Dedicated to HiddenAuthor
EDIT 3/13: New ending sentance thanks to Unrealistic!
Ding Dong
Vlad sighed and pulled open the door. "I'm very busy, so if you'd be so kind as to-" a cloud of smoke was blown in his face, causing him to stop. He waved it away and glared down at the woman who was standing in front of him. She looked fairly old, perhaps fifty, and not at all attractive. She had long frizzy black hair and was hunched over, with fingers like claws.
In other words, she was ugly. Her clothing was even worse though. She had jewelry all over her, huge earrings, several bracelets, and long necklaces. She was wearing a large beaded shawl and a headpiece to match. "Sorry about the costume hon, I just got off work." The woman said, blowing another cloud of smoke from the cigarette she was holding.
"And what, dare I ask, is your job?" Vlad already wanted to hit himself for asking.
"I'm a performer, star of the TV screen. Haven't you ever heard of Madame Loretta's Spook Hour on the Paranormal Channel?"
"Let me guess, you're Madame Loretta."
"Yup. You can call me Loretta- World-renowned séance conductor. I've brought people as close to the dead as they can get without actually kicking the bucket." She leaned closer to Vlad, who leaned away. "But I'll let you in on a little secret. None of that mumbo jumbo is real. Ghost's exist just about as much as other realms do."
Vlad stared at her, then coughed to cover a laugh. "So you tell people you talk to the dead and don't even believe in ghosts?" This was almost as bad as Lauren.
"You expect me to believe that there are the dead spirits of people floating around here?"
"That's your job, isn't it?"
Loretta laughed, and flicked her cigarette over into a bush, earning her another glare from Vlad. "Sure is hon. No one's dared to call me a fake, and you've just proved my point. People will believe anything if it's exciting enough." She peaked around Vlad and spotted Danny as he walked past. "Here, I'll show you." Loretta pushed past Vlad and entered his house, quickly going over to Danny.
"Child," She said dramatically, "Would you like to see something terrifying and wonderful? Something that will blow your mind away?"
Danny glared at her, wishing that he hadn't decided to come see who was at the door. "Okay, first off, I am not a child. I'm fifteen."
"I can show you the supernatural world, a world full of mystery and amazement!"
"It really isn't that exciting, once you've seen most of it."
"Wouldn't you like to speak with the dead?" Loretta asked, her dramatic tone wavering for a moment.
"Not really, no. Most of them don't have anything exciting to say."
Now the woman dropped the act completely. "Look kid, I'll give you five bucks to play along and let me perform a séance for you and any friends you have. I need to impress old money bags over there." She whispered, taking a five-dollar bill out of her pocket.
"Sold!" Danny said, taking the money and going off to find Sam and Molly.
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"I can't believe you dragged me into this Danny!" Sam hissed to her friend. The five of them were seated around a circular table, very reluctantly holding hands.
"Hey, she offered me five bucks for a chance to annoy Vlad, I couldn't resist." Danny said, smirking. The lights were out, with only a few candles to light up the room. In the center of the table a large crystal ball that Madame Loretta had brought was placed.
Molly looked furious but kept quiet, trying to have the least amount of contact with Vlad as possible. She was holding his hand with two fingers.
Vlad was glaring at Danny from where he sat between Loretta and Molly. As soon as Danny left Loretta began ordering the servants around, and as hard as Vlad tried to get her to leave she would always refuse. Next to Loretta was an ashtray, which she conveniently kept missing as she dropped ashes. Loretta had Vlad's hand in an iron grip, and he could tell that Molly was just putting up with this because Danny asked her to.
"There are spirits all around us," Loretta said, her voice dramatic again, "And they can speak to us, if we know the way to contact them. Today, we will speak with these beings from beyond, and revel in their knowledge."
"Knowledge of what?" Danny asked.
"Of the great beyond!" Loretta said, still keeping the act going.
""What if we talk to a lame ghost, like one that haunts boxes?"
"Or one with a hero complex?" Vlad smirked as he said this.
"Or a lonely bachelor fruitloop who desperately needs a cat!" Danny said, his eyes flashing green.
"Or a hormonal pubescent teenager with an idiot father?!"
"Or a forty year old virgin?!"
Vlad opened his mouth to respond, but couldn't think of something more insulting than what Danny had just said. Instead he resorted to glaring at him. Everyone was silent for a moment until Loretta continued. "Let us call on these spirits to guide us in the mysteries of the afterlife! Whether they are ghosts who haunt boxes or desperate bachelors!" Now Vlad's glare switched to her.
Loretta began to chant and wave her arms, making Sam and Vlad wave the arms she was holding too. Her jewelry clanged loudly and her eyes rolled back in her head. "Here they come! The ghosts!" Vlad, Sam, and Danny glanced at each other, while Molly looked bored.
"Ooh, you can feel their presence in this room! Feel the chill run down your spines as their cold souls enter our sense of perception? Your hairs stand on end as they approach? They whisper to me the answers to all of the world's questions, and wait for you to ask of them what you want.
"Yeah, why can't the rest of us see these 'ghosts'?" She asked, dropping Vlad and Danny's hands to put quotes around ghosts.
"Don't break the circle!" Madame Loretta barked, and Molly reluctantly held hands with the others again.
"Are you going to answer my-"
"Who has a question for the spirits from beyond?" Loretta called, looking around the table.
"Why can't we see them?" Sam asked, a grin on her face.
"Because they're invisible! Next question!" She yelled, her jewelry clanking again.
Vlad had decided he had had enough of this. He grinned and an invisible copy of Plasmius appeared behind him. Danny's ghost sense went off and he looked at Vlad suspiciously. Vlad smirked at Danny, and suddenly the table began to rise in front of them.
Loretta's eyes bulged out of her head as the table rose, then she calmed down. "Ah, so you've got one of the tables the studio uses. You must be a big fan." She whispered to Vlad. He scowled and the table sank back down.
Danny blinked and realized what was going on, and a grin spread across his face. "Hey, Madame Loretta, did you know that this place is haunted?"
She laughed mockingly. "Of course it is dear. Now be quiet, I'm trying to channel the spirits."
"Yeah!" Molly said suddenly. "He's a really powerful one too."
"I wouldn't say that…" Danny muttered, earning a glare from Vlad.
"Do you think you could bring him here?" Molly asked, interested now.
"I… er… Of course I can!" Loretta said, looking at Molly like she was insane. She shut her eyes and called out, "Spirit that resides in this house hold, come forth and speak to us!" Nothing happened. Loretta opened her eyes half way. "The spirit is speaking to me. He says that he is searching for something, that he has unfinished business, so that is why he stays."
From above them suddenly came the sound of laughter. Everyone looked up, including Loretta. Plasmius smirked down at her. "Really? I don't recall ever saying those words. Maybe you should clear out your ears, old woman."
Loretta gasped and stumbled backwards, pulling Vlad and Sam with her. "W-what?" Then she regained her composure, leaning over to Vlad. "Wow, great special effects. I've never seen a hologram that looked so real."
Plasmius landed in front of her, frowning. "Hologram? I'm a ghost. Just like you called for."
She turned pale. "How… how did you get him to talk Vladdy?"
Vlad shrugged. "He's a ghost, not a hologram."
Danny, Sam, and Molly watched, trying to hold in laughter. Plasmius leaned towards Loretta, and said, "Boo."
She screamed and ran from the room. "G-ghosts! They're real! All this time, they've been real!"
There was another scream, louder than the first, and someone shouted, "BEWARE! I am the Bo-" before the door slammed.