-1AN- Thanks again for the feedback, sorry this chapter was a bit slower lots od Christmas stuff going on at the minute.
Chapter 9 - Obstacles
Sara sat at her desk a huge smile across her features, her mind drifted to Catherine
' Who would have though that 3 years would pass and the chemistry would still be there, that we could still have a chance to be together, is that what Catherine wanted to? Did she want to make a go of things see if we could be together…… but how she lives in Vegas…….. I live in Boston, would she be willing to give up her work for me…. Would I be willing to leave everything I have here and move back to Vegas, to face the people I hurt, I abandoned, I left behind. What about Grissom, what about Lizzie? Me and Catherine haven't discussed this major issue yet and I'm dredging the discussion because now I have no doubt in my mind that Grissom must meet his daughter. Will Catherine understand this, will it hurt her if I rebuild a friendship with Grissom, Will she support me, will she understand, If we do get a chance will she accept my daughter as her own. What about Lindsey will she welcome our relationship will she welcome Me and Lizzie into her family'
Sara's head felt like it was going to explode as so many questions and worries ran through her mind. She could feel the tears well behind her eyes as she heard a knock at the door.
Sara wiped her eyes and walked over to the door. She opened the door to discover Catherine stood before her with a sleeping Lizzie in her stroller. Sara smiled and stepped back to allow Catherine to enter the office.
Pushing the stroller into the office Catherine stopped and turned around to face Sara. She smiled at the brunette and the brunette smiled back before Catherine claimed the younger women's lips as her own. The kiss was sweet and delicate, but Catherine could sense Sara's discomfort, something just wasn't right.
Catherine stood before Sara and lifted the brunette women's head so that there eyes made contact
"Sar, what's wrong?"
"Nothing Cat don't worry just a little overwhelmed, that's all"
"it's not Sara something going on, your worrying about something I know you Sidle, now come on tell me what's wrong, remember where being honest with each other from now, so spill"
"I'm scared Catherine……………… I'm scared that there's too many obstacles to overcome, I'm scared about Lindsey's reaction to us, I'm scared of…………. Having to face Grissom….. About Lizzie. But most of all I'm scared of losing you again, I need you Catherine and I love you so much, I don't want to have you for a little while and loose you again it will hurt to much I can't do it" Sara sobbed freely now as Catherine pulled her in to her arms.
"Sara listen to me I love you and I'm not going anywhere. Lindsey already knows about us, well she at least knows I wanted there to be an us, she knows I love you and she knows that I was here to see you to tell you how I felt. Grissom….. I can't lie Sara it hurt's me to know that Lizzie is his child. It hurts to know that he gave you something….. Someone so special and to know no matter what happens she will always be yours and his child. But Sara I want to be part of her life, I want to know her to care for her, and just the fact that she is your child I already love her as I love my own daughter. And I do think it's important that Grissom meets her and gets to see his daughter….. As much as I hate to say this Grissom is a good man and he would make an amazing father"
Catherine was sobbing too and the brunette women tightened her hold of the blonde as both women clung to one another tightly allowing the tears and the doubt flow from there body. Sara was the first to break the silence she looked into Catherine's eyes.
"I love you Catherine Willows" she said placing a soft kiss on the older women's forehead
"And I love you Sara Sidle" Catherine said placing a chaste kiss on Sara's lips.
"Now Sidle, I think you promised me and my new friend here dinner" Catherine indicated to the sleeping baby in the stroller.
"That I did now come on lets go home" Sara kissed the Childs forehead and then kissed Catherine's cheek before collecting her things and locking her room up.
Catherine walked into the hallway pushing the stroller and Sara followed.
Catherine pushed the stroller through the door as Sara held onto the handle both Women smiled as they made small talk as they walked out of the building
"Mom!"
Catherine looked around to see her daughter approaching
"hey honey" Catherine said smiling at her daughter
"Sooo I take it things went well" Lindsey enquired as she looked between both women
"Yes I think you can say things went very well" Catherine smiled as she looked between her mother and her daughter.
"So where you going?"
