Author's Note #1:

Look at that! I got a new chapter up rather quickly! :D Let's see how long I can keep this up LOL

Chapter 6: Remorse

Gabriel had made his way to the restroom after he left the kitchen and on his way there, he noticed that Castiel had a document open on his computer when he passed the office. He didn't immediately go to read it because he had waited long enough to piss as it was. After relieving himself, he made sure that he could still hear Castiel in the kitchen doing the prep work for dinner and quietly made his way into the office. He started the document from the beginning and was immediately hooked. But concern made it's way into his heart as he realized that his brother had written himself into his own story.

If anything, Gabriel is more sad than scared. He knows that despite what his brother says about enjoying his solitude that Castiel is actually a very lonely creature. Just as he finished reading the last line, he heard the telltale sounds of his brother making his way into the room.

"I didn't give you permission to read that!" Castiel yelled in a panic.

"Cassie...what is this?" Gabriel asked barely above a whisper. He needs to know just how worried he should be about his brother before jumping to any conclusions.

"I-it's...It's the story I plan on turning in little less than a month from now," Castiel answered sheepishly. He doesn't know how his brother is going to take this. He hadn't wanted him to find out just yet. God, he's always screwing up!

"And why did you write yourself into it?"

"I honestly don't have an explanation..." Castiel is looking to the ground when Gabriel turns around.

"Cassie, look at me." Castiel slowly brings his tear filled eyes level with Gabriel's. "As long as you don't let this get to your head and you can separate reality from what you're writing, I can be ok with this. Alright? You just spend way too much time on your own and I worry about you. I want you to be happy but if you get too caught up in this and you lose sight of what's real, PROMISE me that you will come talk to me about it." Gabriel takes Castiel's hand in his own and rubs his thumb in circles as he waits for Castiel to calm himself down.

"I do, I promise I will tell you. I just...I am lonely, Gabriel. This character just popped into my head the other day and I don't know why I felt the need to write myself into the story but I did and I can't change it; I don't want to change it. I guess Dean is the kind of man I hope to find one day."

"I can't say I blame you, Cassie, he's got a certain charm to him," Gabriel chuckled lightly. The brothers stood there another minute longer before the distinct smell of the chicken brought them to their senses. "Well, let's go get dinner finished and enjoy each other's company, whaddaya say?"

After dinner, the boys enjoyed a movie together before Gabriel finally left late in the evening with the promise that he would be keeping more in touch with him. Castiel immediately crashed on his bed. He was too emotionally drained to do anything but sleep. His heart was heavy with sadness by the time he fell asleep.

The next morning, he woke to a sudden jolt that ran through his body and his heart pounding with a renewed vigor. He can't explain why but he felt as if he had just been given a second chance. The first thing he does is make himself a quick breakfast and heads for the shower. When he goes to his room, he dresses in jeans and a t-shirt before grabbing his shoes. When he's ready, he makes his way to the park near his complex and walks around for a bit before sitting at a bench where he could see little kids playing. He looked over to the empty bench beside him and couldn't help picturing a certain green eyed man sitting there so they could wax philosophical together surrounded by life and nature. Castiel finds his heart aching again for a man that cannot possibly exist in his world. When he felt that he was getting a little too invested in his emotions again, he walked back to his apartment to write. He can at least make sure that the fictional version of himself can find happiness.

Dean and Castiel drive around the busy city for a while before they end up at a diner like the one they had attempted to eat at a few days ago. After they order, Dean turns to Castiel and merely smiles. Castiel blushes and squirms a little in embarrassment. When Dean reaches to places his hand over Castiel's, the smaller man pulls his hand away in surprise.

"Dean, someone might see," he whispers.

"Yeah, so? What's wrong with that?" asks Dean with a chuckle.

"Isn't public display of affection frowned upon?"

"Only in excess! I just wanted to hold your hand, Cas. Come on, put your hand back. If someone says something, ignore them, alright?"

Castiel still seemed skeptical but hesitantly replaced his hand on the table where Dean immediately grabbed a hold of it and rubbed circles with his thumb. Castiel felt himself relaxing into the touch. When their food arrived, Castiel begrudgingly took back his hand so he could enjoy his burger.

"So, Cas, I gotta ask, when did you start writing?" Dean asks through a mouthful of burger. Usually Castiel would be put off by someone eating in that manner but is surprised to find that he isn't.

"I would say that it was when I was very young. I had to keep it a secret after I had initially told my parents my wish to be an author one day. They took over choosing my courses for me throughout high school and college after that. My brother, Gabriel, had always fought for me and tried to encourage me whenever and wherever he knew our parents couldn't hear him. I spent many a night writing stories and reading them to him. Those are my fondest memories," finished Castiel with a small smile.

