Aljan Moonfire does not own Naruto or Bleach.

Chapter 4: The Bell Test

"So how will you be doing this, Naruto?" his Zanpakuto asked curiously, leaning on the ledge of the giant window of the Hokage office. When the boy didn't immediately answer, he turned away from the partly cloudy sky of the mindscape to look at him.

The boy was sitting cross-legged in the comfortable chair behind the Hokage's desk. He had pulled the chair close to the desk and leaned one arm on it, his head resting on his fist as he turned slightly to look at his Zanpakuto.

"I'm not quite sure yet…" the blond half-hummed thoughtfully.

As his wielder pondered his decision, the blade wondered slightly, as he always did, at not making such decisions himself. The part of him that still clung to Ichigo's independent mindset protested at the lack of personal action. Of course, the part of him that was all hollow protested at anything and everything, so he did his best to ignore it – all his hollow side wanted to do was fight, and play with opponents like a cat does a mouse.

The part of him that was most prominent at the moment though, was the mentality of what had once been Zangetsu. Zangetsu had been a Zanpakuto for a very long time. He wouldn't have seen anything odd in not being the one to make decisions – in fact he may have even disliked being the one to do so. As Ichigo's Zanpakuto he had acted as more of a guide than anything else – and even then he'd taken a very hands-off approach until that final battle with Aizen.

It was in a Zanpakuto's nature to see themselves as a weapon, or rather, something to be wielded. As a result most of them are very passive aggressive, and really only release any particularly violent emotions they feel in battle. Of course, they all had their own personalities, but their reactions were more a reflection of what their user's might be in a similar situation than anything else – after all, they were just parts of the same soul.\.

But the relationship between Naruto and his soul slayer was something rather different from that conventional relationship. It had taken quite some time before the zanpakuto had truly come to understand what the Shinigami had meant when they first met over a decade ago, and what it meant for his own personality.

When Ichigo's soul had entirely and profoundly altered itself in order to handle the influx of power from the Final Getsuga, it had transcended itself, taking all of the parts of Ichigo's soul and seamlessly merging them into an entirely singular being. When it really came down to it, most of his current persona had been formed through a series of strange internal compromises between the three sides of his former personality.

What the hollow side had hated, Ichigo loved, and Zangetsu was neutral on, the new Zanpakuto was also neutral on. What two sides of him had hated, and one side of him had been neutral on, he rather disliked. What one side of him had loved, and the other two sides of him had been mostly apathetic of, he loved with nearly an equal fervor.

To give an example, Ichigo had loved all of his friends and family in a nearly desperate fashion. He would – and did – give everything he was or could have been to protect them. However, his hollow side had hated them almost as much. More often than not he'd viewed Ichigo's tight attachment to them as a weakness. Had they ever betrayed Ichigo, or died themselves, it was likely the only thing that really could have broken him. Zangetsu had also acknowledged this danger, but it was usually when Ichigo was happy and surrounded by his friends that the rain of his inner world had ceased, or lightened, at least a bit. As a result his opinion hovered around a slightly positive neutral.

Ichigo and his hollow would have torn apart the new soul with their feelings on the matter had they not been able to find a compromise. The developing personality had found its solution in Ichigo's sisters. They were young enough, and weak enough, to not be a physical threat to him, and precious enough to Ichigo that he could unreservedly project his need to protect through just them.

Unfortunately, this meant that everyone else Ichigo had known and come to befriend really weren't missed at all, including Rukia and his own father. It would be like missing a stranger that had lived next door for a week before moving on. He knew their names and maybe a few things about them if he were especially friendly, and that's it; there was zero emotional attachment.

But what all this really meant was that even though the zanpakuto had all of Ichigo, Zangetsu, and the hollow's memories, and even many of their instinctive urges and skills, he wasn't any of them anymore.

He had become someone – something - else entirely.

The one most immediately relevant result of this – thought not necessarily the most important, by any means - was that while he could easily act as a zanpakuto to one with sufficient spiritual pressure and no soul blade of their own, he was far from being a part of said person's soul. So, instinctive communication was out of the question. If he wanted to know something about his wielder's actions, he had to ask.

It could be very annoying to one used to an instinctive symmetry in such things though. Shaking himself out of his thoughts, he reminded himself that he had to be patient. He was immortal now – just as, perhaps even more then, the Kyuubi had once been – and he was only stuck here until Naruto died; then he'd be free.

The Shinigami King had promised.

And if there was one thing he had completely retained from Ichigo's hollow, it was an unquenchable desire to be free of anything that might hold him back. But for now he had mostly resigned himself to the situation, and was generally content to complete his task and serve as the blond boy's zanpakuto.

Turning his attention back to his young wielder, the zanpakuto saw him open his mouth to speak, "I suppose," said Naruto, "it will mostly depend on my teammates and sensei. Hmm…but, then again… No; never mind." He seemed to be thinking out loud now, "I'll have to be sure to keep quite a bit back from the banshee; I don't really trust her at all. Sasuke will likely be okay once some of that arrogance is pounded out of his skull though. As for Hatake… Well, he was Dad's student, so I'll judge on that end once I meet him." On finishing he glanced at his sword/mentor/friend for approval and got the crinkle around the eyes that indicated a slight smile and a supporting nod in response.

Nodding to himself to confirm his own resolve on the course of action, Naruto sat back and pushed away from the desk. Once standing he tilted his face upwards and spread his hands, and tensed slightly.

