A/N: Thank you so much for the reviews readers! Your kind words and patience are greatly appreciated. Now on to the next chapter! There's a little Chip/Vicky moment in this one. ;)
Anti-Blonda: Well would ya look at this. I'm in a pre-story segment! How darlin' is that?
Anti-Wanda: Hey sis! Did ya come to watch the fight?
Anti-Blonda: Fight?
Anti-Wanda: Yeah! My Anti-Cosmo's about to whoop Anti-Wandissimo clear across the track field!
Anti-Blonda: Oh my, why in the world would he do a thing like that to my poor Lemony Cakes-uh, I mean-Anti-Wandissimo? :blushes:
Anti-Wanda: Ain't you been payin' attention? He's been manipulatin' me the whole time on the count of he's jealous of Anti-Cosmo!
Anti-Blonda: Oh...well don't you think somebody oughtta be there to pick up the pieces incase he loses?
Anti-Wanda: I guess...but who'd wanna date Anti-Wandissimo after all the lyin' he's done?
Anti-Blonda: :blushes again: I'm sure there's someone...
Double Trouble
Chapter Six: Clash of Villains
...Flashback (Anti-Cosmo POV)...
I spent the largest part of the day scheming a way to meet up with Anti-Wanda before the battle on the track field. Time was running out and we still had much to discuss.
Lady luck was surprisingly on my side that day. Hmph, leprechaun monarchs and their fickle ways. I was able to reach my love's homeroom class long before any of the other students arrived. A menacing smirk played about on my face as I silently stole up behind the teacher who was busy grading papers at her desk, stamping Fs and scribbling notes in her grade book. She was out cold before she even knew what hit her. I tossed the dented wand to the side and stuffed the unconscious dupe into the supply locker. Then I proceeded to take a piece of chalk and scribble a message upon the blackboard indicating that her students were to report to Mr. O'Gimpy's class instead.
I had nary a moment to reflect upon my brilliance as one by one the students poofed in, read the message, and poofed away. By the list of names in the grade book I snatched off her desk I could tell that Anti-Wanda was the only one left, perfect. Turning off the lights I floated back into the darkest corner of the classroom and waited in silence for my unsuspecting dimwit to arrive.
POOF!
Ah, right on cue...
"Hello?" she looked about dumbfounded. I could just imagine the chill running her down her spine, that strange feeling that someone was watching building up inside her.
"Ain't they anybody here yet?"
A soft chuckle nearly escaped me when she began to frantically seek out a light switch. Yes I am a sucker for dramatic tension and desperate uneasiness was practically radiating from my beloved prey!
The lights flickered on and she took note of what I'd written on the blackboard. The relief she felt at that instant was plainly written upon her pale blue face.
She made a comment to the effect of it being strange that her teacher would've left the lights off when there was a message on the board. My smirk turned into an all out sneer. My but she must've possessed a strong sixth sense for she froze in place and lingered a moment before working up the nerve to turn around. Nothing could have been more delicious than the look of sheer terror written across her face when her pink orbs locked with my crimson leer.
I floated forward from the shadows and leaned in until our noses touched. Once I had her full attention I said the first devious sentence which came to mind, "Hello Clarisse."
Her eyes widened, "Who in tarnation's Clarisse?"
Heh, I said it was the first devious sentence...not the smartest. With a mental curse I blamed my sudden dimness on the fact that my monocle wasn't in place.
"So sorry," I apologized smoothly placing it over my right eye, "can't see a thing without my monocle. Now, back to the business at hand."
I seized Anti-Wanda's hands up into my own and drew her close. "I'm sure that by now you're fully aware of the battle which will be taking place at the stroke of three?"
"Yeah," she nodded, "but I don't really sees the point of it all. I mean ain't I the one who's supposed be choosin' who I dates? Least that's what you've been tryin' to tell me, right?"
Well, she had me there.
"Correct precious, but this fight isn't only a battle for your affection." I informed her, "That dupe Anti-Wandissimo double-crossed me. He went behind my back and smeared my name, making me out to be some sort of ungentlemanly cad. For that he will pay dearly."
"So uh," the feeling of uneasiness began to sit in again, I could tell by the way she averted her gaze, "what exactly did ya want with me then?"
"A moment alone to sort out my true feelings." I explained casually. "Since the moment I first laid eyes upon you I could tell you were going to be an important part of my life. Now, whether I like it or not, you've proven yourself to be the only woman capable of capturing my fancy. So the question begs to be asked: how do you truly feel about me?"
