Chapter 19: To Walk Beside Me
Envy ran a hand through the short brown hair of his disguise, and stared across the room at the hole Sloth had created. Teams of workers poured cement onto the grated surface, closing it up. What a nightmare. Sloth was not supposed to dig up, he was meant to dig forward. Idiot. Well, at least this mistake bought the humans more time.
"Lt. Colonel," Miles said next to him. "Let me show you to the development sector of the Fort."
Envy wondered why he was suddenly being dragged away, until he saw General Armstrong leading General Raven from the elevator. He resisted the temptation to grin. The reason Father had left Briggs Fort for the end was because of her. Envy knew that much. The homunculi were not stupid. They knew from the very beginning who would be easily swayed and who would need cutting down. Armstrong was neither. Too strong to be convinced to run with their plan. Too stubborn to die. Whatever plans Raven was given by Wrath would fail. And judging from the smug grin on his face, Envy figured he had managed to talk to Armstrong about being a 'chosen one.' Idiot. Armstrong was playing him like a fool.
Envy nodded to them as Miles led him past and into the elevator. The doors slid closed, and a silence lingered. Envy chanced a glance at him; mocha skin, pale hair, sunglasses hid his eyes. He ran the name over in his head. Tried to remember if there was anything in the military files about a Major Miles that he could use. It bothered him that he could not remember any details about him.
He looked over at Miles again. Mocha skin, sunglasses… And then it hit him: Ishvalan members on his father's side. The information from the file flooded into his memory as if he had broken off a rusted water spout. The information flowed like water in a tight stream; fast, precise, pressurized.
"Major Miles, if I recall correctly, your grandfather was from Ishval." Envy watched his expression change. His eyebrows rose over the rim of his sunglasses, lips thinned. "Isn't that right?"
Ding. The elevator doors slid open, and Miles led him out onto a steel catwalk above a large room. Envy looked down on the tanks, the missiles, the boxes of explosives, and thought for a moment Miles would not answer his question.
"What's your point?" Miles stopped before the railing, and stared at Envy. Even though Envy could not see his eyes behind the dark lenses, he imagined them narrowing on him.
"I want to know what it's like to turn your back on your own kind." At Envy's comment, Miles' hands balled into fists. He watched him, wondering if he would come up with an answer. Memories of his past, two-hundred years of it, rise up in his mind. They swirl like oil on water in no particular order: Lust's sly grin; Gluttony sucking on his thumb; the flash of malice in Greed's violet eyes; Father's steady golden stare. Pieces Envy knew he would never get back. Tiny fragments of a pointless life. And he realized he missed it, just slightly. The feeling was so fragile he knew if he lingered on it, it would shatter.
"There are no sides to choose, Colonel," Miles replied. "There are only individuals, and how we each choose to view each other. I remained in the military even during the Ishvalan Rebellion, because I hope that my actions will change how the rest of the world sees my Ishvalan brothers and sisters. I am like a pebble tossed into an ocean of Amestris. One day, the ripples I create will become waves."
Envy thought he was a little naïve. "And what about your perception of Amestrians, Major? Don't you hate them for slaughtering your people?"
"My closest friends here in Briggs are Amestrian," Miles replied, calmly. "And regardless of our blood or ancestry, we would die to protect each other. So, no, Colonel, I do not hate Amestrians."
Envy leaned forward and wrapped his fingers around the metal railing. It was warm to the touch. So, humans are the same regardless of race. Even without the tie of blood, they stand next to each other, protecting each other. He felt a strange kinship with Miles. Like him, he had turned on his brethren, the homunculi and Father, and made peace with those who were originally considered his enemy.
"You know, if it hadn't of been for the Fullmetal Alchemist, you would have been the first to be upfront with me," Miles said. "When people discover I'm Ishvalan, they are quick to pity me."
"Let's just say I share a similar outlook," Envy replied, "and it's not in my nature to pity."
The corners of Miles' mouth turned up in a small smile. He looked like he was about to say something before the elevator doors slid open and an officer ran out of it. "Major Miles, sir!"
Miles and Envy turned to him. "Yes, what is it?"