And then he vanished with a slight shimmer, thinking, 'Here goes nothing…'

Hatake Kakashi had arrived.

.-.

To one Haruno Sakura, the arrival of Team 7's jounin sensei was nowhere near as anticipated – unless, of course, one counted her intense desire to pound him into the ground for wasting her time. She had much more important things to be doing today! She could gossiping about Sasuke with the OUSFC (The Official Uchiha Sasuke Fan Club™), or tending to her Sasuke Shrine, or, or, well, something important like that.

- Shannaro! - Inner Sakura shouted, in complete agreement for once. – When he gets here I'll kill 'im! – she declared, perfectly serious.

Sakura carefully ignored the voice in her head, (only slightly thankful that it didn't have any company up there) as always, and turned her attention from glaring at the closed door to sighing at Sasuke's coolness. The only good thing about being stuck here for hours on end was that she was stuck here with him.

She only reluctantly turned her attention away from him once more as the door slowly slid open. The man who slouched through was tall – maybe around six feet – though that could have just been the hair, which was silver and stuck straight up in the air for what had to be a least half a foot. He had his hitai-ate tilted to cover his left eye and his entire lower face was covered by a fabric face mask, leaving only a single half-lidded grey eye to glance over the classroom. Other than that he seemed to be dressed much like any other jounin.

He had a lazy, apathetic look in that one visible eye that seemed to take her measure in a single glance and then nearly dismiss her out of hand.

Inner Sakura scowled, but for once didn't say (scream) anything.

.-.

Hatake Kakashi on the other hand, was entirely indifferent to what minor annoyance the not-yet-genin might hold against him. He wasn't late after all; he'd just gotten a bit side-tracked. And if they asked -

"You're late." That it was the Uchiha who'd said something, rather than the apparent fangirl screeching it – and they wonder why he'd failed every team he'd ever been given? – was a bit of a surprise though…

- he had an excellent excuse. "Sorry," he wasn't sorry at all actually, but they didn't need to know that. "I got lost on the road of life – surprisingly enough, there weren't any signposts."

They all just stared at him incredulously. It was almost amusing. In fact, it likely would have been, were he not longing to be almost anywhere but where he actually was.

Seeing that the pink-haired one seemed about to explode but was trying to hold her tongue, he decided to push her a bit more, just to see if she'd snap. He might as well get some entertainment out of them, even if he could already see himself failing them. He took a careful second to brace himself for the sight of the mini-Minato-sensei in the corner – why the hell had he grown out his bangs like that? It made practically their only differences his longer hair and the whisker marks… – before taking a long, apathetic look at all of them, and sighing exaggeratedly.

"And my first impression of you all… well, to be blunt, I don't like you already."

Mostly because there were more important things he could be doing, like re-repotting Mr. Uki (the one tiny plant in his apartment), or feeding his dogs. He would have been horrified to know how much his thoughts resembled those of the pink-haired-one only moments before he'd opened the door – though with a thankfully distinct lack of anything Sasuke-related.

As Sakura finally opened her mouth to screech, he continued over whatever she was about to yell, "So, meet me on the roof in ten minutes." 'That should give me enough time to read the rest of chapter ten again…' the quiet, perverted giggle that escaped his mask was thankfully drowned out by the erupting smoke of a generic shunshin.

.-.

Naruto was amused.

Unlike his teammates, he could clearly see that Kakashi was trying to infuriate them. (Actually, it wasn't them in particular; Naruto just had yet to discover that this was how Kakashi treated everyone who wasn't a direct superior.) The seemingly purposeful lateness, the insults, the indifference to their opinions… As far as he was concerned, it was hilarious, especially his teammate's reactions. He might have to try it himself sometime. It made for an awesome prank…

They had made it to the roof within a few minutes, rather than the ten he had given them, to find their new sensei perched on the railing of the roof. Naruto had quickly plopped down on the stairs in front of him with only a split second of hesitation, and the banshee – he was pretty sure her name was Sakura now – and Sasuke – who he had decided to call simply the gloomy bastard during the long wait for their sensei - had followed his example after a few meaningless minutes of waiting for Kakashi to acknowledge them.

Said man, quite obviously, didn't. He seemed perfectly content to ignore them and read his little orange book. Though Naruto did have to wonder, was the man trying to make Sakura quite literally explode by reading porn in front of her? With how red her face was getting he half expected her to at any moment – and that's not even mentioning how horribly the flushed color clashed with her hair.

Soon enough though, the man finally snapped his book closed and carefully placed it in an inside pocket of his jounin vest. "Well," He began, "Let's start off with introductions. You know, likes, dislikes, dreams, hobbies…stuff like that." He shrugged carelessly.

Sakura, having mostly calmed down since Kakashi had put the porn away, fidgeted nervously before realizing that neither of her teammates were going to say anything in response. Still not wanting to go first though, she looked up at the jounin and said, weirdly shy, "Well, we know the least about you…so, how about you go first, sensei?"

"Me?" he replied almost sarcastically. He sighed before saying, in an almost complete monotone, "Well, my name's Hatake Kakashi. I have absolutely no desire to tell you anything about my likes and dislikes. Dreams… Hmm… Well, I do have a lot of hobbies."

Naruto hid a smile as Sakura's eyebrow twitched with annoyance and the gloomy bastard failed to hide a similar reaction. He could almost hear them thinking it; 'So he told us… absolutely nothing..?'

"Now," Kakashi said, breaking into their thoughts, "It's your turn. Let's start with you, pinky."

