Disclaimer: I do not own the characters created by Janet Evanovich. I just really really wish I did!! I am just using them in this story. I only own Carmella, but you can have her if you want her!

Tank moved to cover me, but we were quite a way away from the blast. I saw Carmella get lifted off her feet and thrown backwards by the blast. She scrambled to her feet and dusted dirt off her clothes.

"What the hell was that about?" she screamed. The faint sound of sirens was barely audible in the distance. Amazingly, she still had a firm grip on her shopping bags. Tank ran up to her and made her sit back down.

"Tank I am fine, I swear. I just got knocked on my ass. I am just fine. My shopping is also fine."
"Just don't move until the ambulance gets here. Steph could you call Ran-wait, no need." Tank said and stood as a sleek black Porsche rolled into the lot. Ranger jumped out the car and ran over to us.

"What the hell happened? Carmella are you ok?" He asked as he ran to her side.

"Yeah, I'm fine but Tank won't let me stand up." Carmella moaned. Ranger took her shopping bags and put them in his car.

"It's ok, I saw an ambulance coming." He assured her.

"I don't need a freaking ambulance. I need to get off this gross floor!" She whined. Sure enough, two cop cars whipped into the lot followed by an ambulance. The same paramedics that had dealt with Ranger got out and looked at Carmella.

"You again? What is it with you and car accidents?" one of them asked, grinning.

"It's not my fault and I am fine." Carmella replied, stood up and fell down again.

"Ok kiddo, in the ambulance." The paramedic commanded and helped Carmella in the ambulance.

"Steph needs to get checked out as well. She's pregnant." Ranger informed the paramedic. I glared.

"I am fine. I was stood here and Tank covered me. I do not need to get checked out." I insisted. Then Joe's cop car drove into the lot. He saw me and ran to my side.

"I should have known you'd be involved." He grinned. I rolled my eyes.

"It really wasn't my fault. I wasn't even closest to the car." I said. The paramedic walked up to me.

"Come on, get in the ambulance." He instructed.

"I'm telling you, I'm fi-" I started protesting again, but Joe pushed me gently towards the ambulance.

"Just have a check up, make sure everything's fine. Please" He pleaded. I sighed and got in the ambulance. Carmella was being secured to a stretcher and was swearing at the paramedics in Spanish. Ranger was watching in amusement.

"Come on kid, just put the oxygen mask on" one of the paramedics pleaded.

"¡Puedes besar mi culo, tu gilipollas!" She shouted at him. Ranger laughed.

"What did she say?" I asked him. He grinned.

"I think she said 'kiss my ass you wanker'. That's a rough translation." He replied. I grinned. Carmella really was priceless. The ambulance doors were shut and we sped off to Trenton General Hospital.

I was discharged about half an hour after they confirmed my suspicions; I was perfectly fine. Carmella stormed to meet me a few minutes later.

"It took them thirty minutes to tell me I was perfectly fine. Gilipollas." She muttered. Ranger and Joe were waiting for us in the family waiting area.

"Assholes. They are all complete assholes. Thirty minutes to tell me I was fine. I'd been telling them that the whole time!" She ranted at Ranger. He grinned.

"I still don't think it was fair to call the paramedic a wanker." He said. She grinned.

"Well it's a fact." She laughed.

"Ok, we need to get to the courthouse at around 12.30 at the latest tomorrow. Steph, do you want us to pick you up at around 12.10?" Ranger asked. I nodded.

"Yeah, that sounds good. Will I need to wear a suit?" Ranger nodded. That might be a problem, I wasn't sure my suit would fit over my pregnant belly. I hadn't worn it in about seven months, so it may not have fit over my stomach even if I wasn't pregnant. I climbed into Joe's car and waved goodbye to Ranger and Carmella. Joe was silent as we drove home. We walked into the house and were almost bowled down by Bob. Joe took him for a quick walk, while I heated up the lasagne. What a relationship. I was just dishing it out when Joe and Bob walked back in. We ate in silence for a few minutes before Joe asked.

"What's happening tomorrow?"

"Huh? Oh, I'm going to Carmella's custody hearing." I replied.

