A/N: I am so sorry that I haven't updated in so long guys! I was on holiday last week so I had no internet access whatsoever! Thank you for the reviews and subscriptions etc, keep them coming I really appreciate it and I really love to hear what you think and what you want to happen next. I will really try to write more this week as I am on study leave now and have nothing to do with myself during the day. Well, as ever, enjoy the chapter. Oh, btw, don't lose hope, there will be more Edward soon, I promise!

Bella's POV

I got dressed with difficulty, not really noticing what I was putting on, concentrating more on holding together the huge hole in the middle of my chest together. It was too early to go downstairs but I couldn't stay in my room any longer, there were too many memories I had to try desperately to repress and I didn't have enough energy for school, let alone crying as well. I trudged down the stairs into Charlie's tiny kitchen and went to the fridge to get out the eggs, if I made Charlie's breakfast for him it might get him off my case, it was usually a task I left to him, but it meant a limited range of breakfasts due to Charlie's limited culinary skills. I was too tired for anything fancy so I put some oil into the frying pan and waited for it to heat up enough for the eggs.

Charlie came down the stairs just as I was sliding the eggs from the frying pan onto his plate, his face was everything I expected, and then something I hadn't recognised. He warily sat down in his usual seat, eyeing the eggs as if they were raw on his plate. I checked just in case, I could never be sure of what I was doing these days. There never seemed a point to anything, the point of my existence had left me months ago and I didn't know what to do with my life anymore. Charlie interrupted my train of thought by slamming his fist down on the kitchen table with some considerable force. "Damn it Bella listen to me!" he yelled, I hadn't even realised that he'd been talking to me, I wondered if I'd been doing that a lot lately. "What is wrong with you today? I know you haven't been coping that well, but today, making me breakfast, not concentrating, not eating, is there something you need to tell me?"

I hadn't realised that I'd been making myself that obvious; normally I could hide how badly I was coping from Charlie, but obviously not this morning. But what was he talking about? What could I possibly have to tell him? I never leave the house apart from school or work, what news could there possibly be? Again my wondering was interrupted by Charlie shouting my name. "Bella, I know you want to move back with your Mom, will you just tell me straight because this is killing me!" Suddenly it all fell into place, Charlie was worried that I was leaving him; I can't see that he'd miss me, I was hardly human company.

"Dad, calm down, I'm not moving to Jacksonville" I whispered, but Charlie wasn't listening, he was in full blown panic mode now, trying to convince me to stay.
"I know you think it's what's best, but you're in the middle of the school year, you can't ruin your education like that Bells, and you should focus on your exams. And is there really any point in moving now when you'll be moving again for college in a few months time? Please Bella, don't leave me now, I've only just got you back, I need you kid, I..."
"Dad, I'm staying here" I managed to say with slightly more volume, but it was still a weak attempt considering I knew what I could really do. Charlie's face went back down from red to its normal colour when he had registered what I'd said. Relief washed over his face, followed immediately by confusion. "So what is all this about then? You never make me breakfast". His curiosity sounded more like an accusation though, I wasn't used to Charlie questioning me about things, after that first week he had pretty much just left me to do what I wanted, probably afraid of starting the weeping again.

Charlie pushed the paper toward me innocently but I pushed it straight back to him. I couldn't cope with reading the paper; something in there might remind me of him. When Charlie looked at me with a worried expression I simply told him that I'd already read it, simple enough and he seemed to believe it. I got up then, going to pick up my bag, but Charlie grabbed me by the elbow and turned me round to face him. "Why don't you go out tonight? You haven't been out with your friends in months. Don't forget them Bella. What about the Webbers' girl, she's nice." I didn't really relish the thought of spending the evening with someone else, but I liked Angela and if it kept Charlie happy then surely it couldn't hurt.
"Ok dad, I'll sort something out at school, I'll leave you a note."

With that I turned and strode out of the door not wanting to be with other people but just sit alone in my ancient truck. I left Charlie with a triumphant look on his face. He clearly thought that I was starting to make an improvement; well if it pleased him then I wouldn't advise him otherwise. He deserved some happiness after all of the pain and suffering I had caused him over the last few months. I thought about that as I turned the key and my old Chevy pickup roared into life. Even that couldn't surprise me anymore, the thing that had made me jump every time I turned the key in the ignition.

I drove to school not really registering where I was going. Before I had chance to realise I was sat in my usual space in the parking lot with the key in my pocket. I was glad of the distraction, of the numbness that went with it, It was all I could hope for in my dull monotone life that had not hope of ever turning back to colour. The sun I had orbited around had burnt out, and my life had been left in darkness.

The morning's lessons flew past in another blur, of which this time I was not grateful, I knew what I had to do in the lunch hour and I had a feeling that it was going to be harder than I had anticipated. Anything to keep Charlie happy, I reminded myself as I shuffled nervously into the cafeteria.