ch 10 - all you need is ...amy?

katherine...you are my favorite person lol. and this is going to hopefully be the last sad chap for a while. after this things should lighten up. unless i get devious agian...

blood, blood everywhere...so much...on the knife, in the sink, on her...

Aubrey pushes away that memory as she runs out into the night. She had been celebrating on stage with the rest of them until Cynthia Rose had approached her. She saw Beca and Jesse, still kissing and hugging in the audience and the lack of a certain redhead and knew. She wouldn't let it happen again.

So she tore through the night. She didn't have the faintest idea where to look, but the pained screams that tore through the air were enough of a clue.

She followed them halfway across town. A storm hit and was so loud it almost drowned them out, but Aubrey kept going. She had to.

But then they stopped just as abruptly as they had come. She continued to run in the direction they had been until she reached a bridge. She stopped for a moment to catch her breathe, and she saw someone get up on the ledge.

It was so dark she couldn't tell who it was, but a flash of lightening illuminated the scene. A bellas scarf. the figure began to lean forward.

NO!

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She was falling, plummeting down out of this world. It was strange, the sensation of waiting for the water to hit. Its like the climax of a movie, you know it's coming, but you still can't really prepare for it. But then it hits, and it hits hard.

Maybe harder than it should. Drowning is strange. If you keep your eyes closed then you can't feel the water. and you hear voices, familiar voices, and you feel peaceful.

"OPEN YOUR EYES. C'MON CHLOE. WAKE UP WAKE UP!"

you don't want to open your eyes, but you do.

and it's not what you expect.

You aren't sinking in the dark water. You aren't in a white room or a dark tunnel with a light at the end. There is no God or Gods waiting, no pearly gates...

There's just you, lying on the pavement of the bridge you just tried to jump off, and your best friend holding you, begging you to open yor eyes, and pleading for you to stay with her.

She hugs you tightly and shakes with sobs.

"I'm sorry." Is all you say. You expect her to yell. You expect her to yell at you for putting her through this again. She doesn't. She only hugs you tighter.

The two hugged for another few minutes before they broke apart and sat against the wall of the bridge.

Aubrey looked over at Chloe. "i know you don't want to talk about this, but i have to ask. Is it happening again?"

"No." Chloe looks forward, unmoving. Her voice is so dead it doesn't even sound human anymore. "This was the first time in a while i've done anything like this."

Aubrey lets out a deep breathe. She's trying so hard not to say the wrong thing. Chloe continues.

"I don't know what happened bree. I've been doing good lately, but it's just that every time i start to get better and things start going well, something happens that just blows it all up in my face. I can't take it anymore bree. I can't keep building myself up just to get knocked down again, over and over. I just want it to be over."

Aubrey wrapped Chloe in her arms and held her tightly.

"I hate myself for putting you through this."

Aubrey hugged her tighter and kissed the top of her head. "You aren't putting me through anything. I am choosing to get into this because i care."

"We have to go back." This was the last thing Chloe wanted to do, but she knew they'd have to. "What are we going to tell the girls?"

Aubrey pursed her lips and thought for a moment. "we can just say we got lost and fell in a puddle. I don't know but who cares. Lets go." She stood up and looked down at Chloe, who remained seated.

"C'mon. up up up." She motioned with her hands for Chloe to hurry up.

the redhead smiled and wiped her face.

"Damn puddles."

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Beca couldn't help but reflect on how overrated kissing was. there wasn't fireworks. In fact there wasn't much of anything except two peoples lips touching. shoulda known kissing wasn't really that great.

they finally stopped and Jesse was grinning like a madman

"I knew i'd get you to come around. "He beamed even wider.

beca rolled her eyes. "Yah well. Its the end of the movie so might as well insert the cliche ending here."

"Well then.. If thats all it was." Jesse mocked.

beca pushed him gently. 'Shut it," She looked over and saw the rest of the girls moving into their seats to watch the last three performances. She started to leave to go join them, but Jesse reached out and stopped her. "Stay with me." he pleaded.

She brushed him off slightly. "I can't. I have to be with the girls." He nodded and she moved over to the bellas. She sat next to Cynthia Rose and looked at the girls.

"Hey, " she whispered, "Where are Chloe and Aubrey?"

Cynthia knew it was probably better not to tell the truth, so she simply shrugged. 'Beats me girl."

Beca furrowed her brow and leaned over to ask Stacie if she knew.

"Hey stace, do you - "

Amy's expression changed from one of happiness to one of shock. "What the hell happened?" She asked, staring behind Beca.