Sakura's eyebrow twitched again angrily - 'Pinky..?' – but she shook it off quickly enough as her thoughts turned to her answers. She flushed softly and let her eyes trail over to the stoic boy beside her. "My name is Haruno Sakura." She introduced herself softly. "The thing I like…well, the person I like is – " She glanced at Sasuke again and muffled a squeal of excitement. "And, umm, my dream for the future…well," she actually did squeal this time. Sasuke flinched reflexively at the sound and, noticing it, Naruto muffled another laugh.

Giving a light cough in an effort to regain her composure, she soon continued, "What I dislike… Ino-bunta," she scowled here at the thought of her supposed rival, "and Naruto." She glared at the other boy on her team, remembering what had happened earlier that morning.

Eventually she turned her mind from it though, and continued. "And my hobbies…" she looked at Sasuke again, and giggled rather creepily. The rest of them filled in the blank with at least one certainty. 'Her hobby is stalking me/the Uchiha/the gloomy bastard.' Said boy shuddered uneasily.

Kakashi rolled his eyes and gave a light cough to bring their attention back to him. "Next is you," he pointed at Sasuke, "the brooding one."

The dark-haired boy scowled further at the description, but didn't respond to it. Looking over his folded hands at his new instructor he eventually replied in a stoic monotone, "My name is Uchiha Sasuke. There are lots of things I dislike, and I don't really like much of anything. And...I won't call it dream, but I have an ambition; the resurrection of my clan and to kill a certain man."

They all had a different reaction to this announcement.

'So cool…' Sakura had hearts fluttering around her head. All she'd heard was the part about the resurrection of his clan, and she knew she could most certainly help him out with that. Cue creepy fangirl giggle.

'As I thought…' Kakashi frowned seriously. That might be a problem… If he passes them, which was seeming more and more unlikely by the minute.

Naruto on the other hand, had lost all amusement at the bastard's announcement. 'He must mean…'

'Yeah, I'd say he's talking about his brother.' His Zanpakuto murmured.

Naruto frowned thoughtfully.

"Ok." Kakashi clapped his hands together, bringing their gazes back to him. "And lastly, blondie – it's your turn."

Naruto sighed and lifted his hand to adjust the hitai-ate tied around his neck, thinking on what to say. "…My name's Uzumaki Naruto. I like ramen, and my sword. I dislike the three minutes it takes for instant ramen to boil and bigoted, stick-up-the-ass bastards."

'Aka, most of this damn village – though I'll be changing that eventually,' he carefully did not say.

"My dream is to become the greatest Hokage this village has ever seen, and surpass all the ones that came before me." He smirked slightly at the surprise on the faces of his new teammates and thought, 'Especially you, Dad.'

He, quite honestly, didn't really do much in his free time besides train, but… "My hobbies…sleeping, I'd say." He shrugged and added, "And training."

Finally managing to look straight on at the boy, Kakashi almost wished he hadn't. The boy was almost an exact clone of his father, from the tips of his blond hair to soles of his feet. But the real reason for the sentiment was that once he did, he realized he'd never be able to look away again, not really. He'd never be able to push this boy off as someone else's responsibility again.

He'd been too young, he had other responsibilities, he didn't want to look at a face that was practically the spit of his old sensei… His excuses had been endless, and the inference of certain members of the Council had made the boy even easier to push from his thoughts, but in that moment even he couldn't bring himself to believe them in the slightest. He refused to allow himself to acknowledge why that was right now, in front of the little genin no less, but it was there all the same.

And Kakashi made a resolution, right then, if only to himself. Even if he did end up failing this team, he'd find a way to teach Naruto something somehow. He owed his sensei at least that much, and seeing the shadows in the boy's eyes – the kind of shadows he'd never wanted to see in the eyes of his sensei's child – he knew he already had a lot to make up for.

He'd thought, rather abstractedly, about paying some extra attention to Sasuke, being as he was the last of Obito's relatives, but as much as he hated to admit it, he owed much more to his sensei than to the boy who'd been on his team for less than a year before he'd died. Naturally, he did owe Obito – he'd been the catalyst; the one that had made him realize that the people around him, the people he was supposed to be protecting, were just as – if not more – important than any mission could be. But…Namikaze Minato had been a father, a brother, a sensei and everything in between to him since – and even before - his father had…had died.

Even though Obito had been the catalyst, his jounin-sensei had been everything else. And he'd only been fifteen years old when the Kyuubi had attacked and taken his sensei away from him as well.

He owed a debt, one he had always subconsciously acknowledged, one that he could never really pay back; one that he'd never even had the chance to try to. He'd do as much as he could for the young shinobi before him though, in order to repay as much as he was capable of. Blinking slowly at the blond boy, he smiled slightly, though the emotion was completely hidden by the mask from those around him.

'He's certainly grown in an interesting way…' Kakashi thought nostalgically. 'Hokage…huh?'

Jerking his head slightly to inconspicuously shake off his thoughts, the jounin brought his hands together in a swift clap that was only slightly muffled by his finger-less gloves. "Since I suppose that finishes up introductions, tomorrow we'll start our shinobi duties," he began.

"What kind of duties." It didn't sound even remotely like the question it should have been, but Sasuke didn't withdraw it when Kakashi glanced at him, faintly annoyed by the interruption.

