12:40 PM
As DAM wended her way through the usual irksome traffic on the eastbound LIE, her ever-attentive mother coddling her in and out of tight spots to maximize her speed, Bobby resolved to be on his best behavior today. It was his first foray into the arms of the Eames family since becoming their youngest daughter's lover, and at the moment, said daughter was too busy alternating between cursing at other drivers and sweetly encouraging her "baby" to pay any attention to his discomfort, either emotional or physical. Even with the passenger seat pushed back as far as it would go, DAM was, as always for him, a snug fit. He chuckled inwardly at that memory, knowing that Eames would likely not appreciate the joke in her current mood.
Being one of the youngest and by far the smallest of the five rambunctious Eames siblings had led to Alex being regularly and cheerfully tortured. Bobby had long ago surmised that this formative experience had motivated Eames' use of the force of her personality to overcome any assumptions based on her petite and delicate frame. He had witnessed large and imposing men, himself included, step back on a single glare. Eames made it quite clear that scary things, too, can come in small packages.
Still, decades of experience with her loving but volatile family inspired her to treat each visit like a battle; he could almost feel her checking and loading her significant mental weapons as they drove. He knew that in his own way, he was doing the same; there was particular reason for concern this visit, as they intended to "spill the beans" about their personal relationship. While Bobby knew that the Eames family at large would be happy, he also knew that they were in for some teasing.
Okay, a lot of teasing.
Okay, a lot of teasing from Eames' family, who, while none were quite as sharp as their "baby girl," still packed quite a verbal wallop, especially en masse. Sarcasm and dry wit were staples in their family dynamic, and one good zinger seemed to stimulate a barrage of others. Usually Bobby enjoyed the rapid-fire wiseass repartee, but he had never been on the receiving end before. He swallowed hard, wondering if sardonic torment would be the price he paid for loving Alexandra Eames.
Alexandra Eames herself, meanwhile, was considerably less concerned with any comments that might be directed at Bobby; she had made it clear from the first time he'd met her family that she alone was permitted to tease him. Mostly this was because she knew his boundaries; Bobby was a lot more sensitive than people realized, and she never wanted his feelings to be hurt. There was also the element of fear that the high-energy mockery would drive him away; even at nearly forty, her brothers could still embarrass her. She hoped they didn't try any cockamamie half-assed "Eames Boys" plans today. In her waking nightmares, she envisioned them cornering Goren and asking him his intentions. Just thinking of it made her snort in derision.
She felt a hand on her knee.
"You okay there, Eames?"
Distracted, she nodded, pondering whether she ought to warn him about what he might expect at the day's festivities. Deciding to play it safe, she said, "Listen, Bobby, if anyone in my family starts asking questions about our future plans, refer them to me. You are a grown man, and I am a grown woman, and we shouldn't have to explain ourselves to that motley crew."
Smiling, he said, "No way, Eames. They ask, I'm answering."
"No, see, Bobby, that will just play into their hands, and we do not want to do that." Glancing over, she realized he was wearing a shit-eating grin. Puzzled, she asked, "Okay, what's your answer?"
"My answer is that my future is with you for the rest of my life, and if you dare to disagree with that plan, I'll just club you over the head and drag you back to my cave." He smiled benevolently at her, ignoring the telltale redness at the tips of her ears, which usually indicated somebody was about to get hurt.
"You. Wouldn't. DARE. My brothers would LOVE that shit, and I'd never hear the end of it." Lowering her voice, she intoned, "Hey, Alex, finally found the guy who can take you on, uh?"
Bobby happily said, "I know. I'll be so popular for finally taming you, they'll be ready to adopt me and boot you out of the family if you argue. It's perfect. Mike helped me come up with it."
Later he would realize that this moment was the most danger his life had been in for a long time. The redness turned to purple, and a small hand left the gearshift long enough to inflict a nasty pinch of his inner thigh. "Robert O. Goren, the day you start asking Mike Logan romantic advice is the day you cease to have a romance! What the hell were you thinking? Logan's just like my brothers!"
"I know! That's why he was a great person to talk to! And I didn't ask him for romantic advice; just for advice as to how to deal with your brothers."
"And it didn't occur to you that while you have to deal with my brothers for one night, you have to deal with ME every night? Think about it for a minute, Goren. Who are you more afraid of?" She smirked, knowing the answer.
"Eames?"
"Yes, Bobby?" she said sweetly, certain a mea culpa was forthcoming.
"Gotcha." He leaned over and kissed her cheek, then wisely got his face out of the danger zone, surreptitiously crossing his legs away from her, in case she decided to damage any other parts of him. He was grateful they had already pulled off the highway and into her father's neighborhood; she didn't have enough time to do anything permanent.
To his surprise, after sputtering in anger and confusion for just a moment, she burst out laughing. He flinched when he saw her hand coming in his direction, then relaxed when she simply stroked his cheek. "You're going to fit in just fine, Bobby. That was so evil it was almost Eamesian. I'm rubbing off on you! Back on topic, though, feel free to ignore any attempted interrogation by my father, brothers, sister, or sundry in-laws. Our business is our own."
"Oh, no, I was serious about that part. If they ask, I will tell them that our future is together, in whatever form it takes. I'm in love with you, you're my best friend, and you will have a hard time if you ever try to get rid of me." He watched her, hoping this answer would be acceptable, at least in her eyes.
For a moment, Alex found it hard to speak. It was so like Bobby to come up with the answer that was right, both for her and her family. She was moved by knowing that he had probably worked on it; it proved to her once again how much he truly loved and cared about her. She smoothly pulled DAM to the curb, unlatched her seatbelt, and leaned over to him, kissing him for all she was worth.
When she was able to form a coherent sentence, she spoke with a voice choked with tears, "I will never try to get rid of you, Bobby. It would kill me. I'm so in love with you it scares me, but not enough to run. Our future IS together."
A bit taken aback at this display of open emotion from his usually restrained Eames, Bobby could only smile at her in response.
It was enough.
As she pulled back onto the road, mere minutes from her dad's place, she glanced over at him, "You ready for this, Goren?"
"We'll handle it together, Eames."
A/N – Hey there! Sorry it's been so long since an update, but I'm back on the horse now, so they should be more frequent. By the way, this story is now parting ways with the canon of Season 6; it's explained in detail in the note for my M-rated story "War Wounds," but suffice it to say I'm digging my heels in and keeping this flufferific. Thanks for continuing to read!