A/n: Here ya go, the long awaited (at least I hope) chapter 19, where the shit hits the fan! Woo hoo! Warning: Major angst ahead! Also some asyah and Snape bonding, father to daughter. Yay!
Broken Wings
Chapter 19: Unraveled Secrets
By: Midnight Walker
Draco sat down on his bed in the Slytherins' boys' dorm. It had been so long…so long since he held her in his arms. It was his entire fault…he broke her heart although she never let anyone see. She was screaming inside yet outside she was as cold as ever…when he looked into her cold honey eyes, he shivered. She walked the corridors alone, no friends, and her eyes straight ahead. She never talked to him, not even if they were partnered together in potions or transfiguration.
Sometimes he grew angry at her for not forgiving him, but then remembered that he was the cause of all this. Had he not given into his desire and became a player in autumn's game, he would have his love in his arms right now. Her lips upon his…he never felt so alone before…like someone had taken all the joy out of his life and replaced it with misery.
Hell, he disserved it. He was such an idiot. He ran away the only person whom he could ever love. Draco stood and walked over to the window that was made to show the outside even though they were in the dungeons. It was snowing. Christmas had come and gone neither speaking a word to each other. She had stayed here, while he went home at his father's request.
It was now the middle of January and it snowed constantly; almost reflecting his inner turmoil. Today was Sunday and there was nothing to do but reflect and wish for better days.
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Harry sat on his bed in Gryffindor tower reflecting as well. He missed Ron terribly; Harry considered Ron his brother. His death was like digging a knife deep into his heart and twisting it every so often. He had made a vow that on the day of his friend's funeral, two and a half months back, that he would find the person responsible for his brother's death. Losing Ron made him feel regret for his actions toward Hermione now known as asyah. He missed her and felt so bad for treating her like she was in disposable and she would not care how they treated her. Harry and Ron treated Hermione like second best; never really caring for her opinions or her friendship.
Now when he needed her more than ever and she was not here. How many times had she needed them and they weren't there for her? Probably more than he can count. He felt so bad and disgusted with himself. When she began to spiral out of control he never noticed or offered to help. It began in fourth year; he noticed over the summer she was distant and sometimes snappish, but thought nothing of it. She was a girl and girls were hard to understand. He figured it was just was one of "those" days.
He was so stupid! Now she had changed her name, a vampire, most likely a death eater, and dating Draco Malfoy. Hell she had even changed her house! He needed to find her and apologize to her, right his wrongs, tie up lose ends and maybe, just maybe he could bring her back to the light.
Harry stood from the bed and a small smile graced his pale face for the first time in a long time. Yes, he would talk to her. Now matter how many how she yelled and protested he would hear her out and see what happened to the innocent girl he once knew.
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Asyah sat in an unused classroom looking out the window. The white, pristine snow was the only source of light in the dark classroom. She sat reflecting on her sad, miserable life. If she could kill herself she would have already. Damn her immortal life! How she wanted to die, just to sink into the black abyss of death…but her vampiric side would not permit it.
Her life had gone from happiness to miserable to happiness and back to miserable again. How fate like to play with her. Her thoughts went to Draco; her love. She still loved him even though he had hurt her. But something inside would not forgive him, even though she wanted to so badly and put all this behind her like a bad dream.
Just then she picked up hurried footsteps and panting. She turned her head back to the window thinking the footsteps would pass her by. She was so far into her depression that she didn't care if moldy wart walked in here and killed her, not like that was possible. The door slammed open and stood there was the last person she expected to see; Harry.
She could not face him now…not after what she did. Asyah suddenly felt everything she ever said and did rush back at her and crush her heart. She felt so lost. Harry walked toward her a stopped in front of her, his green eyes seemed to be drowning in sorrow. Her heart clenched.
"I wanted to apologize to you, asyah," he said with difficulty. He breathed deeply, his resolve was cracking. "Me and Ron treated you so badly these last few years and it had taken losing my two best friends to realize that and I am sorry." He said looking down at the dusty floor. 'Sorry? Sorry!' she shrieked in her mind.
"That won't cover everything." She said coldly.
"I know. But Hermione-I mean asyah- please tell me whatever we did, I couldn't have hurt you this bad to make you turn into this." He said gesturing to her. Asyah turned her head letting her black hair fall across her face, and hide the pain in her eyes. Should she tell him? Did she dare tell him the deepest secret she had that she didn't tell Draco? Her heart seemed to think it was time to reveal a secret so old it was gathering dust.