Beca turned around to see Aubrey and Chloe slinking into the row in front of them. They were both soaking wet, makeup stil smudged in some places. "fell in a puddle. don't worry." Aubrey said as she scooted down the row. Beca watched them carefully. Something was up. Aubrey's smile was fake and Chloe, well she wasn't even smiling. She also couldn't help but notice that the two had seated themselves as far away from her as possible.

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In celebration of the big wins, barden's two biggest a capella groups decided to throw a party. The Bellas had won the champion title, and the trebles had been runner up. Everyone had gone home to change and freshen up for the party before back over for what was sure to be a very long night.

Benji had already picked out his outfit for the night. the top layer was a button up and loose jeans, and underneath it was a Flash costume. He tried to convince Jesse to go as Green lantern or superman, but Jesse wasn't in on it.

When the two arrived, jesse immediately went on the hunt for beca, leaving Benji alone. He wandered for a bit, unsure of who to talk to.

"Hey, Benji Right?"

He turned around to see Stacie smiling at him.

"oh hey, yah. Your uhh Stacie?"

"Yup the one and only!"

"Congrads on your big win tonight. You guys were fantastic."

Stacie snagged two drinks out of a passerby's hands and handed one to him. "Thanks. I didn't know you could sing so well. It almost blew me away as much as your magic tricks."

Benji blushed a little. He wanted to whip out another trick but he couldn't with his Flash costume on.

Stacie looked at him and furrowed her brow slightly. 'Ya know," She approached him. "Flannels look better unbuttoned." She began to open his shirt when she noticed the costume underneath.

"is that a Flash costume?"

"uhh yah," benji began re-buttoning. "I'm not really this lame though i swear. I'm not a total nerd."

Stacie simply smiled and slowly unbuttoned her flannel to reveal a Supergirl costume underneath. Benji couldn't help but smile.

Meanwhile, Amy was getting the party started with body shots and karaoke. Aubrey attached herself at the hip to Chloe, and neither were drinking.

Beca had arrived fashionably late of course, in hopes of not drawing too much attention to herself. Amy made sure to shatter that hope by announcing her arrival over the speaker systems. Jesse was at her side in a heartbeat, throwing his arm around her shoulder and leading her into the party.

"You missed a lot Becaw. remind me to never let you be late again."

He began dancing horrendously to Amy singing Brittany Spears If You seek amy. the boy had no rythem, and no shame. Beca laughed at him.

"Ok there hot shot. You're gunna set the floor on fire with those moves."

Jesse smirked up at her and kept dancing. "i'll take that as a compliment."

Hours went by and Beca was having a good time, laughing with jesse and everyone and watching Amy do ridiculous things, like streak for one. She sat down for a moment to catch her breathe after laughing so hard when Titanium began to play. She immediately thought about Chloe, and then realized that she hadn't really seen Chloe at all.'

She searched throughout the room until she found her and Aubrey, sitting quietly at a table in the back. Beca knew this wasn't like them at all. They should have been up dancing and socializing and getting so drunk that other bellas had to take them home. They weren't. They were just sitting quietly in the back, unnoticed. Chloe began to get up and whispered something to Aubrey. it looked like Aubrey was trying to keep her sitting, but Chloe seemed to convince her to let her go.

Beca walked quickly over to Aubrey. Something was wrong and she intended on finding out what.

"Hey Beca. Hows the party?" Aubrey asked kindly.

"What's going on?"

Aubrey's eyes narrowed in confusion. "What do you mean?'

Beca rolled her eyes and moved closer. "You know exactly what i mean. Something is up and i want to know what."

Aubrey sighed and folded her hands on the table. "It's really not any of your concern." She said calmly.

"No it is." She raised her voice. "Something has my best friend and her demon of a best friend depressed and sitting in a corner when they should be up having a good time. I want to know what."

Aubrey smacked her lips and rose sharply from the table. "I think we should move this discussion outside." She turned and abruptly made her way outside to the balcony. Beca followed.

"Firstly, " She began. "I don't appreciate you calling me a demon. I thought we were on better terms than that." Beca opened her mouth to interrupt but Aubrey demanded she finish. "Secondly, there's nothing going on that YOU need to know about. She'll be fine. Now go back inside."

Beca let out an angry laugh. "ya know what Aubrey? i'm sick of your shit. You act so fucking high and righteous like you really care or that you have everything in control. You don't really care about Chloe. You treat her like shit and walk all over don't care about if she's really hurting. You just have to make sure she's there to be your fucking carpet."