"First, we're going to do something together; just the four of us…" he continued, as if the Uchiha hadn't said anything at all. A hint of malignant humor tinted his dark grey eye, and Naruto frowned, finally becoming slightly annoyed by the man's efforts to draw things out. The boy refused to give him the satisfaction of actually showing it though.

Sakura had nowhere near his amount of patience though, and she finally blurted out, "What?!"

"Survival training."

Once again it was Sakura who responded, "Survival training?" she asked, annoyance and bewilderment coating her voice and expression. "Why is our first task training? We did enough of that at the academy."

The malicious laughter in his gaze still hadn't disappeared, and he replied, "This won't be normal training. I will be your opponent." He chuckled slightly, as if unable to hold it back anymore.

"What's so funny sensei?" Sakura asked, unnerved, though she never admit it, especially with Sasuke sitting right next to her.

Kakashi's eye curved up in what might have been a smile before saying, "Well…it's just that when I tell you this you'll seriously freak out."

"Freak out?" Sasuke's eyebrow twitched at this; as if he'd ever 'freak out'.

Seeing that they were unconvinced, Kakashi leaned forward slightly, leaking a slight amount of killing intent into the air; just enough to make the atmosphere more menacing. "Of the 27 graduates," he finally said, "only nine will be chosen to become genin. The rest will be sent back to the academy." He gestured at them pointedly and arched his only visible brow. "The 'training' is actually an extremely difficult post-academy exam with a failure rate of over 66%." He declared.

Sakura's jaw dropped and Sasuke's eyes bulged slightly in shock. Naruto himself frowned, grimacing uncomfortably at the knowledge of the failure rate. The jounin may have been exaggerating but he somehow doubted it was by much.

This…could be a problem.

He glanced at his teammates.

Yeah…definitely a problem.

.-.

The next day…

Naruto woke early the next day, though not through any purposeful effort on his part – he'd killed the latest in a long series of alarm clocks last week – and rose quickly. Not even ten minutes later he was dressed, armed, and out the door, his zanpakuto settled comfortably on his back and five rapidly devoured cups of instant ramen settling comfortably in his stomach. If Kakashi actually thought he'd be following that particular suggestion, he was nuts.

He got to the training ground a good half hour before anyone else got there, and set the small pack of trapping supplies he'd brought with him on the ground. Once he made sure that no one else – that he could sense anyway – was there, he quickly made a few shadow clones to survey the area as he removed everything from ninja wire to smoke bombs and quickly passed half of them to the only clone that had stayed behind. Soon enough the bag was empty, his own arms were also full of caltrops and kunai, and his scouting clones had finally dispelled.

He smirked at the exact copy of himself. "You know what to do."

It nodded, and silently blurred out of existence in one direction as Naruto moved to set up a few more basic traps around the clearing itself, hoping as he did so that this extra insurance wouldn't be needed for whatever Kakashi had planned. He had a feeling it would though, so he quickly set to work.

Soon enough, Naruto had disappeared as thoroughly as his clone, leaving behind only the empty, slightly shabby, pale yellow backpack as a sign that he'd ever been there in the first place.

By the time his teammates joined him on the training ground, the bag had somehow vanished and he was seemingly asleep, leaning against the back of one of the training posts. Sasuke took note of this, but ultimately dismissed it out of hand.

Sakura never even noticed, seeing as Sasuke had arrived before her.

.-.

"Hey guys. Good morning."

"YOU'RE LATE!"

As Sasuke and Kakashi blinked dazedly at Sakura, temporarily deafened by the sheer volume, Naruto, who had been woken by his zanpakuto at the arrival of the jounin, stood and stretched. Turning, he took note of Kakashi and Sasuke's stunned expressions and Sakura's hard breathing and came to a very accurate conclusion of what had happened. He was suddenly very grateful for his earplugs when Sakura then turned on him as well.

"AND WHEN DID YOU GET HERE!"

He blinked lazily at her anger-twisted face and soundlessly screaming lips. "I'm sorry, did you say something?" he asked, deadpan. Then he turned his attention to Kakashi, who was suddenly perfectly fine. Inwardly, the scarecrow was beaming with a kind of pride, even if he hadn't actually taught the blond anything yet.

Sasuke finally began to recover himself when the jounin removed his own pack and dug around in it for a moment before pulling out an alarm clock, of all things. "This is set to go off at noon, two hours from now." The Cyclops said. (Incidentally, Naruto had gotten there at seven-thirty, a half hour before he'd told them to meet.)

Kakashi then pulled two gently chiming bells on strings from his right pocket. "And here's two bells. You have until noon to take these from me. Anyone who can't get a bell from me, won't be getting lunch, and I'll not only tie you to one of those stumps," he pointed at the suddenly menacing trio of training posts, the center of which Naruto had been sleeping against earlier, "I'll eat your lunch right in front of you."

Sasuke and Sakura's stomachs growled loudly, seemingly despairing at the announcement, and Naruto got a couple of accusing stares from them when his didn't make a sound. He scratched his cheek with a finger, shrugging. "…I had a big dinner last night," he lied, suddenly even more grateful than usual for the ramen he'd eaten earlier that morning.

Sakura seemed to accept the pronouncement easily enough, but Sasuke just scowled deeper. If it was because he'd caught the lie or was just constipated was anyone's guess though. Kakashi raised a skeptical eyebrow and coughed lightly. Their attention was immediately focused on him again. "Anyway…you will only need to get one bell, but there are only two to begin with so one of you will definitely be tied to a post. And…" the silver haired man's visible eye narrowed, "that same person, who doesn't get that bell, fails. So, one of you will be sent back to the academy as well."

