(A.N. Ok, so people kept bringing up this whole Raticate thing and I was confused about it so I looked into it. I read the whole story of it and ehhh lol I don't like the way it's put out. So I changed it up :) SORRY FOR LYING BUT I GUESS I WILL ADD RATICATE. But yeah, ok, here we go.)
...Only one word could explain today. Just one. Gary emotionlessly looked at the people who sat on the pews, watching the man who spoke for the deceased. Tears. Too many today...No. Not enough. Gary hadn't shed one. Only one word could explain today. And that one word pertained to Gary more than anyone else: Unforgivable.
~The Day Before~
"Dammit, why must this place be so difficult?!" Gary yelled out as he leaned against a rock wall.
"Well, this is the infamous Rock Tunnel, Shigeru," Fuela said as she sighed and moved next to him.
The group had been fighting their way through the cave, hoping to eventually find the exit to Lavender Town. But this place was making Gary go crazy! If he saw one more Zubat...
Gary was broken out of his thoughts as his Wartortle trotted up to him, sitting down by one of his legs and leaning roughly on it. Gary would have pushed him off if he didn't notice how tired the small Pokémon was. Wartortle was using water type moves back to back and he was running out of steam. Excluding him, Niel was the only other one who had any water types on them. But that didn't stop the other girls from fighting. Still, everyone was extremely tired.
For some reason, the Onix were a lot more aggravated than usual. They were going around the cave attacking any and all Trainers and Pokémon. Apparently something or someone rubbed these guys the wrong way and made them go berserk. Gary would love to meet the idiot who made this happen.
That was when his Raticate decided to trot up, glaring up to his Trainer. He caught this Pokémon a while back and it was getting stronger. However, it wasn't really the best fighter. not to mention it had an attitude problem (much like himself).
Gary glared right back at the Pokémon, saying, "oh what? What're you pissed about now? I'm seriously tired of your damn attitude."
The Pokémon's glare deepened and it began to yell at him, pointing to where they came from.
It was probably referring to what happened earlier. Gary was fighting against a Zubat and called out Raticate to fight. But the Pokémon had this habit of continuously missing all of its attacks, which aggravated Gary and forced him to insult the little guy and call him back, using Eevee to fight instead. This was happening way too often and truthfully, it was getting on Gary's last nerve.
"Look it's not my fault you're accuracy is so damn low. So please shut up about it."
Suddenly, the cave began to rumble as more Onix zoomed by ahead of them. They now did not attack people directly, but were simply rushing through and taking down everything in their way. When they'd reach a wall, they would smash into it then turn to another direction. Luckily, they were all too far off to hit any of them at the moment.
"Shigeru, just leave him alone! At least he tries!" Liana said as she tried to catch herself before she fell.
"Yeah, well, it's obviously not good enough! So either stop complaining and get stronger or get the hell out of here," Gary said, ignoring the fact that he was being extremely rude to the Pokémon.
But he felt his conscious clear as he knew that they deserved this type of treatment anyway.
The Raticate once again yelled at Gary but Gary rolled his eyes, interrupting him and saying, "I don't understand you! Here, just- return."
Gary held out the pokeball, assuming it would return without a problem, but the Pokémon managed to force itself out, not wanting to be in it.
Gary was getting more and more irritated by this Raticate. No. All Pokémon in general! He wanted a break from all of them. And soon.
Another rumble caused Gary to look up at the ceiling, watching as some of the boulders at the top were moving. It wouldn't cave in, would it?
Raticate took this moment to let out it's fury and do a full-throttle tackle to Gary. At least just one to teach the boy a lesson!
However, Wartortle noticed the attack early on and jumped in the way to try and stop the hit. But Wartortle's body was simply pushed onto Gary, airing him out and slamming him onto the wall.
Gary coughed a moment, holding his stomach and bending down a bit. The girls watched as he was about to scold Raticate as if there was no tomorrow, but they all paused as they heard Wartortle cry out in quite an unpleasant way.
Gary looked down at his Pokémon and gasped as he noticed a crack in Wartortle's shell. The small turtle was cringing as his eyes watered, placing his hands over the area.
Gary looked up at Raticate, anger flowing through his eyes. Raticate looked frightened at what he did but stared back at Gary, seeming to not be too sorry for what he just did.
"...Leave. Now."
Raticate's eyes widened and he was about to retort but Gary cut him off.
"I said leave! I'm releasing you! So get the hell out of here!" Gary yelled as he picked up Wartortle, attempting to be fragile.
The Pokémon glared at Gary once again before screeching at him then running off. Although it was angry, Raticate began to cry, feeling disappointed in himself and his weaknesses.
The girls could only silently watch, understanding why Gary released it but also feeling sorry for it. Every Pokémon Gary caught wanted to hit him a least once...
Gary looked down at Wartortle, frowning at the crack on it's shell. Luckily, the hit didn't pierce Wartortle's skin so there was no blood. Still, his stomach was now vulnerable and the break obviously was hurting the small turtle. Can that heal?
"Here, let Chansey take a look at him," Niel quickly said, walking next to Gary and releasing Chansey from her pokeball.
Suddenly, another harsh tremor started and seemed to come from the left side of the cave. Gary looked up and saw Raticate still walking away, fading into the darkness of the cave. As the cave continued to violently shake, a sudden explosion occurred on the left wall, making the group fall down. Gary managed to land on his elbow, making sure Wartortle didn't hit the ground at all. But they had no time to relax as the screech of another Onix pervaded the air.
The girls covered their ears but Gary endured it for the sake of the Pokémon in his arms. He knew he would scold Wartortle about this later.
Tightly gritting his teeth, Gary looked up to try and find the Onix, hoping it wasn't coming for them. But he watched with wide eyes as it was heading straight for his Raticate who was lying on the ground.
Gary screamed at smaller Pokémon to watch out, but the screech overpowered his voice. He couldn't even hear himself!
Gary watched as Raticate was hit by the Onix, making him fly to the other side of the cave. The sound of any impact wasn't even heard as the screech was just too loud.
The next thing they heard was the slam of the Onix hitting another wall then turning another direction.
Loudly cursing, Gary looked over to see if he could spot the Pokémon. He saw nothing but dust and dirt in the air.
As the ringing in their ears began to fade, the girls uncovered their ears and got up, walking to the direction Raticate fell to.