"Don't you think you've been spending a little too much time with Carmella and Ranger?" he asked, trying to sound casual but he had a white knuckle grip on his fork.

"No, not really. Ranger is my friend and Carmella's a great kid and she needs me."

"Are you sure she needs you? Or is it just that you want her to need you."

"Joe, the girl is going through hell. I'm just supporting her. I'm sorry if you can't see that." I said coolly and stood to put my plate on the side.

"Well lately you've been spending more time with them then you have at home."

"How would you know? You're hardly ever at home." I muttered.

"What?!" Joe yelled. I turned to look at him. Uh oh, his eye was twitching and the big vein on his forehead was sticking out.

"Well, it's true…um…" I muttered, not really knowing where to go from here.

"You're the one that spends every waking second with Ranger and his stupid daughter. I'm the one that waits for you at home, wondering if you're actually going to come back to me or stay with Ranger!" he shouted. I felt my mouth drop open.

"Why would I stay with Ranger? He's my friend, yeah a close friend but I'm having a child with you." I replied, feeling my throat dry up.

"Yeah, well how can I be sure that the baby is actually mine?" Joe asked. I stared at him in shock and felt tears welling up in my eyes. Joe shut his mouth; apparently realising he'd gone too far. He took a step towards me and held out an arm.

"Steph I'm sorry, I didn't mean-"

"Yes you did. You aren't even sure the baby is yours. Well maybe I'll just go and stay with Ranger and his stupid daughter because at least neither of them question me or doubt me and they both care for me and they trust me." I shouted back and stormed upstairs. I pulled my duffel bag out and threw some clothes in it. This time I was sure I wasn't overreacting. This time my leaving was justified. I walked back downstairs, grabbed my car keys and Rex's cage and walked out the house. I could hear Joe calling me but I just ignored him and kept walking. I loaded Rex into the passenger seat and walked around to the driver's door. Joe ran and held the door to try and keep it from closing.

"Cupcake, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. Please don't go." He begged. I simply glared, kicked him the knee and slammed the door shut while he was off balance. I knew it was predictable, but I drove to Ranger's office building. I hoped that he and Carmella were still living here and hadn't moved into another house. I drove into the underground garage, parked the car and burst into tears. I blame the hormones; they're all out of balance. Stupid hormones. I heard a tap on the car window. I looked up and saw Carmella looking at me. She smiled and opened the door.

"What's up Stephie? She asked kindly and I started sobbing uncontrollably. She crouched down and wrapped and arm around my shoulder.

"Shhh…it's ok. Come on, you can stay here for the night. I'll get one of the guys to come and get your stuff. Stay here." She ran to the other side of the garage and hit the intercom.

"Tank its Carmella. Can you come down here and help Steph with her stuff?"

"Sure thing little one, I'll be there in a minute." Carmella dialled off and ran back to me.

"Come on, out the car." She commanded gently and supported me.

"I'm sorry to be acting like this…" I whimpered. Carmella gave me a hug.

"No worries, I've acted worse. I think you can have Dad's apartment tonight, he won't be back until about five in the morning and I doubt he'll be sleeping then."

"How come you came down here?" I asked, looking at her through bleary eyes.

"I was helping Tank in the control room and we saw you on the surveillance cameras." She explained, indicating the camera's in the garage.

"Helping Tank?" I asked suspiciously.

"Ok, I was spinning around on one of the cars and generally getting in the way." She looked in the car. "Do you only have the hamster and the bag?" she asked, sounding shocked and slightly repulsed. I nodded.

"I packed in a hurry."

"Which leads to the question, why are you here? Not that I'm not glad to see you, I'm just wondering." She asked and grabbed my bag out the car.

"I had an argument with Joe. A really big argument. He said I was spending too much time…away."

"You mean, spending too much time with me and dad." Carmella smiled. I nodded apologetically.

"Yeah, and then I said he was never at home and he went mad and said that he couldn't even be sure the baby was his." I explained. Carmella stared in shock.

"What a fuckwit." She muttered and then looked up at me "Sorry, I know he's your boyfriend or whatever but he is behaving like a prick. Do you want me to have him shot? It wouldn't be a problem, deadly ninja assassins are just a phone call away." She grinned. I raised an eyebrow.

