OK, so I'm kind of going in a different direction with this. Quite frankly, I'm not exactly sure where I'm going with this, but it all just kind of came to me so please bear with me. I will find a way to stick more of Edward in here somewhere (you really can't have too much Edward ...swoons).

Diana came to visit two weeks later. Surprise, surprise it was a gloomy day at Forks. She marched in like a general, her designer heels clicking on the wooden floor. She looked around determinedly before seating herself on the floral sofa where Marie had sat not so long ago scolding me like a child.

"So, what's this gloom all about?" She asked abruptly.

"It's Forks, Diana." I explained taking a seat next to her.

"I'm not talking about the weather." She said quickly. It was so like her. Her movements were always speedy, aggressive. I suppose I admired her for it.

"I don't know." I replied weakly.

"Oh stop it Bella. Sure you do. You can tell Diana." She said flashing her white teeth stained with red lipstick.

"Memories I guess." I didn't know how else to explain.

She rolled her emerald eyes.

"Oh, what are memories? Just images from the past frozen in time. I say we'd all be better off without them."

"No kidding."

"Bella, you have to let him go." She said slowly, gently. My eyes shot up to meet hers at this change.

"Diana, let's not start. I've heard this before." I sighed and got up to bring the coffee.

"Fine, fine. Whatever you say." She tapped her fingers against the armrest with force.

"You know what you need?" She finally spoke raising her voice for me to hear. "You need to get out of here for a while. This place is so damn depressing I don't know how you don't kill yourself. I'm telling you, if I had to deal with the assholes I deal with on a regular basis here, I'd be a goner."

I stared into the black pools of liquid inside the cups. The rain droned on outside. Looking through my tiny kitchen window, the green of the vegetation and grey of the sky intertwined to make a sickly combination. Maybe she was right.

I came back to the living room carrying a tray with cups, cream, and sugar.

"How do you like it?" I asked.

"Black." Of course.

"Diana, where am I going to go? I have books to write, my publishing firm is just in Seattle. I can't very well go off to another part of the country." I responded to her early badgering.

"I'm not saying leave forever. Just a vacation. An extended one preferably. Clear your mind. Everything here reminds you of him. You're clinging on to this poor boy. Leave him be, and move on. Literally move. Why not Seattle? Great night life, good music, awesome coffee." She raised her cup in praise.

"I've lived here so long. I don't know if I can." I felt overwhelmed. Why was I so pathetic, so passive? Maybe that's why Diana was my best friend. She was so unlike me, so strong, determined. She was everything I wanted to be. There was a kind of elegance about her that commanded attention. She could have her way with anything and anyone.

"Don't be childish Bella. People move all the time. I've moved at least 6 times in the past 10 years." She seemed proud, as if it was some kind of an accomplishment.

"Besides," she continued "you could find yourself a man." She winked taking another sip of her coffee.

"Diana, I'm not quite like you in that respect. You know that." The last thing I wanted was to go into a detailed conversation about Diana's latest sexual conquests.

"Oh right. Sweet, virginal Bella." She flashed a wicked grin.

"Hardly." I responded tight lipped.

"Perhaps you're right." She chuckled lightly.

I shook my head thinking back to my past. The conglomerate of images danced in my head. Some were dark and terrible, stifling my brain. There were many things I did that I wasn't proud of. When I lost Edward, I lost a big part of Bella. I just wanted that part to return, and I was looking for it in all the wrong places.

"Come on sweetheart." He spoke softly. His warm golden locks clashed with the steel grey of his icy eyes, intensified by the backdrop of the black sky.

I offered my lips like a sacrifice to a god that I'm not sure I believed in. They were soon enveloped in the sticky saliva of the handsome serpent. His warm hands slid under my shirt, tangling around my back like weeds. I felt a hallow ache and followed him to his apartment.

I don't know where, but I must have seen some small fraction of Edward in him. I shuddered violently at the memory. Yes, there were many things inside that head I wanted to wipe out forever.

AN: Yes, I realize Bella has changed, but please remeber that quite a bit of time has passed since Twilight (10 years). Bella's finding ways to deal with her grief, though they may not always be effective. Thanks to all the readers and reviewers. You're as awesome as vampires, which is saying a lot.