"Do you see him?" Liana asked as she childishly put her finger in her ear to try to clear the noise from it.
"Hey there's no time for that!" Teres yelled as she pointed to the ceiling of the cave. Everyone looked up and saw the rocks violently moving. The roof was going to cave in.
"This way, c'mon!" Fuela yelled out as she pointed towards a path that was probably made by an Onix.
The girls all quickly ran in, Gary right behind them. But he paused as he noticed his Raticate lying on the floor, looking quite hurt. Gary looked down, wondering whether to risk his life to help the Pokémon.
Even though that Raticate frustrated him, he was still a being who was wounded.
Gary quickly put Wartortle in it's pokeball and turned to Raticate, calling out, "Just get into the ball! Return!"
But the Raticate merely turned away Gary, going against the Trainer's choice.
"Don't be stupid! The top is gonna cave in so let me help you!"
Suddenly the rumbling started again, giving Gary the assumption that another Onix was coming.
"Hurry you idiot! Return!"
Gary held out the ball but nothing happened, Raticate once again rejecting it.
"You seriously would rather die that come with me?!"
Although everything was happening so quickly, Gary felt like his mind slowed down as the Raticate looked up at him, seeming too weak to stand.
It no longer was glaring at him, but merely watching him. The look disturbed Gary as he could not comprehend what it meant, but it made him quite depressed...
A boulder came down and slammed against the ground, startling Gary. He gave the Pokémon one final look before running out of the area, hearing another screech of an Onix.
'Fine. He wants to die? Let him die then. I won't feel sorry for that thing,' Gary thought.
The brunette caught up with his group, slowing down to a stop as they took a breath. Gary put his hands through his hair, keeping his eyes on the floor as the thought of that Pokémon's eyes ran through his mind. It continued to give him a sickening feeling in his stomach.
"He...he didn't wanna come along," Gary said out loud to no one in particular.
The girls looked back at him, watching as Gary kept his gaze stuck to his feet. He felt...horrible. Did he really just let the Pokémon die...? No...it chose this path. It wasn't his fault. It was the Pokémon. It decided to be stupid. He tried to help!
Just when Gary thought he had time to relax, another Onix suddenly appeared behind them, coming in fast.
"Oh come on! Give us a break!" Gary called out as he began running, the girls right next to him.
They ran as fast as they could but the Onix was catching up fast. Gary looked back, watching as it came closer; it's mouth wide open and charging at full speed.
However, as Gary contemplated whether this was going to be his death or not, a sudden blast from the right hit the Onix and made him swerve, slamming it into the wall to their left. This seemed to have caused a major shake in the cave as everything began to move and some areas began to crumble.
The group slowed down then turned around, wondering who their savior was. Gary was the first one to run over to see and was surprised at what he found.
He saw a Pokémon and no Trainer. But it was a Pokémon he had never seen before. It was tall and blue and black, somewhat looking like a fox. The thought of pulling out his pokédex went through his mind, but the idea faded as his life felt more important than finding some information.
"That's a Lucario!" Kuron said as they ran up to it.
The Lucario nodded and quickly pointed behind itself, yelling out its name as if it could actually communicate with them. The way Lucario's voice sounded made it audible that it was a female.
"What? Is the exit that way?" Liana quickly asked.
Lucario nodded and looked around for a moment before leading them to the exit.
As they ran, Gary noticed the shape the cave was in. Everything was beginning to fall apart as Onix were heard ramming through the walls. This Pokémon must be helping people escape.
Gary thought about all the people who might still be stuck in this cave and felt scared at what might happen. He wanted to get out as soon as possible. He never wanted to go through here again and hoped that Ash never would either.
That was when a sudden chill of fear ran down his back. One question suddenly resonated through his head as he stopped right before the exit: is Ash in here?
All the girls ran out, feeling relieved to be out in the open. There were other Trainers right on the outside who were helping each other, a couple going up to the girls and telling them to back away from the cave.
Gary walked out after them and looked around, hoping to see that familiar face. If he wasn't out here, he either was in the cave or hadn't gone through it yet. But remembering the pace Ash had been going lately made him pretty sure that Ash must be close behind. Could he still be inside?!
As the girls turned, they panicked as they saw Gary running back inside.
"Shigeru get out there! What're you doing?!" Fuela called out.
Lucario called out as well, running back in and grabbing Gary's arm.
Gary pulled his arm away and replied, "wait! I have to check if... if Ash is in here!"
"That rival of yours?! What makes you think he's in there?" Liana asked.
"I don't know! Just- just a feeling."
Lucario shook her head, yelling at Gary in a way that seemed to tell him to stop being so foolish. But Gary glared at her then said, "look, whether you like it or not, I'm going back to look for him! It's just to check!"
Lucario stared at Gary for a moment, seeming to test his motivation.
"Shigeru, you're acting crazy! Even if he is in there, what makes you think you'll have enough time to get him?" Fuela added, getting frustrated at Gary.
"And I thought you kind of hated him so why do you care so much?" Liana innocently added.
Gary looked over to her, suddenly becoming very angry at such an assumption.
"I never said I hated him! I never could! Look- just, just forget it, I'm going!"
As Gary was about to run off, Graveler ran over to him, wanting to help as well. Gary was hesitant at first but nodded and added, "ok, but no slowing me down!"
Gary quickly gave Wartortle's pokeball to Niel and asked her to take care of him and that he would be right back. He allowed the rest of his Pokémon to stay out of their pokeballs to help others and to stay out of harms way. Giving the group one last look, Gary ran back in, hoping his rival was safe.
Eevee watched from the entrance as he and Graveler got ready to run back deep inside the crumbling cave. Although the small fox wanted to help, he knew that he would just be an inconvenience to the two. He also knew there was no way to stop Gary from going back in... The small fox nibbled on its lip, hoping that his Trainer would be safe.
With a deep sigh, Lucario decided to help them in their search. She was already running in and out of here to help others anyway. So helpers really wouldn't be too much of a problem. As long as they didn't get in her way.
The three of them ran through the cave, looking as far as they could into the cave to find any others.
As they searched, Gary called out Ash's name, yelling as loudly as he could over the rumbling of Onix moving around.
