"But Steve, if the aneurysm is already leaking blood into your brain you may not have a choice."
"Danny please - leave me alone." Steve averted his gaze from Danny and closed his eyes in despair.
"Steve listen -"
"Please Danny - go."
Danny heaved out a heavy sigh and patted Steve's shoulder before leaving the room. He felt a sickening helplessness invade him at the prospect of failing to sway his partner, his friend, his brother to make a sound choice that would ultimately save his life. He feared that the angiogram would confirm that surgery was imperative for having seen him nearly stroking out in the car. But what if Steve still doggedly refused to go under the knife? Would he be able to convince him otherwise?
H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50
Early evening, Danny was keeping a vigil on a sleeping Steve when Mary Ann came in with two cups of coffee in hand.
"He's still asleep?" she asked as she handed a cup to Danny who gratefully accepted it.
"Yeah. It's probably best. The doctor said he must have peace and quiet and avoid stress."
"Kono and Chin left to get supper. I told them to bring vegetable soup for both of us. I hope it's okay?"
Danny offered a tired smile. "Yeah it's fine. I can't eat much anyway."
Mary turned to her brother sleeping with an almost serene look on his face. "I can't help feel this is all my fault." Mary was a wreck at the thought of being the spark plug of her brother's illness.
"Mary, he had this thing in his head long before you came."
"But if I hadn't been such trouble he wouldn't be lying in this bed. I provoked this."
"Don't be silly, Mary. You're not trouble, you're family. Besides even if you hadn't been here, he would have found trouble elsewhere. He's a magnet for it."
"I heard that," came the weak husky voice from the bed.
"Somehow that doesn't surprise me." Danny shook his head in disbelief as he stood from his chair and walked over to the bed. "How are you feeling?"
"A bit messed up."
"And the head?"
"I can handle it." Steve licked his parched lips as a signal for Danny to get him some water.
Danny poured a glass and dropped a straw in it. He then brought the glass over to Steve's lips and placed the straw in his mouth, careful not to jostle his head.
Steve nodded feebly and Danny removed the straw. "Do you have the results of the tests?"
"Not yet. We should have them any minute now."
Steve's eyes began to roam about the room.
"What is it?" Mary asked.
"I know there's something I have to do but I can't remember what." Steve was getting a bit restless.
"Perhaps you're thinking of Cat..."
"Shut! Don't." Danny cut in abruptly with a hand on her arm. "Not now." He didn't want to add to his partner's distress. "Right now Steve all you need to do is rest. No stress."
"No. It's very important. I know it is. I have to do this," Steve insisted as he tried to get out of bed.
"What are you doing?" Danny chastised. He grabbed Steve by the shoulders and eased his head back onto his pillow. "Lie down now. No walking around."
"Danny you know what it is I have to do. Tell me," Steve pleaded, his headache increasing in intensity.
"I don't know what you're talking about, babe. Really." Danny tried to calm his troubled partner.
At that moment Doctor Prentiss walked into the room with Steve's medical chart.
"Doctor. You have the results?" Danny asked expectantly.
"I do." He took a deep breath. "The aneurysm is leaking. We don't have a choice. We must operate."
"No," Steve answered curtly.
"Commander, there's no other way. A hematoma is already forming inside your brain. Soon the pressure will build up and cause a hemorrhagic stroke that will eventually kill you."
"Can't you release the pressure with a drain or something? You can instead drill a hole and not split open my skull."
"We could but we found another problem."
"What is it?" Danny asked apprehensively.
"It's a brain tumor."
The news hit them like a cannonball to the chest. Danny's eyes widen in terror and Mary put a hand over her mouth to stifle a cry.
"Luckily the tumor is small and appears benign and is located near the aneurysm. We can operate and remove the two at the same time, thus taking care of both problems simultaneously."
"What about radiation therapy?" Steve asked.
"Steve, come on –" Danny barged in angrily.
"Danny, please," Steve harshly interrupted his partner's train of thoughts before lifting his gaze back up at the doctor. "What about it?"
"Yes we could go with radiations to slow or even stop the growth if the tumor is indeed benign, but we won't know that until we either do a biopsy or remove it altogether. Either way, we need to go in there. And understand that it's not a hundred per cent guaranteed that it will succeed. You could go into remission but then again, the tumor might spread and become a full-blown cancer that we won't be able to eradicate."
Danny was shifting uncomfortably at Steve's wavering. Surgery was clearly the rational choice under the circumstances.
"I have to think about it."
"Commander I don't think you understand the gravity of -"
"Could you leave us alone for a minute please?" Danny cut in with a restrained anger building inside. He waited for Prentiss and Mary to leave the room before stepping up to the bed with a withering look.
"Danny, it's no use I won't-"
"Dammit McGarrett! Take the damn surgery!"
"Why are you yelling at me?" Steve whined and cringed at the deafening noise.