"Ninja?" I asked sceptically.

"Ok, so they're not ninjas, but if you want I could get them to dress up as ninjas."

"Not it's ok. I don't think I want him assassinated." I couldn't help grinning. Tank walked up to us.

"Alright there bomber?" he grinned at me. I smiled weakly back at him. He pulled Rex out the car and shut the door behind him.

"Is this all?" he asked. I nodded and we walked up to the main building.

"I told Stephie she could have Dad's apartment, since he's away for most the night and it'd be more comfortable then the sofa." Carmella explained to Tank who nodded and smiled at me.

"Another argument with Joe?" he asked. I sighed and nodded. "That guy doesn't know how lucky he is to have you." Tank said, sounding slightly angry.

"Thanks." I whispered. We got in the elevator and went up to the seventh floor. Tank put Rex on the kitchen counter patted me lightly on the back, ruffled Carmella's hair and walked out, calling "G'night bombshell." Carmella walked over to the intercom.

"Ella its Carmella, I'm on the seventh floor. Could you do some tea for me and Ms Plum? Something nice and unhealthy. And could you see if we have any Ben and Jerry's left?"

"Certainly Miss Mañoso. However, your father asked me to tell you that if you keep eating all this junk food then you will get fat." Ella's voice answered. Carmella laughed.

"Well then it's a good thing we have a gym in this building. Oh and remind dad that unlike him, we are not all half rabbit." Ella laughed this time.

"I'll be up in about thirty minutes."

"Ok, thank you Ella." Carmella grinned and disconnected. I looked at the wall clock. Seven o clock. Carmella came and sat by me on the sofa.

"Don't worry about Joe. Tank's right, he doesn't know how lucky he is to have you. But you don't have to worry about a thing. Ella is at your beck and call 24 hours a day and you have the merry men to look after you. You're in one of the most secure buildings in Trenton. Though judging its competition, that's not saying much." She smiled and switched the TV on. We watched 'The Simpsons' until the food came. Ella bustled in and smiled at me.

"Hello Ms Plum, it's nice to see you again." She beamed and set up the food. Carmella thanked her and she walked over. We walked over to the table and sat down.

"Oh score, Ben and Jerry's!" Carmella grinned and out the ice cream in the fridge to soften it up. We pulled the covers off our food and I could feel my mouth watering at the sight of the fat fries and the huge cheeseburgers. To balance things out, there was a selection of salad at the side of the plate. The burger was delicious. Carmella grinned when we were finished. I'd left one of the fat French fries on the plate to avoid getting fat.

"You can eat that, you're eating for two." She smiled. I grinned back and ate it happily. I looked at her clean plate.

"Ok, I'm eating for two, what's your excuse?"

"I'm a growing girl. I need my energy."

"If you get any more energetic, you'll explode." I laughed. We cleared up the plates and got the ice cream out the fridge. We settled on the sofa and found 'Bridget Jones' on one of the movie channels. At 11 o clock, we finally decided to call it a night. Carmella gave me a hug goodnight and went down to her apartment. I crawled into bed and fell asleep the second my head hit the pillow.

I woke up a few hours later and had a few seconds of panic and disorientation before I remembered that I was in Ranger's apartment. I looked to the doorway and saw Ranger leaning against the door, smiling slightly.

"Yo" I croaked. He smiled a bit more and walked into the room. "What time is it?" I asked, searching for a clock. He sat on the edge of the bed and started unlacing his boots.

"It's about three in the morning. You need to sleep."

"You're back early and you don't seem all that surprised that I'm here. I was expecting you to threaten to throw me out a window." I stated, sitting up slightly.

"Carmella phoned me to tell me you'd be here. She told me everything." He said. I sighed and leant against the headboard. He put a comforting hand on my leg.

"I'm not here to judge babe; I'm just here to sleep. I'll crash on the couch." He offered and peeled his t-shirt off. "I'm just going to take a shower." He announced and walked into the bathroom. I stayed sat up, wondering if I actually wanted him to sleep on the sofa. He came out about ten minutes later wearing a pair of silk boxers and smelling delicious. He opened the closet to get out some pillows and blankets.