They all gulped; some obviously – Sakura seemed to be shaking slightly as well – and some less obtrusively – Sasuke's scowl only deepened.

Kakashi's eye relaxed slightly then, returning back to its characteristic apathy as he continued. "You can use anything you want in this exercise," he began, his voice lingering mockingly over the last word, as if this were a game rather than something that could determine the course of the rest of their lives. "Kunai, shuriken," he eyed katana slung over the back of his blond prospective student and thought of the kodachi that that he hadn't seriously used since his Anbu days, but had brought along just in case the kid was skilled enough with his own sword that kunai wouldn't suffice, "swords, jutsu…but you won't succeed unless you come at me with the intent to kill."

They were all silent for a moment, a tense air thickening around them.

"All-right," he finally said after a long moment. "Begin."

.-.

"The most basic of ninja skills is the ability to hide yourself well…" Kakashi murmured, running his eyes along the edge of the forest. 'And they all seem to have hidden fairly well,' he continued in his thoughts. Sasuke and Sakura's bodies were almost completely concealed by the foliage of the forest. Considering her get up, he could spot Sakura easily, even without relying on chakra sensing. Sasuke was much better concealed, but he could sense the boy's agitated charka from where he was without any difficulty.

'Except…' Kakashi began to spread his senses wider, 'where's Naruto…?' Then, suddenly sensing someone behind him, he turned.

And there stood Naruto, not even attempting to hide. Kakashi raised an eyebrow at the blatant reveal. "You're… a little off, kid."

"So's your hair." Naruto replied matter-of-factly. "Off-white, that is."

"I noticed." Kakashi returned, deadpan, and then sighed. "You're really not taking this very seriously, are you?"

Naruto blinked in surprise. "Of course I am," he said, "But I'm not really all that good at stealth attacks, ya know? I can sneak around with the best of them, but most of my combat skills work much better face to face."

"Really?" Kakashi replied, actually feeling a bit interested, but not allowing it to show.

"Yeah. So I didn't see much point in trying to 'attack from the shadows' or whatever when it wasn't going to work anyway. You already know where the other two are, and I'm sure I wouldn't have fared all that much better, considering the difference in skill."

"Oh?" Kakashi made an interested sound, and asked, "And just how big do you think the difference in skill is?"

"In a straight up fight, there's no way I could beat you." Naruto said, certain. "But you're not asking for a straight up fight. I just need to get that damn bell. And that, I'm pretty sure I can do." He said, a smirk growing on his face, "I might need some help though."

"Are you going to go ask you teammates for help or something then?" Kakashi asked derisively, as if that was the worst thing he could think of the kid doing in this situation, but thought, 'Go then, ask them, it's the only way you stand a –'

"No." Naruto interrupted the jounin's thoughts. Kakashi frowned inwardly, a bit disappointed. "Maybe if they weren't who they are, but the banshee'd be next to useless in this situation, and the gloomy bastard would likely ignore me even if I tried." He shook his head, unaware or uncaring of the bristling of his teammates at his words. "No," he repeated, and reached up to wrap his fingers around the hilt of his sword, "This guy's all the help I need."

Kakashi, slightly confused, tensed imperceptibly at the threatening motion. Naruto drew the long katana in a smooth, effortless motion, the blade not making a sound as he slipped it from its sheath and held it before him steadily. Kakashi quickly took in the boy's grip on the sword, the positioning of his feet and thought, 'There are almost no openings in that stance,' the jounin narrowed his visible eye slightly.

However the boy had managed to learn kenjutsu – and Kakashi was suddenly very curious – he had learned well. If he were to estimate it, the sword easily pushed what might have been a genin level opponent up to at least chunin level, based the boy's own confidence in it and the near instinctive skill he held the blade with.

Kakashi only had a split-second of warning when Naruto's killing intent rose sharply before Naruto was, quite abruptly, right before his swiftly widening eye, almost hovering in midair as time seemed to slow, his blade raised one handedly over his head to begin a violent downwards motion that would undoubtedly split open Kakashi skull were it to make direct contact.

Then it was Naurto's eyes that widened as almost before he could even begin the attack, Kakashi was suddenly gone. Continuing the motion as if he were unable to react in time to the rapid movement of the jounin, he broadened his own senses in an attempt to detect the other shinobi's position. He landed almost silently and immediately ducked beneath the kick that would have at least broken a rib had it connected properly before turning on the balls of his feet to bring his blade up in a deadly diagonal motion that would have carved into Kakashi's torso had he not drawn back in time.

As it was, it just slipped by his side, and missed slicing off the string of one of the bells by less than an inch. Catching the near miss out of the corner of his eye, Kakashi rapidly moved back even further, quickly putting a few feet between himself and his prospective student.

"Ah~h" Naruto smiled almost sheepishly, but didn't make any indication of lowering his guard as he stood. "Just missed it."

Kakashi narrowed his eyes in response, his mind working furiously to analyze the last few seconds. Just missed it? Indeed. Had he been less skilled he would have been completely taken off guard by the unnaturally fast movements – movements that could have only been powered by some kind of chakra technique. But Kakashi hadn't sensed a single chakra spike while or before he moved. Either Naruto was suddenly as skilled at concealing the chakra within his body as he was, or that unreal speed was completely natural – both were rather unlikely, to say the least, but there could be no other explanation.

