Errr, I've just gotten back from a trip -.- I'm so tired! I've been buried with college things and with reading Eclipse and Breaking Dawn (it's from the Twilight Saga) if you haven't read that, do!! It's really good! I'll probably be fanfic-ing that way soon XD
Well this chap is just…..blah
But errr please read and review it anyway, just to make me happy! Lol
Me no own. You no sue :D Everyone's happy!
--
He left for the manor as soon as he had had breakfast, his Dark Mark had not once stung and so – although he hadn't spoke to his professor – he was guessing he was being requested by Lucius and not their Lord.
His father spent the whole day out, and so all Draco could do was wander around the manor. He read in the library, requested food from the elves, did homework in advance and ended up sleeping a bit out of sheer boredom.
Night came at last and the Malfoy's patriarch came along with it. He seemed especially smug today, as though he had accomplished a great deed or was about to experience something great.
"Father." Draco greeted, in the tone he used when he refused to acknowledge his father's superiority. He wasn't as eager to be here today as he had been last week…
"Draco." The man nodded back, those cunning eyes smiled in the same sadistic way he did. "I'll get straight to the point, since I'm sure you had all day to sit around doing nothing… " He said in an accusing tone that made his son want to go barmy. "I've got an assignment for you today." He started. "You can think of it as… training for the real thing." Malfoy senior said vaguely.
The blonde boy made sure to stand tall, no matter how the older man was looking at him, and nodded.
"Well, I feel you'll understand it all much better if I show you rather then explain it." Lucius continued. "So come along, to the dungeons."His words drifting as he turned his back to the boy and left the room.
Draco wouldn't admit it, but the idea of the dungeons made him shiver a bit. No matter what one could think, being crucio'ed wasn't something anyone could get used to. But, using reason, he was nearly sure it'd be nothing of the sort. Lucius liked to impose himself, to show off his power, he never repeated the same show twice.
When they reached the dungeons Draco started to hear faint noises, they were strange high pitched sounds that reached his ears again and again, however soft they were.
He frowned, wondering what it could mean, already preparing himself to deal with whatever it was. This time, his father could really have brought a creature for him to fight, or something alike, that'd emit such cry.
His father looked at him one last time before opening the heavy doors.
The room was dimly lit by the torches on the wall and a couple of men were in front of one of the cells. Draco wasn't sure if they were guarding something or tormenting it through the bars.
The soft sound came again, a cry, and the blonde boy wasn't sure his imagination had run wild or if that noise was really…
He approached the men, both of which turned around to look at him briefly and then at his father. At Lucius' nod they moved out of the way, allowing the Malfoy heir to finally see what was captive in the cell.
And he found himself looking at the frightened eyes of a child.
--
"Why are you making that face?" Ron asked, looking over his best mate's shoulder, trying to get a glimpse of the letter he was holding.
Harry made a noise as though to say he didn't really hear the question, he was too focused on the words before him. Only when he had scanned the whole message twice did he look up and tune back to the world.
"…Dad came back" He finally said, though – to Ron – his tone didn't seem to match the news.
"And that's bad… how?" the red-head asked, sitting down beside him.
The Boy-Who-Lived sighed, pocketing the letter. "He's gone again. Off to meet with the other werewolves."
Ron's mouth turned into an 'o' as he tried to put on his best supportive face.
"He barely said anything in this… " The black-haired one muttered, then made a frustrated sound. "I can't believe how messed up everything is right now! I can't even talk to my bloody parents because of that Umbridge woman controlling the mail."
"You need to relax a bit mate, you're too worried ya'know? Your dad can manage, you know that."
But he didn't, he didn't accept that his father was out there exposing himself and, on top of it all, probably sharing the same grounds as the monster who gave him the curse in the first place.
Hermione choose that moment to appear out of nowhere and, loudly, take a seat beside her boyfriend.
"I hate to say this, Harry, but Ron's right." She said, proving she had been listening to at least part of their conversation. "Mr. Lupin isn't impulsive, he thinks before he acts and he's not likely to get himself into trouble. I know you're worried, but you should give him more credit." she argued.
The messy haired one only mumbled something that should have been. "I give him enough credit." Then he remembered that the letter contained another piece of important information. "And he tried to tell me about something… it was through codes so I'm not really sure, but I think there's trouble coming up. He said he found out things while staying with his 'friends'."
The bushy-haired witch had a frown already, wondering what it could be. Ron looked at the fire place as though his mind was wondering elsewhere. "An attack, you mean?" He asked, turning to other boy.
Harry shrugged. "I'm not sure, it could be. And Voldemort has been a lot happier lately… I think things are looking up for him. He's got a plan going on, I can tell."
"Then we have to be extra careful." The girl said at once, her serious eyes set on figuring out the new situation.
They sat in silence after that for a minute or so, each lost in their own private thoughts. They only looked up when Hermione's expression changed and she stood up hastily. "Oh, DA! That's why I came here, come along you guys." She remembered, already taking steps towards the door.