She paused a moment and bit down on her lip. A certain nervousness began to envelop me as her pink eyes continued to avert my green ones. It was if she was searching for the answer herself. From over her shoulder I could see the clock hanging upon the wall. It was precisely two fifty-six. Four minutes away from one of the biggest duels of my life. My honor, my pride, my very enrollment, here I was laying it all on the line for a simple minded twit who plucked nimbly at my heartstrings. And yet the only thing that concerned me was my steadfast resolve to chance everything on the desperate hope that maybe-just maybe-she felt the same.
...End of Flashback (Normal POV)...
Downstairs at the Turners' residence (present day) Vicky sat channel surfing while Chip hummed happily to himself.
"Do you have to sing that stupid teeth song over and over?" she complained.
"I'm not singing babe, I'm humming!" he remarked cheerfully pulling her closer with his arm draped across her shoulders.
"Ugh," she rolled her eyes and turned off the television.
"The little dude sure has been quiet since ya sent him upstairs." he said absently.
"Well duh," Vicky sighed, "the little twerp's in bed asleep. Or at least he'd better be if he knows what's good for him."
"Aw but ya didn't even let him stay up to watch any late night TV shows," Chip pouted playfully, "We're supposed to be the fun babysitters lettin' him do all the stuff his parents never do when they're at home."
"Fun?" Vicky scoffed, "You've been watching too many corny kid movies Skylark."
With a sigh Chip sank back against the couch, "So when are the Turners coming back anyway?"
"Not for another half hour." Vicky grumbled after glancing at the VCR clock. "Ever since I started college they've had less time to go out so when I'm in town I get stuck babysitting Timmy for half the night."
"Heh, at least you'll have plenty of experience for when ya open your own daycare center." Chip observed with a laugh.
Vicky turned to glare at him but couldn't resist grinning at his goofy 'perfect toothed' smile. Instead she playfully punched him on the shoulder, "You're such a dork."
Chip's smile widened when Vicky reclined against him and started drifting off to sleep. It was moments like these that he looked forward to when he was stuck for hours in a van touring the country or sitting in a make-up chair all morning before an afternoon photo shoot. With a sigh of contentment he began humming again, this time a different song. One he'd rewritten especially for his temperamental girlfriend. Gradually his humming changed to softly sung lyrics of flawless quality.
Hey Vicky you've got me lovesicky
But gettin' close to you is provin' oh so tricky...
...Flashback (Normal POV)...
A dark figure poofed inside the classroom and loomed over the vacant desk in front of the blackboard, red eyes slowly dimmed to reveal two deep blue irises behind a pair of crescent moon shaped glasses. "Hm..."
Wordlessly she studied the message on the board squinting a bit as if suspicious of something.
When Mr. O'Gimpy poofed into the office perplexed by his doubly packed classroom Principal Anti-Carl had sent Vice Principal Anti-Di to investigate.
It figures the pompous idiot couldn't drag himself out of his swirling leather chair to do it himself. she thought bitterly.
She was determined to take out her aggression on the neglectful teacher by tracking her down and barraging her with a series of rather scathing insults...before slapping her with a pink slip and booting her out the double doors.
A muffled moan from the supply locker caught her attention. Her high heels clicked on the tile floor as she drew closer to the sound. She stopped in front of the storage locker and glared at the lock. After tossing a quick glance to either side of the room to confirm she was alone Anti-Di raised her right hand and snapped.
GONG!
The lock instantly opened and fell from the clasp. With a sudden jerk she threw open the doors and sneered down at the semi-conscious teacher.
"What in blue blazes hit me?"
"Precisely what I'd like to know." Anti-Di spat.
The teacher instantly bolted upright and started to tremble, "V-Vice Principal Anti-Di? Wh-What brings you h-here?"
"Are you aware that Mr. O'Gimpy is covering both his class and yours this afternoon?"
"N-No ma'am." the teacher seemed very surprised indeed. Meaning she probably hadn't been the victim of a classroom riot.
"Would you mind telling me what you were doing in a supply locker?" it may have been a question but her tone was very demanding.
"I-I don't know Ms. Anti-Di." the teacher responded nervously rubbing the tender bump on the back of her head. "The last I can remember I was sitting at my desk before homeroom grading papers and then-WHAMO!"
Anti-Di arched an eyebrow, clearly not a fan of embellished sound effects. "Whamo? That hardly helps."
When she drew back a step the light from overhead reflected off a misshapen black object lying on the floor.
"What have we here?" Anti-Di thought aloud as she examined the clue.
"It's a wand ma'am," the teacher looked stunned, "I swear Ms. Anti-Di, I don't allow the kids to play with those during school hours! It must belong to that rascal who beamed me from behind."
