"Hey y'all. It's Deacon. I can't come to the phone right now so just leave me a message and I'll get back to you," Rayna listens to his voicemail recording for what seems like the millionth time.
It has been about three days since Deacon's birthday. They are supposed to be leaving for the next leg of their tour tomorrow. Rayna is concerned about him because no one has seen him since his party at the Bluebird. She is worried that something may have happened to him. She is worried that he is falling back into his old habits.
"Hey, Deacon. It's me again. I'm just worried about you. Please call me back soon," she says, desperation in her voice.
She misses him. Each day without him seems longer than the last. He consumes her thoughts. She wonders where he is and what he is doing. She prays that he is safe.
Deacon is sitting on the couch in his dark living room when he sees his phone light up for the 7th time in an hour. He sighs, running his hand through his messy hair. He has been spending his time thinking about the situation. He is trying to cope with everything. He is trying to get his mind right before they have to go back on tour.
The song she sang at his birthday party had stirred many emotions in him. For this reason, he does not trust himself to be in her presence so soon. Hearing her voice on the phone would only serve to complicate matters further. He hopes that this time he is spending alone with his thoughts will pay off in the long run. If he can get his mind right, then he will be able to make smarter decisions when they go back on tour. He knows that they need more time than they have had to figure out where they stand. Deacon, also, realizes that they cannot go back to the way things were so easily. It will take time for him to forgive Rayna. It will take time for him to adjust to the fact that Maddie is actually his daughter.
His phone lights up again. This time it is a text message.
I just need to know that you're okay.
He sighs. He can practically feel the anguish in her text. He knows that she has been worrying about him nonstop for the past three days. The thought is oddly satisfying to him. He doesn't want to talk to her but he doesn't see any harm in letting her know that he is still alive.
Rayna looks down at her phone anxiously when she feels it vibrate. She opens Deacon's message immediately.
I'm fine.
She is glad that he is okay. She has been tormented by her old nightmares of his body lying lifeless in a ditch or in a dark alley somewhere. She takes a deep breath. He is alive. He is alive. He is alive. The thought repeats in her mind.
Rayna's phone rings. For a brief moment, she is sure that Deacon is calling because he is finally ready to talk to her. She is disappointed when she sees that it is just Bucky calling.
"Hey Rayna," Bucky says.
"Hey Buck. What's up?" she asks.
"I was just calling to make sure that you're ready to get back on the road tomorrow. We have a pretty full schedule over the next few days," he replies.
"I'm ready. It'll be nice to escape this town for a while," she answers.
"Maybe you should escape into your music and write a few more new songs like the one you sang the other night," Bucky jokes.
Rayna sighs. Thoughts of that night invade her mind. She pictures him sitting next to her, telling her that it had been a pretty song.
"I'm working on a few," she tells him.
"Good, Marshall will like that. The jet is leaving tomorrow morning at ten so I'll see you then, okay?" Bucky responds.
"I'll be there," she assures him.
"Oh, and Rayna, don't forget about the interview you have scheduled for later today to clear everything up about those photos," Bucky reminds her.
"Thanks for the reminder, Buck. See ya tomorrow," she says.
Rayna takes a deep breath. She knows that she may be faced with some tough questions about her relationship with Deacon during the interview. She hopes that she will be able to contain her emotions and maintain her composure in front of the audience. On top of everything, Rayna has yet to start packing for the tour. She feels like she has too much on her mind to worry about packing right now. Besides, she has an interview to get ready for.
"Yes, Juliette. I'm gonna be there. I'm not gonna bail on you," Deacon says into the phone annoyed at Juliette for interrupting his thoughts.
"Good. I don't know what is going on with you and Rayna but it better not get in the way of your duties as my bandleader," she tells him.
Deacon sighs. This is exactly why he has been avoiding talking to everyone. He knows that they will all mention Rayna and he doesn't want to talk about Rayna. He is not ready to talk about Rayna.
"I'll never understand why you let her get to you like this," Juliette continues.
Deacon has come to expect these comments from Juliette. She doesn't see Rayna in the same way that he does. She doesn't understand how Rayna makes him feel.
"You don't know how it is between me and Rayna or how it was," he replies.
