Chapter 30
Spend all your time waiting for that second chance for a break that would make it okay there's always one reason to feel not good enough and it's hard at the end of the day I need some distraction oh beautiful release memory seeps from my veins let me be empty and weightless and maybe I'll find some peace tonight
"I love you" Brooke whispered as she lied in Lucas' arms
"I know you do"
"But I really do. I just get scared sometimes. I…I just don't want to hurt again Luke, so sometimes I want to shut you out"
"I understand"
"But in the end you're always here for me"
"And I will continue to be"
"And that's why I had to tell you 'I love you'" she kissed him, "but there's something else I need to take care of." she hopped off the bed and headed for the door "but I'll come back for you" she added "I promise" she winked at him and left the house
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Peyton lied in her bed, alone for the first time since Brooke had moved back in. She knew she was with Lucas so she felt a sense of relief and happiness; but couldn't help feeling alone all the same. She heard a knock at the door and slowly got out of bed to see who it was.
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Nathan woke up to find the rest of the bed empty. There was a note on the pillow next to him.
My dearest Nathan,
I couldn't wake up next to you, pretending like everything is okay again. Because its not. You hurt me deeply Nathan, and I know I hurt you, but we moved past that, so I have faith will move past this as well. I have faith is us Nathan, but I just need some more time. You are my heart and soul Nathan Scott, and I will wait for you. I will wait for us to be together again; because in the end, it's always going to be you and I. But things happen that make us question the decisions we made. Sometimes I wonder if marrying you was the best thing to do, but in my heart I know it was. Please don't be mad at me for last night. In a way I'm just like you, in the sense that I mess up too, and that's what last night was, a mistake. Yes I still love you, and always will, but last night shouldn't have happened. Not until our hearts are together again. Please keep faith that we'll work it out. I still do. Call me later.
Love you always and forever
Nathan set the note back down on the pillow. This girl who he first went out with to piss of Lucas, has now become one of the biggest, if not the biggest, part of his life. He loved her with everything he had inside. He had faith they would work it out. It had to. After all, they were Haley and Nathan Scott.
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Peyton just stared at the person in front of her. Was it a dream? She ran forward and wrapped herself in Jake's arms, praying to God that it wasn't a dream.
"I missed you so much" he said
"I missed you more" she argued back
"I beg to differ" he added, still holding her in his arms
"let's not argue" she said "let me just be in your arms"
"I'm not gonna leave again"
"How can you be sure. That's what you said the last time?"
"But this time's different" he said. She realized that something was up
"How?" she asked stepping back a little so she could see his face as he spoke
"Because Nikki had Jenny"
"What?"
"she won the case and now she gets to keep Jenny."
"Why aren't you fighting, doing something" she asked hastily
"I did Peyton, I fought for 5 days. The court made its decision though"
"Jake" she said and now held him in her arms
"I'm so sorry I ever left you in the first place" he said
"Don't be sorry. I'm just glad you're finally here. Even if the reason for it is sad"
"Let's not think about that right now. I know in my heart I'll see my daughter again. But for right now, I want to be with you. I want everything with you Peyton. I wont leave you again"
"Promise"
"I promise. And if the day comes when I could have the possibility of getting Jenny back, you will come with me, and we'll be the family we both want. No more leaving you behind or keeping secrets from you. I love you" he said.
"I love you too" she replied, jumping in his arms and kissing him. Love was beginning to find its way back in Tree Hill.
in the arms of an angel fly away from here from this dark cold hotel room and the endlessness that you fear you are pulled from the wreckage of your silent reverie you're in the arms of the angel may you find some comfort there
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"Hey" Nathan said as he walked up to Lucas at the river court.
"Hey" Lucas responded
"Look man I'm sorry."
"I'm sorry too" Lucas replied. They smiled at each other.
"I never wanted to do that man, ever. It just happened and I'm so sorry it did"
"Look Nate, it's cool. Me and Brooke are fine. I forgave her, I'll forgive you. But don't let it happen again little bro, or I'll make sure next time you wont be living to tell the after story if you get my drift" he smiled
"I get it, and trust me, it wont ever happen again"
"You need to work things out with Haley though, she's really hurting"
"I know. I'm trying, but her heart is really broken by what I did. She says she just needs time."
"That's not true"
"What do you mean?" Nathan asked with confusion. That's all Haley had been saying to him, that she needed time and space. How could it not be true
"Trust me, that's what I thought I needed too. I thought it would take me forever to forgive Brooke, and that the answer to my problem was space away from her. But the truth is, all it took was a few special words. All Haley wants to hear is how she's the only one for you."