Suddenly, a few of them began screeching, which caused the group to cover their ears. One screech was bad enough, but multiple ones gave Gary a headache, making him feel slightly disoriented.
With a slight push, Lucario managed to catch Gary's attention and led the way deeper into the cave. She would run ahead and quickly search the place for any humans or trapped Pokémon. Luckily, she found none. Maybe the place was now empty.
"Satoshi!" Gary yelled out again. The fact that Ash hadn't replied back was lifting the heavy weight off his chest and he began to assume that maybe he wasn't in the cave.
"I- I don't think he's in here," Gary said to Graveler as he tried to keep his footing.
When he looked over to said Pokémon, he was confused by the way he was watching the floor. Suddenly, the giant rock Pokémon tackled Gary to the ground.
The teen was about to yell at his Pokémon but fell silent as an Onix broke through the ground at the exact spot he was standing on.
It stayed erect for a few moments then looked over to the group. It's eyes were an empty white and it looked as if it was almost in a trance.
The three of them stood still for a moment then watched as it began to fall back. Gary was confused by this action but panicked as he realized it was now coming towards them. It was going to hit them!
Gary quickly got up and ran, Lucario ahead of him and Graveler right behind.
Looking ahead, he could see the shadow of the enormous Pokémon hovering over him and getting larger. Out of utter fear, Gary shut his eyes but continued to move, yelping as he heard the slam of the Pokémon's body hitting the ground.
The slam caused him to hop up and fall onto his stomach, but he still managed to quickly get up and continued to move. Lucario then paused and grabbed Gary's arm, trying to talk to him but obviously failing.
Still, Gary could see that she wanted to leave and he had no argument against that. But before they could go, Gary took one last look around. It seemed that every other exit or entrance was now blocked off, except for the way they came. Even if he wanted to, there was no way he could look for Ash. He had to go back.
The three began to run back, Gary now accustomed to the shaking of his surroundings. They ran around the Onix that tried to smash them as it tried to turn towards them. But they luckily managed to evade its line of sight. This oddly made the Onix forget all about them and turn the opposite direction, slamming into another wall.
Boulders were now falling all around them and Gary could clearly hear different sections of the cave breaking down. It was like a large, nonstop roar of a Pokémon.
The boy tried his best to not look back, but the 'roar' continued to get louder and soon enough, he forced himself to turn around to see what was happening.
His eyes widened at the mounds of dirt and rock falling behind him, coming closer each second.
'The whole damn cave was collapsing!' Gary thought in a panic.
He turned back and tried to run faster, but his chest and feet were burning and he was way too far from the exit. He could see the light but knew this would be impossible to make it there on time.
Was this really it? Dying in some stupid cave for a stupid mission he went on? One that he didn't even WANT. All for the sake of a friend? The stupidity of Gary's actions finally came to mind, and as the brunette fell down, he had to wonder why he was so eager to help Ash. To sacrifice all his life choices for him...
The sound managed to reach him, roaring loudly above his head. Gary could only panic and cover his head, awaiting for the impact. ...Yet there was none.
The sounds of falling boulders and dirt resonated around him, yet he didn't feel any of it.
Once the sounds stopped, Gary hesitantly pulled his hands off of his head and looked up. The first thing he noticed was that the exit to the cave was almost completely barricaded. But with enough effort, he could slip through.
He then hurt grunts behind him and quickly turned to see Lucario and Graveler holding up a giant piece of rock that was most likely a part of the ceiling. That one piece managed to hold up a section that led to the exit. Luck seemed to be on their side. However, the two were struggling to hold it up.
"Shigeru!"
Gary quickly turned toward the exit, seeing Fuela through the path of rubble and behind the pile of rocks. Gary was about to crawl his way through but when he placed his hand down on one rock, it lightly sunk down as so did the rest around them. Gary froze, feeling himself shaking out of fear.
"Don't move! We'll think of something!" She said as she ran back towards the girls.
Gary wanted to yell at them to hurry, but he was too afraid to even speak. Everything around him was pitch silent except for the Pokémon behind him and murmurs from the exit. He looked back at the Pokémon again, noticing that Lucario was beginning to sweat and her arms were lightly shaking.
Suddenly, Liana's voice came through, making Gary quickly turn to her.
"Ok, my Abra knows Confusion. That can take you out without touching anything if we're really careful!"
Teres then pushed her way through and added, "And don't worry about Graveler! He's a rock type and can Dig so he can get out last!"
Graveler nodded, agreeing to the statement.
"What about Lucario? She's holding it up with Graveler," Fuela added from behind. The group then turned and began discussing what to do, but they were too far to clearly hear.
After what felt like a few minutes, Liana came back to the front and explained, "the only thing we can really think of is if Graveler can hold it on his own for just a few seconds and I quickly pull her out, or she goes into the hole with Graveler! First things first, let's get you, Shigeru!"
Liana looked over to her Abra and moved away so it could concentrate on slowly moving Gary.
The psychic Pokémon climbed onto one rock and looked right at Gary. Then after a few moments, his arms slowly raised up as his hands began to glow.
Gary gasped at the sudden feeling but felt himself slowly being pulled off of the ground then pulled to the direction of the exit. The boy didn't move a muscle, but he felt Abra move his arms and legs to get through tighter areas. Soon enough, he reached the exit and Abra jumped back, levitating back with Gary still held. Once his body was completely out, Teres and Kuron grabbed him before he fell onto the ground.
Gary let out a breath that he didn't realize he was holding then turned towards the entrance to see what would happen with the others.
The two still inside were apparently discussing what to do, and soon enough agreed to one idea.
"Will you go with Graveler?" Liana asked.
Lucario shook her head.
"So this way then?"
Lucario nodded.
"Right. Lucario has high agility. She can just make a run for it then Abra can grab her halfway," Kuron said.
Gary got up and moved next to Abra, deciding to also help by grabbing her hands when she came close, just in case the Confusion wasn't fast enough. He held his hands out right outside of the cave and looked right at Lucario.
Although he hated Pokémon and although he never wanted to connect with one, this Pokémon saved him and protected him along with many others in this cave. Without Lucario, many of them would have probably died.
So Gary wasn't helping for the greater good. He was helping because he felt that he owed something to this Pokémon and this was the perfect chance to do so.
"Right when you let go, Lucario, reach out for me! ...I'll grab you ok?! Promise!"