Sara answered this question "Your mom's coming over to my place for dinner………. If you want to Linds your more than welcome to come to?" Sara said feeling a little unsure of her self.
"Thanks for the offer Sara but I'm going out with Torri tonight maybe another time? Plus I don't wanna sit there watching you and my Mom feeling each other up"
Both Catherine and Sara blushed at this comment as Lindsey smiled and laughed.
"And that's my queue to leave, Have a good night….. And don't do anything I wouldn't do" the young blonde said as she smirked before walking off
Sara and Catherine stood frozen for several minutes
"Well that's safe to say that Linds is ok with things" Catherine stated
"I think that's very safe to say" Sara smiled
"Come on lets go home Cat"
"You read my mind"
Both women continued there journey to the car.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
After dinner Catherine sat on the sofa with Lizzie curled up into her side. Her hand clinging to the women's arm as she watched the cartoon animals on the TV. Catherine smiled at the simple gesture from the child and watched the Childs features as she watched the TV. The Childs expression changed when different characters came on screen, it appeared that Lizzie loved the pig and whenever she saw the character her face lit up and a smile crept across her small features. Whenever the owl came on screen Lizzie's features changed again, she didn't seem very fond of this character and just looked blankly at the screen and whenever the owl made a sound she would tighten her grip on Catherine's arm.
Sara walked into the living room and smiled as she saw the interaction between Catherine and Lizzie. She saw that Lizzie had curled into Catherine's side and was holding Catherine's arm as she watched TV. Sara could also see the smile and fascination she saw on Catherine's face as she looked between the TV and Lizzie. Sara didn't want to interrupt the pair but she knew it was time that Lizzie got to bed.
"Right Honey it's time to go to bed" Sara said as she approached the sofa. Lizzie pouted her lip and looked at her mother with puppy dog eyes, before clinging into Catherine's side
Cath smiled as she watched the exchange between mother and daughter, Lizzie was such an adorable child, so much like her mother.
"Hey Lizzie, how about I take you up to bed and if it's ok with your Mom I'll read you a story?"
"Cath you don't need to do that"
"I want to Sara if it's ok with you?"
"It's fine with me" Sara said smiling at the blonde women
"Cafareen read me a story" Lizzie smiled and knelt on the sofa beside Catherine
"Come on then Munchkin lets get you ready for bed" Catherine said lifting Lizzie from the sofa. Catherine carried Lizzie upstairs and Sara followed, showing Catherine to Lizzie's room.
"I'll go make some coffee" Sara smiled, she kissed her daughter goodnight and kissed Catherine on the cheek
"I love you" she whispered to Catherine as she left the room.
Catherine got Lizzie ready for bed and tucked the child in.
She sat beside the child and read snow white until the child drifted off. Kissing Lizzie's forehead she turned the lamp of beside the bed and turned the Childs night light on
"Good night angel" She whispered as she left the room.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Sara was sat on the sofa looking at a photo album as Catherine approached the sofa.
Catherine looked over to see what Sara was looking at, there she was a picture of her and Sara on one side and a photo of the CSI team on the other.
"I remember that picture being taken" she said distracting Sara's observation "It was Christmas 2002 we had a Christmas party at the lad, I remember Greg asking to take it and you being so reluctant to put your arms around me, but Greg insisted we get closer and smile. I remember how good it felt in your arms"
Catherine sat down beside Sara resting her head on Sara's shoulder. Sara took the comment as a hint and placed her arm around Catherine pulling her closer.
"I remember too, the reason I was so scared of putting my arms around you is because I knew how much I would enjoy it, and expected to make a fool of myself. I could smell your perfume and I felt you relax into my arms I remember feeling so happy at that moment and wanted to stay there forever………….. And 5 seconds later Grissom interrupted to say we had a DB over at Lake Mead"
"I remember" Catherine said as she stroked Sara's arm.
"Cat we need to talk" Sara said looking at Catherine with a serious face.
"I know we do…… the question is where do we begin?"
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The next chapter will cover a lot of things if it goes to plan. But it never turns out the way I plan it too, but I plan on answering a lot of questions in the next chapter. I hope
