Devil May Cry: Scarlet Bullets
Chapter two: My name's not Watson!
Dante was at his apartment, still dumbfounded by Aria's strange announcement.
"Slave?" "Dante shrugged. "Sorry, but BDSM isn't my thing."
"I won't hear any objections!" Aria yelled at Dante. "You're the one I've been looking for this whole time!"
"At least buy me flowers first." Dante joked. "But seriously, I've already heard that today." He remembered Shirayuki's murderous expression. "That's gonna give me nightmares."
"If you don't agree to be my slave…" Aria pointed at her roller bag. "I'll stay here until you agree!"
"Fine, fine." Dante sighed. "Just turn around for a bit, I gotta change."
"F-Fine!" Aria blushed and turned around.
"Works like a charm." Dante smirked as he climbed out the window. "See ya later princess." He thought to himself as he climbed down.
"A-are you done yet?" Aria blushed and turned around, only to see that the window was wide open and that Dante was gone. "Tony, you jerk!" She yelled out in anger. "I'll blow holes through you!"
Dante made his way to the Hotel where Enzo was staying; he entered the building and took the elevator all the way to the top floor.
"Top floor, huh?" Dante sighed. "This is definitely coming out of my pay…" He knocked on the door. "Open up you fat bastard!"
"Dante?" Enzo opened the door. "What are you doing here?"
"I've got a little infestation problem in my place." Dante said as he thought of the angry Aria. "Mind if I crash here?"
"Sure thing, make yourself at home." Enzo opened the door, the hotel room was a two floored penthouse complete with it's own pool, expensive furniture and a wall sized television.
"Funny such a fancy place costs you an arm and a leg." Dante was annoyed at Enzo's big spending. "But it's my arm and my leg!" Dante remembered the attempt on his life earlier.
"Don't sweat it!" Enzo laughed. "When this job is over, we can buy the hotel!"
"Whatever." Dante sat on the couch with his feet up on the table. "Well, since it's your credit card." He smirked. "I'm not holding back on room service."
"That's the spirit!" Enzo laughed. "Live it up!"
"Hello room service?' Dante picked up the phone. "I'd like to order your most expensive pizza and strawberry sundae." He smirked at Enzo. "Gold shavings and all, charge it to Enzo Ferino."
"Woah!" Enzo was frightened. "Don't get carried away!"
"You said live it up, right?" Dante gave Enzo a cocky smile.
Back at Dante's dorm room, Aria was sulking on the couch.
"Stupid Tony…" Aria was very angry at him. "No one escapes me!"
"I heard a noise" A petite green haired girl knocked on the door. "Aria? What are you doing in Mr. Redgrave's room?"
"Reki!"Aria smiled. "Perfect timing!"
"What do you need?" Reki asked.
"Can you track down Tony?" Aria asked happily.
"I'll see what I can do…" Reki answered in a cold tone and she picked up her Dragunov sniper rifle.
Dante and Enzo were both enjoying the room service Dante had ordered.
"So you were attacked this morning?" Enzo asked as he took a slice of pizza.
"Yeah, by a bunch of scooters with Uzi's strapped on them." Dante sighed. "That part was easy, the problem was the girl that "rescued" me."
"Ah, so you met a girl?" Enzo grinned. "Was she a knockout?"
"Only in the sense that she actually knocked me out." Dante was annoyed. "She has the body of a ten year old."
"Finding love in the cradle, huh?" Enzo laughed as he took a bite out of his slice.
"That's not funny you tubby fuck!" Dante snapped.
"What's her name?" Enzo asked curiously.
"It's Aria H. Kanzaki." Dante deadpanned. "The girl that scares me more than any demon."
"I've heard of her, the genius descendant of Sherlock Holmes." Enzo said. "How'd you get someone like that interested in you?"
"By walking under tunnel of ladders, breaking everything in a house of mirrors, spilling the biggest salt shaker and seeing a whole damn group of black cats." Dante shrugged. "Doesn't help that my clingy childhood friend found me on my first day."
"Should've gotten the black fauxhawk." Enzo laughed.
"That's not my style!" Dante laughed as well.
"So you're the current Holmes's new Watson, huh?" Enzo smiled.
"That has got to be the worst nickname you have ever given me…" Dante was very annoyed.
"Just chill out, Watson." Enzo laughed.
"You're lucky this pizza's so good." Dante took a bite out of his slice of pizza. "My name's not Watson!"
"Yeah, well worth it's price tag!" Enzo finished his slice.
