So, so sorry for not updating. I got a huge writers block for like a week, and then my computer broke so I've been on my kindle for like two weeks.. Anyway...Enjoy this next chapter.

Chapter 6

Katniss POV

The next few months Peeta and I fall into a consistent routine. He bakes, and I hunt. When we get home we eat dinner and then he paints while I watch him. I feel content knowing that he is right there for me when I have my nightmares. His episodes are still there, but getting less frequent all the time. Now, we have got them to where I can calm him down by just telling him its not real and that this me is. Of course, I don't think that they will ever fully go away, but they are manageable this way. We may be far from the perfect couple, but I have figured out that I am at least happy.

I really can't believe that for the first time in my life, I just cannot seem to stop smiling. I don't know if its Peeta's painting, my reduced nightmares, or my amazing days in the meadow. I really don't know but, I think I should probably just enjoy it. I'm almost to the gate of Victors Village when I remember that I don't have any game with me, so I can go visit him at the bakery if I want. Even though it hasn't even been a full day, I find myself missing him. The way his blue eyes sparkle, his smile that can bring me up even when I'm at the bottom of my depressed mood, and everything about him in general.

As soon as I'm about to walk up the steps to the bakery, I see through the window a woman with long wavy blonde hair talking to Peeta standing in such a way that obviously sticks her chest out at Peeta. My Peeta, she is flirting with my Peeta. It's taking all the self control I have not to just march in there and drag her out by her hair. Instead, I decide to walk in there calmly and slip behind the counter that Peeta doesn't know what hit him when I pull him into a long kiss.

"Katniss? What are you doing here? Is something wrong?" Although he is smiling, his face is full of concern at this.

"Yes, I'm ok, but nothings wrong. I just wanted to surprise you. I hope that's not a problem?" I say smiling when I hear a throat clearing and we both look over at little miss never heard of the star crossed lovers of district 12.

"Oh Katniss, I'm so sorry. This is Sarah. Sarah, this is Katniss." I can tell despite his sweet tone, he is very much embarrassed.

"Oh, well I'm going to leave you two alone. Bye." That last part she says only to Peeta. She is so lucky I don't go and wipe that fake smile off her face. I mean seriously? I come in and kiss the guy and she oooooooh... I know that it was only a publicity stunt back then, but we were engaged and we lost a baby in the public eye anyway. You would think that someone would back off after that. I look over at Peeta and I must be scowling because Peeta just sees my expression and starts full on laughing. He pulls me towards him and kisses me. When we break off he sees my face and asks me

"Katniss, are you...jealous?"

"No, why would you think such a thing? Jealousy isn't not my thing." I must not sound very convincing because he just starts laughing again. Damn it, he always sees straight through me.

"You are by far, the worst liar in the world, did you know that?" he says ever so sweetly before pulling me into another kiss. Then resuming his speech "At least when trying to lie to me." This even makes me smile. I think in that precise moment I realize just how much I rely on him, and I feel absolutely positively terrified. What if he leaves me? What if he finds someone who isn't broken, who wants a family, and someone who can give him back all the love that they receive. I love him so much, but maybe after seeing just how broken I always am, he will get tired of me. As he leans in to kiss me once again, I back away and run out the door. As soon as I get out of the door it starts to rain. Perfect.

"Katniss? What? Where are you going?" I can hear him start to run after me, but I'm faster. In the distance I can still hear him calling my name but I don't care. I just keep running until I reach the fence. Then I sit down in utter exhaustion and take a breath. I can just feel the exhaustion starting to take over me when my eyes start to close.

I wake up in the middle of the night screaming. For a while I don't know where I am, then I remember the events at the bakery. How could I have been so stupid? Why did I act like that? Oh my god, I just realized that its still raining and it's freezing out here. I have to get back home. I hope Peeta didn't worry too much. So I start to stand up, and before I know it I'm starting to race back to the house.

When I get past the entrance of the victors village I see that the lights of my house are on. I start racing towards the house and I quickly open the door and then I plop down on the couch, not even acknowledging the fact that Peeta is sitting in the chair by the couch just looking at me.

Peeta's POV

When she enters that door she nearly scares me to death. Her hair is soaking wet, she's shivering, and she's been out all night in the rain. As happy as I am that she is home safe, I'm overwhelmed by the amount of anger that arises from seeing her disregard for her own health.