"Brilliant deduction Holmes," the vice principal scoffed as she tucked the evidence away into the fold of her jacket. "I suggest you pay closer attention to your surroundings-that is-if you want to keep your pathetic little job."
"Y-Yes ma'am, I'll do that." the teacher promised.
Anti-Di turned to leave intent on getting to the bottom of this deliberate violation of Da Anti-Rules, "Oh, and one more thing."
"Yes?"
In a flash the cowering teacher found herself back inside the supply locker with the lock back in place. "Aaahh!"
"Whamo indeed," Anti-Di smirked as she poofed away.
...Flashback (Anti-Wandissimo POV)...
I was first to arrive upon the track field mere seconds after the clock tolled three. For a moment I had a brief hope that perhaps Anti-Cosmo had lost his nerve, which would result in an automatic victory for me. But alas, my misguided joy was to be short lived. For at that very moment...
"You know for an anti-fairy who's about to have his wings ripped apart you seem awfully cheerful old chum."
"Anti-Cosmo?" I gasped and spun around to face my adversary. Little did I realize that the shock of my life awaited me. "Ah! And Anti-Wanda?"
"Howdy Anti-Wandissimo!" my beloved waved coyly with her arm interlocked with his!
"I do not believe it!" I shouted in dismay. "What...what cruel joke is this?"
"It's no joke old friend," Anti-Cosmo mocked me, "for once in her undermined little life Anti-Wanda has made her own choice. And she chose me."
"But...but...but..." I could only stammer as gasps echoed throughout the crowd of students who had gathered to watch the fight.
"So sorry old bean, better luck next time."
That was it! All I could take! The straw that broke the burro's back! Enraged by his arrogance, that smug grin plastered upon his face, and the knack he had for effortlessly upturning my whole life I drew my sword and prepared to carve out his thieving heart!
"Have at you!"
"Ah, swordplay is it?" he appeared quite amused by my choice of weaponry, "Very well, if it's an old fashioned duel you want then that's exactly what you're going to get!"
I watched as he drew his wand and transformed it into a sword. The star at the tip sprouted a handle and became the hilt while the other end stretched and narrowed to a sharp pointed blade. Truly he was a master in the art of black magic. But I would never allow myself to be bested in the skillful art of swordplay!
"Enguard!" I shouted as we both sprang forward.
Our swords clashed and clanged as we paced to and fro across the field in a heated dance of deadly steps. One wrong move from either of us could spell disaster. Yes, even now I can recall the certain thrill I received from dueling against such a formidable opponent. If only I could emerge triumphant, the entire student body would quake at my presence and the name Anti-Wandissimo would forever strike terror into the hearts of all who would hear it!
"Run him through Anti-Wandissimo!" I recognized the voice as that of my darling's friend, Anti-Goldie.
"Aw shut it ya gold digger!" Anti-Wanda snapped, "He ain't nothin' but a lyin' snake in the grass!"
Those words cut through me sharper than any knife. My darling, my black rose, my swirly haired beauty...she was no longer mine. Whatever might have been between us was forever lost in the lies and deception I had been forced to weave in order to pull her away from my debonair adversary.
My rival obviously sensed my heartbreak for he made quick use of driving the stake in deeper. "So you finally realize that you've lost eh? Well it's about time! You should've never tangled with me you dope. Now you'll pay dearly for slandering my reputation!"
"Do not think that I shall be so easily defeated you scoundrel!" I snapped back as our swords met again. "I have lost everything and it is all because of YOU!"
"Well you know what they say," he gave a mocking shrug, "'tis better to have loved and lost-"
"Keep that in mind when I pin you to the wall!" I exclaimed jabbing forward and catching him in the upper left arm.
"Oh no!" Anti-Wanda screamed from the sidelines, "Anti-Cosmo are you alright?"
"You're so fickle Anti-Wanda," Anti-Goldie scoffed with her hands upon her hips, "One minute you're fawning over the foreign exchange student and the next you're back with that brace faced nerd!"
"You stay outta this Anti-Goldie!" my darling ordered, "I ain't in no mood to be puttin' up with your big mouth!"
Anti-Goldie wasn't one to tolerate insults, "Oh yeah? Well who's gonna make me Ms. Bumpkin?"
"ME!"
For a moment the crowd's attention was drawn away from us and over to the bickering ladies where a fist had just connected with Anti-Goldie's jaw.
"Anti-Plumey?" I heard my beloved gasp.