Harry was the last one to move, he was still thinking about the letter… he knew something bad was coming.
--
"What? Wait!" Was all he managed to yell at the closing door, his father was already gone.
He could still hear the gate minutes after it had been closed behind his back, it was as though it had become a constant ringing sound in the back of his mind.
Kill it.
That had been the precise order he had received from Lucius before the man casually left, locking him inside the dimly illuminated room with the muggle girl.
He had briefly said something about Draco having to control his emotions and do anything that was asked of him as well. But the teen could barely remember that part. Or the other one which explained how this child came to be here, however he unconsciously acknowledged them both.
He couldn't turn away from that pair of eyes that looked back at him through tears. And the look they gave him was enough to make his heart skip beats. Killing… he had really been requested to kill… to take a life for the first time. It seemed so surreal at the moment that one second he was up in his room waiting for Lucius to come home and then he was down here, with the task of becoming a murderer. It seemed so unreal fact that he didn't manage to quite grasp the situation entirely.
He had to kill someone.
And it was only now, when he was face to face with a to-be victim, that he understood that it wouldn't be quite like he imagined. Above all, he had never… he never thought it'd be this hard. He thought it'd be as simple as… the flick of a wand together with the speaking of a couple of words. But it wasn't, it might be in the technical sense of it, but not on the whole.
It wasn't a matter of magic and ability; it was a matter of principles, moral, or the distortion of both.
It was true he hated the mere idea that one day his culture and traditions would be lost, that everything his ancestors had built would crumble from the constant mixing with another kind. He hated that he had to treat these outsiders as though they were just like him, worthy as he was to study the subtle art of magic. He really did want to help make a world where only people like him, aware of what it really meant to be a wizard, entered the halls of Hogwarts and all other schools of wizardry across the globe.
It was one thing to want that, it was one thing to fight for it, to show people his point of view and eliminate those who dared stand in the way. It was another thing entirely to invade a home in the darkness of the night to kidnap a child who wasn't even aware that the wizarding world existed - let alone part of the group tainting it.
And it was towards said child Draco was pointing his wand, at that very moment.
This was stupid, this was…
His father wasn't trying to test him, he wasn't trying to gain proof that Draco would be able to take a life should he need to, or be ordered to. He was being sadistic. How in the name of Merlin would the death of this girl help their cause at all? This was just for sport and Draco didn't know what to do about it.
"This is crazy." He muttered to himself, still unable to look away from the pair of honey-colored eyes that trembled with fear.
His grip on the wand tightened and he clenched his teeth tight. He wondered if taking part in this war to fight for what he thought right would slowly morph him into someone who had no morals… He wondered if there'd be other people unrelated to the war he'd have to murder along the way. And he wondered as well, about what would happen if they won… would they aim for actually destroying muggles all together?
On the other hand, if he didn't do it now… The Dark Lord would think him to be useless… to be someone weak who couldn't kill. He was sure the man wouldn't understand the subtle difference between his willingness to kill anyone and to kill those who oppose their progress.
He had to do it.
He swallowed hard, trying to get his emotions under control, he could do it! He had trained all his life to able to do something like this. He could… he could.
He pointed his wand at her again, the trembling in his hand wouldn't stop. "Av… Avad-" he started, but his voice just wouldn't come out anymore.
There were parents looking for her, she had thoughts, a past and feelings. She had a life ahead of her. She felt fear and pain just like everyone else… and he'd be a murderer… he'd… be a murderer.
"Damn it!" He cursed. His reason and emotions were fighting a grand battle inside of him.
"Where's my mommy?" The little girl finally dared ask, as though she was thinking Draco to be more inoffensive.
That seemed to do it for him, it had taken that phrase to make him acknowledge it. This was the point of it… if he didn't manage to kill the girl in front of him… it'd mean he was letting his emotions control him. It was unacceptable. He was better than this, this was just another step he had to climb so he could reach the top… it didn't mean anything.
There wasn't a person in front of him, there wasn't, there was a task and he had to face it as such.
"Ava..da Ked-davra" he said, trying to sound resolved, but his voice wavered and nothing but frustrated sparkles came out of his wand.
'If you do it, you've got to mean it.' His father's voice echoed through his mind.
He breathed in heavily and tried not to think about it.
'I can do it… I can mean it' He tried to convince himself.
He started focusing on feelings of the past. On the anger he had felt towards his father many times before, the frustration he felt towards the world, all the countless negative feelings he nurtured for Potter and his bunch…
He let, purposely, all those feelings build up inside of him and it wasn't hard to feel enraged by those memories. It wasn't exactly mastering feelings, it was twisting them around and using them as he pleased. No matter what, it was good enough. Suddenly it seemed that no girl was in front of him, but in her place there were the ghosts of his life, all of which he wanted to eliminate.
This time the spell left his lips smoothly and clearly.
"Avada Kedavra!"
--
He sat on the window still, staring at the night outside, it disturbed him to admit it…but he knew it was true. He felt empty and… bored.
