, we got a divorce last Wednesday, because I'm in love with you.

Really, Prongs, if you'd loved me you'd remember that it was Tuesday.

I love Lily.

I, you do?

Always have!

Well, um, sod off anyway.

Hermione laughed, not knowing that Harry was watching her read the night with a bright smile spread across his face. He lit up when she laughed, and smiled wider. "Suppose she's warming up to him then," Harry said with a smile. :

I do love James and Lily and of course Sirius! I miss them so much and I barely know them! James is so sweet, and Lily, I can just see her wearing down from note to note. It's very romantic, and Sirius being the person he was. The person we never really got to know.

Sirius seemed so playful, so joking. He was more serious after Azkaban, but I suppose the constant feeling of Dementors around does that to you. I don't like it though, I wish I'd gotten the chance to know the real Sirius. I want to know the Sirius that joked and was a heartbreaker and was just a careless boy.

More than that, however, I wish, for Harry, he was still here.