Disclaimer: I just asked my boyfriend if he though Santa would give me Grey's Anatomy for Christmas. He said there was no such thing as Santa, so I called him Cristina. And than he said Santa couldn't give GA to people for Christmas as there is only one GA. I guess he's right about that but such a butt head for breaking my hopes and dreams. I really want Santa to give me GA.

I can't think of anything to say as I just wrote a chapter. Remember...kind of coming to a slow close. This email is sent 2 weeks after the IM chapter, so now it's down to 2 months until Derek gets home. So the baby is 5 months along.

Enjoy!

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Derek,

You should get online to see me sometime soon.

According to Addison I popped.

According to me, the neuro resident, I went to bed last night looking kind of pregnant and woke up this morning looking really pregnant. I have this big round belly that seemingly came out of no where.

Also according to Addison my stomach wouldn't look so big and round if I wasn't so small and tiny.

I know you and Addison are working on this whole being friends thing, since you have both moved on so well after that mess that you called a marriage, and I know you were probably hoping that I to would be friends with Addison. But right now I don't like her that much. It's all Meredith this...and Meredith that. She thinks she knows everything. She's a know it all. A very bossy know it all. And everytime I get like well me...she laughs and gives me a sympathetic look.

I don't like her.

Oh yes, according to Addison BabyShep should have been kicking already. At least a little.

But no BaybShep has yet to kick me. Not even a little.

Of course according to Addison we shouldn't be worried. Addison did an ultrasound and everything looks fine. And the fact she's moving is good. According to Addison BabyShep is probably just a docile little baby who doesn't feel the need to kick her mother as much as some.

And I can hear you laughing and asking why I'm upset that we seemingly have a healthy baby. I'm upset because once again Addison was McKnowitall.

How did you two stand to live in the same house? She's a know it all. You're a know it all. How did you not kill eachother?

Never mind, I don't think I want to know.

I also hate penguins.

Because today I feel like a penguin. Since this big round belly appeared over night I've been waddling around everywhere. It's unattractive and it hurts my feet. I'm not a fan of the waddling.

Yes, I'm hormonal.

I'm also craving Chinese food.

I hate Chinese food.

And the only reason I'm not being all hormonal over you is because you're home in two months. That one third of the time you were there for. And today, I'm feeling really good about that. We've done 4 months, we can do another two. It's going to be easy.

And my belief that is actually going to be easy is probably another symptom of my hormones. As I may or may not be going crazy.

I'm 5 months pregnant, Derek. I can go crazy.

I'm 5 months pregnant with a baby that I didn't even know I wanted until it was there. 5 months pregnant with a baby that wasn't even in my plans until you were there and changing all my plans. And as much as I hate the big round belly, I wouldn't want it any other way. God Derek, I want this so much. I want you and this baby so much.

I'm used to wanting things, I'm just not used to getting the things I want.

However, I've decided that we're not having another child until they figure out how to let men carry children. And then you can carry the next BabyShep.

And I'm horny. I'm fat, bloated, sore, tired...and horny. And according to McKnowitall that's a normal hormonal reaction. However it's also normal for the baby's father to be around to take care of that horniness. Instead I get to use a vibrator that Cristina insisted I buy after I told her of the problem. It was mortifying by the way. Buying it.

In other words, get your ass home so I don't need a vibrator.

Especially since when BabyShep ends up being a girl I'll have you as my sex slave.

And McKnowitall...she even knows what sex the baby is. The other day during the ultrasound (new picture included) she smiled at one point and now just smiles anytime I bring up the baby. She knows. And I think she told Mark because he smiles too. And Bailey. And Joe. Everyone but me and you is going to know the sex of this baby. The hospital is a strange world.

My life is a strange world without you.

It's like everything is normal except for your not here. Which makes everything so not normal. It's like there's a hole everywhere I am. There's a place where you should be and it's just empty. It's not a feeling I'm a fan of.

This has probably been the most ramblnig email of them all.

So I am finishing it. Besides I have to pee...our little girl is currently sitting on my bladder. I love her.

And I love you.

So does she.

Miss you. Come home to us soon.

Yours Forever

Meredith

I sure hope the road don't come to own me.

Ooooh...I like that chapter. Meredith is kind of going crazy. I must say it is cute. Ever so cute. And besides that, I have nothing to say about this chapter.

Tomorrow I work and then I'm headed to my boyfriend's house but will probably write an update there. So you can expect something to be posted around this time tmomorrow night as well. It will be Derek's letter. And it will hopefully be just as wonderful. And the Christmas one...it will be updated soonish. Maybe tomorrow night...maybe Sunday. With Christmas just over a week away my life has gotten busy...but I am going to get that up before Christmas. Do not fear. And in really crazy news...Season 3 should be updated before Christmas as well. I started working on it tonight and it's going to be a great "episode".

Read. Love. Review.