005: Distance is the Key

A throbbing headache.

That was the first thing that Angela could even think of when she woke up, but the headache was making it difficult to think of anything.

She slowly opened her eyes and saw white. Very, very white.

"My God, did I die?" she wondered aloud as her head continued to throb.

"Not exactly."

The response threw Angela completely off guard and she jerked her head to the direction of the voice, although she sincerely wished that she hadn't because now her neck ached.

"How are you?" Jack asked as he sat down in the chair next to her bed. Angela soon realized that she was in a hospital.

"What is this? The psych ward?" she half-joked.

Jack smiled. "No, thankfully. But just some overnight surveillance for symptoms of post-traumatic stress."

"Ah, this again," she mused as she looked slowly around the room. "You'd think that I'd have enough of these overnight hospital stays for post-traumatic stress."

"I wasn't sure if what happened yesterday would cause a relapse. It seemed to have."

"What? The whole vomiting and fainting spell? No, I do that on a regular basis."

He looked at her seriously, and her smile faded.

"It might be a small relapse of post-traumatic stress," she admitted as she fiddled with the white sheets on her bed. "But I'm fine. Really."

"So you'll go to therapy sessions for the next month?"

"Like the once I did after last May's incident? The twice a week with a therapist things?"

Jack nodded. "Our therapist's name is Dr. Harris."

"Sounds fine to me."

"I think Samantha should take a page out of your book," Jack grinned.

"She doesn't like therapy sessions?"

"She likes the field more."

"Ah. Well. I'll be fine. Just a mild case of post-traumatic stress."

"Mild?"

Angela stared at him for a few seconds. "This time it's just mild. And it's not relapsing because I shot a guy. It's relapsing because I was forced to vividly remember the May incident."

"Alright," Jack said, looking at her as if he was trying to tell if she was lying to him. "Well, they're going to discharge you this afternoon. Go home, get some rest, and come back to the office tomorrow."

"Sounds good."

Jack stood and looked at her for a few moments. "It was a good shooting. You know that, right?"

Angela nodded. "I know. I'm not doubting it. I just… it's hard to even hold a gun after… well, what happened. In May."

"Understandably so. Get some rest."

As Jack turned to leave, Angela remembered something.

"Oh, Jack?"

"Hmm?" He turned back to look at her.

"Danny… is he… is he alright?"

"A little shaken up. Probably a deep bruise on his chest. He'll live. He owes you."

"Yeah… ok, well. Good. I'm glad he's alright."

"So he can still boss you around?"

"It wouldn't be the same without him," Angela smiled softly. "Bye Jack."

"Sleep," he said as he closed the door behind him.

---

After she was discharged from the hospital, Angela found that she really didn't want to do much except lay on her couch and watch a movie. She picked out a nice, nonviolent movie (one of her favorites, Moulin Rouge) and then settled down for an evening in her pajamas. She got up only to make some Macaroni and Cheese and to go to the bathroom. She even sang to "Elephant Love Melody" as she mixed the milk, butter, and cheese with the pasta.

It seemed as though she really wasn't having a major relapse of post traumatic stress.

Until night came.

Everything seemed to make a strange noise. Everything made scary shadows on the wall. Angela lay in her bed for hours trying to get to sleep, but she couldn't. She couldn't. Flashbacks of the Incident kept popping into her mind. Gunshots. Screaming. Blood.

It wasn't until around three in the morning that she drifted off into a very uneasy and very shallow sleep, with the thought of facing Danny tomorrow in her mind.

---

Angela was almost as nervous coming back the next day as she was on her first day. She was sure that everyone would look at her differently. None of them would understand why she had reacted the way that she had to a shooting. But she wasn't going to tell them either. She didn't have the strength, nor did she want them to know her personal story and to feel sorry for her. That's why she left the Dallas office in the first place.

She had become so sick of people saying, "Oh, poor Angela. Did you hear what happened? Such a tragic accident. It's a shame to loose an agent that way."

The elevator doors opened onto the eighth floor, and Angela stepped out only to almost run right into Vivian.

"Oh!" Angela said, almost alarmed. "Vivian, I didn't see you there. I didn't mean to run into you."

"Not a problem. I didn't spill my coffee," she smiled warmly. Her eyes were searching Angela's face cautiously as she tried to figure out what was going on in her mind. "You doing alright?"

"Never better," Angela lied. "Do we have a new case yet?"

"Not yet. Right now it's paperwork time. There's quite a large stack on your desk."

"There is?" There was usually hardly any paperwork for her after a case. "Oh, right. Because of the… because I was… right, ok, thanks."

Angela started to walk away when Vivian touched her arm lightly. "Are you sure you're alright?"

Taking a deep breath and swallowing her frustration, Angela simply smiled. "I'm fine. I promise."

Vivian looked at her for several moments before letting her go. Angela continued walking to her desk. She knew that Vivian meant well, and she was expecting those types of questions, but it didn't stop her from feeling slightly frustrated. She just wanted to be left alone right now.

But Vivian was right. There was a rather hefty stack of papers on her desk when she arrived. Angela scrunched up her nose in irritation. She loathed paperwork.

"It looks like you're going to be very busy this morning," Samantha said with a small grin as she sauntered over to Angela's desk.

"Ugh. Unfortunately. And I thought I might get a chance to improve my Solitaire score," Angela joked.

"Well, if you need any help with the forms, just ask me."

"I most certainly will. You haven't finished yours already have you?"