Then Naruto was gone again, and once more Kakashi just barely managed to dodge a strike that almost managed to take one of his limbs. The katana flew through the air, twisting on a dime to follow up with an attempt at the major artery on the inside of Kakashi's right leg. Just as Kakashi shifted to avoid the swift strike, Naruto changed targets, once again aiming for the bells.

Naruto was suddenly enveloped in a puff of smoke as he made contact. Emerging on the other side of the smoke, he turned back as it dispelled to see that instead of the string or Kakashi he had sliced clean through a log the size of said man's torso.

"As I thought," Kakashi said from his new position closer to the woods, "It'd be useless to try and counter that sword with a normal weapon." He cursed inwardly. His kodachi would be next to useless here, and kunai an even worse option. With the limits he had put on himself for this test, the best he could do was dodge and attempt to counter with taijutsu occasionally. He then cocked his head slightly to his right, suspicion beginning to color his voice, "I can't help but wonder how you got your hands on a blade of such quality."

Naruto narrowed his eyes at the tone and replied after a moment, "…He was a gift."

"…He?"

Naruto smirked. "Mugetsu is more than just a sword, you know."

"Moonless…Sky?"

Naruto raised his blade again, and tilted it slightly. Kakashi suddenly noticed that the wider back of the single edged blade didn't glimmer in the sunlight the way the rest of the sword did. It was a deep, mysterious black, and for the life of him, he didn't know how it was possible for the sword to be forged to look like that.

"It's a bit overkill to use his real power for a test like this though. Maybe if you were actually fighting back…"

Kakashi, distracted, suddenly realized that Naruto had disappeared again and just barely sensed the spike killing intent at his back before he managed to duck away from the strike. Eyes wide, he had to rely on sheer instinct to dodge the next attack, as well as the one after it, and the one after that. Unbelievably, the boy had somehow managed to speed up even more, enough so that Kakashi was beginning to have serious trouble following his movements without the assistance of his sharingan.

"…then I might have to expend some more effort."

'How is this possible? I might be able to understand what he's doing if I…but I can't take that out,' the man thought as he ducked beneath another strike, and swayed to the side just in time to avoid the follow up, '…but seriously…are those idiots at the academy blind? Why was this kid the dead last again…?!'

Still hidden in what might have been an advantageous spot had he not been completely frozen in shock, Sasuke was having similar thoughts. He had thought the day before in the classroom that maybe the other boy might eventually prove enough of a challenge to be termed a kind of rival, but this was ridiculous.

Sakura was similarly stunned speechless. She had been beyond proud to get the top kunoichi spot of the graduating class. It meant that she was the 'best girl' to match Sasuke's 'strongest boy'. She hadn't given much thought to the idiot that would inevitably be matched up with them, and only assumed that he was bound to be much less skilled than her if he was the dead last.

But…he wasn't. Despite all appearances to the contrary, Sakura did possess some common sense and, when Sasuke wasn't involved, was actually rather smart. And Naruto was clearly more skilled than her – was a better ninja than her, despite being at the bottom of the class. If he had been so badly miss-ranked, then what did that say about her? Was her top-ranking a mistake as well..?

She didn't know what to think…and it suddenly seemed as if her whole view of the world was teetering precariously. One more nudge, and it might just flip over on itself entirely.

Though Sasuke and Sakura had enough time to be stunned speechless, Kakashi didn't have such a luxury. Even if he had said 'come at me with the intent to kill', this was just absurd. And, just as he thought the boy might be slowing down – what genin has enough stamina to keep up such a pace indefinitely? – just as the boy seemed to pause for a moment…

It was as if time had come to a standstill.

He could still see the genin before him, crouched low, grip on his sword firm and confident as he held it to his side, but he was also simultaneously aware of the suddenly much shorter white strings fluttering uselessly in the wind at his hip and the light tinkle of two bells clinking together behind him.

"Wha..?"

Then the boy in front of him shivered and disappeared with a slight shimmer and without a sound, and he realized, 'An after image? There's no way–'

"Gotcha that time."

Kakashi swung around to see Naruto standing behind him, sword still poised in the ending stance of the impossibly fast battoujutsu that he had just swept by the jounin with, though one hand had since been removed from the hilt. As the man watched, the genin moved back into a normal standing position and turned, casually resting the black back of his katana on his shoulder as he did so.

He then raised his free hand, and Kakashi, Sakura, and Sasuke's eyes all widened at the sight of the two glittering bells dangling from the thin strings griped between his fingers.

Kakashi settled back into a more relaxed pose at the sight, and tucked one of his hands casually into a pocket. "So you did." His eyes curved upwards in a mockery of a cheerful smile, and he then called out, "Sakura, Sasuke, would you come out then?"

Slowly, Sakura rose from her crouched position in the bushes and after a long moment Sasuke followed suit, dropping gracefully from his perch in one of the sturdier trees.

Kakashi turned his attention back to the boy who had managed to catch him so thoroughly off guard. "Well then, what are you going to do with that extra bell, Naruto-kun?"

Naruto glanced at his prize, meager as it was, and thought for a moment before smirking slightly and sighing. "Heh. Of course."

Kakashi raised his visible brow in inquiry as the other two genin shifted uncomfortably in anticipation. "What?"

"Well, there's no way it could be that easy, could it?" Naruto replied. "Of course, you were holding back a lot, but still…" he cocked his head slightly. "Honestly, this is really annoying though…" Naruto made an exasperated face and looked at the bells again. He then finally sheathed his blade again and chucked both bells at his prospective teammates' heads.