"BECAUSE," Danny paused to tone down, "because you're a jackass. You heard the doctor? The aneurysm is about to burst and once it does, you'll die."
Steve closed his eyes and pursed his lips.
"Listen to me, babe. LISTEN TO ME," he again raised his voice to get Steve's undivided attention. "I know you're scared. Heck I'm scared to. But if you don't have that operation you will die. Do you understand me?"
The pressure increased, creating unbearable pain. He squished his eyes together.
"Steven, I hate to see you in so much pain. And I couldn't bear to lose you. None of us can. Agree to the surgery, please." There was a tense pause before Steve gave a feeble nod. "Okay?" Danny rushed out of the room to hail the doctor back. "He said yes."
Doctor Prentiss went to Steve to confirm his consent to the surgery. "Commander McGarrett, do I have your consent to proceed with surgery?" With a face crunched up in pain, Steve nodded. "Good, Detective Williams will sign the release forms for you, is that okay?" Again Steve nodded, tightening his hold on Danny's hand as the pain exploded in his brain.
"Okay, prep him for surgery," he addressed the nurse and then turned to Danny. "I'll be back with the forms. In the meantime, try to keep him calm."
"Can you give him something for the pain?"
"He'll be taken care of."
Once the doctor and nurse out of the room, Danny returned his attention to his agonizing friend. "Hold on, babe. You'll feel much better once those things are out of your brain."
"Danny," Steve whispered weakly, cringing as another wave of pain shot through his head. "Danny listen. There - there's a sealed Manilla envelope inside -."
"Shuuuu, don't talk. Relax."
Steve insisted, again tightening his grip on Danny's hand. "An envelope marked Danny on it. It's - it's in the top drawer of my desk in the study at home. If anything happens -"
Danny leaned closer to Steve's face. "Nothing's gonna happen, you hear me?"
"I love you, brother. Don't ever forget that."
"I love you too, you big goof. I'll wait right here until you're back from surgery. I won't leave." Steve nodded in gratitude and squeezed Danny's hand.
Less than an hour later, Steve was wheeled down to the operating room with Danny holding his hand until they reached the doors.
"Okay babe, this is it!" Danny announced to his drug-numbed partner. "It'll all be over soon and you'll be back to your old obnoxious ass-kicking ninja self." Steve fashioned a weak smile. His eyes were at half-mast and could hardly move from being pumped up full of pre-op sedatives. Danny squeezed his hand one last time. "You hang in there." He then released Steve's hand and watched as the orderlies wheeled him inside the operating room.
H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50
Danny was like a caged animal, unable to sit still as he waited for news on Steve's condition. He started pacing back and forth in front of Chin and Kono who sat beside each other on the couch.
Before Danny could wear a hole in the waiting room floor, Chin grabbed a hold of his arm. "Brah, take it easy. You're making us dizzy."
Danny glanced down at his watch for the umpteenth time and started rambling like a lunatic, "What's taking them so long, huh? We should have heard something by now? What's going on? Is Steve okay? This is bad. I know it. I'm going to ask the nurses." The basket case started for the nurses' station when Chin stood and grabbed his shoulders.
"Danny, buddy, it's only been an hour. Give it time. Why don't we go outside and get some air."
"No," Danny shrugged off Chin's offer. "I'm fine, just a bit jittery."
"You could have fooled us," Kono chimed in.
"Why are you so calm, over there, huh?" he asked on an offensive tone. "Aren't you worried? You don't seem to be."
"Danny!" Chin was appalled by the insinuation. "We all are, but Steve's going to be okay. You have to remain positive."
Danny ran his hands across his face to wipe off the sheen of perspiration. "Sorry. I lost it there. I didn't mean what I said. Of course you're worried. It's just - you didn't see him in the car. He never complains of any aches and pain but man, he cried like someone was splitting his skull open and gouging his brains out. I never heard such a blood-curdling sound coming out of his mouth before and – I guess it scared the hell out of me."
"We understand," Chin sympathized with a consoling hand on Danny's shoulder.
"Maybe I should take a break and go fill my lungs with other than antiseptic."
"Good idea," Kono applauded the decision. "You and Chin go. I'll stay here in case the doctor comes out."
"Thanks cuz. Come on, Danny"
Chin nudged Danny toward the end of the hall.
H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50H50
Nearly three hours later, a weary Doctor Prentiss finally exited the operating room. He was still clad in his blood-smeared surgical gown.
No sooner had Danny caught a glimpse of the doctor walking toward them that he leapt to his feet. The doctor's drawn features were a portent of doom. Danny's heart sank before he could ask the dreaded question. "Doctor Prentiss. How was surgery?"
The doctor took a deep breath to gather his thoughts as to the best and less painful way to deliver the grim news. "The aneurysm burst before we could reach it."
Danny felt a stake had been driven through his heart. He stood numbed with terror, tears pooling in his eyes. "Don't tell me he's dead?"