The Doctor slowly closed the TARDIS doors as he looked at both River and Rose. Both of which where hoping he would be more successful than they had been. After he had closed the doors, he stood. The constant, low humming of the TARDIS was the only sound filling the air in the ship. The Doctor braced himself, he had seen new universes created and the destruction of the universes oldest species but this was going to be completely different.
"Doctor"
The empty space in the air was suddenly filled, The Doctor darted round confused. The hologram hadn't changed, it was still his past incarnation. Bewildered The Doctor approached himself, waiting for the image to suddenly change, hoping it would, but it didn't. The two kept a constant connection through their eyes, a minuet must have past before The Doctor had found his ability to speak again:
"Why?"
"I always take you where you need to be" It re-instated. The Doctor raced toward the image.
"No, I know that part, I got it. But why." He was lost for words, "Why me?"
The image maintained it's unsettling stare, it didn't blink, just kept staring at him. Like it was staring right into him.
"What? The only person in the whole universe I can actually talk to is me? Myself? I can't" He turned away from the image. "No, I just can't. Change. Please"
The hologram remained silent, motionless, and was still staring at him. The Doctor had to look away, he had to escape it's gaze.
"Please" he begged, his head turned away from it. There was a third small flash of light. The Doctor let out a silent sigh of relief, at least he was gone. He turned to see who he was now in the company of.
The image of River Song stood parallel to The Doctor. Her gaze still focused entirely on him, but she had a warmer sense about her. The Doctor felt a wave of different emotions. If he was being honest, River wasn't the person he wanted to see.
"It makes sense I guess, It had to be you, didn't it." His voice breaking, he sat on the small staircase. He looked round his old ship, this place he had called a sort of home. The light from the TARDIS console bounced off the silver walls, the low, steady humming from the ship was again the soundtrack to this confrontation between man and machine. The Doctor lowered his head, he had never felt so alone.
"It was for her, wasn't it?" He asked, not looking up from the floor. The image didn't answer.
"It was to see Rose, Rose Tyler. The woman I loved, who showed me a better way to live, who never gave up even when the rest of the universe had. Rose, who always faced her fears, who ran with her heart on her sleeve and never left you, if you needed help she'd be there." His voice was breaking into anger, he got up quickly.
"Is that it? To see her, so what I could help her, save her, make her life better than it is right now? What? WHAT IS IT?" He shouted violently.
" You're unhappy." The hologram said turning away from him. "There is never going to be anyone like Rose. You can go through all of time and space but you will never find anyone to replace the spot Rose Tyler has in your hearts. But you'll never admit it. You put other's before, all the time. Saving the world comes before saving yourself. I wanted you to be happy, so I brought you to the only person I knew who could do that"
The Doctor let out a small tear, she was right of course, there was never going to be another Rose in his life. Not even River could be another Rose, and that made The Doctor feel guilty. He did love River, but in different way from Rose. River intrigued him, the whole mystery to who she was, her sassy attitude, and flirtatious nature. But he felt, because he knew how River's story ended that he needed to get her there, her chance meeting with his past self in the library wasn't a chance meeting, it was a fixed point. Rose was opposite, he met her by chance. He loved her fire and spark, her sense for adventure, her compassion, her kind nature, the way she shone in the light of a new planet, her fighting spirit. He met her on a whim, but fell in love. It was like they were destined to meet, Rose Tyler and The Doctor in the TARDIS, that's how it should be, and it was. Until Torchwood, until the Cybermen and the Daleks, until Pete's world and the moment both his hearts were shattered. He had promised himself that he'd never let himself hurt like that again, but then Donna, Amy and Rory, even Clara. They all tore another piece of his hearts when they were taken. Even when he had another chance with Rose, he had to let her go, because the world had to come first and it was the right thing to do overall. It didn't matter that leaving her on that beach with the meta-crisis Doctor was the most soul crushing moment of his life, only to be followed with the lost of his beat friend. He had to sacrifice her.
The Doctor made his way toward the TARDIS console. Torn between two women he loved, between a sense of duty and what he wanted. The Doctor looked round the TARDIS once more, without a companion or friend, this really was just an old ship. The hologram turned and made it's way to the console, opposite to where he was standing.
"Just remember" it said coldly "Rule One: The Doctor lies. Sometimes even to himself." and slowly faded, and The Doctor sighed, still unsure of what to do.
"River or Rose?" He slowly whispered.