I just want to say something to these people who randomly sit down and make computer viruses… GET A GIRLFRIEND! Do they not realise that unleashing harmful trash onto people's computers loses valuable data, prevents them from updating and otherwise pisses them off BIG TIME? I mean do they not have lives? What makes someone sit there and think "oh, I'll screw with someone's day today." Assholes.
Ahem
That said, here's the update which if you want to blame me for being late, see above and remember that Chaotsi has leant me a flamethrower—what's the saying? "I have PMS and a flamethrower- excuse me did you say something?"
That reminds me, for all those who haven't joined the DAdiscussion group in Yahoo. We nominated June as Dark Angel month and everyone is making something to ass be it pics, fics, manips, vids, stick figures. If you wanna do something to join in- email me! It's a blast and one girl already has done Mole a la maid Marian- v.v funny.
BTW the reviews are as long as the story, but since no one is complaining, i wont say a word. 63 reviews for that chapter! 63! thank you soooooooooooo much.
Chapter 10 Wind of change
Alec McDowell wasn't one given to introspection. He had always been an act first, act again and think later kind of guy and, although it had kept him from being killed on multiple occasions, right now that kind of mentality wasn't helping.
It had been a week since he had walked out on Max.
A full week without seeing her smile or her laugh, her glittering eyes or her temper.
He had started out with feelings of righteous indignation which had spiralled into deepest despair within hours.
He had let her go.
He had had her and he had let her go.
Was he mentally retarded in some way? Did he get hit on the head in training? Was there some basic sequence in his DNA that yelled 'asshole'?
He had been after Max since she had kicked his ass across the room nearly eleven years ago, and after no more than a few months he had thrown her away.
Oh, there was a special place for him all right.
But there had been something holding him back from going to her and apologising and that had one word.
Pride.
So instead of going back to the flat and telling Max exactly what was wrong and having some spectacular make up sex, he had spent the last week punching the hell out of every fighter in the circuit. It felt much more satisfying than punching the walls.
His nights he had alternated between sleeping in the locker room and accepting beds from friends… the few he hadn't beaten to a pulp anyway.
He hadn't even dared to go back to the apartment just in case she wasn't there.
Where would she be otherwise, maybe she had met someone, maybe she had just left.
Terror swept through him at the thought of her just up and leaving Seattle without letting him know where she had gone and it was almost enough t have him running back.
Almost.
Of course, two days ago Alec had reminded himself that he was not some pansy-whipped little wimp, but the infamous Alec McDowell, X5-494, who could have had any woman in the whole of Manticore up to and including Renfro, if his digestive system would have allowed it.
Alec shuddered at that thought. There are some places that the human mind just shouldn't have to go.
So, Alec had gone out jogging, trying to muster up enthusiasm to actually do something. He had passed highway three and sector six stopping for lunch at an all-you-can-catch fishing dock and the carried on for no other reason than he wanted to. That night that he had spent under the stars reminded him of being back on missions, just hearing the swish of the wind in the trees and the gentle snores of his fellow soldiers. It had done more to calm him than any fight that he had been in months.
The next day he ran through the far-fields of sector 9 and made his way through sector 11 checkpoint security.
And now he stopped running, catching his breath, at the crest of a familiar hill.
With slow steps he mounted the grassy verge and peered over the horizon.
Before him lay a veritable tableau of history—his. The expanse of land that stretched out from the bottom of the hill for miles was more familiar to him than the back of his hand.
It was home.
Alec stared down at the charred ruins of his childhood home and it was as if time had frozen for him.
The once proud site of the most technically advanced scientific research in the world was now no more than a few blackened bricks and shattered glass.
The wet dew under his knees made Alec realise that he had crouched to view the wreckage, a throwback from when to stand on this hill meant manoeuvres and maintaining the illusion of camouflage.
Alec slowly rose to his feet and made his way down the hill towards Manticore. The grass was wet and slippery under his feet and once would have catapulted him into the electric fence. Now that fence had long since been deactivated and torn down. The few wire shards that remained of the advanced security system were pathetic reminders of the once impenetrable fortification.
A fitting symbol.
Alec walked into what had once been the courtyard and he fancied that eh could hear the echoes of long ago drills and yells.
Eyes Front
There was the spot where Max had kicked him in the unmentionables after their last fight here.
I need you Max. I need you too.
Wasn't that where Biggs had fought with Pix over Chance?
You are never going to touch her again! No-good, arrogant Romeo!
He remembered fighting with Aiden right here, on this very spot, if he looked hard enough, he could still see the blood stain.
Alec looked around the Training Yard. There was more blood than he remembered. Of course all of the bodies would have long been taken away but the stains had withstood rain, snow and sun to seep into the tarmac forever proclaiming it a graveyard.
Or a massacre.
Alec shuddered and walked over to the burned out husk of the main building. The walls still creaked with the effort of holding the place up and debris littered the floors.
But to his expert eye and ingrained sense of direction—added to the fact that he had walked these hallowed halls so often that he knew them without looking—he found the room he was looking for.
There. That was where he had first seen her.
"You know if you squint hard enough you can see the space needle?"
That was where he had met Max for the first time, where she had kicked him.
"And here I thought you'd missed gentlemanly behaviour 101 when you barged in here without knocking."
Although the walls were crumbling and the glass had exploded out from the fittings, he traced the edge of the window that she had been looking out of the very first time he had seen her.
He had been right. If you squinted hard enough you could see the Space Needle.
Alec smirked and pushed himself away from the window, moving back to pace the walls that he had once called home.