"I'm getting there." Samantha paused, and Angela saw the question coming from a mile away.

"Samantha, yes, I'm alright. And I will come to you if I'm not. But for now…" she sighed heavily. "I just need to sort through some things. Ok?"

Samantha nodded and smiled gently. "I understand. It's kind of like when I got shot in the leg. They assigned me to desk work."

"You? Desk work? My God, did you just go up the wall?"

She laughed and nodded. "Just about. Plus everyone asking me if I was alright drove me absolutely insane. So. I completely understand. I'll be over at my desk."

"And I'll be right here."

Samantha walked back to her desk, leaving Angela alone with her large stack of papers. As she sat down in her chair and looked at the top sheet, she sensed someone behind her.

"I'm going to take a big fat guess and say Martin," she said lazily without turning her head.

"It could have been Danny," Martin said, slightly put out that she had guessed correctly.

Angela scoffed. "Mmm. Right. How are you this fine morning?"

"Pretty good. And yourself?"

"I'm getting by."

"And… do you want to… talk?" he asked tentatively.

Angela turned her head to look at him. His eyes were earnest, and he really wasn't trying to pry. He was just trying to be the good guy.

"I'll talk when I'm ready. But thanks."

Martin didn't look hurt, but he looked pained as if seeing her in pain was distressing him. "You sure?"

"Martin," she turned and looked at him seriously. "I'm sure."

Finally catching the hint, he nodded. "Alright. Well. I'm here. You know that, right?"

"Yes, I know. Along with Samantha, Jack, and Vivian."

"Oh. I'm the last one to ask the ever-annoying question 'Are you alright?', huh?"

"Yes, you are."

"Ok. I understand. But I'll be over there."

"And I'll be here."

Martin put his hand on Angela's shoulder briefly before turning and heading back to his own desk.

The rest of the morning, Angela worked steadily through her paperwork, occasionally asking Martin or Samantha a question on one of the sheets. She had seen Danny come in a few minutes after she had come in, and while she really wasn't expecting anything, Angela was a little hurt when Danny didn't exchange a single word with her. She wasn't expecting this to really change anything about their cold relationship, but she thought that at least a "good morning" was in order.

Hell, she would have even been happy if he had asked if she was alright.

Around one o'clock, Angela went into the break room to refill her water glass when she heard voices issuing out of the room.

"Come on, man, you could at least say something to her." That was undoubtedly Martin's voice and it didn't sound very happy. "I mean, she practically saved your life."

"Please, Martin. I had the vest on. There was no way that the guy was going to kill me." Danny. He didn't sound very happy either. "I don't owe her anything."

"I'm not saying that you do, but it's been two months since she's joined this team, and you two have barely had a conversation."

"Is that a crime?"

"No, but… Danny, come on. She's not like Elena. She's—"

"Don't bring her into this, Martin. She has nothing to do with Angela!"

"That's a lie and you know it. You're just sore because Elena never liked you back, so now you're just distancing yourself from her."

"That's—that's—Martin, that's absolutely… that's—"

"It's true and you know it, Danny."

"You don't know what you're talking about," Danny said angrily before storming out of the break room.

Angela backed up several steps, attempting to make it look as if she hadn't been listening to their entire conversation. Danny walked by her, looking at her briefly, but didn't say anything.

Walking into the break room, Angela tried not to look at Martin as she filled up her cup.

"You heard everything, didn't you?" he asked weakly, standing behind her.

"Pretty much," she sighed. She turned and looked at Martin sadly. "I wasn't sure what else I was expecting, you know?"

Martin nodded and then took a step closer. "Can I get you anything?"

"I could use some hot chocolate, but other than that, no."

With a small smile, Martin gave her a sympathetic look. "You'll be alright," he said softly. "Don't mind him."

Angela nodded silently, and before she could stop it, a small tear leaked out of one of her eyes. She turned away from Martin and wiped it away quickly.

Without saying anything else, Martin gave her another encouraging smile and then left the break room, leaving Angela alone with her thoughts.

A/N: There was this huge storm last night and my internet went out. I was totally panicking that I wouldn't be able to post this until tomorrow morning when I got to school, and I was like "Gah! It must work! Everyone's counting on this chapter being put up today!"

And so now it's finally working (knock on wood), and so I'm going to post it quickly before it goes out again.

Ok, let's see. Questions. By the way, does this whole questions thing actually help people? Is it pointless? I just thought it might help to direct your train of thought if you get lost… Anyways, "Wait, so Angela was diagnosed with post-traumatic stress? And that has to do with the Incident that happened in May?" "What was Angela forced to remember so vividly after she shot the guy?" "What does it mean 'It's a shame to loose an agent that way'?" And of course the recurring questions of "What's going to happen between Angela and Danny?" and "WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO HER IN MAY!"

Haha. Don't worry. I think you figure it out next chapter. But you don't get to know until Friday. I know. I'm cruel.

Ok, something weird has been going on when I post a new chapter, the story disappears from the front page of updated stories. It's really weird. It shows up if you search for it, but it doesn't always show up on the front page. It makes me mad because then not everyone sees it. And then that means fewer reviews. :(

Anyways, please review and tell me what you think! It really makes my day! I've got to give some love and cookies out to my favorite reviews ilovemygelding, Andraya TheLat, anmodo, and the MAGNIFICIENT hotchner. You guys make my day. :)

(And yes. Moulin Rouge is one of my favorite movies of all times. If you haven't seen it, go out and rent it. It's amazing.)