AN: WOW this one got hits faster than even Lemon Aid, which I am still working on so never fear! Also for those who may have been on the fence about Working Title, it now has a legit title, new chapters, and I know now what the end game will be. I won't give anything away but please know that it was a hard decision for me to make as I honestly liked both for girls for Rachel, mine because, well obvs I created her to be perfect for Rachel, and Quinn because Dianna and Lea make it so easy to see the love-laden subtext you can't not want them to be together. That being said I would so love to punch Ryan Murphy in the face *SPOILER ALERT*, really pregnancy scare? WTF RIB! Can Rachel Barbra Berry not catch a freaking break? There is no way she'd be careless enough not to use protection especially after what Quinn went through and…no, you know what? Now is not the time for this. *Takes a couple deep breaths* Sorry about that waaaaaaaaay off track anywho! I now give you the next installment of 'NYDKM' in which we meet the illustrious Ms. Fabray, learn about her past, her history with Rachel and some of the charming people that will be in her life during this story, before we get to the heartbreakingly angsty stuff that is definitely going to come.
Also as always I in no way, shape, or form claim any ownership of Glee or its characters they all belong to RIB, or any songs/pop culture references that I make along the way.
March 10th, 2013
"The moment I wake up, before I put on my makeup, I say a little prayer for you. Good morning Mrs. Calligaris!"
"Good morning Quinnie! When are you coming over for dinner again? My Toni's been asking about you all week."
Blushing slightly I try to bow out gracefully from her youngest obvious crush on me. "I don't know why, I'm probably the most boring person ever, all I really do is work and read; and since I work at a bookstore all I really have to talk about is books. I'm sure she gets enough of that from her Lit professor."
"Nonsense, any girl would be lucky to have you dear. You're a good girl Quinn, smart and kind with the voice and face of an angel. So tell me, what's not to like?"
'Maybe my not so little Quinnie Jr.?'
"Well…you see the thing is Mrs. Calligaris…*sigh* I…I ca-…I can't…I CAN'T COOK!" *queue Oscar worthy fake sobs*
Mrs. Calligaris gasps in shock before nods tearfully at that entirely true understatement, because that would normally be a deal breaker for any other woman her kids tried to bring home. "This is true, I wouldn't want my poor Toni to do all the cooking like I have to, and sadly for some problems there is no cure." We both drop the long running farce and chuckle heartily at this, remembering how I managed to burn the end product of her last attempts to teach me to cook. 'Noodles can burn in water, who knew!' "Well
usually I'd say there are exceptions to every rule Quinnie, and I'd fight you on this if my Toni wasn't so fickle. I swear that girl has more 'loves of my life' than I have spices in my kitchen."
"Now now Mrs. Calligaris I know for a fact that's a gross exaggeration…there's no way your kitchen is that big." I can't keep the cheeky grin off my face anymore, I adore that woman and her family but Toni is really something else. Loud boisterous laughs are my reward; it's almost a warm and comforting feeling that this exchange is such a routine for us. It helps knowing that I'm not completely alone in this world even if the larger than life Italian woman doesn't know everything about me. Nobody does, not anyone close to me anyway, its better that way.
"Oh Quinnie, if only I was able to swap you for my loud mouthed kid, my life would be so much easier."
With a playful smirk firmly planted on my face I ask, "Which one?"
Shaking her head at me with an amused chuckle, the woman who is both my neighbor and the mother I never had, shoos me off so she can finish sweeping up outside her family's shop. "On second thought maybe a loud mouth is better than a smart mouth. Alright go on now, before I come to my senses and decide to give the lot of you away; I've got to straighten this place out before those hipsters come by to pester us about when we are going to sell vegan oxfords."
Shivering in fake disgust I exclaim, "Vegans hipsters are just the worst aren't they? Personally, I refuse to trust anyone who doesn't love bacon. Fine I'll stop pestering you but only because I need to open up as well, I hope you have a wonderful day Mrs. Calligaris, and tell Toni that book she needed for her Psych class should be in today or tomorrow. "
"You too sweetie and I'll send Saul over around one with some lunch for you ok?"
With a bashful and grateful smile I thank my favorite neighbor and go about opening up my own little shop, it's not much but its mine and its home. It may have been guilt money that bought me the place and paid for college but I owned the building free and clear, my own personal Never/Wonderland a used book and record store. How was I able to purchase an entire building and open a small business in this economy at 22 you ask? Well I was born into affluence; my given name was supposed to be Lucian Charles Rotzler III, I say was because as almost soon as I was born I was put into the overstuffed family closet along with the other skeletons and hidden away, at least until I could be dumped off at the nearest fire station. After I was born my "parents" had lied to the rest of the family and their peers stating that I had died a few days after birth as a result of SIDS, however the reality was they were horrified to discover that their perfect baby boy was in fact a baby it, why did it take a few days for me to "die"? They were busy fighting with the doctors to make a decision regarding my gender and perform surgery to correct the problem. However all the specialists that were brought in refused to perform such a surgery on me as an infant because it could have serious physical and psychological ramifications as a result and they could not go through with it ethically, finally it was decided to just eliminate the problem in a more direct manner, I am fairly certain had this been biblical times I would have been left outside to die or been thrown off a cliff with the other imperfect children.
Instead I was dropped off in the middle of the night with no name, no diaper, and wrapped only in an old towel at a local firehouse after the family lawyer paid off the private hospital staff to keep silent about the birth. The orphanage that took me in gave the name Quinn because the director was really into a 1990s television show, bet you can't guess which one, and there I stayed until I got into Columbia under early admissions.