Each and every step, every single stone, every room, each hallway; was a memory.
That was where he had first met Chance; a scrawny looking kid that had been pushed into their dorm and given to Biggs.
That was Carrot's first kiss.
That was where Cece had thrown up after her first field med course.
That was where Max had mimicked a Trainer and had them all in hysterics.
This was the spot where Dek had tried to abduct Max with Flex's help.
That was Pix's last prank.
That was where Steve had learned to juggle.
That was where Metz had caught Emma changing; the poor guy blushed for a week.
That was where Feen first kissed Techie.
That was where Max had forgiven him.
Alec brushed a lock of hair away from his face and was shocked to find his face wet.
He was crying.
Absently brushing aside those fat tears Alec ducked a trailing wire and found the stairs he hadn't even realised that he had been heading for.
The stairs led to a chamber; the chamber led to a hallway; the hallway led to a staircase; the staircase led down.
The air grew fetid and stale, whether in reality or just in his imagination, and it made him shudder with unrestrained fear.
It was odd how the things that scare us as children can be blown out of all proportion when we are grown and Alec knew that better than any. The anomalies that had terrified him as a child had turned out to be nothing more than his hairy predecessors. Fuzzy, fluffy and hungry, but mostly harmless.
But there are also some terrors that only got worse with the telling.
Alec took a deep breath and pushed open the door.
It was just as he had remembered; had he ever cared to remember it.
The room had been unfairly untouched by the fire as if the elements themselves were loathed to touch the place.
The long steel table was no longer as shiny as it had been, the months of disuse and neglect lending a tarnished sheen to the surface. Or maybe it was dried blood that gave it the rust colour, he couldn't be sure.
The instruments were scattered all over the floor in disarray and he nudged them with his feet knowing what each and every piece did and exactly how much it hurt.
He could even predict exactly how loud he would scream with each piece.
Duty, discipline, mission.
Alec's fists clenched as he trailed his hands over the table and looked up into the screen.
A blank screen.
When in enemy territory any sign of sympathy is weakness. Compassion is a tool they use against you. Sensitivity is NOT permitted. You have no emotions. Strength is your tool.
Alec shuddered.
Duty.
Psy-ops. The place where they took who you were and moulded it into the person that they wanted you to be.
Discipline.
He had been 494 and Max had made him Alec. He was Alec.
But what Max didn't know was that this place had always held a part of him. The part that said; "Wait, stop, don't get too close." The part that cautioned; "What if one day we have to kill her? What if one day we have to walk away? How will you live like that?"
He had been drilled from birth that to get close was to be vulnerable and he had fought against that vulnerability with all his might for all his life.
Until a fiery ball of '09er fell into his lap and he had fallen.
And she had turned into another master, he was a willing slave but she was still in charge.
They had fallen in love, true. But even in that, it had always been on her terms, no matter what Max thought. She had called and he came running. She threw a temper tantrum and he begged forgiveness. He had been the one to go to her.
In letting her have all of the power he had been trying to run away from what he really was, what he was capable of.
After Rachel died it had been so easy to let someone else do his thinking, his feeling and he had needed her to do that for him.
But in doing that he had only see Max for what she could do for him, he had never seen her for who she really was.
That much was evident from the dream that he had had of her being the perfect housewife
That wasn't who Max was, that had never been who she was and he knew that.
He had hadn't seen it. What was that human phrase, he hadn't seen the wood through the trees?
Had he ever seen Max through the master? The master that he had always seemed to need in his life to tell him what to do.
When Manticore had burned he had been so glad to get rid of that reminder of himself that he had almost tried to get himself to believe that it had never existed.
He had been so insistent that Psy-Ops was nothing but a bad dream. Hell, that Manticore was nothing but a lie.
But it wasn't. It had been real and he needed to face that.
He did not need a master. He didn't need someone to tell him what to do.
What he needed was someone to understand him and love him nonetheless. What he needed was someone who he could be on an equal footing with.
What he needed was Max; but this time on his own terms.
He needed to start seeing her for the person that she was and not the person that he wanted her to be.
He could face his demons, even if they were inside himself.
Alec grinned at the stainless steel table as it reflected his face in a bizarre twisted effect making him look sinister.
"You have no power over me."
And he turned. Never to look back.
>>>>>
Aiden rubbed his hands as he watched Max and Dek sitting on the back porch together. He was well aware of what had been going on between them this past week.
After the night that they had kissed, Max had come into the house a mess, alternating between being anxious and hurt and Aiden had been the one to calm her down.
He had been sitting on the couch when she had stormed in.
"Max," he had said absently, not looking up from his paper. Her silence had made him glance up to see her wringing her hands in unease.
"Max?"
She looked at him, her eyes wide and almost fearful and it hadn't taken him long to put two and two together.
Aiden placed the paper down. "What did he do?"
"I kissed him… he kissed me…I don't…" she trailed off quickly and bit her lip.
Aiden opened his arms and Max sank onto the sofa next to him and leaned her head against his arm.
"What am I doing?"
"Making a right royal Manticore mess of things?" he quipped and gained a watery laugh in return.
"As always."
"True or false, Max. You love Alec."
"True," she replied without hesitation.
"True or false, you love Dek?"
Max opened and shut her mouth several times. "As a friend? Yeah, I do and he loves Drew."
"Dek's problem," Aiden said carefully, "is that he doesn't know whether Drew is alive or not and you are close enough to her to almost not matter."
"I feel like I should feel bad for being a substitute," she said blankly.