"Don't!" I said suddenly, surprising both Ranger and myself "I mean, you can sleep in the bed as well if you want." I could feel myself blushing. He chuckled and slid under the covers next to me. He wrapped an arm around my and pulled me to him. He dropped a kiss lightly on me shoulder.

"Night babe." He whispered.

"Goodnight Ranger." I replied and fell asleep in his arms, feeling very comfortable.

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I woke up at ten o clock the next morning and rolled out of bed and into the shower. I decided that I was going to buy some of Ranger's shower gel; I didn't care how much it cost. I pulled on a t-shirt and some kick-flare jeans and walked out the bedroom. Carmella and Ranger were sat in the kitchen eating breakfast. Ranger had half a grapefruit, Carmella had a bacon sandwich. When they saw me, they both smiled.

"Morning Sunshine." Carmella grinned and indicated a chair "I ordered you a bacon sandwich. I guessed you'd appreciate more then half a stinking grapefruit." Ranger rolled his eyes but kept smiling.

"I'm telling you Carmella, you'll hit your twenties and you'll inflate like a balloon. You'll have to employ someone to tie your shoes up for you." He said. Carmella stuck her tongue out at him and looked in disgust at the grapefruit.

"You cannot seriously like all that food. I mean granted, some healthy stuff can be nice but most of it I wouldn't even feed to the hamster, it'd be cruelty to animals!" she said. I laughed and took a bite of my sandwich, she was right; it was a lot better then grapefruit. Ranger glanced at the wall clock.

"Ok, you have about an hour and a half to get ready." Carmella squealed and finished off her sandwich.

"An hour and a half? I'll never be ready in time!"

"Don't be stupid, you only need to get changed. Unless you're planning to go in your pyjamas." Ranger said, glancing at her 'Boys are stupid' boxer shorts and top. She sighed.

"Ok, fine." I suddenly had a bad thought.

"I left my suit at Joe's! I completely forgot about it!" I announced.

"Don't worry, I'll drive you there now and we'll get it." Ranger said calmly as he finished his grapefruit.

"I'll come as well in case Joe's there and you need some extra muscle!" Carmella grinned. Ranger muttered something under his breath in Spanish and we all walked out the apartment into the lift.

I started to feel nerves fluttering through me as we approached Joe's house. Carmella was still in her pyjamas and was singing along to the radio. Ranger parked the car and we all got out. Joe's car was in the driveway. Rats. I unlocked the front door and the three of us walked in. Joe jumped up from the couch and then jumped back at the sight of Ranger.

"Cupcake I am so sorry. You know I didn't mean any of the things I said, I was just angry. I never meant-"

"I'm just here to get some clothes Joe." I said coldly and walked upstairs with Ranger following me. Carmella stayed at the bottom of the stairs to stop Joe from coming up. I walked into the bedroom and pulled the wardrobe door open. I handed Ranger a small suitcase and we started throwing clothes in.

"I'm sorry to just impose myself on you." I said to Ranger as we packed.

"It's no problem babe, glad to have you. Besides, Carmella likes having you around. I think she gets a little bummed that Ella's the only other female in the building." He smiled. I could hear talking downstairs.

"Carmella please just get out the way, I need to talk to her."

"Not a chance in hell mate. I am not moving and you can't make me, unless you hit little girls of course." She growled.

"I'm not going to hit you, I just- are those your pyjamas?"

"Well…yeah, but…I…shut up Morelli." I could see Ranger smiling and shaking his head in disbelief. Ranger shut the suitcase and picked it up.

"I can carry it." I insisted. He looked at me.

"No, it's best for you to just take things easy."

"You sound like my mother." I glared. He swatted my on the behind and we walked downstairs. Carmella was stood in the centre of the staircase, preventing anyone from getting past.

"Ok sweetheart, we're ready to go." Ranger told her. She nodded and we walked out the house.

"Stephanie please, I am sorry. Don't just leave; we need to talk about this."