The thought of his Raticate suddenly flew through his mind, but he shook it off, knowing he had to think about this. He will save this Pokémon. He had to because if not...
"The cave might not completely break down but, just in case, Lucario, be ready to sprint and Graveler, get ready to dig. Got it?" Liana seriously asked.
The Pokémon nodded and kept their gaze on the direction they were going; Lucario straight ahead and Graveler to the ground.
"Ready...Set..."
Gary and Lucario stared at one another, keeping their eyes connected. He was sure that this would work. This wasn't going to be like Raticate. This time, he can save her.
"Go!"
Lucario quickly let go of the boulder and dashed forward. Graveler tried to hold it but seconds later it crumbled over him and Gary could see Graveler digging downward as rocks fell onto him. Once again, time seemed to slow itself down as Gary's mind watched every detail of this event. Abra now grabbed Lucario and practically yanked the Pokémon through the tunnel, causing her to hit some of the sides. Those didn't really affect her though, as she now paid attention to holding out her arms toward Gary. Gary in turn, pushed his upper body into the cave to try and reach her quicker. But the sounds grew louder and closer.
At that one small moment, Lucario looked up, seeing the boulder at the entrance coming down. And after that split second, she looked back down at Gary and did the worst thing possible: she smiled...ever so softly.
Gary felt her hands in his and he pulled back with all of his might.
The sound of Rock Tunnel completely caving in spread all over the towns surrounding it, but only Gary and the few around the entrance of the cave heard the grotesque sound of something crunching and a splat.
His eyes closed due to the cause of reflex but quickly opened to a scene he never expected. Blood was splattered all over the rocks in front of Gary and on his clothing. He looked down at his hands and noticed that he was gripping onto Lucario's paws, blood seeping out from them.
He didn't seem to notice as someone began screaming behind him and others either backed away or moved closer to him. His mind was only on the thought of holding Lucario's hands. Nothing else mattered. Something in his head told him that he had to keep holding on, even though in the back of his mind he knew it was pointless.
He then felt something trying to pull him away, but he merely held on tighter to her paws, keeping his eyes wide open.
"-io! Riooo! Has anyone seen my Lucario?!"
This seemed to have broken Gary's trance as he quickly turned around to see who was yelling. He saw a little girl with short, brown hair; two braids on each side of her head. She looked lost, or rather, as if she was searching for something.
"Rio! Where are you girl?"
Gary let go of Lucario's paws without realizing it and looked down at his hands, seeing how bloody they were. He then felt something drip down from his face and rubbed it with the back of his hand, noting that there was also blood on his face. He turned away from the girl as Niel went up to her and began talking to her.
The reality of this all didn't hit Gary until he heard the little girl crying and screaming for her Pokémon. She got louder and louder, sounding so sad and hurt.
He didn't notice someone put a hand on his shoulder and try to use a towel to clean his face. All he knew was that he had to get out of here. Away from everyone and everything. Right now.
And before he realized it he was running. Sprinting into Lavender Town, then past it. Gary turned to the right and went straight down that path, not paying attention to his surroundings. He knew he was in some sort of forest as he continued to bump into trees, but that didn't stop him. He simply continued to run...
Soon enough, Gary slowed down and stopped, leaning against a tree. It felt like only minutes had passed but noticing the shadows around him, it was already the evening. His legs ached and he was breathing heavily, practically wheezing as he tried to breathe.
He failed. He let her die.
"I promised...I promised her," Gary quietly said to himself, falling onto his knees.
He had never seen someone or something die in front of him like that. He knew about it and he's seen his share of gore-filled movies but this...nothing could compare to what he witnessed today.
The boy slowly looked down at his hands again and rubbed the blood onto the grass around him. But that didn't seem like enough as the blood already began to stain his skin a bit. The smell of it reminded him of iron. It was weird.
That was when he remembered he had blood on his face. Quickly, he grabbed the bottom of his shirt and rubbed it with all his might, then pulled away and was shocked by the amount that was on him.
At some point, anger started to fill inside of him and began to quietly curse, using profanity that he never really enjoyed saying. The words got louder and eventually he was screaming it out, gripping onto his hair and lowering his head as far as he could go.
He had no idea how to describe how much he hated himself right now. Everything that he's done so far just gives him more proof of how stupid he acted. And that didn't even make him feel suicidal! He didn't deserve the peace of death. What he wanted more than anything was to suffer. Some sort of punishment for his personality, his faults, his weaknesses; everything about him that made him himself.
But he had no idea how to do that. He didn't want to go about hurting himself physically. Mentally seemed like his best shot.
So outwardly he continued to curse and yell but inwardly, it was all directed to himself...
After who knows how long he stopped and a few minutes after, water sprayed onto his arm. He looked at his arm in confusion, watching the blood drip off of him, then followed the spray to see who was causing it: Wartortle.
Gary watched as he angrily shot a water gun at his arm then at his stomach. The pressure wasn't that forceful though. Was Wartortle angry at him? Gary could think of many reasons as to why he would be.
The water then moved to his other arm, starting from his hand and moving up to his shoulder. His clothes were now completely soaked except for the back. Gary thought about how he could catch a cold this way.
Wartortle seemed to scowl then walked up to Gary and began tugging at his shirt.
"You...want me to take it off? Why? No, get away from me," Gary mumbled, not really having the energy to yell.
Wartortle ignored him and continued to tug, climbing onto one of his knees and pulling the shirt over his head.
"I said GET AWAY!" Gary finally blurted out as he grabbed his Pokémon by it's shell.
But he quickly let to as he heard Wartortle yelp in pain. He forgot about the crack in his shell. Looking down at it, he noticed that it was healing but was still clearly visible.
At this, Gary roughly sighed and carefully picked up his Pokémon, moving him away and pulling off his shirt. Wartortle took it from his Trainer and shot water onto it.*
'Oh, he's cleaning the blood,' Gary thought.
"Use really cold water. It's...it should work better," he said to his Pokémon.
The turtle stopped for a moment then nodded, blasting it with water again.
Gary silently watched as he tried to take the blood out but it was set onto the fabric quite well and soon enough he gave up on it. He turned back to Gary and shot a warmer water gun onto his face, causing the boy to flinch and put his hands up. Yet, when he remembered Wartortle's intentions, he moved his hands and angled his head so the water could clean him off.