"Harry there are many things you do not know about me," she began feeling an onslaught of tears threatening to come. "My mother died when I was four, I don't remember her at all. My father he- he," she broke down unable to continue. He walked forward and embraced her but she pushed him away, shaking her head. "I was abused since I was four Harry. Abused and raped. It's a wonder how I've come to love and trust another human being." She said tears flowing freely. She laughed a laugh that was laced with sorrow. "It was all a façade. I hid my pain and my bruises from you and everyone. I buried my head in books because they made me forget about what awaited me at home." She slid down the old cracked wall; pieces of plaster fell into her hair and on her black sweater.
"Im so sick of all the hurt and pain, Harry. I just want it all to go away. When I was bit by a vampire it just made things worse. I hated myself and I still do. Then you and Ron hated me too, I couldn't bear it any longer. Then Draco came and made everything right again, he made me happy. I felt loved and I liked the feeling of cared for. Then he broke my heart, but I still love him. Gods I love him; I can never let him go, not even if I tried with all my might. I will always remember how good he was to me…" she trailed off again and Harry opened his mouth to speak but she silenced him by raising her hand.
"No, don't speak; I need to get this all out now. No more secrets." She took a deep breath. "There is a prophecy about me Harry." His mouth hung open. "Yep, but prophecy is just as crushing. I am to bear the dark lord's heir. I am to be his queen and we are to rule the world with my powers." Her lungs seemed to lose air, and she couldn't breathe. When she had regained control, she began again.
"Also I am a death eater, Harry and so is Draco. But that is not my deepest secret. While I continuously fight this evil inside me, that threatens to take over, I let it win. And one night it proved to me just how fatal and ruthless I can be. One day Draco and I were in the library and we were talking about how to conceal of death eater from everyone and Ron was hiding behind a book case. He heard everything. He threatened to tell and we could not afford to have out cover blown, or we would be killed. I let my hate take over and the darkness fill me. I could see myself as I tortured Ron and then finally killing him. It was after it was all said and done did I truly realize what I allowed myself to do." Asyah then let the tears go without any restrictions.
They fell relentlessly, droplets falling to the dusty floor. Her sobs racked her body and her shoulders shook, as she rocked herself. In every tear she cried held a memory; whether it was bad or good, it poured out of her. Her soul was healing and she needed to start anew.
A fresh start is exactly what she needed. As her sobs started to cease, she became aware that Harry was still standing above her. She looked up into his green eyes expecting to see anger or sadness or both, but there was nothing. Asyah slowly stood and walked past him. She had her hand on the door, when his voice rang out.
"I forgive you Hermione." He said. Asyah smiled for the first time in a long time. A true pure smile that was untainted by the evils that once plagued her heart for so long.
Once
upon a time there was a girl
In her early years she had to learn
How to grow up living in a war that she called home
Never
know just where to turn for shelter from the storm
Hurt me to see
the pain across my mother's face
Everytime my father's fist would
put her in her place
Hearing all the yelling I would cry up in my
room
Hoping it would be over soon
Bruises fade father,
but the pain remains the same
And I still remember how you kept
me so afraid
Strength is my mother for all the love she gave
Every morning that I wake I look back to yesterday
And I'm OK
I often wonder why I carry all this guilt
When it's you
that helped me put up all these walls I've built
Shadows stir at
night through a crack in the door
The echo of a broken child
screaming "please no more"
Daddy, don't you understand
the damage you have done
To you it's just a memory, but for me it
still lives on
Bruises fade father, but the pain remains the
same
And I still remember how you kept me so, so afraid
Strength
is my mother for all the love she gave
Every morning that I wake
I look back to yesterday
It's not so easy to forget
All
the marks you left along her neck
When I was thrown against cold
stairs
And every day I'm afraid to come home
In fear of what
I might see there
Bruises fade father but the pain remains
the same
And I still remember how you kept me so afraid
Strength
is my mother for all the love you gave
Every morning that I wake
I look back to yesterday
And I'm OK
I'm
OK
Asyah turned and said, "Thank you." before leaving. She smiled as she left, thinking 'Things are beginning to turn around.' She walked down from the fifth floor to the dungeons to see a certain potions professor. A few things needed to be out in the open. She reached her said destination and knocked. Hearing the deep baritone that made her feel safe and secure, she opened the door and ran into his arms even though they weren't open to receive her.
He had been standing with his back to the door, and had turned around to see who entered only to have someone jump into his arms. He looked down at the long black hair and gothic clothes and knew it was asyah. He hugged as well feeling her shoulders shake; he knew she was crying. Why he did not know, he would have to wait to find out. He led her over to his desk where he sat down in a chair, asyah on his lap.