"Aren't you doing the same to Dek" Aiden asked. "I always envied the way that you and Alec looked at each other; like you were the only ones who ever mattered. Pix looked at Chance like that, Flex at Skye, Sunny at Biggs, Dek and Drew and Carrot and Tara."
"Feen and Techie?" Max sniffed.
"Hell no, Techie was too bewildered to be pleased!"
Max smiled.
Aiden continued carefully. "I was jealous of you guys because you seemed to have something that I never have. Yet you always took it for granted—all of you, not just you and Alec. You never realised exactly how precious that was. What you all had was…is precious Max. Don't give up on that if you can just because you've had some difference of opinion. Have a break, have a think, but don't think about breaking until it's too far gone to repair."
Max had sat with him in silence for an hour before smiling gently and reaching up to kiss him on the cheek.
"We don't give you nearly enough credit," she'd said softly and Aiden had grinned.
"A genius is never appreciated in his own time."
Now as he watched them on the back porch he could see that Max had taken his words to heart.
Although she sat in the circle of Dek's arms she had refused to let their relationship go further than a few kisses.
Aiden grinned as he heard Dek's laugh.
He had wondered if his friends preoccupation was really to do with losing Drew or simply hating that Alec had the one he loved by his side only to push her away. He knew that if Drew were around Dek would never take her for granted or let her go.
Or perhaps he had the wrong end of the stick and it was just the Shark thing that kept them together like that.
Or maybe it was just him and he was just jealous, after all he had never had anyone like that. He had never found anyone that he had that kind of connection with and he felt it keenly.
What he wouldn't give to have someone look at him the way Max did at Alec. The room warmed up when they were in it together.
Aiden leaned against the window and stared out, lost in thought.
He was an okay looking guy, wasn't he? So why had no woman ever looked at him like that before? He didn't begrudge any of his friends the happiness that they had with their mates but…
"Aide?" Max had come in without him noticing, followed closely by Dek.
"Yeah," he quickly wiped his face, not willing to let see that he had been upset.
"You okay?" Max asked, her brows furrowed in worry over her friend.
"I'm okay," Aiden shrugged. "What's up?"
"We were gonna go out, maybe get take-out so you don't hafta cook, and we're celebrating Max not having to be in work for another twelve hours," Dek answered looking as troubled as Max did.
"Like it'd kill you to pick up a skillet," Aiden joked.
"Since I have no idea what one of those is, it probably would." Dek smirked.
"It would kill all of us; did you not smell Dek's Beef stew in Life Skills?" Max shuddered. "Even the rats abandoned ship after that."
"The meat was off!" Dek protested to their laughs.
"So was Cece's aim," Aiden chuckled as he recalled what had happened after the infamous stew had gone wrong.
"Hey, you guys wanna meet me for lunch tomorrow?" Max asked.
"I'll have to check my schedule," Aiden grinned. "I'm sure I can fit you in."
"Will your boss mind?" Dek mocked.
"You scared him!" Max laughed. "His all important client who would sue him and take away his business? As long as I say I'm keeping you sweet, Normal will take whatever we give him."
Dek snatched her close and planted a kiss on her upturned mouth. "Am I keeping you sweet?"
Aiden rolled his eyes in exaggeration and Max pushed Dek away with an exasperated sigh. "I'll grab my jacket."
She edged past her friends and towards the room she had been staying in whilst she was there.
Dek waited until she closed the door before turning to his best friend. "Aide?"
"Leave it," Aiden requested knowing that his friend wanted to know what was making him so unhappy before.
Dek eyed him. "Sure, pal. Just so's you now, I'm here okay?"
"I know." Aiden warred with himself before just coming out and saying it. "I hope you know what you're doing."
"What?" Dek gave a half-laugh.
"You and Max. Don't forget what you still might have. If Drew showed up here tomorrow you know you'd drop Max like a tonne of bricks. Which is how it should be. But if Alec shows up here, remember that Max feels the same."
"What are you saying?" Dek asked seriously knowing that his friend had a point.
"Kisses…whatever, is fine whilst you are in limbo, but you don't want to lose her friendship when things go south. When…not if. Max is too good a friend to lose that way. Just remember that."
Dek stared at him for a moment and Aiden wondered if he had stepped over the boundary and Dek would resent him for interfering.
The silence stretched as they stood there, in the kitchen, just staring at each other.
Dek swallowed. "Thank you."
Thank you for knowing and telling it to him straight. Thank you for always being there no matter what stupid things he was doing or going through. Thank you for never letting him down no matter what. Thank you for not letting him fall into the abyss when he couldn't find Drew. Thank you for caring.
Thank you.
Aiden nodded. "No problem."
Max walked out holding her leather jacket and motorbike keys in one hand.
"We ready to go?"
"Sure. Let's celebrate."
>>>>>
Although Alec had maintained that one warehouse looked pretty much like another, the warehouse that housed the messenger service known as Jam Pony was far busier than any he had seen before.
The ramp leading to the doorway was constantly filled with bikes going either in or out and gangs of loud youths talking and yelling at each other.
He edged in past two women arguing about their boyfriends, pausing long enough to give him the once over and smile beguilingly before continuing.
He heard the hard backbeat of someone's boom box screaming out for the girl to "walk this way".
His eyes took a second to adjust to the light as he walked into the centre and he paused to get his bearings.
To his right was a long desk where a tall man was scribbling something onto a clipboard and occasionally yelling obscenities at various youths who tried to scuffle by.
Hanging up all around him were bikes of various states of disrepair and the whole place had a feel of ordered chaos about it.
Two guys were playing at sword fighting with packages whilst a black woman watched idly filing her nails.
