My quest for writing for everything is interrupted by a trip to Stratford which will be freaking beast. But here's something to hold you guys up. Basically a protestation about the underestimation of Gleeson Hedge and his perma-placement as 'comic relief' when really he has the potential of EVERYTHING.

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters portrayed below.

Attached

He was getting impatient. The Council of Cloven Elders had let him go for it, that was an accomplishment all in itself, and now Chiron was taking his jolly time to read through Hedge's resume and letters of accomplishment.

"How old are you, Gleeson?" Chiron asked.

"In satyr years or..?"

"Human," Chiron said. "Always assume human."

"Oh," he said. To cover up his mistake he covered proudly, "Nobody had told me that."

"Well now I have, haven't I?" Chiron said. "I'll assume thirteen."

Hedge didn't correct him and so Chiron went ahead. He regretted snapping at the centaur nearly right away. The guy had the power, with a single signature or lack of, to decide if Hedge got to go be a seeker- the first step to becoming a searcher, after all.

"Do you think I'll like being a seeker, Chiron?" Hedge asked, trying to be more polite.

"Hmm," Chiron asked. "I don't know Hedge. You'll like the traveling, and the fighting according to your file. But it's not an easy job. You get attached to kids, you really do."

Hedge rolled his eyes. Sure.

"You don't believe me?" Chiron said. The old centaur handed Hedge a slip of paper. "Go and see for yourself."

Thirty Three Years Later

There wasn't much to do. Piper's old man was asleep. Hedge had cleaned him up a bit- swapped jackets, picked the twigs out of his hair- that kind of stuff. He didn't even want to know what had happened to the guy to get him in this kind of state.

So anyways, he didn't have to worry about the passed out guy he was supposed to bring home and if he ate one more Styrofoam cup he'd burst. What was there to do? Look out the windows at the Californian airspace wondering if he'd see the second Big Bang or smoke or anything to indicate that Grace, McLean and Valdez…

Screw it.

He had to take his mind off of things.

"Flight attendant, you got any good movies on here?" Hedge called.

One year later

Hedge just couldn't.

But at the same time, he knew that he couldn't be as absent as he'd been when Percy and Annabeth had fallen out of Tartarus. Not now. The kids were devastated.

Especially Zhang. That one was still on the ground. He'd been lying flat on his stomach with his hands stretched into Tartarus –gods knew how he'd even been able to keep the strength in them to hold on to her. Well, hold on until… yes.

"Hazel," he panted over and over again- as if he was trying to summon her back Bloody-Mary-style. "Hazel."

Calling out for a girl that would never hear a human voice again. Hedge barely had the strength to hear it.

Jason knelt by him and tried to soothe him, but Hedge saw him crying. Jason Grace, out of all people, was crying. Quiet tears for the first cousin, the first family, he'd ever had.

Great.

Percy and Annabeth were laying on their sides and Percy was trying to look up. Piper was keeping them down and covering them in metallic emergency blankets, looking for ambrosia and nectar and water through their supplies, focusing on something other than reality. Nico was holding Annabeth's leg straight until they could immobilise and bandage it, his back turned to the spot in which the doors of death had previously stood. Leo searched his tool belt for this and that to distract himself and keep his hands busy, biting back tears.

Hedge stopped by Piper.

"McLean, drop the god food. Hydrate them-especially him, no son of Poseidon should even go to Hades to begin with, much less Tartarus. Valdez, go back to the ship and prep it. You two- glad you're safe. Hope there wasn't any funny business in there."

"You know it, coach," Percy managed to pant.

Hedge squeezed Nico's shoulder.

"Keep holding her like that. Good, you're doing good kid."

"I'm not meant to have a sister, am I?" Nico said quietly.

What the hell did you answer to that?

"No, you're meant to have the absolutely best ones," Hedge said. "The ones who have to go and do great things."

Last but not least, most difficult… Frank.

He knelt next to him.

"Kid," he said. "Kid, look at me."

Frank couldn't.

"Kid," he said. He pushed the thought of Hazel out of his mind. Hazel, the short one who could roar. Hazel, who put everyone in their place after a tiring life of being pushed around. Oh gods. Hazel, Hazel, Hazel. Why did she go and close the doors of death herself? Hedge should have done it. Pushed them all out of the way and gone it himself.

No. Mourning was for later. Right now he had to focus on the kids who were there.

"Kid, she's gone, but she left the world her way," Coach said.