"It's General Raven, sir. It appears he's missing!"
Envy's eyes narrowed. So, the humans acted faster than he anticipated. Father was right about General Armstrong. She was not one to be underestimated. He wondered how much Raven managed to tell her before she killed him. And then, he remembered the Elrics.
"Take me to where you're keeping Fullmetal, Major," Envy ordered.
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Roy Mustang pinched the note between his fingers as he left Gracia's apartment. Send my regards to the Colonel as well. He knew Envy had been the one to send the message with the flowers, but why?
A chilly wind pulled at the tail of his long coat as he crossed the street and got into a parked car. Hawkeye sat patiently in behind the wheel. She looked over at him when he closed the door.
"How was tea?" she asked.
Mustang passed the note to her, and frowned. "The bastard is mocking me. He knows I'm in no position to kill him now, even if I want to. He knows that, so now he's rubbing it in my face."
Hawkeye unfolded the paper and read the note silently. He waited for her response to it, some form of confirmation. If she could give him even a single nod, it would let him remember his hatred, remember that regardless of his deal with Envy, the homunculus would still die by his hand. But Hawkeye only stuffed the note into her pocket, and said:
"The rest of the letter was washed away by water. I wonder what he would have been trying to tell you and Gracia. An admission of guilt?"
"Not his style." Mustang glanced over at her.
"You said Edward trusts him," Hawkeye said. Her hands were on the wheel, but she did not turn the keys to start the car.
"Fullmetal doesn't trust him, but he's in no position to deny Envy's help," Mustang replied. "And Envy knows that. I suspect that's why he hasn't told us everything about what the homunculi are planning. He knows that once all his secrets are spent, he's as good as dead. I won't hesitate to incinerate him."
"Did he say why he's helping us?" Hawkeye asked, making Mustang look over at her with a raised eyebrow.
"No."
Hawkeye's gaze narrowed. "Then, we can't trust him, Colonel. Remember that this is Envy, the manipulating homunculus. It could be a trap."
"If it's a trap, then it's a good one." Mustang frowned. "Fullmetal doesn't get caught up in webs that easily."
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Fort Briggs. Regardless of her thick wool gloves, the depth of her pockets, the heated air blowing into the mechanics workshop, Winry could not shake the cold from her bones. She shivered and tightened the scarf around her collarbone. Why had she been brought here? When she had opened the front door to officers in blue uniforms, she thought she might be getting arrested. Detained. That had been the word they had used.
She sunk into a chair at the side of the room and waited. Waited for something, someone. Anything. If she was here under arrest, why would they leave her alone in an automail workshop? Nobody had been by to question her. She was not cuffed to a chair like she had been in Central. She thought if she tried the door, it might be unlocked, and she would be able to wander freely through the Fort. Perhaps the arrest was simply an excuse to get her to come North. But why?
Her mind drifted to Envy, his sharp violet eyes, the way the corners of his mouth twisted up in a grin, slanted and wide. She wondered if he had anything to do with her sudden road trip. Or if he was the reason the military was suddenly interested in her.
Envy. He had gone to Central with Edward and Al, and Winry had not heard from any of them in at least a week now. There was a tight twisting of anxiety in her chest. What if something went wrong? What if Envy had been caught by the other homunculi?
Winry knew he had been nervous to go back to Central. He risked being discovered. It felt like a fist had tightened around her heart. Just the thought of Envy in the hands of his Father...
It was strange. She thought after all those years that she might fall for Edward. Yet, here she was. Falling for someone who wasn't even human.
Fallen. The word rose in her mind. She corrected herself almost immediately, automatically. And paused. Stopped to catch herself. It was strange. Strange how, despite the literal meaning of the word, she did not feel the sharp tinge of panic, the sudden rise of her heart into her throat, the anxious tightening of her chest. Thinking of Envy made warmth return to her bones, let her settle more comfortably into the layers of wool clothing. Her numb toes started to tingle as the feeling came back.