"Yo smackdown!" yelled one of the men triumphantly as he managed to knock his opponent over with his package.
"Yo bums!" the man at the desk yelled. "If those packages go awry then It'll come outta your wages!"
"Awree?" the blonder of the two inquired.
"Awry as in skewed, askew, off-kilter. As in you mess it up you buy it you feckless bum. Don't you have something to do?" The phone rang and the man answered it with a roll of his eyes.
"I'm on a break," he protested and Alec felt himself grin as he walked over.
"Ah, excuse me, sir?"
"Just a minute," the man said not looking up as he held a hand over the receiver, "be right with ya."
"Can you just tell me where I can find—" Alec started but was interrupted by another man with dark hair as he elbowed past carrying a huge bouquet of flowers.
"Delivery for a 'Max Guevara'."
Alec's jaw dropped as he stared at the Snapdragons overflowing on the desk. Flowers for Max? His Max?
"Ooh, boy!" the black woman sashayed over. "Look at them!"
"Jeez, that's a big bunch of flowers." The blond man went to touch one of the petals but was slapped by the woman.
"Hands off, fool. My girl don't need no dirty dumbass messing up her posies, dig?"
"Fine, your original-ness," the man stepped back. "I won't touch."
"I think so too, these fellas cost a pretty penny." She sniffed delicately at them, the action at odds with her leather jacket and bright green pants.
"I don't care if they cost a pretty penny or a dirty dollar, get them off my desk," the man behind the desk snapped. "Where is missy miss anyway?"
"Max," the woman emphasised, "Is out with her man, again."
Alec's heart dropped into his stomach. Max was out with a guy?
"He's not her guy," the blond man said earning him all sorts of brownie points with Alec.
"Please," the woman gave his a look that said patently that he was an idiot. "Yesterday it was motor oil, today its flowers? If he ain't her boy then he soon will be."
Alec gritted his teeth. Not if he could help it.
"And it's about time too," she continued. "I hate ta see a girl moaning about some dumbass who don't deserve her. If she ain't gonna strike for my team than at least she can play a few rounds that end in a home run."
The blond leaned on the desk. "Did I ever tell you how much it turns me on that you know all sorts of sporting phrases?"
She raised one eyebrow and he quickly stumbled back, his hands up. "Not if I was straight and you were the last stoner on the planet, Sketch."
"You wound me, O.C, really."
"I wish."
They had the perfect banter of two people who had been friends long enough to know what barbs hurt and what didn't and Alec realised that in an odd way they reminded him of Flex and Skye.
As he turned back to the counter the man had finished his conversation and looked up.
"What can I do for you?"
Alec opened his mouth. He wanted to find Max that was all. He had come here to ask if Max wanted to go to lunch with him. That way they could talk and get things out on the open. He could explain what had caused his preoccupation and his latest tantrum and he could try to make things right. Get to know her all over again.
But that wasn't what came out.
"I'd like a job." He blinked and quickly added, "Sir."
The man opened his mouth to deny his request when the blond man spotted him.
"Hey, I know you, you're that boxer dude."
Alec winced. "Uh, yeah."
The man behind the desk widened his eyes in recognition. "Monty Cora?"
"Who?" the black woman looked less than impressed.
"Monty Cora," Alec explained scratching the back of his head in embarrassment, "It's a stage name."
"I once saw this beautiful man take down "Mangler" Miller in less than forty-five seconds flat. Wonderful! Bravo!"
"You tripping, Normal." The woman said rolling her eyes.
"No, it was magnificent."
"Uh, thanks…Normal?" Alec wondered if that was the guys real name at all.
"Please, call me Reagan. So you're looking for a job, huh?"
Alec nodded quickly. "Yeah. Yeah, I'd love to be a part of Team Jam Pony."
He would.
Kinda.
"Great," Normal said. "I could use a good, strong rooster in the henhouse."
"You sure you want another testosterone laden male around with all the suga here?"
Normal grinned. "Monty Cora this is Original Cindy, she'll show you the ropes."
Alec remembered the name from Max's tales. "Original Cindy," he paused. "Don't I know you from somewhere?"
"Gee," she rolled her eyes with added attitude. "I ain't never heard that one before."
"No, seriously. I know you." Alec tried hard to think. He had definitely seen her somewhere before. He shrugged, it'd come to him.
"You know where I could score a bike around here?" he asked her with his best charming smile.
Normal jumped in before she could answer, grabbing bike from a selection off the ceiling and handing it to him like the crown jewels. "Here you go. Here you go, easy-peasey-Japanesey."
"Thank you," Alec said politely even though the guy was creeping him out. "Oh, uh, don't I need one of those, uh, sector-pass things?"
"Yes. I'll put in a request; you'll have it by morning." Normal simpered at him and Alec felt like he needed a wash. "O.C. show our new rock star the ropes."
Alec grinned widely at her. "So, O.C. you gonna show me around?"
"Now don't you be fluttering them baby blues at me, boo. I don't swing that way. You better play up, fella coz I ain't about to get canned for some pretty boy. You act like a useless male around me and I will smack your ass down."
Alec frowned, that sounded familiar.
"Oh no you don't go flutterin' baby blues at me, I don't swing that way. Now ya nearly made me crash and that woulda made me late and get me canned for you being a fool. Now I almost broke a nail stopping for you so quit acting like a useless male, get offa the sidewalk and I won't haveta come offa my ride and smack your raggedy ass down, you dig?"
Alec's grin suddenly became genuine. "I knew I knew you. Last year, you almost mowed me down in the high street by the church and helped me find my girlfriend."