Now I bet you're asking yourself how someone with as an inauspicious beginning as mine finally came into the obvious amount of wealth that was needed to get me where I am today. Short answer? A fellow skeleton. You see as fate would have it another disowned and disavowed member of the Rotzler family tree was cast out for having the audacity to fall in love with someone and marrying the family disapproved of, someone poor. That's all it was the poor guy was poor, not even poor just middle class but that was enough to completely write off Judith Katherine Rotzler and cut her off forever. Aunt Judy and Uncle Russell had the last laugh though, Russell Fabray may have been from a less well off family but was an infinitely better business man than anyone that Judy's family had at their disposal; so by the time he retired he had amassed a wealth even greater than one of the oldest families in New York and had bought out controlling shares in all three of the family businesses. Karma is a bitch right? As there cherry on top of that screw you sundae my Great Aunt had always found the whole story of my untimely death a little fishy, so she did some digging, aka bribing of her own and though it took her seventeen years to find me once she did, she paid for my college education and left me half all of her estate in her will, I am sad to say that she passed away this past August, the other half went to my cousin Frank and I am proud to say that he has the family businesses well in hand, he offered to split partnership but I wanted nothing to do with the Rotzler family ever again. When I turned eighteen I took Russell's last name with my Aunt and my cousin's blessing and am now Quinn Fabray by choice.
After I graduated with top honors, I found, purchased, renovated and opened my little shop, with the plans to live out my life quietly and comfortably alone, then in turn I would leave my estate to various orphanages and youth assistance non-profits across the country. That was the plan anyway, but then my Aunt Judy had to go and make me swear at her bedside that I would look for love, that I understood that I did in fact deserve to find it and that there were wonderful people outside of the world of literature and I could find them if I only but looked. So after ensuring that the store would be in good hands I decided to take a cruise, I had never been out of New York and I assumed that a gay cruise would be the safest bet for me to at least make a friend or two, I wasn't holding out hope for a romantic partner…okay so I totally was but my books had make a romantic out of me without my consent; and so when I met her I allowed myself to be hopeful and tentatively happy if only for those few days on that ship. I was honest about my condition up front and explained what is was that brought me there and after hearing an abbreviated version of my life story she told me she was there to spend the holidays with her fathers, full stop. Okay not really, this was her actual response,
"That is wonderfully romantic and I sincerely hope that being here will enable you to feel more comfortable in your skin or at the very least with trusting in your fellow man and are able to make lasting and worthwhile connections on this trip. I myself am not here for anywhere near as moving of a reason. My fathers and I are
Jewish and instead of being bogged down in a freezing and religiously intolerant atmosphere of Ohio we tend to escape to warmer environments during the holidays both in climate and in community."
Obviously I was charmed, how could I not be? There she was one of the most exotic and naturally stunning women I had ever met; she may have been a girl from a small town and only a college freshman, but she spoke with more poise and elocution than most graduate students, and as far as her reaction concerning Quinnie Jr.? Didn't even bat an eyelash, well that's not true she confessed that she was "deeply curious about it having never met an intersexed person before but understood that it would be quite gauche to inquire about the specifics of such a delicate and personal topic upon first meeting me", other than that it was clearly a non issue as far as wanting to spending time with me. She was actually the one who sought me out the next day explaining that she felt it too serendipitous for two New Yorkers, who happen to live in practically the same neighborhood, to meet on a Florida cruise and not become at the very least acquainted with me or else it would weigh down heavily on her subconscious once we were to disembark, and then she said it the words that would be my undoing.
Suddenly bashful the previously confident girl ducked her head and hesitated before shyly meeting my gaze again from under her long lashes, "To become completely honest, I am hoping that you might want to become more than mere acquaintances with me, I would very much love it if we could at the very least become friends. Do you think you could want me as a friend Quinn?"
I should have known, I should have ran far away from her in that moment but I couldn't, I was captured by beautiful pleading and warm cinnamon eyes, by shy glances and demurring smiles. She was just so lovely, appeared so vulnerable in that moment, and so heartbreakingly beautiful that that's what I let her do, I let her draw me in and break me to pieces with her pretty blushes, sweet words, and tentative touches. It was the most wonderful two weeks of my life, I had never felt so accepted, so cared for, and I had never thought I would ever feel desirable. That first kiss was more than the cliché, I didn't just see fireworks and hear music, I felt as if I was being drowned by the symphony and consumed by the flames that singed my very soul. She was the first for all of it, my first kiss, the first person I allowed to see me, to touch me; it was perfect and more than I could ever have dreamed of.
When we had finally disembarked there was the promise of reuniting once we were home, of more, of a tomorrow and like a fool I believed her, five days later she became my first one last time, the first person to ever break my heart, and if I'm smart and God is willing she'll be the last as I have no intend to put myself in that position ever again. All I need are my books, my cat Figaro, and music; speaking of which now that the store is all set up and after this emotionally draining trip down memory lane I am in desperate need for some Ella Fitzgerald. I am so absorbed in my search for the perfect album that I miss the door opening and my first costumers of the day until I hear a nervous throat being cleared.
"I'm sorry but I'll be with you in just a moment." Ah ha found it!
Placing the record on the old hi-fi in victory, I turn around with a pleasant smile that is quickly wiped off my face as I can stare in horrified disbelief. There in front of me, in my store, my safe place is the one person besides the cold and cruel people that gave me life that I never wanted to see again, standing there with an anxious and pleading smile was the woman who wreaked me so brutally and so casually little more than a month ago.
Rachel Berry.
TBC.