Author's Notes: This story would not be possible without the contributions of fellow user dori4n, who's fellow love of this smaller "Heroes" ship, chatting about head canon, and Skype roleplaying helped to inspire and create this story. So if you like it please, make sure to check out their page and stories as well.

[Please see bottom of each chapter for translations to Japanese words or phrases used by the characters.]

I wanted to die. This time Hiro couldn't hide his pain and as he tried to blink away his tears again, he only caused them to fall on his cheeks. Quickly he wiped them away with the palm of his hand, embarrassed to appear so weak in front of anyone, even more in front of him, of this man, this so important man. "I couldn't stay." His Japanese accent was even worse than ever and with his shaken voice, his words were barely understandable. So he changed, deciding to go back to his mother tongue, knowing Kensei knew it perfectly. "I had things to do, I couldn't stay because… Because it would have been an incredibly dangerous thing to do to time." Practical, righteous, as always, no matter how much he'd desired to stay.

The blond immortal watched as his companion quickly wiped away any evidence of emotion from his face when he told him that he had wanted to die, his voice, and his English becoming progressively more broken as he spoke, until finally he relented, regressing back to his native and more practiced tongue. "I know my Carp," he nodded softly. He had always known somewhere in the back of his mind that he would not be able to stay, he'd just tried to forget about it as often as he could. "I understand, even then as much as I hated it. I just wish that I could have come with you," he admitted ruefully. But of course this was equally ridiculous and damaging to the timeline. How different the world might have been if he had simply run away from his own history to follow his Carp into his.

Is it easier if you can't see me, my Carp, the blond thought cautiously, if you can squint and pretend I'm someone else? No, such thoughts could only be his insecurity, his doubts that this might actually be real and not so desperate and lucid fantasy from within his underground prison. But even if this had been true, he doubted whether it would have mattered much, by now he was too desperate, too selfish to stop himself. Kensei took a few tentative steps forward closing the gap between the two of them his hands reaching down and slowly taking the glasses from Hiro's fingers, wiping them clean against the tail of his untucked shirt, before gently sliding them back on his face, his bright blue eyes meeting his always expressive and beautiful dark brown ones, waiting as he blinked a few times for the spark of recognition that would tell him his eyes were focused once more. Look at me, he pleaded silently, and when he did, the blond let his own eyes flutter closed, tilting his head and slowly descending upon his lips, a very cautious and tentative hand fearing rejection moving up his spine to slowly run his fingers through the ends of his hair.

Through the blurry mess of faded colors he could distinguish in the darkness of the graveyard, the time traveler saw his one time friend leaning over him, even if he couldn't see his face, when he felt his fingers brushing his, he swallowed his saliva with some difficulty. Hiro didn't move, willing to face whatever would happen now and actually… This brief contact had not been unpleasant at all. Suddenly he could see again. Two sapphires staring at him. He blinked. This smile, always too fine from Kensei's too thin lips, those blond locks, a bit wild but short enough not to go in his eyes. Hiro didn't move, staring back in anticipation, not really knowing how he would handle what would happen, two things fighting inside of him: his education, and his own will.

He saw Kensei leaning toward him, slowly, so slowly the time traveler wondered if his power hadn't been triggered by something to slow down the man before him. The feeling of his long fingers curling on the nape of his neck sent a shiver down his spine, both from fear and excitation. He could do it. After all, he had wanted to do it he knew, he had even dreamt about it more than once, when he was back in time with his hero but also later, in his own time, when he was lying in his bed after an especially exhausting day. He remembered, in this strange state of half sleep, close to a meditative trance, that he'd dreamt about Kensei's embrace, he'd seen him instead of Yaeko, under the sakura, his hero's lips against his instead of the princess' ones. Hiro let his eyes go shut and waited, his heart pounding. Waited… Waited… What in the name of all the Kamis could took him so long?