Original Cindy cocked her head for a second before motioning him to follow her. "I dimly recall. Did you find her?"
Alec smiled sheepishly. "I'll let ya know."
She eyed him dubiously. "All right then pretty boy, lets see ya do this."
That morning Alec found out that there is far more to being a bike messenger than he had ever expected and he winced as he recalled all the times he had ignored Max's complaints.
People were rude, packages were heavy, uphill was murder, tips were poor, weather was bad and sector cops were plain mean. Alec had butt ache from sitting on a bike all morning and he was sick of smiling for his tips.
He lay on the floor of the recreation ground and moaned loudly.
Sketchy grinned. "See, I keep telling people that prostitution isn't such a bad deal compared to this."
Alec laughed. He and Original Cindy had met up with Sketchy around sector 3, the second time Alec had fallen off his bike, unused to the balancing that had to be done. Alec decided that he liked the odd blond with his random asides and faint odour of herbs.
"Yeah," he laughed shortly. "And here I thought getting my ass whupped in the ring was bad."
"Like you ever got whupped!" Sketchy defended and Alec grinned at the loyal blond.
"Thanks, Sketchy, it's nice to know that I have your support."
"Huh," Original Cindy said with a roll of her eyes. "Damn fool men, you know I gotta ask. What is the appeal of gettin' in a ring and cracking the cranium of some steroid pumping pimp on crack?"
Alec and Sketchy stared at her blankly for a moment and then shrugged. "It must be a guy thing," Sketchy grinned. "Like kung fu movies and—"
"Standing up to pee?" O.C. cut in.
Alec gasped on a laugh as he lay back down, hidden from the glare of the sun as he settled against one of the many barrels that littered the recreation ground. He stared at the sky feeling content with himself for the first time in days. He watched birds as they swooped and dropped and relaxed listening to O.C. and Sketchy arguing above him.
"You a sucka for any fool that comes along peddlin' any hooha, Sketchy! Show some class. Weed ain't blue!"
"But he said it was specially grown, O.C. and Mad Hamish is one of the big dogs."
"I don't care if he a big fat cat delio, he shows up pushing this crap on you again, and me and him are having words. Period."
"Look at you, all mama O.C."
Alec froze as he recognized the carefree teasing voice of his beloved.
"Hey Max, please tell this woman that I am perfectly within my rights to smoke blue weed," Sketchy whined.
"Dumbass," Max laughed and reached up to ruffle his hair. "Now doesn't blue weed reduce sperm count or cause impotence?" she pretended to muse whilst Sketchy grew pale.
"Impotence?" he reached into his pocket, sagging as he tossed the clear packet of suspicious merchandise to O.C. who giggled.
"You go girl!" she enthused and Max grinned.
"Well, we don't know what that would do to him and we have to take care of our Sketchy, don't we?" she pinched Sketchy's cheek and he rolled his eyes, patently pleased with her attentions.
Alec sat up. "Maybe it's you who is the mama, Max; I mean you do try to take care of everyone."
Max froze as she looked down at Alec, her whole body tense.
"Alec?"
O.C. looked between her friend and the new guy. She didn't like the way that the smile, that had been a new fixture on her friends face these past few days, had suddenly disappeared. "You two know each other?"
"Yeah," Alec said, letting his eyes run all over as if it been longer than a week since he had last seen her.
"Hey, Max, you didn't tell us that you knew Monty Cora," Sketchy said, not quite picking up the vibes.
Max wrapped her arms around herself. "Monty Cora," she said flatly not lifting her gaze from Alec's shirt.
"Sketchy was a big fight fan."
"Oh."
And that was it. he half expected her to yell at him and demand what he was doing there but she seemed really uncomfortable. With a sinking heart Alec wondered if she really was seeing someone new and what he would do if she were.
"Boo, you okay?" O.C. asked eying her and Alec dubiously.
Max nodded and glanced up at Alec. Alec swallowed. "Can we talk, Maxie?"
Max shrugged and stepped away from her friends, Alec following quietly until they were across the park, away from curious eyes.
Max couldn't believe it. He was here, Alec was here. She was depressed, she was elated, she was loathe to read too much into it. She had had such bad dreams that something had happened to him and then there he was, standing in front of her. With her friends.
Why was he with her friends?
"What are you doing here, Alec?" she asked looking everywhere else but at him.
"Actually," he said humourlessly, "I'm on a break, my new job is kinda demanding."
"New job?" Max's voice was very careful.
"Oh, didn't I say?" Alec said innocently. "I joined this bike messenger service called Jam Pony."
Max's jaw dropped. "You did what?"
Alec shoved his hands into his pockets and shuffled his feet. "After we fought I got to thinking about stuff and I—" he took a deep breath "—I know that we have both made a lot of mistakes, mostly my fault here, I know that. But you were always the one thing in my life that I have been able to count on." He looked up with honesty written all over his face. "Max, no matter what else, I love you. No, I. Love. You. Really, as in…I can't…" he raked a frustrated hand through his hair and then he grabbed her hands, shaking her a bit with the force of his emotions.
"What happened?" Max asked softly, wondering what was wrong with Alec.
"You asked me why I needed you to stay safe." Alec began desperately urging her to just listen. "You wanted to know why there was one set of rules for you and another for me."
"Yeah."
"I've never been good with words, Max, you know that. I'm not Shakespeare. But I do understand basic chemistry—elements that, when you put them together always react. Oxygen and hydrogen make water, its elemental, a… a force of nature. But without it… without oxygen, ya know, hydrogen is just a gas." At her frown he tried to explain. "What you do to me, Max, feels like force of nature. You make me more than I am, you make me react. Without you, I'm just hydrogen. Shit," he swore at his ham-fisted attempt. "Not exactly Shakespeare."