"No, you did all the talking you needed to last night. I need time to think and you need time to calm down and get a hold of your ego." I replied and climbed in the car.

We pulled into the car park and got into the lift up to the fourth floor.

"Ok you two, one hour to get ready and then meet me in the lobby." Ranger instructed as he set my suitcase down in Carmella's apartment. Carmella muttered something about not having nearly enough time and ran into her room. I pulled out my suit and quickly changed into it. I was rolling my stockings on when Carmella came out. She looked extremely sophisticated. Her suit was black (of course) with a white shirt. The jacket of the suit finished just below her hips and the pencil skirt sat just below her knees and had a slit up the side that finished half way up her thigh. She was wearing a pair of very professional shoes and her hair was straightened with a flick at the end. She smiled.

"You look nice." She said. I smiled back.

"You look about 20." I replied. She looked at me critically.

"Do you want me to do something with your hair?" she asked. Now I was suspicious.

"What kind of thing?" I asked. She went back into her room and came out carrying a pair of hair straighteners, a lot of sectioning clips and a canister of shine spray. Half an hour later, I had to admit I looked good. Carmella had straightened my hair and done my make up for me. I was amazed that it had taken only half an hour. It usually took me about two hours to look half this good. I grinned at her.

"You're amazing." I said admiringly. She nodded.

"Yes, that is the general consensus, come on, Dad'll be waiting." We walked out the apartment and into the lift. We stepped out into the lobby. Sure enough, Ranger and Tank were waiting for us. They were both wearing suits and looked extremely sophisticated. They had their backs to the elevator. Carmella cleared her throat and they both spun around. They both stared in surprise.

"Wow." Ranger muttered.

"I agree" Tank said. Carmella laughed

"Doesn't Stephie look amazing? It is all my doing for I am a genius." She announced and struck a pose. Ranger laughed and gave her a hug. He looked me up and down.

"You do look amazing." He commented. I smiled and did a spin and a curtsey. We went down into the garage and got in the BMW. Tank and Ranger sat up front, Tank driving, while me and Carmella sat in the back singing along to the radio. We pulled up outside the courthouse at 12.25. The last time I'd been in court it had been my divorce with Dickie. That was not one of my fondest memories. We walked up the marble stairs into the highly decorated hall. There was a tall man with mocha coloured skin wearing a completely black suit reading some of the notices. He turned as we walked in and walked up to us. He shook Ranger's hand and said something in Spanish. Ranger nodded and replied in Spanish. Carmella frowned and contributed to the conversation. Tank was nodding. I was wishing I understood Spanish. Tank turned to me.

"It's just case details, don't worry you're not missing out on much." He grinned. I nodded and Ranger looked at me.

"Steph this is our lawyer Eddie Sanchez. Eddie this is Ms Plum. She's a close friend of mine."

"Yeah and she's my friend as well." Carmella piped up. Eddie shook my hand.

"Hello Ms Plum, have you met Mr and Mrs Bernards yet?" he asked. I didn't know who he was talking about.

"That's Madre and James. Eddie just call them by their names, Dumb and Dumber." Carmella smiled. Eddie chuckled and slung an arm around Carmella's shoulder.

"You've got a real livewire here Ric." He said to Ranger. Ranger ruffled Carmella's hair.

"Don't I know it."

"Hey, off the hair old man! I spent ages getting it right. Ah man, does anyone have a mirror? I'm going to the ladies." She announced and sashayed across the floor to the ladies bathroom. We were stood, chatting about the case when shouts started coming from the toilets that Carmella had just gone into.

"Just leave me alone you old whore! Te odio, espero que te mueras!" Carmella's voice echoed through the hall. Ranger, Tank and Eddie all gasped and winced.

"I'll give you three guesses who's in there and the first two don't count." Eddie muttered. I was confused again.

"Carmella just told someone in there that she hated them and she wished they would die." Tank explained. I felt my mouth drop in surprise. Someone was shouting back at her in rapid Spanish.
"Yep, that's Eva alright. She always did have a mouth like a sewer." Ranger muttered. Tank was translating for me.