"Hey there Anti-Wanda," her friend smiled back at her, "sorry I didn't listen to you earlier. You were right, about everything."
The smile that appeared on Anti-Wanda's face managed to soothe my aching heart for a moment. But that moment had to be brief for Anti-Cosmo had recovered from his wound and struck out slashing me across the shin.
"Take that you pathetic poser!"
I winced in pain but countered with a lightning fast swipe which trimmed a good two inches off his bangs.
We both snarled at one another as our battle raged on, intensified by our growing hatred.
"Oh my gosh!" Anti-Puff poofed into view and spotted Anti-Goldie bitterly nursing a busted lip. "What happened?"
"Hn, ask them!" Anti-Goldie pointed to Anti-Wanda and her friend, both smiling proudly and watching the fight.
"Hey?" Anti-Luther skimmed the crowd in confusion, "Where the heck did Anti-Binky get too? I can't believe he'd miss this!"
Meanwhile we battled on; it's truly astonishing how greatly adrenaline can enhance one's skills. Ten minutes had passed since we'd first drawn our swords and now our fearsome duel was nearing its end.
"Give it up senor," I chided, "while it is true you are quite skilled with a wand you are no match for a master of swordsmanship such as myself! If you had as much common sense as foolish pride you would have stuck to a duel of black magic!"
"Black magic, swordplay, chess, or dastardly schemes," Anti-Cosmo replied in that same overconfident tone that made my blood boil, "I'll always have more than enough skill to best you my foolish friend!"
"Friend? HA! The time for that has come and gone senor!"
"Then I suppose we'll just have to settle for being enemies," he smirked before twirling his sword about so quickly I could not follow his movements. The next thing I knew he had knocked the sword from my hand and sent it spiraling towards the edge of the startled crowd where it stabbed deeply into the ground.
Anti-Luther gave a girlish shriek before fainting. I cannot say that I blame him, if it come that close to my fagiggly gland I too would have reverted back to a prepubescent octave.
I turned my attention back to Anti-Cosmo who wore an ear-to-ear fang revealing grin.
"I know," I sighed in dismay, "I lose, but I do so with honor!"
"And a very telltale consolation prize." He added.
The statement puzzled me. Then I felt it, the stinging sensation which ran along the side of my left temple.
"MY FACE!" I exclaimed slapping a hand over the bleeding wound.
"Consider it something to remember our short-lived friendship by." he mocked me, yes, even then that villain had the audacity to MOCK me!
"My face!" I repeated again in disbelief, "My...my beautiful face!"
He had marred perfection and as much as I hated him for that and all of the many other wrongs he had done me I had to admit he was the better fighter.
To attempt revenge then would have been suicidal. No, I would have to abide by the terms of our agreement and leave Carl Poofy Pants Anti-Fairy High never again to darken its doorway with my shameful presence.
What began as a few poorly suppressed snickers soon became a torrent of thunderous laughter from the crowd. Everyone basked in my humiliation; all eyes were on me, all fingers pointing out my utter failure. And my darling Anti-Wanda...
...locked in the embrace of my villainous rival.
Deception has a heavy price my friend. And I bare mine even to this very day. For the mask you see, it is not just a scrap of fabric to cover my scar but a symbol of the shame and abject humiliation I suffered when I relied upon trickery and deceit to win a love so obviously intended to be bestowed upon another.
...End of Flashback (Normal POV)...
"Eloquently put Anti-Wandissimo," Remy spoke once the tale had reached its end. "It seems that Fate does not take kindly to those who seek to alter the course of destiny."
"That is good," Anti-Wandissimo perked up, whipping out a pencil and pad. "I shall have to remember to use that the next time I tell the story!"
Remy rolled his lime green eyes, "Speaking of which, now that this little trip down memory lane is over perhaps you feel prepared to help me exact a little revenge on Turner?"
"Until your fairy godfather returns senor, I am at your service." Anti-Wandissimo bowed.
"Good," Remy rubbed his hands together menacingly, "now let's show Turner that when you attempt to woo another's intended great misfortune is sure to follow..."
"So Anti-Wandissimo transferred back to his old school and never bothered you guys again?" Timmy inquired with a yawn, it was getting awfully late.
"Yes well, it wasn't as though I left him a choice." Anti-Cosmo grinned deviously.
"Oh let me tell this part sug!" Anti-Wanda volunteered eagerly.
"Very well," Anti-Cosmo nodded, "it should be enough to push him straight into dreamland."
...Flashback (Anti-Wanda POV)...
It wasn't two seconds after the duel done ended when the laughin' stopped and everybody froze up like deer in the headlights!
