End Of Scrolls

~ Chapter Sixteen~

No Roads Left

By Inuyashas Youkai

Standing alone with no direction...

Nestled within that of Inuyasha , against the trunk of a nearby tree , happily watching the young playing, and without any reminders of any pain, nor remorse.

How did I fall so far behind?

Although , something within her mind ,was trying to threaten her comfortable haze that seemed to slightly falter , and give away to the willingly forgotten wrong trying to enter forcefully , against her will, thus confusing her somewhat.

Why am I searching for affection?

Then the warmth would come , starting the whole cycle over again, making her forget , as to what it was in the first place.

Knowing its something I wont find..

Hearing the voices of three brush up against that of her soul tenderly , ranging from love , devotion, and desperation .

In my fear I've lost,

Welcoming the attention knowing that its loving flame somehow must have been better than the long lived chill, shuddered from prior.

I've let myself down again..

Subtle heartbeats joining that of her own to comfort , and to be a reminder that she was not alone, but deep down still was.

All Because, I run.

"I 'am sorry I hurt you , Kagome .. Come back to me mate , I need you .. Please don't leave me , not like this ..."

Til the silence splits me open,

Shudder...

I run.

But as the ties between them reformed between them , so had the memories , reminding her of the day it all started .

Til it puts me underground,

The day he left her , hating her as his own mate , and shattered that of her soul , as the ties binding them were violently ripped from her , the moment Inuyasha vanished for sometime from her life ...

"Inuyasha , where are we ?"

Til I have no breath

Brown eyes opened suddenly after hearing those words, and then soon found that she was still in the grassy valley from which she once was before she lost consciousness .

And no roads left but one.

Looking up into young amber eyes , as a child held her close snuggling her so that she would know that he wouldn't ever leave her , making her feel safe , and protected .

When did I lose my sense of purpose..

"Silly girl , we haven't gone anywhere .. I was just watching you, and waiting for you to come back to me.."the child hanyou said, but all her eyes could find was the replaced image of the Inuyasha, the one before he left despising her , and disappearing from her life ..

Can I regain whats lost inside?

"Dammit ! Why isn't she moving ? Fuck , Me ! Come on Kagome , please mate .. Come back to me , please.." was heard from far away, still being held close, protectively , while feeling random places where slight pressure was applied frantically , and then something where she should've felt pain , but she did not.

Why do I feel like I deserve this?

Behind her eyes , hearing a pleading voice of what she presumed to be Inuyasha , in time becoming either pissed off , or scared that she wasn't responding , then seeing a different vision contorting into that of something else quite opposite, glaring back at her.

Why does my pain look like my pride?

Noting the look in his eyes as they seem to pin her with the hate shown in them , hatred seemingly for her..Kagome shivered in the fear that her mate somehow now hated her ..

In my fear I've lost,

" I'll never leave you , Kagome.. I love you.." Young Inuyasha offered ,while tightening the hug that he had her in , looking at her lovingly, and her snuggling into it too escape the cold of a painful memory.

I've let myself down again..

Eyes of love changed once again as if some unknown force was seeking control of him, breeding the hatred within, at the same time lingered confusion, just as another seemed to fight for its place within his muddled mind , and that was the scent of his pups lingering within his abandoned mate ,

All Because,

Kagome ..

I've let myself down,

Though the latter soon went forgotten , his eyes darkening with a sneer, with the passing whispers fading with the fleeting truth were consumed in the destructive path hatred set, for the one he once loved..

In my fear I've lost,

' I 'am sorry Kagome, I should've listened .. I 've should've stayed.. Forgive me.. Whatever you do , live for me , so I can find you again '

I run.

I love you Inuyasha , always have .. Know that I don't blame you for any of it mate .."

Til the silence splits me open,

" I am glad to only hear you laugh , knowing that you are happy with me .." young Inuyasha said lazily , leaning back on her lap so she can reach easier , and continue in her rather delicious treatment of his ears..

I run.

' I am the demon residing within , in result of the mates now fragile bond..I search for the strongest youkai, that would be being will not be able to survive like she is for long ,as what once bond her as one is non nonexistant , and because of this a fissures been formed , soon both sides will war against the next until the one you now see is destroyed , and no longer existent, in any form. You need to locate her mate , before it' s too late Why does mate hate me so... Is it because now that he created me, doesn't like what he see's? What did mate do to warrant this type of rejection from her own?Maybe I should allow to be destroyed , then I wouldn't have so much darkness left over to feed .. Her soul is pulling from the Jyaki within me , letting go in defeat ..She needs mate before both are lost in a mindless rage '

Til it puts me underground

" Lil brother, I am gonna bind her Jyaki , and Ki to mine , to anchor her to her dissolving lifeline .

Your mate is safe with me ,until your make your return.. The only thing I suggest is to make haste , because I am not sure for how long either of us can hold on much longer in this state .. Your mate needs hers, as I need mine .

Til I have no breath

"I hate how I am falling for you Bitch ..! Knowing someday I may have to let you go.."

And no roads left but one.

" I hate that I want you like I do !"

No roads left but one.

As he watched Kagome 's form hanyou form disappear from sight , Inuyasha wondered what had occurred , as to make him hate her the way he did , it wasn't something chosen . It just happened . One day he remembered loving her , then the next the hanyou could feel nothing but hate for her, but then he remembered something sparked from something his brother said about the Kurai sword, and the words Kagome spoke so long ago regarding the reasons it was gifted to her...

In my fear I've lost,

' Is this what you meant father ? Was this the reason you left Kagome the Kurai , to protect her , from me ? Was Kagome right all along , knowing that I would one day leave her as I have , hating her , for reasons I don't even remember?'

I've let myself down again..

"Mate don't be like that I was only playing , besides it was you who ended up interfering when you shot me with your arrow !" the youkai lord teased, trying to take the malevolent edge of the miko's aura when brought to the surface of old memories past , ones that contained fragments of time when her mate didn't exactly hate her.

All Because, I run.

"Goodnight , Kagome...Don't worry all of this will be over soon.."

Til the silence splits me open,

" Sorry Inuyasha , its not your fault , really ... Don't worry about it , okay ?"Kagome offered to comfort him , reaching to grasp his ear to rub them , but the hanyou child grasp hers in his little one's holding them tightly then whispered..

I run.

"Kagome..." Inuyasha spoke devastatly broken as his thoughts revolved that of his missing mate , and finished his sentence before leaving to find the one he last remembered seeing before he was separated from his mate ..

And it puts me underground,

"I could never hate you... I would die without you by my side , for I love you that much .."

And there's no more breath

"No , Kagome .. Listen to me I don't know what happened for you to appear to me like this now , nor do I know what caused this but know that I could not intentionally leave my mate for anyone or for any reason , unless it was forced . I could never hate you , or the pups you now carry . I will worry about it because as your mate at any age its my job to care for you no matter what stupidity I lead you too believe .. I want you, and you alone ..Okay ?"The child Inuyasha told her while smiling ..

And no more Roads left to go.

' If you can hear me , you don't need to worry ..Our mate needs us , and I will keep her to prevent breaking her indefinitely later ..I will love her , and keep her happy , and safe with me , because I will never leave her. ' Little Inu thought within his mind his eyes closed , hoping beyond hope that his older self would be able to hear him in order to protect her at costs, even from his older self to stay away..

TBC...