When he felt Wartortle shift his change higher, Gary let his head dangle downward and shook it so the water could go through his thick hair.
When Wartortle believed he did as much as he could, he folded up the shirt and twisted it so the water could come out. He then placed it onto his shoulder, walked up to Gary and grabbed his hand, pulling at it to try to make him stand.
He waited a moment then Gary stood up, remembering how tall this Pokémon had gotten when he evolved.
Said Pokémon then led him the opposite direction of where he was running to. He could only assume it was back to Lavender Town. He didn't want to go back to the Rock Tunnel. Ever. He needed to evolve his Pidgey and teach it how to use Fly so this could never happen again.
Gary lightly shivered as he walked, being wet and shirtless and all, but was thankful that there was no wind blowing. His hair was drooping down over his eyes but he could still see through it, although his gaze was kept on the ground. He was glad Wartortle wasn't trying to talk to him. He seemed to understand that Gary wasn't in the mood for it.
"No, I'm sorry, he doesn't want to talk to anyone," Fuela said as she held the front door open to the house they were staying in.
The person nodded and apologized, then said, "I hope he will feel better soon. We'll try to help as much as we can."
Fuela nodded and thanked the man, shutting the door and sighing. All these people were nice, but it was becoming overbearing.
Since there were no hotels in Lavender Town, the group planned to sleep in the forest Gary ran into. They usually would sleep in the car but they had to leave it behind a town back because there was no way their car could get through a cave like that.
However, the mother of the little girl who owned the Lucario insisted that they stay at her home. It was quite roomy and had enough blankets and beds for everyone (even if some had to sleep on the couch).
Gary, at first, completely disagreed with the idea, but he lost the argument as the girls explained on how it would be better. Not to mention that he was completely soaked and shirtless. So they decided to take the mother's hospitality and stayed for the night.
The first thing they did was get Gary to take a warm shower so they could find him better clothes. He was a cheap kid and wore the same clothes daily, washing them more often than necessary.
But since the blood was really stamped onto his shirt and pants, the decided to ask the mother if she had any clothing for him around.
"Oh, I'm sorry. Anny's father hasn't been around for a very long time, so no men live in this house. There is a small store here that should sell simple clothing for him though."
"I'll go get it," Liana said as she stood up from the couch.
Fuela nodded and let them speak. She decided to check up on Shigeru who was still in the shower. She knocked on the door three times and called out to him.
"Shigeru? You ok in there?"
No response.
She tried calling out for him again, but she could only hear the sound of running water from the shower head. Fuela became a little worried and thought she would have to break the door down, but was surprised that the door was not locked.
She felt nervous at first but knew that helping him was more important. So she walked in and shut the door.
From behind the shower curtain she could see Gary's silhouette just standing there, letting the water hit his head. She sighed and grabbed the towel that was sitting on the toilet and opened it.
"Shigeru. C'mon you've been in there forever, you're gonna get all prune-y."
Gary seemed to have jumped at the sound of someone else being in there then relaxed and turned off the water. He squeezed as much water as he could out of his hair then reached out for the towel, which Fuela gave. After he wrapped the towel around himself, he stayed in there, as if he was frozen in place.
"Are ya coming out?"
"...I'm naked. And you're in here so..."
Fuela lightly smiled, happy that Gary wasn't 100% out of it.
With a nod, she walked out of the bathroom, informing him that they were getting new clothes for him.
For the rest of the night, Gary didn't speak a word unless it was truly necessary. He hadn't the heart to speak. For some reason it just didn't feel right.
~Today~
"Shigeru?"
Gary turned to Liana who gave him a worried look.
"You know...it wasn't your fault," she softly said. Gary looked away from her and towards the pews again where he could see the mother holding her daughter who had cried more than anyone else. She was now whimpering and hiccuping quietly, her mother trying to ease her sadness.
'You tell me that...but do you really mean it?' That was what Gary wanted to say, but he knew it was best to keep that to himself. He always kept to himself. It tended to make everyone around him feel better.
So instead, Gary turned around and darkly stated, "let's get out of here," then walked out of the room and made his way down from the 3rd floor of Lavender Town's Pokémon Tower.
"Shigeru-kun." Gary stopped halfway down the steps, knowing who was speaking.
He didn't turn to the mother. Instead, she walked around in front of him.
"...Are you alr-"
"Not to be rude, but I'm tired of being asked the same question so many times," he replied before she could finish her sentence.
The woman stayed quiet and Gary only assumed he made her upset.
"Well...Anny wanted you to have this.."
Gary looked down at the woman's outstretched hand. There, in her palm, was a chain necklace with a blue, teardrop-shaped pendant on the end. It seemed to glimmer even in the dark gloom of the tower.
"It...was given to her by her father when he sent her the Pokémon egg that had Rio. She said you needed it more."
Gary gave the pendant a confused look before she continued.
"I told her that it would make more sense for her to keep it; that...you didn't need a small trinket... But then she said, 'I saw his eyes before he went to bed. He's hurting even more than me. He just doesn't know how to show it. I can tell that...he's always hiding'."
Gary's heart felt like it sank at this statement. With a slow nod, he grabbed the pendant and placed it around his neck out of respect. He would take it off later.
He felt his body lightly shaking as he walked down the long flight of stairs, feeling amazed that a little girl understood his entire life just by looking into his eyes. It made him wonder what the girl had gone through in her young life. And he just added to this pain with what he did...
With a deep breath, Gary slipped the blue pendant into his shirt and sat on the stair he was on at the moment, covering his eyes with the bottom of his palms.
His cheerleaders sat next and around him, Fuela placing a gentle hand on his shoulder.
"No matter what anyone says, her death was my fault..." Gary stated.
"That's not true Shige-"
"Think logically, Fuela. If I would've just left without checking if Ash was in there then she'd be alive and with her Trainer. Not to mention Raticate! I shouldn't have yelled at him, I should've-..."
"What happened with Raticate...He chose to stay behind. You tried to help him so you know that wasn't your fault. He could've saved himself if he wanted to and as for Rio, all you were doing was searching for a friend! One way or another, Rio would have gone back inside the cave to search for people. You didn't make a difference or do anything wrong," Fuela retorted.