There was a moment of tense silence before Aubrey lifted a shaking hand at her. "How. Dare. you." Each word dripped with anger. "HOW. Fucking. Dare you say that i don't care about Chloe. You don't have the faintest fucking idea about us or our relationship."

"Well why don't you enlighten me?"

Aubrey crossed her arms. "It's really not my place to be telling you this, but since your so thick headed i think its best for me to tell you before you do something stupid." She motioned sternly for Beca to take a seat.

Beca sat back angrily. "Nothing you say is going to convince me of anything other than you being a total bitch. I've been there for her when you weren't."

Aubrey had had enough of this. "REALLY?" She yelled so loud Beca jumped. "Were you there for her when she showed up at your door after being beaten up? Were you there for her when she starting cutting because everyone around her was telling her she was a dumb slut? or that she should just kill herself? Were you there for her when she decided that because that's what people thought of her that that was what she should do? Were you the one to pull her out of bed and force her to clean herself up? Were you the one who kept her from dropping out of school? The one who stopped her from sleeping with just about everyone because she hated herself so fucking much? Were you the one who knew something was wrong one day, so you went over to her house only to find the bathroom door locked? And when you finally broke through found her lying in a pool of her own blood almost dead because she decided to kill herself? Did you fucking hold her and beg her to stay with you because she was your best friend and you couldn't loose her? Were you the one cleaning her blood off the floor and her? No. You weren't. So shut the hell up and stop acting like you know something."

She burst into tears. Beca just sat, mouth open. Words couldn't express how much a jerk she felt like at that moment.

"Aubrey, i..i'm so sorry. I had no idea...i..."

Aubrey looked up and wiped her eyes. "I know. I'm sorry i snapped at you. it's just that it really bugged me that you thought i didn't care, because i care more than anyone else."

Beca looked at Aubrey. She was obviously deeply bothered by the whole situation. "You are a really good friend Aubrey. And im really sorry that things have been so messed up between us."

"me to."

"I know that something else happened today. I'd like to know about it, but if you don't want to tell i understand."

Aubrey studied Beca's expression closely. After deciding that Beca truly did care she answered. "You see that bridge over there?" She pointed to the bridge across from them. beca nodded.

"She tried to jump off of it."

Beca couldn't understand. "but seemed so happy lately. I mean, we did a great job performing and..why did she do it?"

Aubrey knew it was best to lie. "I don't know."

The two sat quietly for a moment looking out over the bridge, until they heard the glass door to the balcony open. They turned to see Chloe standing in the doorway looking between the two.

"Hi Chlo." beca said softly, smiling gently.

Chloe shifted her gaze to Aubrey. what did you tell her?

Aubrey got up and hugged Chloe, whispering, "Just sit with her. I'll be inside."

Chloe walked slowly over to the edge of the balcony and stared in the direction of the bridge. "It's nice to see you two socializing. What were you talking about?"

Beca moved up next to Chloe. "She wasn't going to tell me anything, but i said that she didnt care about you and it all just tumbled out."

Chloe closed her eyes. i guess this means she knows everything. "I'm sorry, i didn't want you to find out like this. I wanted to tell you myself. I'm sorry everything happened like this, and i'm just glad your happy but -"

Beca turned Chloe to face her. "Chlo this isn't about me. Who cares if i'm happy." She took Chloe's hands in hers. "I don't know why you tried to jump tonight, but i do know that i care about you. I want you to be happy. now that i know what you're going through, i need you to promise me something."

Chloe nodded. She was shocked by how intense Beca was getting.

"Promise me that you won't do it again. Promise me that anytime you feel sad or angry or that you want to do something like this, that you will come find me or Aubrey. Please promise me that."

Chloe gripped beca's hands tighter. "I promise."

Beca pulled Chloe into a tight hug and buried her face in her neck. Chloe could feel Beca's wet tears on her neck. they stayed close for a minute until Beca pulled back to wipe her face.

"I'm sorry. I'm not usually this emotional. i just, really care about you."

Chloe smiled at her. She might not get to have Beca romantically, but she definitely would have her as a friend. And maybe, just maybe that was enough. i guess in the end, all you need is -

"BEWARE THE FAT NAPPER!"

Beca and Chloe looked down to see Amy running, barely clad, holding an entire keg of beer. As if that wasn't strange enough, Flash And super girl were chasing her down.

"That's not something you see everyday." Beca shook her head and looked at Chloe. "Maybe we should just go back inside."

"Yah i think thats for the better."

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