Winry let her mind wander. When all the troubles in Amestris were settled, what would life be like? What would the aftermath be? Would Envy linger? She imaged him sitting on the green hillside back home, looking out over the valley, watching the railroad snake its way through the land. It would be the beginning of summer. Warm breezes would brush against her skin. New scents would bring old memories: thyme, basil, chopped cedar. Sweet and spicy. Would Envy turn and glance over his shoulder when he hears her? She wondered absently: did he know how to dance?
She did not feel shy about thinking of his hands. What they might feel like. She felt Envy's wiry strength before. Remembered how his arms felt around her waist, how his skin felt against hers. The warmth there. Most of all she remembered the feeling of safety. Something she had not felt since her parents had been alive. Complete contentment. The security of it. Of all people, Envy made her feel that way.
Winry picked at a chip in the armrest of the chair, and stared across the room. Even after finding out what Envy had done. Murdering Maes Hughes. Pulling the trigger to start the War in Ishval. She hated it. Hated how she had fallen for someone, regardless of the bad. Hated how she was trying to justify it all in her mind, make Envy easier to love. Hated herself for it. But could not help it. When she remembered being held in his arms, she was able to forget the bad. If only for a moment. Did it make her as bad as him?
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Edward and Alphonse stared at Envy through the bars of their cell. Envy ran a hand through his short brown hair, and ordered one of the Brigg's guards to let him speak to Edward alone. They were escorted to a private room, where Edward's metal arm was cuffed to the chair. Envy was sharply reminded of the interrogation room Winry had been kept in weeks before.
Once the guard left them, Envy turned to Edward, and said, "I'm Lt. Colonel Frank Archer, military specialist -"
"What's a military specialist doing here?" Edward asked, eyes narrowing. "Did the Fuhrer send you?"
"My orders are none of your concern." Envy sat down across from him and folded his hands on the table top. "I'm told you may know where I can find Scar."
Edward blinked, and Envy had expected this reaction. He resisted the temptation to smirk. Knew it would give him away. He continued, "Apparently Scar has been seen travelling with a Xingese girl with a black and white cat. I would like to question her."
Edward's eyes widened, only slightly. Envy knew he would be after the girl for her talent in Alkahestry, especially after Father's display of alchemy. Now that the Elric brothers knew where the power fuelling their alchemy came from, they would be searching for an alternative to get their bodies back.
"I've been kept in the cell here for the past few days. Is the military really that desperate?" Edward asked. Envy frowned. Not because Fullmetal was being unhelpful, but because he had expected the runt to catch onto his ploy by now. Envy knew Briggs well enough to know they were being watched even in this 'private' room. He did not want to blow his cover, especially after seeing Sloth frozen at the front door.
He decided to try a different tactic. "Then, perhaps you can tell me what you know about a group of suspected oddballs called the homunculi?"
At this, Edward looked up in surprise. Golden eyes widening on Envy. "So, you weren't sent here by the Fuhrer?"
Careful, runt. Envy knew if he had been anyone else from Central a comment like that would have landed Edward in prison. The implication of his question: the Fuhrer in league with the homunculi. To those in Central Headquarters trying to hide the truth, Edward was a threat.
Envy leaned back in the steel chair. Felt one of the rungs dig into his spine uncomfortably. He pushed it from his mind, and replied, "By that question, I can assume you know something."
Edward must have realized his mistake, because he dropped his gaze to the table and frowned. He did not look like he was going to say anything more, and Envy was getting frustrated with Edward. Of all the times to be thick-skulled...
"Okay, let me ask you this one," Envy persisted. "I hear the Flame Alchemist might be in league with one."
Edward's gaze rose to meet Envy's blue stare. Envy continued, "The shape-shifter. He sent a letter to the Colonel."
Envy still was not sure if Edward understood he was trying to let him know who he was without anyone else finding out. Before he could wonder too long, Edward tapped the table with his index finger. Tap, tap, pause, tap.
"Now that you mention it," Edward said. "I do remember hearing about a rogue homunculus. So, do you know what the letter said?"
Envy nodded, and closed his eyes. "It said: I remember October the 3rd, 1911, too."