"What the?" Dante saw a red dot on Enzo's chest. "Get down!"
"What the hell!?" Enzo got down and covered his head with his hands.
"Did they strap guns onto planes now? Dante took out Ebony.
"There you are Tony!" Aria shot a grappling hook gun from the other building and it broke right through the window of Enzo's hotel room.
"Aria?!" Dante was shocked.
"You're not getting away from me this time!" Aria jumped through the window and into the hotel room.
"Is this her?!" Enzo cowered on the ground.
"Yeah it is." Dante sighed. "How the hell did you find me?" He looked at Aria.
"Reki helped track you down!" Aria was furious at Dante. "You are the most insensitive jerk I have ever met!"
"Yeah, I get that allot." Dante was getting annoyed. "Why the hell are you stalking me like this?!"
"Because I've chosen you as my slave!" Aria exclaimed angrily. "I can't have you running away!"
"Then I'll drive away." Dante deadpanned.
"I won't let you!" Aria grabbed Dante's arm.
"Look, you're not exactly my type." Dante struggled.
"Then what kind of girl is your type?!" Aria blushed angrily.
"Blonde, busty and naughty." Dante joked. "Kinda like that chick from class." He remembered Riko. "I wouldn't mind being her slave." He smirked.
"Y-y-you bastard!" Aria was getting angry and jealous and she shot at Dante.
"Chill!" Dante dodged the bullets. "I was just messin' with ya!"
"You say you'll date me and you even kiss me!" Aria blushed and she kept shooting at Dante. "And you have the nerve to say I'm not your type."
"What the hell did you do?!" Enzo hid under a table, frightened. "Fix this!"
"You don't have to tell me twice." Dante glared at Enzo and held Aria's arms. "Fine I take it back!" He sighed. "One messed up part of me finds you attractive."
"Prove it!" Aria blushed angrily.
"How the hell am I supposed to do that?" Dante was annoyed.
"K-k-kiss me!" Aria blushed and closed her eyes.
"I'll pass." Dante shrugged. "Relationship's aren't my style."
"Relationships are pointless!" Aria looked away. "But as my slave…you have to do as I say!" She blushed.
"Make up your damn mind!" Dante gave Aria a confused and annoyed look.
"Just kiss me already!" Aria held Dante by the collar and she blushed as she puckered her lips. "Or I'll blow holes through you!"
"Wow!" Enzo laughed. "You sure like em' young!"
"Spot the similarities between my fat Italian friend and Swiss cheese in 3…2…1" An annoyed Dante pointed Ebony at Enzo.
"Alright!" Enzo panicked and waved his arms. "I take it back!"
"Fine." Dante sighed. "Close your eyes princess."
"J-just do it already!" Aria blushed and closed her eyes, expecting a kiss.
"See ya at school!" Dante gave Aria a cocky smile. "Trickster!" He "tricked" warping out of the room in a red blur and he appeared in front of the elevator.
"Tony!" Aria opened her eyes to see that Dante was in front of the elevator. "You jerk! She chased after him. "You won't get away from me!"
"Let's finish off our date some other time." Dante gave Aria a cocky smile before the elevator closed.
"Now I have to pay for the repairs!" Enzo yelled as he looked at the wrecked windows and bullet marks.
The next morning at Butei High School, Dante was asleep on his desk and Riko was staring at him with a smile on her lips.
"Good morning Tony!" Riko stood up and walked towards the sleeping Dante.
"So you like it rough eh?" Dante was talking in his sleep. "Suit yourself babe."
"Having a naughty dream?" Riko smirked at Dante and blushed.
"Get over here." Dante grabbed Riko's arm in his sleep.
"Riko is so excited right now." She blushed and smiled playfully and she got closer to Dante.
"Hey!" Aria entered the classroom. "What the hell is going on here?!" She glared jealously at Dante and Riko.
"Huh?" Dante woke up and he saw that he was holding a blushing Riko and that Aria was glaring angrily at him.
"Don't stop now." Riko smiled playfully and wrapped her arms around Dante's neck.
"Maybe next time." Dante smirked at Riko. "The things I do aren't really safe for work."
"You pervert molester!" Aria yelled jealously at Dante. "You kissed me and you're flirting with another girl!"
"Relax." Dante deadpanned. "It's not like we're dating or anything."
"Aww, little Aria's jealous." Riko teased.
"R-relationships are pointless!" Aria blushed angrily.
"So I can have Tony, right?" Riko smiled.