Frank hid his face in his hand and turned to mush as Hedge nodded to Jason for help. They dragged him to his feet and back to the Argo II. He only realised that he was being moved about halfway there.

Three years later

Hedge sat in the woods and starred at the stars. It was mindless at first, but then he saw Hercules' constellation and thought of Jason. How was the kid doing? Giving himself a break? Working hard? Had he finally beat that son of Apollo friend of his at basketball like he wanted? And Frank. Was he back to anything near his normal self? Was his centurion thing okay? How was his mandarin coming along? Any news from New Rome about his university application?

Gods, he kept wondering.

Two months later

Reforming the fauns was a terrible job and Hedge spent most of his time at New Rome doing it. Still, he was glad to see the kids. Frank was doing okay- fluent now. Jason was starting to read in English, so that was good. He had tons of trouble with the 'J' and 'U' since those two letters didn't exist in the Latin alphabet (they were replaced by 'i' or 'v', Hedge had nearly hit him the first few times he'd spelled his name 'IASON'), and he kept pronouncing words with 'e's weird.

Then he heard news about camp and he had to stop himself from asking the legionnaires to repeat it. Had Percy done something stupid? What about Leo- had the forge caught on fire or collapsed or had a gas leak again? Had Annabeth finally gotten her building plans approved for the temple?

Gods, he kept wondering.

Five Years Later

Short and sweet ceremony so that there could be a quick move-on to the dancing and the open bar.

Percy and Annabeth knew how to do this.

Mortals, demigods and even a handful of gods (let's face it-all the gods) were weaving around the dance floor and little tables where people sat and sipped champagne or Diet Coke (specially selected for Mr D- who had been dragged into a suit and attendance by Chiron).

Finally Grover took the mic.

"It appears that the photographer's wife is in labour so we get them back sooner than expected," he said. "Ladies and Gentlemen, Lords and Ladies, please welcome Percy and Annabeth Chase-Jackson!"

There was polite wedding-appropriate clapping and then whooping and cheering, wolf-whistling and dirty comments- staple of demigod celebrations.

It was funny because Percy's button-down white shirt whose sleeves were rolled up by this point, and Annabeth's plain and short white dress could have been called casual wear- but you could tell that Annabeth was dressed up on account that she was wearing a dress and that Percy was because there were buttons on his clothes. It was the epitome of class as far as these two were concerned.

People gathered around the dance floor, children of Hermes hit the deck to peer at the scene from between people's legs.

Percy and Annabeth's clutched hands were swinging as they took their place in the center. Will Solace fiddled with the console before an old Jason Mraz song took off and they started dancing. It wasn't slow, it wasn't quick. It was actually kind of perfect for them. That middle section between the party that their wedding was shaping up to be (since before it was even announced) and the realisation that they had gotten to the point where there was a wedding. Annabeth's head stayed on Percy's shoulder for the entire dance and Percy's arms around her looked more like a hug than anything.

Hedge shook his head. He couldn't believe his eyes. He'd seen these kids go to hell, literally, and make it out alive whispering each other's names. He'd heard them call to each other in wars. He'd heard them yelling at each other at camp, before and after hooking up. It was good to hear them say each other's names quietly, lovingly and in the midst of wedding vows.

"Guess you can't worry about chastity anymore, Coach," Leo peeped up from next to him.

Wedding vows… Gods they'd grown up. And Hedge couldn't even pretend to be surprised. Nobody could.

"Shut up Valdez, I can do what I want," Hedge said. It came out as a sniffle.

"Are you crying Coach?" Leo asked.

"No Valdez I'm not crying."

"Oh. 'Cause everyone else is. Percy's wedding sure is hitting the water works."

Hedge made him do push-ups for that pun once the first dance was over.

Six Years Later

Leo's hands were shaking as they clung his diploma.

"Way the go," Jason said clapping him on the back. Leo's entire body was shaking. He was starring at his diploma, at the engineer's ring on his finger.

"I did it," he said. "I actually did it."

"You did, Leo," Annabeth said touching his elbow.

Leo shook his head, looking about ready to cry.

"Nobody thought I ever would," Leo said. "'Cause I'm Latino and poor, 'cause my mom's gone, 'cause I'm me…"

"Oh, kid," Hedge said. "We knew you'd do it."

"And look at you," Jason said. "A mechanical engineer."

Leo played with the ring on his finger. "My mom had one of these."

That was his breaking point.

However the reason why he ended up in Hedge's arms, that was another story.