"No," Max whispered. "Shakespeare never made me feel this way."
Alec drew in breath, feeling hope at her expression. "My point, Maxie, is that if anything ever happened to you, I couldn't go on living. There would be no point. You said yourself that you don't need me—well I need you."
Max ducked her head feeling ashamed of herself for those spiteful words, spoken in fury rather in truth. She had berated herself over and over for what she had said that night, even though she may have felt that way at the time. She did need him. She didn't want to but she did and that was what had grated so much. She had brought herself up to believe that she didn't need anyone; that she could and would do it all alone. It had been as much a comfort as it had a defence mechanism and she had clung to it fiercely.
But now as she stood here before an Alec was seemed oddly altered since their last meeting she wondered if it was worth it. Was it worth hiding her feelings if it left her with nothing? Nothing risked, nothing gained.
Max swallowed and stared at Alec who seemed to be fighting for words again.
"Manticore raised us to do as we were told, in time it was natural to want to be ordered- it kept us from thinking for ourselves. We never saw the Trainers as people, we saw them as automatons handing out orders and we followed blindly. It was easier to justify killing someone when we knew that we had no choice. Max…" he paused and then forged ahead, "You were always so forceful that it was always my gut feeling to follow you, to do as you bid because it was easier than thinking for myself."
Max stiffened, was he saying that she was like the Trainers?
"I loved you because you still gave me the choice, even if I didn't realise it at the time. You gave me what I needed and still helped me to be myself, but I guess I never really saw that. I saw you as who I wanted you to be, not who you were and that, that was our problem, Max. I never saw you. It took almost losing you to make me open my eyes to you."
"And now?" Max's voice was thick with unshed tears.
"Now I'm asking… begging—" he bit out "—if needs be, for you to give me the chance to see you. Please, Max," he choked, "let me see you."
Opening her arms Max let Alec fall into them, embracing him as hard as she could.
That was it. That was why she had never totally let her guard down around Alec, no matter how hard she tried. She had been aware, on some level, that although he knew Max—he didn't know her. Now he was asking for that knowledge, he was asking to be let back into her life and to finally actually live there rather than just exist.
She couldn't refuse him.
"Alec," she said dashing away tears as she pushed him away.
Fearing that she would reject him Alec surged forward. "I quit my job," he blurted. "No more ring fighting for me, ever."
Max let her lips twitch as she tried to regain herself. "Good, because you get eyed way too much for my peace of mind, pretty boy. If you are gonna be my man then I don't wanna have to drop kick some bitch for staring at ya."
"So," Alec looked at her with hope, "I get to stay?"
"Yeah," she frowned at his obvious glee. "But don't let it go to your head, Alec, you are on probation."
Feeling much more like himself, Alec grinned lasciviously. "Yes, ma'am."
Max rolled her eyes. "C'mon, Romeo, I wanna speak to Sketchy about something."
"Yeah, I see you doing that Mommy act." He teased. "Maybe we should head out and search for some of our own family…you never know what the kids have been getting up to in our absence."
Max spun on her heel. "You mean that?"
"Yes."
Max couldn't help it; she beamed beatifically at Alec before reaching over and punching his shoulder. "About damn time too, soldier!"
"Ouch!" he rubbed his arm and followed her back over to their fellow bikers. "You hurt, Max."
"Baby," she rolled her eyes.
"Harpy," he responded, fighting the grin that this oh-so-familiar exchange caused.
"Dumbass."
"Always about my ass," he shook his head. "You know this obsession you have with it isn't healthy?"
"Like I always said, Alec. You have to have one redeeming feature."
"Pretty boy has a redeeming feature, boo?" O.C. commented as she overheard their conversation.
"His ass."
O.C. casually walked around him staring at the aforementioned butt. Alec felt odd to have her stare at it.
"It's cute, but it ain't all that." O.C. passed judgement.
"Hey, that's prime material!" Alec defended trying to see his own backside and looking, scarily, like a dog trying to chase its tail. "Help me out here, Sketch."
Sketchy paused. "Uh, dude. I like wrestling and all, but I'm not checking out your ass, what am I? Normal?"
"Yeah, that was freaky-deaky," O.C. said. "Normal was totally jamming on your boy here."
"How do you know each other anyway?" Sketchy asked suddenly. "Do you fight in the ring, Max?"
"Nah," Max dipped into her bag for something to eat, coming out with a squashed cookie. "Never wanted to advertise my wares."
"Me and my Maxie go way back, right, honey?"
Max winced at the pet name, knowing full well that was why Alec had called her it.
"You're her boyfriend?" Sketchy blinked. "But I thought you were dating that other g—OW!"
O.C. pretended her elbow hadn't made swift contact with Sketchy's chest and smiled brightly. "Who wants pizza?"
Alec slowly turned to Max, not missing the guilty look that spread over her face. "Other guy, Maxie?" He tried to sound innocent.
Max sighed. "There's someone that you'll probably wanna meet."
Lynn-50670- Thank you for reviewing, pet. I love Dek and Max together too, but I adore Max/Alec more, so don't worry about me leaving them together for too long.
Erak- It does seem like my own fandom sometimes, I must admit that I often hope to see BJ/Anna stories pop up! lol I hope I've not put you off writing a Max in Manticore fic, we so don't have enough of them!