"No!" Aria was enraged. "He's my slave!"
"I'm sure he'd want someone much more attractive than you!" Riko was getting annoyed. "You flat chested midget!"
"I'll blow holes through you!" Aria took out her handguns.
"Hang on, I have a call." Dante picked up his cellphone. "Yo, what's up?"
"Great news Dante." Enzo said excitedly over the phone. "Our client offered to pay for the damages to the hotel if we deal with a demon infestation!"
"Well, I have to get out of this pinch somehow." Dante looked at Aria and Riko arguing over him.
"Great!" Enzo smiled excitedly. "Be there in ten minutes."
"As much as I love a good catfight, I gotta run." Dante climbed out the window. "Adios, babes!" He smirked as he jumped off the window.
At a secret location, Vlad and Gilver were discussing their latest plans.
"Your brother seems to be causing quite the stir at Butei High, he's been failing all my classes." Vlad sighed.
"Dante's always been lazy and unmotivated." Gilver nodded.
"Someone like that is the son of the legendary Sparda?" Vlad asked in a doubtful tone.
"Don't underestimate him, when he's set on something…he becomes quite dangerous." Gilver glared at Vlad.
"You know him far better than I do." Vlad smiled.
"My instincts tell me he's headed for an abandoned building… I'll go test him." Gilver raised his O-Katana.
"Can't you just take his amulet?" Vlad asked.
"It's pointless if he's weak…" Gilver said. "I have to earn it in fair combat."
"That reminds me, I've selected your mission partner." Vlad smiled.
"I already told you, I work alone." Gilver was annoyed at Vlad.
'She's someone you know." Vlad gave Gilver a mocking smile.
"Don't tell me…" Gilver wore a worried and annoyed expression.
"You're a horrible person." Vlad laughed. "Faking your death and leaving your fiancé all alone to mourn you."
"You bastard…" Gilver gripped his O-Katana.
"You're partner is Jeanne d'Arc" Vlad smirked. "Consider this to be extended identity hiding training."
"How bothersome…" Gilver sighed. "I accept your challenge."
After Vlad and Gilver concluded their conversation, a silver haired woman clad in armor, wielding a large sword approached Gilver.
"So you're my partner?" The silver haired woman called out to Gilver.
"Yes…" He turned around. "My name is Gilver."
"I'm Jeanne d'Arc the 30th" She replied coldly.
"Our mission will start soon." Gilver said as he walked towards the door.
"Why are you a member of the IU?" Jeanne asked curiously.
"I want nothing more than power… and they offer me the means to it." Gilver replied. "What's yours?"
"Revenge…" Jeanne's expression darkened. "The IU told me they'd find Vergil's killer if I helped…I'll avenge my fiancé at all costs!"
"Just don't get in my way…" Gilver walked away.
"Vergil…" Jeanne held a small silver necklace with an angelic wing pattern with an emerald close her. "I'll find your killer." She wore a sad and hateful expression.
"This will be a challenge…whatever… as long as I can claim my rightful power." Gilver thought of Dante's amulet. "I will surpass our father."
Dante was running to the location Enzo had given him.
"A chance to get away from that hormonal warzone and some demons to kill" Dante smirked. "Today's a great day!" He suddenly heard a ring on his phone. "I guess I have to check my text messages, phones are such a pain." He checked his inbox only to see that he had over 30 unread messages sent by Shirayuki. "Crap…I'm in trouble."
"Hurry up Dante!" Enzo was driving a cheap rent out car. "Get in."
"Right!" Dante jumped up into the air and landed on the seat. "I'm ready to kill some demons!" He smirked. "Some well deserved stress therapy."
"This is easy money for you!" Enzo laughed.
"Gotta love what you do, right?" Dante smirked.
At the Butei High girl's dormitory, Shirayuki was sending text messages to Dante one after another.
"Answer me Dante!" She yelled out in frustration. "You're not really living with another girl, right?" Her eyes became dull with a murderous expression and a killer aura surrounded her. "I'll punish any cheaters!"
Author's note: Dante's situation with Aria gets much worse and it doesn't help that he's always teasing her! Aria hates relationships but likes Dante and it confuses the hell out of him! Riko's as aggressive as ever and Vlad decides to test Vergil/Gilver. Next chapter Dante faces a group of demons and Gilver!
Now to answer my reviewers,
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Thanks!
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I'm glad you liked it! I'll be sure to keep it action packed and full of Dante's brand of comedy!