One week, that was all it had taken for him to become addicted to the blonde, mere five days. And where was his escape route now that he needed it? Where was he…? He needed to hide out at their world so he could forget this one, he wanted – like he had all those nights before – to forget it once again.
He couldn't quite place what it was, besides the Slytherin's absence, which seemed odd. But he knew, in the back of his mind, that something was wrong. Not wrong in the something-dangerous-is-out-to-get-me sort of way – that would be considered normal, really – but he knew he had missed something. A fact in his day didn't quite fit the logical picture and he couldn't put his finger on it… he hated the feeling of forgetting something important!
He sighed, wishing his body and mind's control felt less alien to him. Wanting to, somehow, feel like he ruled his own actions and feelings.
His anger did nothing to prevent the slow and familiar feeling of a sudden vision that was coming. And however sudden it was, he did nothing to fight it… seriously, how worse could it get these days anyway? Hell, It could even help him to know what was going on Voldemort's psychopathic mind.
Things seemed really different this time though… he saw through the man's eyes, as always, but it felt foreign to him… like this wasn't his usual watching place.
For one, he couldn't really see things clearly like the flashes that came from the Dark Lord. These images were blurred, they were wrong, not meant for his eyes.
His emotions started to mix with those of his host and he was confused, the feelings were not the usual either.
He felt disgust towards something, towards someone. Also, there was fear, desperation and compassion that were being shoved inside the darkest of places inside the person's heart.
He could barely make out what he was seeing. Unlike the emotions that were easy, unblocked, his vision was nearly all gone because of the darkness of the room around him.
He thought he heard something, it was a faint sound, but still… it was there. All of a sudden there was a flash of green light he knew all too well. It was easy enough to guess what that sound had been seconds before.
Shaking his head, he made no more effort to see anything. Where ever he was and whoever his host was, he needed no explanations to understand that all he'd see if he could would be someone's corpse.
Then the soft, yet characteristic, sound of someone's sobs started to echo through the air. He must have just killed whomever in front of a loved one, or in front of a future victim who was waiting to follow in the same fate.
He wasn't sure though, he was still deprived from his eyesight.
But it soon made sense, it didn't matter he couldn't see a thing, because he learned that he was the one shedding those tears. He was devastated by something… he had been hit with realization so violently, he could barely keep his knees from giving in under him.
What had he done…? What had he done?!
He was roughly pulled from that reality, that body and those foreign feelings. Even that was unlike what usually happened to him, he didn't drift slowly back to his own self. It seemed he had just been woken up by having a large bucket of icy water being thrown on him.
He felt a warm drop run down his face and he lifted his fingers up to touch it. He was really crying, unlike all the times before, the sadness still lingered. It was as thought everything that had just happened had happened to him.
He curled up unconsciously, feeling like his legs had been knocked out from underneath him, as though there was nothing to grasp. He felt lost. And he knew that, no matter who the murderer from that strange vision had been, they were right now feeling the exact same thing.
--
A.N:
Ok this chapter was just…yuck. I hate it ok? End of story LOL Ok, fine, I don't hate it, but as you can all see…nothing actually happened. Well, action is coming, so please hold on lol XD
Answer to Reviews:
fantasyfan4ever: always the first to review hehehe :P Thanks!!
Airlady: thank you ;) I try really hard to make it that way! Glad you like it :D
Hendrick248848: here it is!
Moony73: Omg, no, seriously... you scare me duddette -laughs- I mean, you understand -everything- don't you? LOLOLOLOL The whole remus-is-being-impersonated thing? I was feeling it throughout the chapter hehehehehehe I can't believe someone would grasp something so subtle -hugs you- aren't you just something? But ahmmm, I won't say anything hehe you'll figure it out :DD The harry-draco thing...I felt I should rush things up a bit, and yeah, some things were a bit off, but hopefully it'll all fit in the bigger picture :P
hahah review as you wish XDD Harry acts stupid XD specially around other people lol. The violence thing, yeah, this chapter shows a lot of what you said. Draco is changing because he's realizing how things really work :) I'll let you in on a secret :P The Lucius-Draco relationship is the only I like to write the most :) it's really 'personal' sort of. But it's kinda shadowed a bit for now, I'll show more of it later :P
Definately! 2 Moony reviews in one day makes me want to wriiiite :DDD But I can't LOL, I've got a job interview tomorrow and it's late here heheh gotta sleep lol.
Anyway, thank you very much again! I love your reviews -hugs-
rosenotrosi: Thank you very much :) Hunnn kill Sirius eh? I wonder...:P hahah Can't tell you that can I? Here is the chappie! Thanks!
Medicinal Biscuit: I'm glad! thank you! :DDD
Illyra: Thank you :D I guess it was the easiest way to bring them together hehe :PPP I'm glad it came out ok! -kisses-
Kailany-Aurora: Thank you!
Hollee: You're VIP, so you get answered by email XDDD hahahha ; -hugs you-