"Eva just said that she didn't deserve a daughter like Carmella, Carmella said she knew and that she was much too good for Eva and that Eva was the worst mother ever. Eva said that Carmella is no better then a hooker, Carmella said that Eva was the equivalent of a hooker." He said. I was shocked.

"This is better then day time TV." Eddie grinned.

"If they hate each other so much then why is Eva fighting for custody?" I asked.

"Either because James is making her or, the more likely option, she's just trying to piss Ric off." Tank said

"Shouldn't we go and stop them?" I suggested. Ranger nodded.

"Yeah we should before one of them drowns the other in a toilet." He murmured and we ran across the hall into the toilets. We burst in and saw Carmella shrieking at another woman, presumably Eva. They both spun to face us. I could see the resemblance. Carmella was just a very pretty version of Eva. Eva hadn't aged well. She had lines around her eyes and bags underneath them, but the eyes themselves were blazing with anger.

"Dad, this is the ladies bathroom." Carmella whispered.

"Yes I know, but we can hear you two having your screaming match all the way across the hall."

"Hello Ricardo. I'd say it's good to see you but I don't lie."

"You don't? That's a shock, when did you give that up?" Carmella hissed.

"Eva, good to see you're as vindictive as ever." Ranger growled. Eva smiled maliciously and then looked at me.

"Who's this then? Is she your new bit of skirt Ricardo? I'd get out while you still can girl." She stared at me

"Y'know Madre, there are some women who are worth making an effort for, like Steph. Others, such as you, are not worth the dust on the soles of a tramps foot." Carmella returned the malicious smile.

"Laugh while you still can my dear, but we will win custody and when we do you'll be off to military school in order to straighten out your blatant attitude problem and problem with people who are superior to you." Eva hissed.

"When you say people who are superior to me are you talking about yourself? Because I don't treat you the way I do because of my attitude problem as you put it, I act that way because I know that I am superior to you. See I'd never take my daughter's boyfriend, who happened to be half my age, and marry him because I am not a filthy, sleazy, common little slut unlike you." Carmella smiled sweetly.

"You won't be smiling when you're sleeping under canvas in winter at military school my dear, so enjoy your false sense of superiority while it lasts."

"You're sadly disillusioned Madre, you know damn well that 1, you won't gain custody and 2, I could easily get away from you if you did."

"I don't think even you could escape from a military school Carmella. You may be good but you are not that good. This is you trying to copy your father and trust me sweetness, your father is not someone that you want to copy." Eva glared at Ranger whose eyes were turning darker by the second, I couldn't remember ever seeing him this angry.

"Because you're such a perfect role model Eva. You drink, you did drugs, you sleep around, your steal your daughter's boyfriend. I hardly think that makes you a decent mother. That just makes a waste of space." Ranger hissed. Eva looked furious.

"Madre, why don't you do us all a favour and vete a tomar por culo!" Carmella said calmly. Eva looked like she was about to hit her.

"How dare you tell me to fuck off you little slag, she's got this off of you Ricardo, you and your little band of whores and followers." She said, looking from Ranger, to me, and back to Ranger.

"Excuse me? Who are you calling a whore?" I asked, but was ignored by the full scale rant that was going on.

"Eva if she's got it from anyone then it'll have been you or your pre-kindergarten boyfriend, not me." Ranger replied.

"Yeah, and Ranger hardly ever swears." I piped up. Ranger smiled at me and winked.

"Ranger? So you're still using your super-cool nickname then?" Eva asked.

"Look you common tart, we, unlike you, have class and so we are going to go now and leave you alone, like so many others have done. We'll see you in the hearing and I can assure you that when we win, we will crucify your dumb husband." Carmella hissed and walked out with me and Ranger following.

Tank and Eddie were stood where we had left them. As we walked up to them, Tank smiled grimly.

"I take it that was round one." He stated. Ranger nodded.

"That was awful, I couldn't imagine talking to my mom like that!" I exclaimed. Carmella looked at me.

"You thought that was bad? The worst is yet to come."

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Thanks for all the reviews, I really appreciate them! I hope you enjoyed this instalment and please review! Sorry to any serious 'cupcake' fans, but I'm still working on the storyline so it could all change! Arigato!