"I'd like to meet your brother some time. He seems like my kinda guy. I understand the whole big brother thing having a little-well, freakishly huge- brother myself. I never wanted anything bad to happen to him and encouraged him in his studies," Dean is looking off in the distance as if lost in a memory. Castiel can't help but smile along with him. "Anyway, your turn to ask."

"What ignited your love for cars?" asks Castiel after a brief moment.

"I'd have to say that it was this girl I fell in love with. Dad brought her home one day and it was love at first sight for me. She was an older gal so we had to wait til I was the right age to be with her, though. She had this gorgeous dark skin, all the right curves on her body, and she purrs when you're ridin' her just right," says Dean in a playful tone and a wink.

Castiel looked increasingly crestfallen as Dean spoke. How could he compare to this female? He didn't have curves, he didn't have dark skin...Before Castiel could get too far with his thoughts, he heard Dean laughing outright.

"Cas, I'm sorry, I thought it would be pretty obvious I was talking about my car!" he gasped between laughs.

Castiel was now even more embarrassed than before. "It's not funny, Dean."

"You're right, I'm sorry," Dean apologizes again as he wipes away tears from the corners of his eyes.

By now the men have almost finished eating and their waitress has made her way back to refill their drinks.

"Would you boys like any desserts today?" she asks with a smile. She's a cute little young thing that a few days ago Dean would have definitely tried to get a number from but he can't say he's missing out either, he has Castiel now.

"If you've got pie, Sarah, I'd like a slice, sweetheart," answers Dean politely after seeing her name on her name tag.

"Sure thing, hun, what kind?" Sarah pulls out her notepad to jot down the order.

"Cherry, please. Cas, do you want one, too?"

Castiel looks a little bashfully at Dean when he answers, "I've never had cherry pie..."

"Good God, Cas," breathed out Dean. He turns to the waitress and says in a serious tone, "Can you make that three slices of cherry pie? He's gonna wanna have one for later seeing as my boyfriend's been deprived of all the good things in life."

"Sure thing, sugar, be right back!" Sarah calls as she makes her way to the kitchen.

Dean turns his attention back to a blushing Castiel and can't help thinking that he's never seen anything so cute in his entire life. Their waitress makes her way back to them with two plates of steaming hot pie and a carry-out box with the third slice. Dean stops her before she can leave, "Can we get a check please, darlin'?"

Sarah nods her head before stalking off again.

The mechanic motions for Castiel to take the first bite. The blue eyed man picks up his fork and takes a tentative bite out of the pie and lets out a low groan of satisfaction.

"Oh my God, Dean. This is delicious," Castiel lets out a little breathlessly as he goes for a second and third bite in quick succession.

"Y-yeah," replies Dean after nervously clearing his throat. Who knew that watching/hearing somebody eat could be such a turn on? He nervously rubs his thighs and tries his hardest to look away from Castiel but in vain. He is saved when Sarah comes back to them with the check.

"Here ya are, baby, y'all can pay on your way out. Have a nice afternoon, boys," she finishes with a knowing smirk pointed at Dean who smiles nervously back at her. Dean vacuums up his pie so they can leave as soon as Castiel finishes his own slice.

Dean manages to make it through the following minutes with only a racing heart, thanking whatever gods exist for keeping away the boner he was sure was there right before he stood up. He reached into his back pocket for his wallet as he read the check and smiled to himself when he finished. Castiel glanced at him confused so Dean handed him the check. Underneath their total it read:

Your meal is on the house!

Y'all were too cute and I

wanted to wish y'all happiness!

-Sarah

Castiel almost didn't know what to do. No one is ever this nice to him. He pulls a ten from his wallet and leaves it for the waitress as a tip and the two men smile at her as they leave the establishment.

"Where to now, Cas?" Dean asks from behind the wheel.

Castiel calls it a day for now and saves his document and starts making himself dinner. After eating, he puts on a movie and wakes up after having fallen asleep halfway through. He stretches and turns off his TV and goes to bed. He lays there for quite some time thinking about how to pace the next few chapters. He knows that it is generally frowned upon for people to have sex on a first date so he will skip that for now. They could go to a fair, or go and watch a movie even...Castiel is finding it increasingly difficult to steer past the topic of sex now that he's thought about and he keeps coming back to it and he wonders how he is supposed to write the racy parts of the novel if he has yet to experience it. He hadn't really given it much thought before now. Asking Gabriel is absolutely out of the question and the only thing that watching porn would do is to show him the carnal side of having sex and that's not what he wants to do. He wants to write a love scene and the only way for him to know how to write it would be find out first hand. The only problem is Dean Winchester isn't real and he's not giving his most precious gift to just anyone.

Author's Note #2:

Alrighty girls, I think at least one or two of you have asked when Dean is going to show up in the "real world" and although I won't give any details, it will be soon :) Maybe 5-ish chapters? I can't say for certain :( But fret not, my dears! It will totally be worth the wait! ;D