Sasuke raised his hand in time to catch it easily, but Sakura, much less coordinated, didn't register the movement until the object in question was already airborne and on a collision course with her skull. Somehow, the bell managed to land perfectly in her hair, resting comfortably behind where her hitai-ate held the pink strands back from her face.

All of them, except for the swiftly reddening with anger Sakura, stared, slightly shocked, at the innocent looking bell.

"…Oops?" Naruto finally broke the sudden silence with, his voice rising at the end to make the utterance into an uncertain question.

"NA-RU-TO!"

The boy in question swiftly dodged the angry haymaker the bi-polar girl swung at his head, and then just as quickly ducked away from the follow up punch to hide behind Sasuke. Said boy sighed, irritated, but didn't move.

"Anyway!" he shouted as Sakura hesitated at the sight of her crush suddenly being between her and her target. Somehow, the bell had contrived to remain securely lodged behind the pinkette's headband and Naruto's mouth twitched slightly upwards at the sight before he managed to continue. "I was going to say that they can have the bells."

Sakura's anger swiftly dissipated at the blond's words, her eyes widening as she finally reached up remove the bell from her hair. Sasuke was more suspicious, and after staring at the bell for moment, turned slightly to glare at the other boy. "Why." He demanded.

Naruto raised an eyebrow. "Because I want to?"

Sasuke glared harder.

"Fine." Naruto sighed slightly. "Because I don't particularly feel like condemning you to another year of Iruka's lectures and multiple squealing fangirls, instead of just one," he said, smirking slightly at the thought – Sasuke almost gave a reflexive shudder – "And waiting one more year won't hinder me too much."

Sasuke narrowed his eyes at the blond before chucking the bell right back at him. It bounced off his forehead, leaving a distinct red mark. "I don't need any favors from you. Keep the bell; I'll just pass next year without you."

"Wait – Wait a minute!" Sakura interjected suddenly, suddenly feeling ashamed of the joy that had leapt into her chest when Naruto had said he'd give them the bells. She quickly shoved her own bell into Sasuke's fingers. "You guys deserve to be here much more than me." She swallowed almost painfully. "I – I'll be the one to go back to the academy."

"Well, isn't this heartwarming," Kakashi was suddenly hovering over the three of them, "Unfortunately, it doesn't work like that."

The three of them paused mid motion – Sakura still shoving the silver bell at Sasuke, Sasuke opening his mouth to say something further (whether it would have been a refusal or not was anyone's guess), and Naruto rubbing the mark Sasuke's thrown bell had left on his forehead.

He eye-smiled at them, a sense of impending doom hovering around his body. "I get the final say on if any of you pass or not. And I say…" he paused for dramatic effect, the air seeming to darken around him, and the three pre-teens braced themselves for bad news.

"…You all pass."

The three genin stumbled in shock, and stared at him, stunned. They then quickly recovered, celebrating in their own ways. Sasuke quickly stifled the smile that wanted to spread across his face, folded his arms, and nodded. Sakura squealed in excitement, her mind once more spinning off into fantasies of what it would be like to be on the same team as Sasuke. Naruto unobtrusively pumped his fist in triumph and grinned, not bothering to suppress the expression the way his new teammate had.

"Alright," Kakashi began speaking again, attracting his new genin team's attention for the last time. "There's just one more thing I need to tell you before you can go celebrate." He motioned for them to follow him, and the four ninja moved out of the clearing, heading back in the directing of their original meeting spot. Soon enough they were back where they started.

The three confused genin stood awkwardly as their new sensei moved towards the elegantly carved rock they had noticed in passing earlier when they were waiting for said jounin to arrive. He rested his hand on it for a moment in respectful silence before turning back to Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura. He took a breath and said, "I choose this training ground for a reason – and not only because it was where I used to train myself. And that reason is right here." He patted the rock gently, and with an almost painful affection.

He traced a few of the characters of the countless names carved into the panes of the stone. "The names carved on this memorial stone are those of ninja who are recognized as heroes of this village." The look in Kakashi's eye was more serious than any of the three had yet seen on his mostly hidden face as he turned his gaze back on them. They all gulped nervously under it. "But, the ones remembered here aren't normal heroes. They are heroes who died in the line of duty, protecting Konohagakure and their teammates." He eye narrowed slightly, sadness tingeing it. "…My best friend's name is carved here." After he said this he paused for a moment. Far more faces then just Obito's flew before his mind's eye.

He closed his eye for a moment to shake off the intruding memories before refocusing his gaze on his new students. "You three are the first – everyone else would just take everything I said at face value. 'A ninja must be able to see underneath the underneath'," he quoted. "But all of you were willing to go back to the academy for each other. In this world those who break the rules and codes are viewed as trash. But you know what?" he asked wistfully, "Those who would abandon their teammates are even lower than that."

The three genin stared at him, still taken aback by the man's sudden seriousness. He then clapped his hands together in an abruptly cheery manner, breaking the intense mood he had created himself entirely. "So! All three of you pass, and tomorrow Team 7 will begin its duties." He declared, and then continued to give them directions as to when and where they would meet the following morning.

Naruto let out an inaudible sigh of relief as; once again, his ears were protected by his increasingly treasured earplugs from Sakura's excited squeals. The girl was squirming excitedly as she ranted in a high-pitched and likely much louder than she thought it was, voice about her fantasies of being on the same team with her crush. Said crush completely ignored her, despite her continued gushing, and walked rapidly in the opposite direction, mumbling under his breath about needing to train more under his breath. Kakashi once more pulled out his Icha Icha, and meandered away, a perverted, high-pitched giggle erupting from under his mask every so often.