Edward stared. Envy waited. He remembered the day the Elrics burned their house to the ground. Remembered watching Winry cry, tears glistening in the firelight. Remembered Edward turning his back on everything. Remembered how Alphonse waited until the early morning, when the coals were finally doused by a thin rain. Envy knew Edward carried that date close to his heart. It would be the only way to him to get through to Edward: I've been there when you were most vulnerable. Seen you when you were scraping rock bottom. Witnessed your failure, your shame, your denial.
It was not a threat. It was a plea. Envy needed Edward to trust him like Winry had. Time was running out, and Mustang's promise hung over his head. It was the only reason Envy had not told Edward everything. He needed to know his safety was secure. Thought that if he gained Edward's trust, Fullmetal might be able to persuade Mustang to back down.
Edward sighed. "I think you can drop the act, Envy."
Envy frowned.
Suddenly, the door flew open and the woman knew only by name entered the room with her hand on the hilt of her sword. Her blue eyes narrowed on Envy, lips thinning. Envy stood up, but did not risk transforming into his usual form. General Armstrong.
"So you are the shape-shifter called Envy. The homunculus in league with this brat," she said, pointing a finger at Envy. Edward's jaw tensed at being called 'brat'. "I have questions, and you will answer all of them."
Envy smirked and put a hand on his hip. "So you killed General Raven, huh? Are you sure that was a smart idea?"
Armstrong raised her eyebrow, and Edward's eyes widened. "You murdered him?" he blanched.
Armstrong ignored him and regarded Envy with a narrowed gaze. "I see you're sharper than the other homunculus we fought. But, I'm the only one here that will be asking the questions, homunculus. Now, tell me: what does the Fuhrer have planned for Briggs?"
Envy frowned, and looked over at Edward, wondering how much he had already told her. But Edward simply stared at him, waiting.
"The last blood crest needs to be made here for the circle to be complete. I saw Sloth frozen outside, so at least the tunnel can't be finished. As long as we can keep the tunnel from being dug, Father's plan will not be completed," Envy explained, but he watched Armstrong's expression change. Her eyes widened slightly. Her hand tightened its hold on the hilt of her sword.
"The big homunculus is back in the tunnel," she said with a hint of regret. "General Raven gave the orders before I could silence him."
Silence him. Envy grinned at those words. He liked the woman General. She had the nerve most humans did not. He would not be surprised if she was also a homunculus, the way she talked about another human's death. The insensitivity in her voice made him remember how he used to be, before he knew what guilt felt like.
"General Raven's death will draw attention from Central," Envy said. "Wrath will send someone to take your place, and you will probably be sent to answer to the Fuhrer directly."
Armstrong took a threatening step forward, fist shaking at her side, other hand tight around her sword hilt. "Then let them come! Briggs will be fine without me."
"But we have to prevent conflict from starting here," Edward said. "If the blood crest is made and the tunnel is finished, that creep's plan will be realized."
"Not if I can help it," Envy growled. He had seen Xerxes fall, helped clean up the mess the massive transmutation left behind. Almost two-hundred years ago and he remembered every detail. He wished sometimes homunculi memories faded like human ones did. The tight pitch of screams. The sudden silence after. Jarring, chilling, eerie.
He thought of Winry in that moment. Knew that if he did not help stop Father that she would become just another memory, another chapter in his eternal story. He could not let that happen. He had made a promise to himself: he would protect her. That's what guardians did.
A red flash of light surrounded Envy as he transformed back into his usual form. Armstrong took a small step back, but Edward simply watched. Afterward, Envy smirked at Armstrong's stunned expression.
"We'll have to track down Scar and that Alkahestry girl," Edward said. "They can help us. Maybe they can teach Al and I alkahestry so that that Father guy can't stop out alchemy again."
Armstrong nodded. "I'll permit you and your brother to leave the Fort to search under the condition you will bring the girl to me in the end. This alkahestry sounds like it could be a useful tool to learn."
"Wait," Envy turned to Edward in surprise. "Aren't you and Scar enemies? He killed Winry's parents remember? You can't seriously tell me you're forgiving him that easily. If you don't kill him, I will."
Edward frowned at him. "You're one to talk, Envy. And I'm not forgiving him. Far from it. But if we're going to defeat the homunculi we're going to have to work together. I see that now."