"I just shouldn't have gone back in at all. Don't you get it? If I didn't go in, she would have left sooner and made it out," Gary darkly replied, feeling frustrated at Fuela trying to defend him. Why couldn't she just accept the truth?
"So you would've risked losing your friend? Stop trying to blame yourself for all of this Shigeru! What you did was what you thought was the best thing to do!"
"But he wasn't there Fuela! And what makes my choice good in any way or form?! I killed someone!" Gary yelled out, standing and turning around to Fuela who stood as well.
"You didn't know if he was there at the time! By the way our journey has been going, it would've made sense that he was in there! And what made this choice the right one is that at the end of the day you chose the right thing and listened to your heart!"
Gary was shocked at first then glared at Fuela, feeling his hatred fill back up again.
"Listening to your heart? No. Don't you ever say something like that because that is the worst mistake you could make! At the end of the day, I listened to my stupid heart and killed someone! I should never listen to my heart! All it does is hurt others and myself!"
Gary paused, feeling his eyes water at this conversation. He hated talking about 'expressing yourself' or 'showing what you feel'. It was all a sign of weakness and yesterday proved that to him and reminded him that he had to continue to stay locked inside himself at all times. Too many people wanted him to change, to be more expressive. He even faintly remembered his parents telling him to act out more. But obviously that wasn't the best choice. Look where it got them...
Gary quickly took a deep inhale through his nose to relax himself. He wasn't planning on crying over this. He didn't want to, as crying is a sign of weakness.
Fuela stayed quiet but frowned at Gary, disliking the way his views were at the moment. There was just no way to get to this kid, was there?
Liana sadly looked back and forth between the two and stood up, desiring to stop this argument.
"Listen, Shigeru-"
"No! Enough. We're done talking about this. Let's just leave and move on to the next city so I get can the badges I need. All of 'this'," Gary said as he moved his hands to form a large circle. "All of this was just a pit stop that severely slowed me down. I don't know what you guys are gonna do but I'm not planning on letting a bunch of girls slow me down."
At that, Gary sped down the stairs but almost tripped because of who he saw at the end. He couldn't explain the way this made him feel, but all he knew was that his anger seemed to have flown right out of the window.
"Gary. Hey. We're always meeting up some place, huh?" Ash nonchalantly asked. He was preparing himself for a rude remark, as Gary always had one when they met. It made the shorter Trainer wonder whether Gary acted like this towards everyone else. So far it seemed that way.
But today, Gary was silent. He looked at Ash with wide eyes, amazed that he was there to begin with.
Ash gave Gary a confused look then added, "What? You look like you just saw a ghost. I heard that there are some in here, actually. Did you find any?"
"..I...u-uh...Yeah. Caught a few of them too," Gary lied.
"You can catch them?! Then I'm definitely catching some too!" Ash said as he gave Gary a challenging look. He expected Gary to be mean to him. Gary didn't know whether to take that as a good thing or not.
"Oh, did you guys hear what happened?" Misty said.
"The Rock Tunnel caved in! Apparently some members from Team Rocket were messing with this sound system that made the Onix go crazy. They said they somehow harbored a sound that came from Lavender Town itself and tried to use it against them. But the sounds made the Rocket members go crazy and kill themselves..."
Gary's eyes widened at this. So much for wanting to get the people who did this.
He looked away from her for a moment then chuckled, replying, "yeah. That was pretty wild to hear about. Makes it easier to leave the place."
"We also heard there were some Trainers still in there and they had to run out of there. Good thing we weren't part of that huh? I probably would've died trying to find my way through that place quickly," Ash said with a smile.
The younger Trainer laughed at his grim joke, but the cheerleaders all turned to Gary, expecting something bad, but Gary only laughed as well and replied, "same here! Where were you when this all happened?"
"We were already in the Pokémon Center here in Lavender Town."
"Yeah, luckily we made it out before those Onix went wild," Misty added.
"What about you? Where were you guys?" Ash innocently asked.
Gary looked at Ash as he realized that this question was directed towards him. The question made him think of where they were, what had happened, and what he caused. The feelings were so dark that Gary somehow lost the urge to lie.
"Oh uhm...u-uh," the brunette lightly laughed, finding it odd that he couldn't come up with a lie on the spot like he usually does. His heart just felt so heavy, as if it was trying to break out of his chest.
More than anything, he was extremely happy that Ash was alive. He fought his thoughts all night, wondering whether the boy was alive or not, so seeing him here, having a conversation with him made him feel practically ecstatic.
But at the same time, it hurt because it proved that he truly went back into that cave for nothing. How stupid could he be?
As he continued to stutter, Gary looked back at the girls, as if asking for some help. They expected Gary to be happy as his friend was alive and well. But oddly enough, he seemed like he just wanted to leave.
Teres quickly jumped in, saying, "we stayed in a local's house, just admiring the place yesterday! As for today, we were here! Shigeru just caught a Cubone, you know?"
Niel grabbed his wrist and nudged him to continue down the stairs, curling some pink locks around her finger. "Oh, but we couldn't find the grown-up Marowak that is said to have been here."
"You know, I doubt there are any left," Fuela quickly added.
"Alright girls, let's take Shigeru out of here, he's got A LOT to accomplish!" Liana loudly said as they practically encircled the boy.
"Wait, Gary!"
"No time Satoshi! We have to-"
"Gary! Hey- will you just- Look at me!"
Ash grabbed the brunette's wrist, yanking him back and away from the girls so he could look at his face. Gary stared back at Ash, truly not knowing what to say.
...No. He did.
...He wanted to tell him that he was so worried about him. That he thought he could've been in that cave and he risked his own life just to find him. He wanted to hold him and cry and smile and laugh as he felt so amazingly happy that his friend wasn't harmed in any way or form. More than anything though, he wanted to tell him how happy he was to see him. That every single damn time he saw him, something in his chest grew and flurried, making his head feel confused and blurred. That he wanted to be his best friend again and hang out with him, take an adventure with him, reach every part of this earth with him. And he had no idea why.
But nothing came out. He only stood there, enjoying the fact that this being was right in front of him. He felt Ash's hand holding onto his wrist and looked down, lightly smiling at it. Slowly, he turned his hand and held Ash's wrist as well. Ash noticed this but also stayed quiet for a moment, analyzing Gary's face.