"But I've told her that"
"Make it special Nate. Don't just say it, prove it" he slapped Nathan on the back. "She needs you man, more than ever. So go be with your wife"
so tired of the straight line and everywhere you turn there's vultures and thieves at your back and the storm keeps on twisting you keep on building the lie that you make up for all that you lack it don't make no difference escaping one last time it's easier to believe in this sweet madness oh this glorious sadness that brings me to my knees
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"Haley" Nathan said as she opened the door
"I thought I told you to call me"
"I was never good at listening to directions" he smiled
"Nathan I need some space right now"
"No you don't"
"How do you know"
"Because I know you Haley James Scott. You're too smart for your own good. You may not always show it, but you care about what happens in people's lives. You wrinkle your nose when the corners of toast burns in the toaster. You peek between your fingers when watching scary movies because you're too scared and don't want to admit it. You always leave the bathroom light on at night just incase either of us would need to use it, so we wouldn't trip over something and break our legs. You're so strong, but never want to show your weaknesses. You underestimate your musical talent. You, Haley James Scott, I know because I love you, and only you. I would rather die than see you in this much pain. I wish sometimes I was your friend instead of your husband so I could understand everything you're going through. But at the same time, if I wasn't your husband, I wouldn't know what its like to kiss you, and that would be tragic. You see Haley, you're my soul mate, and I know you don't particularly believe in fate and soul mates and stuff like that, but if one day you decide to believe, I would be yours. We are meant to be together. And yes, people make mistakes, but that's what makes us human. Haley, I'm so sorry I ever caused you to cry a single tear. I wish I could take it all back, but I cant. All I can do is ask you to forgive me, and hope that our love is stronger than either of us know." he paused, hoping that he had finally said the right words. The look on her face made him assume he had. She had begun to cry, but he believed they were the good tears. He took the risk and walked over to her and wiped the tears away. "See Haley, I want to be there to dry those eyes of yours, not cause them to shed more tears."
in the arms of an angel fly away from here from this dark cold hotel room and the endlessness that you fear you are pulled from the wreckage of your silent reverie you're in the arms of the angel may you find some comfort there
She just stared at him. He had definitely said all the right words this time. But did she believe him? Of course she did. She loved him so much. He had made a mistake, but he was her husband. They had to be able to work it out. She leaned up and kissed him, something she wanted to do ever since he walked in the door. Their moment was interrupted by another knock at the door.
"I guess there's hope for me yet" Brooke said in the doorway
Nathan and Haley pulled apart from each other and looked in her direction.
"I just wanted to come over and talk Haley"
"I don't want to talk to you" she shot back, now cuddling in her husband's arms
"Is it impossible for you to forgive me?"
"I don't know"
"But you forgave Nathan"
"Nathan's my husband"
"Yeah and I'm your friend"
"Really?"
"Yeah"
"How?" Haley was not getting upset. Yeah she had forgive Nathan, but that was different. For some reason, she couldn't forgive Brooke quite yet.
"Earlier this year, when both of us were single, we formed a relationship Haley. A friendship that I so desprately need. You've saved me in more ways than one and I need you to forgive me"
"I guess we don't have the same needs" Brooke stared at her. How could she be doing this to her. She was genuinely sorry, just like Nathan, yet he was forgive and she wasn't. And better yet, Haley was trying to act like they were never friends in the first place. "You see Brooke, in the whole scenario you just describe, it seems to me that you get more out of this relationship than I do, so in that case it makes me wonder if we were ever friends."
Brooke began to cry. She needed Haley, desprately. But she didn't know how much more of this she could take.
"It sucks doesn't it, when you think you can count on someone and they let you down" Haley shot back
"Fine, if this is how you want to be, then fine. If our friendship really meant nothing to you then I guess I'll have to move on. I cant explain to you how sorry I am, and you obviously don't really care to hear me anyways." she turned around to leave "but just promise me one thing, make up with Lucas, he doesn't deserve to be hated by you too"
"Oh really, and why's that"
"Because he didn't do anything to you" and she turned around and began walking down the sidewalk to cross the street. Just then Haley shouted something as she too was coming out of the house
"He's with you, and to me that's unacceptable. You did an awful thing, and you always seem to break his heart." Brooke continued to stare at her as she stood in the street "I was just trying to look out for him Brooke, so sue me. He didn't want to listen to me so that's how it ended"
"People make mistakes, you should know that" Brooke shot back "And treating me like shit isn't going to make the guilt you feel, any better" Brooke turned around to continue crossing the street when a car hit her. The man driving had been fumbling through his CD collection and didn't even notice the fragile body standing in the middle of the road. What happened next seemed to move in slow motion. Haley cried out to try and warn her when she first spotted the car. But it was too late. Brooke Davis flew through the air as the car tried to slam on its breaks to save her. She now lied in the middle of the road. Haley ran toward her. This couldn't be happening, not know, not after everything she just said. She tried to do something. But looking at her broken body lying on the macadam, she knew there wasn't much she could do.
"Nathan call 911" she shouted from the street. She looked down at the bleeding body beneath her. It was an ugly sight. "Oh God…oh God…no…please don't let this happen…no…" she cried. Haley would have given anything to have Brooke wake up and look her in the eyes. The possibility of never speaking to her again was flooding her mind, and she couldn't stop crying. All of a sudden the differences the two girls had was gone. Haley wished she could have taken back everything she said. She didn't mean it. She needed Brooke in her life as well. It just couldn't end this way. It just couldn't.
you're in the arms of the angel may you find some comfort here
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Enjoy! i know its a sad one but hang in there...the song is "Angel" by Sarah McLachlan