Ronda TIW- Of course not, like I'd do that to my little Alec! Plus I respect my cult members too much to do that! mwah!
Senorita DHL- I hope he was redeemed in this chapter. I do love Alec, really. To collect on the kiss you need to send a SAE and £400 to…. LOL.
Suenooneus- Thank you for reviewing, sweets, sometimes the making up is far more fun that the breaking up—it'll all be worth it!
Kim- you are a hard one to please, angel! but I had to try. Alec had his reasons for being an ass and all will be right in the world…HAH! Much banter now that they are together again.
Hphotshot- gracias pet, glad you like. As for Terminal City—jeez hold your horses, or ya know a chapter . I can't believe you skived off school! Oh I am so in trouble! Btw what HP ship do you subscribe to? (I assume that's what the hp in hphotshot is)
Jynx- Ahh pet, so sorry that you've been broken up with. If you send me your email address I'll send you a nice picky of Dek with very few clothes on—least I can do.
Caboodle- Bad author? Bad girl—yes, Bad author—no! I am fragile in my self esteem lol I live to be cruel but more soon.
Aur- Hope this satisfied you, pet. Alec was given more to do this chapter, so we can see him in his full glory—enjoy!
Raven- well I may have let Dek and Aiden on Dark Roof, but next chapter I lock Dek and Alec in a room together after Alec finds out about him and Max. How's that for evil?
Sigma1- LOL- Fayth destroyer? Sounds ominous. The warning was there for a reason—so I am glad that it met with your approval—one of my staunch critiques. I hope you feel that hey have been dealt with sufficiently.
Chaosti- Yeah I know, I'm bad. I don't hate you for being AWOL if you forgive me for taking so damn long to update! But yay for the flamethrower! Booyay! Its hard when you love a character but want him out of the way whilst you play, I hope I haven't done Alec too much damage. I can't sell Dek just yet, he hasn't finished cleaning the cooker. It's a great compliment that you can read a certain scene over and over- thanks pet. As for attention getting-0- I want photos of THAT!
Fangedangel- I know, I know, I've left it a long time with no update. I have no excuses…except the one about the dog eating the homework but I wouldn't believe that one, since I have no dog.
BlackRose9- if you killed Alec who'd be for Max when Dek got Drew back?
Lotamoxie- yup, sure did.
Moonangel18- LOL, really? Thanks sweetheart. I didn't do it to torture you.. at least not specifically evil grin
NoAngel- glad I could make you happy, pet. I'm glad that you realised that it had to be done, it's not all fun and games when two people are together. Sketchy is adorable, I just wish I had more time to write him in!
Geminagngel- Thank you for reviewing, angel, glad someone reads the AN.
Kristibella- thanks for forgiveness, sweets, I will make things better and no magic wand needed. The heat thing…wait and see.
Feenian- thanks you! I need protection from the lynch mob- they can be so scary! It'll be better when they are all together again, I miss them!
Tiggi- LOL- at least someone is happy with the Dek/Max kiss. I wouldn't let it go to far, Max may not be a paragon of virtue—but I am and I find it hard to see her with anyone else! Thank you for reviewing!
Iridescent Twilight- hey there, not seen you before, thank you for reviewing. The lack of update wasn't my fault but I vow that the next chapter will be out soon.
SGOU- OML! How do I reply to that without writing an essay? I so read that wrong, I thought you wanted Aiden and Alec to get together as in get together! That is one I'd have to deny…I'd drool but deny… maybe. Alec's behaviour was somewhat unreasonable but I hope that with this chapter you can at least see where he was coming from. If he isn't redeemed here, then at least he is on the road to rightness. Nude Dek! Hehehe. Oh no! I made you cry! So sorry…but not. The banter is back now that they are together and, oddly enough, it makes chapters almost surge forwards (wink), I have three in waiting to be betaed. I'm glad that you picked up on the shark DNA as one of the reasons that M and D feel so good around each other- its true. Another biggly wiggly one for you soon, too.
QuieraStarwberry9- I don't think that you are the only one that feels for Alec, at least I know I do, I hate being nasty to him, because I know why he does what he does. I think it is a man thing, which, not being a man, I don't get totally, but I am trying. I hope this went some way to helping that image of him.
Anon- First up I do thank you for reviewing and I totally appreciate constructive criticism. I am very much a Max fan because I always felt that most fanfic writers maligned her character and let her be too much S2 instead of S1.I am a M/A fan too. I realise that it may not seem it at the moment and hope I haven't neglected Alec to prop an original character as I hate that myself. The thing is that Alec in the Left Behind series isn't the Alec in the show. For the simple reason that his background and History has been different to the show's Alec. Instead of being on his own he has had a firm family support network- thanks in large part to Max and, in keeping him to canon in essential, he takes her for granted. I always saw Alec as being very laid back but quintessentially selfish. In that I don't think I have moved too far from canon but his experiences have moulded him to a certain degree and so he isn't show Alec—he is LB Alec. So in that you are right. I hope it doesn't spoil your enjoyment of the fic.
Bluejean452- Nah, its fine, I knew that it wasn't going to be a popular choice. I won't keep them together long. Thank you for reviewing anyway, sweets.
Acb- cheers pet.
Messymissy- Thanks for reviewing, I'm glad that you thought it was a good chapter. I think the reason that they are so good together is that they are so like each others partner Drew is very much like Max and Dek is like Alec. LOL, I don't want to turn you into a D/M shipper- Alec has his reasons, which I hope that became clear here. I'd love someone to make a fanfic of my fanfic! How cool would it be to see a Zan/ Drew fic or something like that!