"Your cuts...They've gotten better...And you're not limping anymore."
Gary had forgotten about the S. S. Anne. It hadn't been that long ago, but certain events seemed to have clouded Gary's memory, as the past really didn't seem as important compared to the now.
"...Yeah."
"...Look, even though we argue a lot, I'm just happy to see that you've gotten-" but Ash was cut off by Gary suddenly pulling him in and embracing him.
Everyone stood there in shock; even Gary felt amazed by his own actions. But he didn't care. He just wanted to hold this idiot. Even if it was for a little while.
Gary gripped onto the back of his jacket, feeling like if he let go he would lose something very important.
"...Gary? Uhm..." Ash lightly squirmed in Gary's hold, but froze when he felt Gary's pulse beat at such a high pace. He also noticed that he was lightly shaking from holding on so tightly.
"Gary...What happened? What is it?" Ash whispered so only Gary could hear.
But Gary stayed silent. He couldn't tell him about all this. Ash would probably pity him and they would get close. He had to stop and continue telling him to keep going; even though he himself wanted to stop.
After another long moment, Gary let go of Ash, letting his hands slide down his arms. He took a few steps back and chuckled, trying to play off some lie he suddenly formed.
"Just giving you something you probably will never get except from your mother. Look, I don't want to be slowed down anymore. Smell ya later!"
As Gary turned, he knew that Ash would come after him. Ash had this habit where he believed that there was this fantastic greatness in everyone and he always wanted to help them find it. But he had to realize that there was none of that inside of Gary.
So before Ash could call out for him, Gary held out his hand and pressed it onto Ash's chest. He was about to say something that he would probably regret afterwards, but knew it was for the best.
"Satoshi...You won't see me for a while. I'm going ahead and becoming the Pokémon Champion. If I ever see you before that, I will battle with you. Without hesitation."
At that, Ash frowned and pushed his hand away, replying, "why is it that when something happens, you put up an even bigger wall? Why do you have to act like this? Why can't you just be a nice person and say 'good luck' or 'may the best person win'?! Stop pushing your emotions onto other people!"
"I act this way because I see no way for you to win Satoshi-kun! If you can't beat me, a beginner, what makes you think you can beat any other Gym Leader or the Elite Four? What makes you think you can see and catch every Pokémon in the world when you have one Trainer in your way?"
At this, Ash stayed quiet and looked down, feeling upset. The boy didn't reply so Gary found this the right moment to leave. But as he reached the stairs to go down to the first floor, he heard Ash yell out, "I will beat you!"
"You may be doing better now when it comes to what we have to do for the professor. But when it comes to our LIVES in general, I'm doing better than you ever could! So go ahead! Make it to the Elite Four before me! Become the Champion! Because right when you do, I will be RIGHT there to take you down!"
Gary watched as Ash glared at him and blushed out of anger. It was a cute look that suited his personality. The brunette scoffed and left without another word, glad that he said what he said. Things were finally getting back to normal.
That night, the group stayed on Route 8, sleeping outside on blankets so they could watch the night sky.
The area consisted of a forest on one side then a huge, empty meadow in between it all. There was a dirt path that you could follow to get to the next city, but it was quite far and it was late. So they went to the middle of the meadow and laid there until dawn came.
It was already past midnight but Gary could not sleep. He just watched the sky and a few Pokémon fly by. Too many events have been occurring this past month or so. And Gary wanted it to end. He just wanted to finish this quest and leave the past behind.
Why was that so hard though?
The Trainer sat up, pulling his legs up to lean his arms against them. He looked around at the girls that slept behind him, some with their Pokémon out and others wrapped around blankets. He then looked forward and sighed, debating whether he should leave right now or not.
Technically, these girls were slowing him down more than anything. If he didn't go on that cruise, he could've past the Rock Tunnel with ease.
It would be easier too. They don't have a car at the moment so they would be walking now. Would they really want that anyway? If he left now, he could simply provide for himself and his Pokémon and not care about anyone else.
Making up his mind, Gary got up and began quietly packing his things.
While doing so, he woke up Eevee, who was lying close to him. The Pokémon got up, watching his Trainer in confusion.
Once Gary grabbed everything he whispered to Eevee, "c'mon let's go."
The Pokémon's eyes widened and he turned around, getting ready to wake the others up.
"No, no. We have to go. Without them."
The Pokémon turned to him, seeming confused and upset.
"They keep slowing me down, Eevee. If we leave now, we can just go our separate ways without any arguing. And we can finally get a move on."
Eevee looked back at the girls who had been so kind to him for this past month or so. Although he had to obey his Trainer, he didn't want to just leave these people behind. And he knew that his Trainer didn't want to either...right?
So Eevee looked back at Gary and shook his head. Gary sighed and went to pick up Eevee but he jumped back and violently shook his head, looking up at Gary with pleading eyes.
The Trainer went down on one knee, hoping to convince his Pokémon that this was for the best.
"Eevee, don't make me force you..."
But Eevee kept his place, not breaking his stare with the boy. Gary looked away, running one hand through his hair, then looked back at his first Pokémon.
"Why? Give me a good reason."
Gary thought he had won this conversation because their was no way a Pokémon could express such an answer. But Eevee ran over to Gary and jumped onto his bent knee then placed his paws onto his chest. He broke his gaze from Gary's eyes and looked down to his chest, as if searching for something. Then he picked up his right paw and placed it right on the location of Gary's heart. Gary watched as Eevee looked back up to him and patted the area a few times. He understood what Eevee was trying to say but he shook his head.
"They're just a fanclub, Eevee. I can leave them behind whenever I want and not feel any sorrow about it. And even if I have considered them as friends, it's not hard to leave those behind either. Especially if you benefit from it."
Eevee looked shocked for a moment then turned around, looking toward the direction of The Rock Tunnel. His ears slightly went down and he looked back at Gary who was now looking that way as well.
It hurt to look at it. That hole in his chest felt as if it was getting larger every time he gazed upon it.
"That's the reason I want to leave Eevee. Don't you get it? If we didn't get on that ship earlier, we could've made it here faster and we would've avoided all these problems. Right?"
Eevee wanted to argue but it knew that Gary was technically right.