Deacon can't explain it to Juliette. It is hard to explain to anyone. The only other person in the world who understands the depth of their feelings for each other is Rayna. They had been through so much together and it had shaped them. They had grown up together, experienced life together, loved together.
"I just don't think you should let it affect you this much," she says.
How can he not let it affect him? He had been with her and then he had lost her. He had dreamt of getting her back for 13 years and when they had finally worked things out, her lie had torn them apart. The very thought of it devastates him. It controls most of his thoughts throughout the day and follows him to sleep at night, tormenting him in his dreams.
"I'll see you tomorrow, Juliette," Deacon responds, ignoring her comment.
Deacon puts the phone down. He stares at the blank TV screen. He makes an impulsive decision to break out of his pity party and turns it on.
"Up next, the Queen of Country speaks out. Hear her side of the story when we come back," the talk show host tells the audience.
Deacon is amused at his luck. Of course he would decide to turn the TV on right when Rayna is about to be interviewed. He turns the TV off. A second later he changes his mind and turns the TV back on. He barely pays attention to the commercials. His mind is going into overdrive. He tries to convince himself to just turn the TV off but he can't fight the urge to see her from this seemingly safe distance.
"Welcome back. We're here with country superstar, Rayna Jaymes," the host says. "Rayna, some pretty steamy photos of you have been leaked to the media. What do you have to say about them?"
Deacon's heart races at the sight of her. She looks as gorgeous as ever. He can tell that she is forcing her smile but that is only because he knows her so well. To the rest of the world, she appears to be extremely happy to be at the interview. He stares at her intently. Even with everything that is going on, she still takes his breath away.
"I can't dispute the photos but I do want to set the record straight about what they imply. Before these photos were taken, my ex-husband and I had already decided to get a divorce. I was never unfaithful to him," Rayna answers.
"So you're saying that you never had an affair with Deacon Claybourne while you were married to Mayor Conrad?" the host questions.
"Never. My relationship with Deacon has always been strictly professional," Rayna confirms.
Although they have never crossed the line, Deacon would not classify the relationship that they have had for the past 13 years as 'strictly professional.' The subtle hints, flirtatious touches, and longing looks that they shared on a regular basis had been anything but innocent.
"What about your relationship with Mr. Claybourne now? Are the two of you romantically involved? Judging by the pictures and what we have seen from y'all on the stage, there seems to be a lot of chemistry between the two of you."
Rayna looks like she is caught off guard. He can see that she is searching for the right words. He holds his breath, anticipating her answer.
"We're still very close. I care about him a lot," Rayna says vaguely, avoiding the question.
"You were with Deacon for 11 years before marrying Mr. Conrad. Is that correct?"
"Yes, that is correct," she replies.
"Why did your relationship end?"
Deacon is captivated by the interview. Her responses are very kosher but he is hanging onto every word. He is hoping that she will let something slip that exposes her real feelings.
"Deacon was working through some personal issues and I thought it would be for the best if I gave him some time and space to deal with everything," Rayna explains.
"So how were you able to transition into a professional relationship with him after you spent so many years together?"
"Well, Deacon and I have always been very close friends so the transition wasn't as difficult as it might seem," Rayna replies.
Deacon laughs. Rayna is great at always finding the proper response to questions that have the potential to elicit an intense reaction. The truth is that the transition had been difficult for both of them. There were times when he would find Rayna crying over him in the middle of the night on the tour bus. He would comfort her and then he would try to convince her to leave Teddy, to come back to him. There were other times when Rayna would find him with a groupie in his bed. She would scream at him in a jealous rage and then look at him with her eyes full of desire. They would sing their love songs together during the day and dream about being in each other's arms at night. It had not been an easy transition.
Deacon turns the TV off and leans back into the couch. He knows that he will be tested tomorrow. He only hopes that he will have the strength to stay away from her.
Rayna sighs as she walks into her house. The interview had gone well enough. The questions had been simple enough to answer. Now that she has time to think, she does her best not to dwell on the emotions that the interview has drawn to the surface. Instead, she tries to focus on the positive things that will come of the interview. The world now knows her story. In a few days, the scandal will be forgotten. If Deacon can forgive her, they will be free to do whatever they please in public, without worrying about the consequences. The thought is a happy one and a devastating one at the same time. What if he never forgives her?