After she finished crying she proceeded to talk, telling him everything she had told Harry. After she was done, he was speechless. To know her father beat her and raped her upset him, and he found his grip tightening around the thin girl that currently sat on his lap. She had been through so much and all he wanted to was protect her.
"You hate me don't you?" he soft reached his ears. He understood everything he said mattered deeply to her.
"I could never hate you. I love you asyah, I love you like you were my own daughter. You are too young to have been through so much pain, and all I want to do is rid you of that pain, but I can't. The best thing I can do is to stay by your side through thick and thin…" he trailed off feeling her shift against him, so she could see his face.
"Do you really mean that?" she said her eyes sparkle ling with unshed tears. He nodded his head a true smile coming upon his face, the first in many years. She smiled widely. "Then in that case I love you too dad." She said hugging him tightly. His eyes were a wide as saucers. Did she just call him dad?
"Asyah I don't deserve the title of dad." He said to her. She had her face buried in his neck so her voice was muffled.
"I don't care. You are my father and I will cal you are such. What am I supposed to call you Severus?" she said sarcastically. He chuckled lightly. He supposed she could get away with calling him dad. But he promised to himself he would not fail at being a father like his father did. Father and daughter sat there for who knows how long before she sat up and looked in his eyes. "I have to go. I have some unfinished business with a certain blonde haired Slytherin." She said a small smile appearing on her pale face. He smiled at her, letting her get up from his lap. He knew what she was going to do, and he encouraged her. Draco was the only one who ever saw made her so happy and he wanted her to be happy. He shooed her out of his office and she walked down the stone hallway to the Slytherin common room.
He also had business to take care of that required him to go to the ministry of magic and pay a visit to asyah's father…
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Draco was still sitting in the same spot he was earlier; he rarely left this spot except to bathe, feed, and sometimes to sleep. He heard the door open and thought it was Blaise or some other boy in his dorm. The person stood right in front of him. He opened his eyes and saw converses, odd, black pants with red suspender straps hanging down, a tight red spaghetti strap shirt, long black hair and last but not least honey brown eyes.
"Asyah?" he said. It wasn't her, he refused to believe it. She wouldn't even look at him so why was she in the boy's dorm smiling at him?
"Yes. I have come to talk. I really miss you, and I need you and Im giving you a chance to apologize." She said the last part firmly. He nodded and he got on his knees in front of her. She raised a eyebrow but didn't say anything. He grabbed her hand and looked into her eyes. Asyah was pulled into sincere silver orbs.
"I love you, and I want to say im sorry for breaking your trust and sleeping with someone else. I am truly sorry. I swear that if you take me back I will never betray your trust again. You are the only girl I want and want to spend all of eternity with. Please asyah will you forgive me?" his words struck a chord in her heart and tugged on it. His eyes burned into hers and asyah knew she could not refuse him; she loved him.
"I will forgive you Draco." she said and it was if she lifted an imaginary weight from his shoulders. He smiled and jumped up and lifted her off her feet and twirled her around. She laughed and he set her down only to capture her lips in a heated kiss. He pulled her close to him and she wrapped her arms around his neck, while his went around her waist.
It was like everything fell into place; she had the perfect boyfriend, a loving father, and had finally released all of her secrets so she was not held down by any painful burdens anymore. As Draco held her in his arm he vowed never to let her go, and to always love her.
He then proceeded to make passionate love to her or make-up sex as it was sometimes called.
After no one should never go 3 and a half months without sex, ever.
A/n: Well? Asyah and Draco are finally back together! Severus and Asyah's father and daughter relationship is finally brought out in the open and acknowledged! Yay! You'll find out what he did at the end of the story, although most of you probably already know. Smart cookies you are. Her and Harry have mended their relationship although they aren't as close as before, but they will be there for each other.
I thank all of you for reviewing and Im sad to say that this story is coming to a close…but are you ready? THERE SHALL BE A SEQUEL! YAY! I can't seem to let this story go! Plus I never wrote a sequel before. Im happy are you happy? I hope so. Autumn's future as of now is uncertain; I simply don't know what to do with her. Should I, A: Kill her off, she had caused enough trouble. Or B: Change her evil ways and make her good, and her and Harry stay together, but this time the love is true? Send in your vote via review! Vote now! Oh god I sound that idiot we have as our president…lol.
Oh and did anyone see the VMA's? It rocked! Especially My Chemical Romance's performance! Go MCR! Go Green Day Too! Gods im hopeless…