The Trainer then picked up his Pokémon and stood up, placing him onto his shoulder. Eevee silently climbed onto it and laid down, fitting nicely onto the small shoulder.
Gary then took a deep breath and began walking away, hoping his footsteps through the grass were not loud enough to wake the girls.
As he continued, he heard Eevee begin to sniff and shiver. He knew that he was crying and was trying to ignore the sound. But being as Eevee was one of the two who was with him throughout all of this, he couldn't help having a strong emotional attachment to the small fox.
He stopped walking and picked up Eevee with both of his hands, one under him and the other on his back. Eevee's eyes were shut tightly and it bit its bottom lip as it cried.
"Stop it, Eevee. C'mon, I can't do this if you're like that..."
He watched his Pokémon begin to break down and couldn't help but think that, internally, this is how he feels. Tears streamed down the small fox's face and that made Gary groan in anger, pulling Eevee into an embrace.
"You gotta be strong, little guy. As rude and mean as I am, I always...lie when I say I don't need you. But you know that. You know I need you guys to do this huge quest."
Gary continued to hold his Pokémon, rubbing its small back and moving side to side. Since when did he get so motherly over his Pokémon like this? He decided not to tell anyone about it.
Gary looked over to the path he was planning on walking through. It led to Celadon City if he was right. Although the name didn't really matter to him. As long as there was a Gym Leader to beat, then that was the next destination. Could he really go down this path with Eevee like this? His crying didn't sound as if it was going to stop anytime soon.
So with another defeated sigh, Gary sat on the grass and put his luggage down. He wasn't too far off from the girls, but it was enough to talk in a normal tone.
He placed Eevee down onto the grass in front of him, his legs wrapping around the Pokémon. Eevee sniffed and tried to stop crying as he looked up at his Trainer.
Gary petted him and looked down to the ground in front of him, feeling confused on what to do.
In full honesty, he didn't know whether he was doing the right thing or not by leaving. Every choice had its positive and negative reactions...
Amazingly, Gary felt his eyes watering. He didn't realize that this small Pokémon had such an effect on him. Once again, he had to wonder when they became this close. Maybe it was during the many battles they fought together. Whenever Gary was in any sort of bind, he would either call out Wartortle or Eevee to save the day. It was a natural reaction at some point to call them when necessary. Maybe having so much trust in them during a physical problem brought trust in emotional problems as well.
So, fully trusting Eevee, Gary let the tears he held inside fall out. He made no sound or face; just cried silently, letting them drip down his cheeks and onto the grass.
"I hate myself, you know..."
Eevee looked up at Gary, watching him finally speak about how he felt inside.
"I never told anyone. Never found in necessary really... But hey, you can't talk so I can just treat you like a journal or something," he sarcastically said as he sniffed afterwards.
"I really...really hate myself. I have no idea when it started but the hatred has been growing ever since I started this stupid journey. It got worse when I met the girls and obviously when we came here... I guess I do because,"
Gary looked up to the sky now; sighing then lightly laughing.
"Everything I do. It just- I ruin it. Sure I'm a good Trainer, I can plan the battle well and win without a problem; I can fight all my battles. But in the end, what the hell does that accomplish? I win. So what?"
Gary looked down at Eevee, feeling quite stupid as he opened himself up. But oddly enough, the Pokémon had stopped crying and was only sniffing, looking up and intently listening to Gary. He began to pet him again as he continued.
"This is why I want to leave. I just want to get this over with. Let go of all the stupid crap I've ever done and just keep going. And honestly, as much as it pains me, I need you guys for this," he said with a smile at the end.
Eevee smiled back, understanding that the insult was a joke.
He then climbed up onto Gary's leg and looked over to the girl's again. He wasn't crying anymore but he seemed to understand a little more.
With a tiny gulp, Eevee jumped off of Gary and ran over to his bag, opening it up and rummaging inside.
Gary wiped the tears off of his face and turned towards Eevee, waiting to see what he would take out. When he came back to Gary, he saw him dragging a piece of paper and pencil in his mouth. Gary chuckled at the idea, but took the items, looking at them for a moment then down at Eevee.
"I guess it would be better to tell them then just leave, huh? Wouldn't want anyone worrying."
Eevee nodded and climbed back onto Gary's shoulder, watching as he wrote a thoughtful note.
Once he finished, he gave the folded paper to Eevee who bit onto an end and ran back to the girls, quietly stuffing the note in one of their bags. Not completely inside so it could be hidden, but enough so they could notice.
Eevee then ran back and Gary picked him up, putting him on his shoulder again. He looked over to the girl's who, although they were just a fanclub, were such kind people that he would never forget. But he knew he had to move on.
"...Thanks guys. For all the help and fun moments. Even though there were only a few," he said out loud.
Eevee lightly yelled out it's name, waving at the girls and beginning to cry again.
"...Let's go," Gary said as a cool breeze passed by them.
Eevee sadly smiled, but came to accept this choice. Although it hurt to leave his friends behind, he knew he preferred Gary over anyone else (as annoying as his Trainer can be sometimes).
Gary soon made it to the dirt path and as he walked to the new city, all his sorrows, his pain, and the feelings kept from the past events all seemed to fall away with the tears dripping off of his face. He felt that this new beginning was going to be better. Much better.
A.N. ASJHGFLKGDKL wow this is long lol I haven't written a long chapter in a long time. I think this one has many feels, especially the end.
Amazingly, I felt more emotional writing him leaving rather than the deaths and his depression about it. Something about him leaving them just made me so sad. Like, leaving all your problems behind to start anew. Lol I did this when I first went to college. I honestly prefer leaving all others behind once you start a new path on your own. Am I the only one who thinks this way? Sure a few small connections are cool, but a BRAND NEW start. It's an easing feeling.
ANYWAY XD the * I put wasn't really for anything specific except for OHMYGAWD SHIRTLESS SHIGERU YES XD Lol Yes. I fangirl over my own scenes this way XD
Tell me what you think. Were the sad scenes bland? (If so just put on sad soundtracks and music, trust me, you will feel lol I was listening to IO (This Time Around) by Helen Stellar.)
Were there any scenes that you thought could have been better? And most important question! Do you think Gary's choice was for the best? There is no right or wrong but I want to know what you guys think.
R&R for me :) Let me know that this is still a good story and if I have any stupid grammar problems ^_^