"Enough with the chit chat. Fullmetal, I suggest you leave with your brother if you want to search for Scar, but I want keep the homunculus here," Armstrong said.
Envy rounded on her. "I have a name!"
"I don't care," Armstrong snapped. "From this point on, you're working for me!"
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Winry looked up when the door to the workshop opened, and her breath caught when she saw Envy following Edward into the room. Edward's eyes widened when he saw her, and before Winry could say a word, Envy said:
"See, no harm done. If she'd have stayed in Resembool, Wrath would have taken her hostage by now."
"Envy? Ed?" Winry looked between them, felt a weight lift from her shoulders. "What's going on?"
She ran over to them, teetered on the balls of her feet as they came to a stop in front of her. Envy crossed his arms and glanced over at Edward, who asked, "Winry, are you okay? The officers who arrested you... they didn't tell you why, did they?"
Winry shook her head. "No, they said I was being detained, but they wouldn't tell me what for. And then I was brought here."
"I brought you here," Envy said, suddenly. "Sorry for the deception, but General Raven was watching you closely."
Winry blinked. "Envy? You mean, you were disguised as Mr. Archer? That was you?"
Envy nodded, but before he could reply with words, Winry backhanded him across the face. His cheek stung. He could feel the tender skin start to blotch red. When he turned back to face her, her lips were thin with anger and her hands were in fists. He tried to push down his own fury, tried to tame it.
"You could have at least said something to me," Winry said. "And all those things you said about my parents! How dare you!"
"Winry!" Edward stepped between them, and Envy balled his fists. He wanted to push the little brat away, and it was the first time he had ever felt angry at Winry since he had switched out his philosopher stone. It made him pause for a moment. Long enough for Edward to continue, "Al and I have to leave the Fort to do something, but Envy's going to stay here."
Envy half expected Winry to refuse to stay with him at the Fort, but she did not. Edward turned to him, and said, "If our theory is right, things are about to get dangerous here. I'm trusting you too protect Winry."
Winry stared at Edward. Mingled surprise and touch of fear lay behind her eyes. Envy knew she wanted answers to questions unspoken. And the fact that Edward was willing to leave her in hands of a known former enemy was proof that things were desperate.
"It's time." Major Miles stood in the doorway ready to escort Edward out of the Fort. Envy heard Edward give Winry some short words of assurance before letting himself be led away. When the door closed behind them, Envy was sharply aware of the silence that lingered between Winry and himself.
Winry stared at Envy. Watched the tips of his dark hair brush over his shoulders as he turned back to face her. She could feel his eyes on her, but could not bring herself to meet them. The anger she had felt a moment ago had vanished. In its place a slow, sinking sadness pooled like molasses. Sticky, heavy. Something was not right in the way Envy regarded her. When she finally looked up into his violet eyes, they were guarded. They reminded her of how he used to look. Inquisitive, yet manic. She could tell he was worried about something.
"Talk to me," she said. She wanted him to open up to her. Felt that even after all they had been through, Envy still held back. That he still kept secrets; his demons locked away. In a way, it was not fair. He knew everything about her, and she still had much to learn about him.
After his comments about her parents, she felt betrayed. But then she realized: it might have been the only way Envy was comfortable talking about Ishval. She realized, even though she knew how he had started the war, he never really talked about his term there. Never mentioned his past in any way.
"About what?" Envy asked, raising an eyebrow. Winry held out her hand to him. His fingertips brushed the center of her palm briefly. His skin was warm. She was surprised when he took her hand in his, did not expect him to do something so human.
"Let's walk," Winry said, "and you can tell me stories, anything as long as there's no alchemy involved."
Envy snickered. "Stories? What are you? Three?"
Winry wondered if he realized he was leading her out of the room, into the hallway. Walking slow. She wondered if he knew how significant a simple gesture, holding her hand, was to her. She noticed he walked not a couple paces in front or behind, but beside her. He matched her stride, stepped slowly with her. There were people in the hallway, moving around them, but Winry did not care. She wanted to savour this moment. Tomorrow the nightmares they have been running from might eventually catch up.