Nevanroy- Thank you for reviewing, I am glad that you review; even only a few words, I appreciate that you took the time to do so.
Kiwifruit03- I feel like Laurel and Hardy- that's another fine mess they've gotten into!
Ash- gee thanks! Don't hate me, have Fayth that I will fix it!
Nicky- I know, I tend to enjoy the shock factor and twist tings to my own ends! Its like being Frankenstein- the characters are alive! It is just for comfort…and to give Alec a boot up the ass. You know Dek was the only one that Alec was afraid of the competition. He'll be a good boy from here out, scouts honour.
Gmaegirl452- Sorry pet, it has been a while but hey, what can ya do? LOL, okay I get that you think its wrong, ill make amends, honest.
Fan- cheers pet, and yes a happy ending will be forthcoming.
Jade-k- hey pet, wow I made you speechless- that's pretty darn cool!
Shyleigh3- I confuse and abuse but you know ill make it all right in the end.
Jessa- hey there! Thank you for reviewing, and I hope that it continues to please!
Moonlight star- tense but needed, good way of putting it! and yeah, it couldn't al be plain sailing- because that is boring!
Guest type person- you didn't see it coming? Oh well, I guess that was the point, grin I'm sure I can persuade Alec to drop by with a smootchie for ya! I'd like to have something against Dek! Heheheheh
Lanlie- hey sweets, glad you think it's the best yet! I hope that I don't change Alec to prop up my original characters, I hate loathe and despise it when writers Mary sue their fics with intent to wound. Also my Alec cant be like the shows Alec because he has had different upbringing- I never saw Alec as prime CO material he was far far too selfish for that, but My Alec has been changed by Max he isn't canon Alec! Sorry about updating once a month, the muse hasn't struck. Now she's back I hope to get doe more often.
Honey00- I have plan, a good plan, involving Jam , sweet corn, and a small army… oh wait, that's my plans to take over the world- ignore that.
CharmingAngel;- hey there, sweets. Thanks for reviewing. I stopped there because it was fun. The next part will be even better, trust ,me. Things are moving faster now. The link broke! I will fixit.
Keekee- Thank you for reviewing, pet, glad it was worth the wait. This part will be too!
Sassycanuck- there was more Alec in this chapter—lots more Alec! Enjoy it, and yeah they meet up with more soon.
XxInsanityxX- cheers pet, yeah it was Dek…and Zan who liked Max. But don't worry she wont be without Alec long.
Ganko- gracias, intriguing perhaps, maybe enticing. Definitely complicated and more than little crazy. All good words. Yup I got that hint…with a brick.
Sweettweety06- Thanks for reviewing, pet. LOL, love it and hate it, just don't stop reading it.
Magickal one- hey there, he is an ass right now, but he does have a redeeming featurette here. The relationship may be screwy- but whose isn't!
BlueAngel137- Max and Alec's emotions always seem to run high- sigh. It's a love/hate relationship at the best of times! But I guess that is part of being transgenic. It is fun when they fight though, I have to admit that the angst does me good.
Lostmarbles- hey there! Well I fulfilled your request and got Max and Dek together, even for a short while. They do suit don't they! And I am glad that you think they have chemistry. More soonas.
Sarah- Hey there! Thank you, sweets, for the compliment, I am glad that it still appeals. It is a long fic to read in one sitting. But I think its the height of compliments when you want the original character to be with the series one. Thank you so much. Hugs.
Elfie- yup, had to thrown that in! its weird but good and no, I wont blame it one heat, its all genuine emotion. Yes to transhumans, no to Asha, at least I don't think so. These old characters have this propensity to pop up unexpectedly. I keep expecting Herbal to peer around the corner.
Suffie- hey there, nice to see ya. Its not nice to have them hurt, but things will get better, promise. The banter is always fun and I present my thanks for the compliment.
Electricgurl- lol, thanks pet, question is….no. Alec wouldn't see Logan as a threat. He's too old, he's human, a broken human at that. he'd see it as laughable. Dek is far more of a threat than Logan could ever be. Besides Max doesn't even like Logan after what he did to Tara.
Ev- damn you had some catching up to do! the twists in the relationships are odd, I know but I hope they work and are believable. Thanks for the compliments, I am so happy that you think I've captured Max and Alec, as well as making my characters "real". Enjoy this part too.
L80bug- Thanks for reviewing, pet. He is starting to be more like himself again. it'll be great to have the gang back and talking again.
Mou- hey there, sweetheart, thank you for reviewing. Even once is great if you don't get time to do it. 10 times! Wow, I don't think I have read it that often! Thank you for saying so, I do hope to be a professional writer one day, who knows maybe Dek and Aiden will make it rich for me. Until then I am happy to keep pleasing you guys.
Toniboo- Hey sweetheart, sorry it took so long to update but I'll try to be faster. Left Behind is found by linking to my name and looking for fic under fayth3 or alternatively go to and you can find all myy DA stuff there, along with pictures.
Aku-neko- three days? Wow, it'll probably take me that long to read them too! It is one long fic..epic! its great that you like the direction the story and the believability of the characters. I often cried whilst writing it and love to know that others feel the same. I hope that my Max always has motivations behind her and I show this in flashbacks. Thank you so much for reviewing and it was great to hear from you. Enjoy this too!
Tiggi- yes, I know I'm sorry about the time lapse. See my AN at the beginning if the story. A spin-off…….. you are joking. Right?
Right?
Pixie Wildfire- Open your eyes, its all over.
Blissfully jaded. I have! Thanks for the review sweets. Enjoy this as much, if not more.