Nine years later

Piper clung to Frank for a long time, her eyes watery. Hormones were messing with her good. Worse than anyone had anticipated and could probably handle. Sheesh.

"You be careful," Piper said.

"Sure thing, boss," Frank said. He let go of her.

"I got everyone?" He asked. He was all dressed up in desert camouflage, ready to go. Soldiers were hugging their relatives across the airports- except most of them were more directly related, and they hadn't driven up to Ottawa from the states just to say goodbye- pregnant, newly made parents or no.

"Yeah," Jason said. "Think so."

"You missed me, kid," Hedge said gruffly. If everyone simply looked surprised, Frank was downright stunned. But he walked into Hedge's outstretched arms.

"Take care of yourself," Hedge said. He added quietly. "Remember not to do anything stupid. She'd want you safe. And by 'she' you can pick if I mean Hazel or your mom."

Frank tensed. But after a while he just whispered back, "Okay. But can you do something for me?"

He put something wrapped in a piece of red silk in Coach's hand.

Coach patted his back and pushed him away. It was funny. When he was a kid he'd thought about joining the army despite being a centaur. Since he couldn't he'd just become one of the most violent seekers ever, according to the council. Now that Frank was walking right back into the line of fire… he was getting chills. Goddamn chills.

Ten Years Later

Hedge had had to threaten to staple Jason to the waiting room chair to make him stop pacing.

"They don't usually kick people out of the room, do they?" Jason asked.

"Don't ask me, kid," Hedge said.

Jason passed a hand through his hair. He'd been letting it grow more and more since leaving the fort.

"What if something went wrong?" Jason said. "What if one of those one-in-a-million freak complications..."

"I don't think so," Hedge said. "I'd know."

"Yeah?" Jason asked half-heartedly.

"Yeah," Hedge said. "I've been hanging out with you cupcakes for too long."

Jason held his head in his hands.

"Hey," he said punching Jason in the shoulder. "It'll be okay. She'll be fine, ditto for the babies."

"I hope," Jason said. "But even if they are, then what? Then what am I supposed to do?"

"What do you mean 'what are you supposed to do'?" Hedge said. "Go back in there, see your wife and child, and expect to get punched by her."

"Coach," Jason complained. "I mean… I mean…"

He wrung his fingers in his hair. "Coach, I'm going to be a Dad."

"That's the point, cupcake."

"No, Coach," Jason said. "How? How do you do that? How do you do that well? Because… because I want to do it well. But what do dads do? How protective do I have to be? At what age am I supposed to allow the kid to get a piercing? Or am I just supposed to eternally say no? What if I can't change diapers? I don't know any lullabies that aren't Latin or about massacres. When do kids start playing video games? What are the signs of an allergic reaction? How hot is too hot for bottles? I should know these things but I don't because I've never seen what a dad does and nobody's ever thought that maybe one day it'd happen to me. But I don't want to be like mine, mine sucks, but I really don't know."

Hedge took Jason's fingers out of his hair.

"You know what," Hedge said. "You're being one dramatic guy. Toughen up Grace. You'll be alright. You think I haven't seen you take care of people in real life? You're a natural. You'll get it as you go. That's the secret Grace, everyone does. Do you honestly think that Piper would be onboard if she didn't think that you'd be the best dad her kid could get? She'd have noped the fetuses out of creation. We all believe in you except for you, and it's about time that that changed. You hear me, Grace? About time."

Jason still looked completely lost.

Hedge sighed.

"I don't have kids," Hedge sighed. "But from what I understand, when you've got one, you're supposed to watch over them. Help them make choices. Be there for the big moments and the little ones. Do your best. Teach them what they need to know about the world and fun fact for cocktail parties. Listen to them."

"So do what you did? Got it," Jason said with a sigh. He still looked just as nervous, but he'd certainly shut up Hedge.

Fifteen Years Later

Charlotte was bouncing on Nico's knees. Chantale had waddled in, told him to supervise his daughter even if he had company, and had waddled out.

"The thing is," Nico said. "I don't… I don't want a second kid."

"Have you looked at your wife recently, di Angelo?" Hedge asked. "It's a little late to think of it that way."

"I know," Nico said. "Well, I do want another kid, like… geez, another Charlotte-like being…"

At the sound of her name, the two year old made a sound like a squawk. Human babies were weird. Hedge had observed them for extended periods of time, and he hadn't been able to find any other alternative explanation.