"What the hell was that Katniss?"

"What?" she is looking at me sort of shell shocked that I yelled at her. I do feel bad about raising my voice, but not for telling her what she needed to hear.

"What do you mean what? You stay out half the night in the rain, worry me to death and come back like you didn't do anything? How am I supposed to deal with that, just tell me how." She is just looking at me with absent tear filled eyes. I feel so bad for yelling at her. "Honey?" She doesn't respond so I continue. "Katniss, I need you to say something, ok. I need to know that you are ok. Please Katniss, say something. I'm begging you. Please." But, no she doesn't respond she just keeps staring at me absently. O scoop her up and put her in our bed, she doesn't put up a fight at all. I know something is up now. I decide that I have caused enough damage for one night, so I go sleep in my old house for the night. It's only next door, I'll be there if something goes wrong. I don't sleep that night at all. I just can't seem to get the words It's all your fault. It's all your fault that she is like this. Echoing in my head all night.

When I wake up I head straight over there taking a plate of cheese buns with me. She is still in that exact spot I left her in on the bed. I set the cheese buns on the night stand and beg her to eat. After an hour with no luck, I just hold her close to me and rock her repeating three words over and over.

"I'm so sorry." I do that for most of the day and eventually I start to give up. Not on her, but on myself. I have to talk to someone about this. I can only think of one person right now and he is right next door.

"Haymitch! Answer the damn door!"

"What kid?"he seems slightly annoyed, but I don't care

"It's Katniss."

"What happened?"

"Yesterday we were having a perfectly nice time and then she ran off in the rain, stayed out half the night, and came back soaking wet and shivering. My anger got the best of me and I yelled at her. Then she just...shut down. She won't speak, she won't eat or drink, and she won't even look at me with any emotion she is just there. I really don't know what to do. Please help me get her back Haymitch." I don't even care that I've started to cry.

"Well kid, I don't really know what to say. You know how her mother got after slipping into that depression and she never fully came out. Although, we know that Katniss is a lot stronger, we need something to pull her out. Or we wait until she pulls herself out."

"What if I leave? I don't want to, but anything to help her."

"I don't know, I'd give it a few days to figure it out first. I will come over for breakfast tomorrow morning and see how things are going for myself. Ok?"I nod and then he retreats into his house again. I feel oddly better knowing that someone else is helping. Tonight I decide to try to get her to eat something again, she won't. Instead of going back to the other house tonight I sleep here tonight. I think about slipping into the same bed as she is but decide against it. She just keeps looking at me and I continue to beg her to speek and she honestly looks like she wants to but just...can't.

Katniss POV

Why? That is all I can ask myself all today and last night. Why did Prim have to die? Why is the rebellion I struck responsible for it? Why wasn't I able to protect her? Why do I keep continually hurting Peeta? I really don't know the answer to any of these questions, but I do know something. I have to try to fight this depression that is threatening to take me whole. I have to get better. I have to stay strong for Peeta, I just have to. I can't and I won't give up. I saw Peeta's face all day and I know that I am hurting him so badly by doing this. I want to apologize for this so badly but every time I want to say something, the words get caught in my throat and I can't. I wish he would wrap his arms around me and make all the nightmares go away, but I can't ask that of him. I wonder where he is now. I try to get out of my bed and every limb I have feels like a thousand pounds. Regardless I still do, I look around upstairs until I see him in my mom's old room, just sitting on the bed looking like I know he feels. I step closer so he sees me. When I come into his view he almost smiles. I just go over to him and have my arms stretched open wide. He immediately gets up and comes to hold me. I just hold onto him and sob. At last, I mutter my first words all day.

"I'm so sorry Peeta." He immediately looks down at me.

"It's ok. Just please don't scare me like that again."

"I promise. Stay with me?"

"Always." We steadily walk back to my room and we eventually fall asleep, with his arms wrapped around me. I don't know where tomorrow is going to take us, but as long as I have these arms wrapped around me, I know that I'm going to be ok.

I know I took a little bit of a risk with this one, but I hope you liked it. Things are going to get a whole lot happier soon, but we all have to go through the hard times to strengthen our relationships. Thanks for reading and ch 7 shouldnt take as long as this one did. Reviews are welcomed =)