The crowd parted and we all seen Vice Principal Anti-Di a standin' there holding Anti-Binky up by his wings. He sure looked terrified! The rest of us was might scared too. But she didn't say a word, just marched straight up to the three of us in the center and glared down with them deep pools of icy darkness!
Me, Anti-Cosmo, and Anti-Wandissimo was completely covered in her chilly black shadow. Finally she twisted her mouth sideways in one of them intimidatin' sneers and barked out, "Alright you sniveling maggots, present your wands!"
Slowly we all searched our persons and came up with our wands...well, almost all of us. Anti-Cosmo was first, he took his 'sword' and transformed it back into his wand again. Anti-Di fixed her glare on me but I was ready with my wand too. That's when she stared down Anti-Wandissimo who was still a frantically searchin' for his.
"Well?" she growled.
"I-I-I am sorry Vice Principal Anti-Di!" he stammered. "I-I cannot seem to find my wand. I must have misplaced it! Perhaps it is in my locker, or-"
Ms. Anti-Di dropped Anti-Binky (who'd gone and ratted us out, the big chicken) and reached inside her jacket. Everybody cringed expectin' the worst but she just pulled out a dented up black wand and held it out in front of Anti-Wandissimo. "Or perhaps I have it right here?"
Ya shoulda seen the look of confusion on his face! It sure was priceless!
"I-I-I-"
"You, are in a lot of trouble whelp." she seethed and took out that great big copy of Da Anti-Rules. "Do you have any idea how many of these rules you've just broken?"
"What?" Anti-Wandissimo was dumbstruck. My Anti-Cosmo just smirked.
"Assaulting a teacher, disrupting class, practicing black magic unsupervised during school hours!" her tone got louder and more threatenin' like with every infraction she named.
"But I am innocent!" Anti-Wandissimo shouted.
"Oh save it," Anti-Di wasn't buyin' a word of it, "This is your wand is it not?"
"Well...uh...yes?"
"And it was found at the scene of the crime." She added menacingly, "How stupid of you to make such an amateur mistake. I'm afraid Anti-Wandissimo that your enrollment here is henceforth terminated."
"What?"
"You're EXPELLED." She clarified with a fang filled grin as she snapped the book shut.
Anti-Wandissimo's purple eyes practically bugged right outta his head! I just knew my Anti-Cosmo had something to do with that! Man what a smart trick! After all the manipulatin' my ex-boyfriend had done I almost wished I'd thought of it. No matter what the outcome of their feud out on the track field, Anti-Cosmo had made sure Anti-Wandissimo got kicked outta Carl Poofy Pants Anti-Fairy High. Now that's what I calls villainy!
"But Ms. Anti-Di, I-I was FRAMED!" Anti-Wandissimo blurted but wound up getting a size eight and a half to his backside anyways. Gotta hand it to Anti-Di, she sure got some distance bootin' him out! Why I bet she kicked him all the way back to whatever school he got exchanged from.
"And as for the rest of you slackers," she gave us all one of them dirty warning looks, "GET OUT OF MY SIGHT!"
One great big poof and the track field was cleared.
...End of Flashback (Normal POV)...
"ZZZZZzzzzz..."
The anti-fairies watched as Timmy lay snoozing in the middle of his bed.
"I guess I ain't lost my touch," Anti-Wanda grinned and blew on her nails.
"Now maybe we'll get some peace and quiet around here until daybreak." Anti-Cosmo sighed, "Meeting the requirements of this idiotic reform program can be most tiresome."
"Please tell me we's almost ready to make a break for it?" Anti-Wanda begged.
"Almost dear," her husband assured her, "just another day or so and we'll be home free!"
"But ain't our fairy selves gonna be back soon?"
"Yes, we'll be cutting it rather close," Anti-Cosmo admitted, "But don't worry; my plan is so ingenious that nothing can thwart it! All we have to do is keep the child happy and Jorgen will be none the wiser until it's too late."
"If you says so," Anti-Wanda used her magic to tuck Timmy in before floating over to the fishbowl with her hubby and changing forms.
Two blue-tinted goldfish splashed down into the bowl just as Mr. and Mrs. Turner pulled into the driveway.
Amanda/Artiste: And another long chapter comes to a close. There's more to come so please review! Next Chapter: Remy plots to publicly humiliate Timmy the next time he makes a pass at Trixie. But since Timmy's misery could bring Jorgen von Strangle down on their heads Anti-Cosmo and Anti-Wanda have to cross wands with their old classmate. Plus more flashbacks of the anti-couple's past, including their first date!