"di Angelo, I'm lost here," Hedge said. "You want another kid. I've seen the way you look at Chantale and Charlotte. You love them both, and you've been into this right until, like, twenty minutes ago. What's wrong?"

Nico's energy drained out of him.

"The new baby's a girl."

"Okay? You wanted a son?" Hedge asked. "I know that Percy was kind of devastated, but he was okay once Marianna popped out."

"No. It means… It means that Charlotte gets a sister."

"Oh," Hedge said. "Oh…"

Nico looked away. Charlotte squawked again (wasn't that birds? Were humans not supposed to talk?) and Nico slung her over his shoulder. She giggled.

"Nico…" Hedge said.

"You saw me after Hazel died," Nico said. No, actually. Coach hadn't. That had kind of been the point. Nico had dropped off the grid for a few weeks. Well, months. It'd been terrifying, and when he'd come back he'd looked like a wax figure that had melted in the sun. That's how badly he'd degenerated. "I was just as bad if not worst when Bianca died. I loved them both, Coach. That's what sisters do. They make you love them."

"Yeah, and breaking your heart isn't in the job description," Hedge said. "It's just… it's what happened to you."

"I don't want it happening to this one," Nico said as Charlotte looped her arms around his neck. He kissed her cheek and rested his cheek against her hair. It was light, just like her mother's. She'd gotten nothing but dark eyes from Nico, and even then, hers managed to shine. Light in the darkness, so to speak.

"And it won't," Hedge said. "Not if you're around to watch them. Your family's going to be okay, di Angelo. Just stop worrying and go back to being excited. Seriously what are you going to do with three girls in the house?"

Nico grinned.

Sixteen Years Later

Hedge paused in the middle of the toy store to attempt to get his bearings. He glanced at his list.

Marianna

Lily

Jaime

Laurel

Parker

Charlotte

Corrine

Something girly for Laurel and Lily (gods knew where they'd gotten those genetics out of Piper and Jason- but wandering up the Barbie aisle for a few minutes usually resulted in finding something for them), some kind of whale or shark or dolphin plush-type thing for Marianna (it was stereotypical but too bad, it worked).

Jaime was still into trains according to the last update (yesterday), Parker was four so a ball that wasn't a hand-me-down from his brother would make his day. Nothing too high-tech for Charlotte since she'd taken to eating things, and something that made noise for Corrine because at her age that's what kids loved.

And with that, he set off for Christmas shopping.

Seventeen Years Later

Chantale, another bun in the oven as if Charlotte and Corinne weren't handfuls enough, plopped down the baby in Hedge's arm.

"Who's that, Co?" She asked. "Eh? Who's that?"

"Grandpa Two," Corinne said quietly.

Hedge was caught back. He tolerated the nickname from Marianna, Lily and Jaime- and ergo couldn't blame Laurel and Parker for having been rubbed-off on. But Corinne?

"Hey cupcake," Hedge told Corinne as she clung to his shirt and starred over his shoulder.

Nineteen Years Later

Hedge put the phone down.

Jackson.

Hellhound.

Behind.

What.

Hedge moved the phone back to its charger and starred at it.

And gods of Olympus did he bawl.

He couldn't help but remember Annabeth's plain white wedding dress- the only time he'd ever seen her in a dress. She was wearing a plain black dress now, and it just seemed like a cruel twist of the knife.

Everything seemed like a cruel twist on life.

Flowers on the coffin.

The coffin.

The fact that the coffin was empty since Percy had been buried like all other heroes at camp, it was just a front for the mortals and a revival for the rest.

The fact that there was a stone marking the coffin which meant that you couldn't kid yourself and think no Jackson didn't go and die, he's not getting buried right there. A Greek quote about sailors always returning to the sea was on his stone- Hedge couldn't remember if Annabeth or his mom had chosen it. Whatever, Hedge had hoped that it was true.

Marianna clinging to his arm because even she, at age ten (the epitome of double-digit-inaugurated cool until now), could realise that her mother was not the one to go to for comfort at the moment.

The fact that it was cold so the mood just sunk even further than it already had.

Hedge thought back about fifty years, to what Chiron had told him.

You get attached to kids, you really do.

After entrusting Marianna to a very composed and warm Aunt Reyna and Cousin Sofia and Camila, Hedge went to find Chiron in the crowd, ripping off his tie as he weaved through mourners.

"I so wish that you hadn't been right," he said.

Chiron smiled sadly, not even having to ask what about.

"I always wish I'm wrong about so many things," Chiron said. "I really do."