1001 Relena Deathfics

11-20: Death by Video Game

Number 11: Death by Hitman.

Relena 11, unhampered by any kind of inhibition, skipped merrily through muddy puddles, unaware that she was being watched by a tall, sinister bald man. (No, not Richard O'Brian) As she stopped for a moment to catch her breath, the man known only as "Agent 47" or "Mr. Byrd" as his friends call him, crept up behind her, wrapping a garotte wire around her neck and leaning back. Relena 11 was able to struggle patheticaly for a few seconds before gravity crushed her throat.

Number 12: Death by Worms.

strolling through the grass one day, Relena 12 was shocked when a grenade landed next to her. Now, unlike her predecessors, this Relena was smart. So, she ran, dodging grenades, bombs, old women, exploding sheep, even the Sally Army. Then, as a huge shadow fell over her, and she stooped to help the poor shadw up and opologise for tripping it up, she was squished by a concrete Donkey, while off in the distance, Agent Dennis, Jegg, Tapper and 200 Ponies laughed there wormy little socks off.

Number 13: Death by 12-foot Sword.

As Relena 13 cantered through the mountains, she came across a young woman lain unmoving in the middle of the path. Naturaly concerned, Relena 13 tried to help her. Meanwhile... "Guts! Guts! There's a bad lady tryin' to hurt Casca!" Back with Relena...
"Raaaggghhh!!!" Relena looked up in shock as a big, big man wielding a 12-foot sword lunged, chopping her up into little bitty pieces.

Number 14: Death by Ninja.

One day, upon hearing that lots of children had been kidnapped and were being brainwashed and turned into dope dealers, Relena 14 decided to take matters into her own clammy hands. She made her way to the docks where the kidsies were being kept, and, amazingly, managed to slip past the guards. However, as she was freeing one of the kidsies, she was killed as a man in a black Ninja outfit got her in the back with one of his magic shurikens.

Number 15: Death by Short Fat Italian Plumber.

A few days ago, while walking through a wonderfuly trippy 2D world, full of floating blocks and flying turtles, a short fat Italian plumber bounced of Relena 15's head, squishing her flat.

Number 16: Death by Unbelievably Fat Man.

Relena 16 was a party girl, you know, one of those girls who sits in giant cakes and jumps out to fake gasps of surprise. Anyway, when someone told her she had been invited to the "Meat King" Campbell Sturrock's latest "I'm the fattest guy on earth" party, she became overjoyed, all too happy to climb inside a giant chicken as a surprise. However, she didn't count on Fatty McFat Fat, winner of this year's Mr Fat competition, snatching the giant chicken up to eat it all at once, eating Relena 16 as well as the "lovely, lovely birdie".

Number 17: Death by Creepy Kidsie With Giant Fist.

One day, as Relena 17 was walking through some long grass, she met a little boy, called Alex Kidd. Before she could introduce herself, Alex punched her with an oversized fist, dissolving her in a puff of 2D pixelated smoke.

Number 18: Death by Very Lucky Lady.

Relena 18 was in the Army. Never mind any sexist polocies the army may have, she was in there. After a while, when her superiors got sick of her, they sent her to battle against "Fortune". Needless to say, Relena 18 was quickly blown to bits by Fortune's rail gun.

Number 19: Death by Pants.

As a trainee villain, Relena 19 was often sent up against heroes. However, one day, she met her match in the eternaly popular, immaculately dressed, incredibly witty Mr. Pants, and she was destroyed by his out and out coolness.

Number 20: Death by Transvestite Dinosaur.

Relena 20 was a dreamer, just like Relena 1. one night, instead of dreaming that she was a sausage roll, as usual, she found herself in a strange place called The Land of Subcon, or Cornwall as the locals call it. Relena opened a big red door, and instantly got her head knocked off as a big pink transvestite dinosaur called Ostro spat an egg at her.

Next chapter: Death by Retro Kidsie's TV Show.