Looking at them thoughtfully as they all made their way out of the training ground, a thought occurred to him and Naruto wondered, 'Is it at all possible that it's me that's the normal one on this team?'

He took another glance at Sakura's squealing, Kakashi's equally high-pitched giggling, and Sasuke – who was currently planning a new regimen to himself out loud, and, apparently, to himself, if quietly – and decided that, yes, that was a distinct possibility.

Being as he was, perfectly aware of the oddities of his own existence…well, wasn't that a scary thought?

Omake: The Peeping Orb

"Oi! Old man!" the door of the Hokage's office slammed open, bounced off the wall violently, and slammed closed again rapidly, the swing just missing the small blond boy that had shouted the rude greeting.

Sarutobi looked up from his paperwork tiredly, ignoring the swearing of his secretary, who he could still distinctly hear through the now closed door. "….Naruto." he said, exasperated, though secretly grateful for the interruption. It never ends… "What is it this time?"

But the boy, who had moved closer to his desk, seemed distracted. Following his line of sight, he found that his eyes came to rest on his scrying orb. He chuckled then, distinctly reminded of the boy's mother – always sidetracked by something shiny. He guessed he'd just never happened to have it out while the boy was here before.

"What's that?" the child asked, eyes wide, pointing.

Sarutobi smiled, "That's my scrying orb. I use it together with a jutsu to keep an eye on people."

Naruto's eyes squinted as he thought, "…so you use it to spy on people?"

The Hokage blinked in surprise. "Yes, I suppose you could call it that."

Naruto's eyes suddenly narrowed then, the glint in them saying he'd made a connection with something he already knew and the result likely wouldn't be good – for someone else, anyway. The Hokage frowned slightly, suddenly apprehensive of whatever Naruto was about to blurt out. "The girls at the hot springs are always complaining about men spying on them." He said matter-of-factly, "But they just call it peeping."

He gasped and stared at the Hokage accusingly. "Are you a peeper, Jiji?!" he asked, horrified.

"No, no, of course not!" he quickly protested. "I just –"

"I don't know why anyone would want to peep, but I know it's bad…" Naruto said, talking over the Hokage's response. Then, he gasped lightly and the wide, horrified blue eyes returned to him, "Are you a pervert, Jiji?! A peeping pervert?!"

Sarutobi quickly protested again, "No! It's a scrying orb, not a –"

Naruto cut him off, "Jiji is a pervert! And he uses a peeping orb on the bathhouses!"

"I do not!"

Naruto glared, "You do!" he accused.

"Do not!"

"Do too!"

"Do not!"

"Do too!"

"Do – oh, for heaven's sake, I am not getting into this with you!" Sarutobi growled, standing abruptly. He could hear the chuckles of the Anbu, and flushed almost invisibly with embarrassment.

Naruto blinked and shrugged, "Ok."

Sarutobi subsided abruptly, blinking in confusion at the sudden concession. "Wha – what?" Naruto had never surrendered an argument like that before.

"The ladies also said that a pervert that constantly denies being a pervert is called a closet pervert, so you're a closet perv, Jiji." The boy stated, certain of this conclusion. "They also said that pointing it out is rude."

"…Eh?" And, suddenly, the Hokage was struggling to keep up with the rapid change in direction. He quickly sat down.

"But I'm rude, so I'll probably bring your closet perv-ness and your peeping ball up again," the blond continued, oblivious.

"…It's a scrying orb. And perv-ness isn't a word." He wasn't going to let go of this, was he? Ever. "…And I'm not a closet pervert." He belatedly stated.

Naruto blatantly ignored the Hokage's response. "So, until then, you can come and buy me some ramen. I'm hungry."

Sarutobi sighed deeply. He'd completely lost this one, hadn't he? "…Fine." Anything to make the kid drop it.

Naruto grinned.

Yes. Yes, he had.

Author's Note

So, yeah. Been awhile hasn't it? God, I'm so sorry. You guys have been wonderful, waiting so long for this chapter – Over a year!...maybe two, I lost track… – But, as I said, I just lost track of this story, especially over the last year, which has, at times, seemed endless – just, continuously, one thing after another, after another.

This includes (but is far from limited to) multiple car accidents in my family – one of which left me pretty badly injured and unable to move one of my arms for a few months ( I was actually very lucky though, seeing as I managed to smash the truck I was driving into a telephone pole…and also, incidentally, mowed down a speed limit sign in the process…) and two of which utterly totaled the vehicles involved – a very sick grandmother, a trashed laptop, yet more car troubles, loaded semesters at college, work, and more work, and… *sigh* Well, I'm sure you get the idea.

I finally got back on track with this a month or two ago after I finally got my new laptop (four months after I accidentally dropped the first one down the stairs…), and I tried to make this chapter longer than usual to make up for all the delays – Almost 8000 words! – and I honestly hope that you guys all think it made up for the wait. As a bonus, I even added on that omake – which I, rather virtuously, I think, did not count in that word count – and I hope you thought was at least amusing, as I'm perfectly aware of my weaknesses when it comes to writing straight humor - anything funny that usually gets into my writing is mostly accidental.

Now, I swear I'll do my best to get the next chapter out a lot sooner than I did this one!

~ Aljan Moonfire