Eventually he opened his eyes again to see the blond frozen, so very close to his lips he should have felt his breath against his skin but… His fingers were still behind his head-now no longer moving, and Hiro understood- he had stopped the time without even noticing. Too nervous… He'd always been too nervous, but he'd thought himself ready now, willing... So what was stopping him? Then he caught a glimpse of one of the graves behind him and he knew. He could see his father's severe look glaring at him with disapprobation, he could hear his strict voice commanding him to avenge him, not to make out with his murderer. All his father's cold anger was upon him and Hiro could feel it right through his bones, knocking at his heart, pressuring him. He couldn't do it… He shouldn't. Then, he remembered another look, so softer, so sweet, loving eyes watching over him and his beloved mother's voice whispering inside of him that he could do it because he could save him. Still… Despite all the horrors his father had done, Hiro kept a great respect for him. He'd made up his mind, and taking hold of Kensei's free hand, squinted concentrating.

When Adam felt the time passing again, the air was different, cooler, almost chilly, a breeze was messing with his hair and instead of the dry grass he could smell… Sakura? The immortal stumbled a little, eyes opening in confusion and surprise. He'd been afraid that Hiro had changed his mind, frozen him once more to wake in his coffin and tomb 6 feet under, or that maybe it had all been a dream. Images flashing before his eyes like the prayers of an all too desperate man. But then he saw his Carp, and then none of it mattered, because before he could even think of anything else, Hiro was standing on the balls of his feet to reach the taller man, and pulling him down a little to crush his mouth against his own, two arms throw themselves around his neck as his mouth crashed over the immortal's own. Hiro had found his courage, recovered his nerves, and made a choice. He wanted it-wanted him. More than he'd ever wanted anyone else, including Yaeko. The little man had taken control of himself and for once, he was doing something selfish, something only for him. Oh, of course, he knew he could keep an eye on him, he knew he could help him and he was willing to do so but… It was not the most important thing.

It was not a very talented kiss to be honest, it was a bit clumsy, a bit shy but God, it was so passionate, so true… So Hiro. Even when he didn't know how to do things, if he wanted them, he put all his little heart into them and right now, he most certainly was, even if it remained a rather chaste kiss, just lips against lips, not daring to move further. At this very moment, Hiro felt like he had finally fixed something long broken, like he was doing the right thing, the most important one in his whole life and he felt complete, justified. After a few seconds he let go off the blond man, unaware of the effect he might have had on him and pushed his glasses back with his index, his round cheeks still bearing a persistent shade of pink. He awkwardly passed his tongue on his upper lips to give him time to pull himself back together before explaining why they were standing under those pink Japanese cherry tree instead of where they had been before. "I couldn't give you a proper kiss you on the top of my father's grave…"

It was not a particularly graceful kiss, if the immortal was honest in his appraisal of it. It was more like Hiro, a bit clumsy, clearly something he had set his mind to and plunged headlong into, but it was enthusiastic, energetic… Perfect the blond assessed, arms wrapping back around the shorter man gratefully, clinging to him as though he were life itself, staring on in dumb, stunned, and happy disbelief as he slowly pulled back away from him again some moments later. He watched him push his glasses back up the bridge of his nose, took in the bright pink flush on his cheeks, and—god he nearly lost control and all sense of himself as he watched his tongue nervously flit out to lick his upper lip, wanting nothing so much as to grab him and yank him into another kiss, plunging his tongue into his mouth and finally find out what this incredible young man tasted like. But then he spoke, and his heart dropped ever so slightly, as did his gaze.

With great difficulty the immortal forced his now heavy blue eyes back to Hiro's brown ones. "I am sorry, Carp," he whispered softly. It was difficult even now with what the Company, his own brainchild to make the world a better place, had put him through, to feel guilty about killing some of it's founders. Some, it still felt, had gotten what they deserved. And in over 400 years, he'd not made it a habit or regular practice of apologizing to anyone, much less feeling any guilt or regret for what he had done. But he was sorry for the pain he'd caused him, for his father, for all of it. Fleetingly he thought of asking him to take him back, so that he could change it, make it all right the first time through, but he knew that they couldn't. And had it been any other way, but this he might not have been standing in this beautiful place his time traveler had carried him to for the sole purpose of kissing him. "Gomen'nasai, Hiro," he whispered again, voice trembling slightly with emotion.

Translations:

Gomen'nasai- I'm sorry/ I'm very sorry