Haha! I had to do this once I heard the song by Liam Lynch...its hilarious...
Hope you enjoy!
Author: Yo!
Audience: Yay!
Author: Um…Panda? Can you leave?
Panda :Kyuu?
Author: Yes…you're scaring Renji…
Renji: Im in my happy place…I'm in my happy place…
Panda: Kyuu!!! (flies away)
Author: (sigh)
(Now in cha-)
Author: Wait! I forgot to mention that now there's a new AIM with BLEACH…it is called… Bleach Radio!
Audience: (cheers)
(Now in…radio room?)
Author: Yay!
Ichigo: (looks around) Im out of there!
Byakuya: So…where's Rukia?
Ichigo: I don't know…
Renji: The panda's got her! They got her! (cries)
Author: Renji…the panda's are good!
Renji: No they're not! And I have a song to prove it!
(curtain closes an-)
Author: We're in a radio room!
(Renji grabs a guitar out of no-where)
Ichigo: Dude…get out of the recording studio!
Renji: I have to sing my song to the panda!
Ichigo: You can't sing! You're not a musician!
Renji: (clears throat)
Byakuya: Don't let him sing!
Renji: This next song, is the new…first song…off of my new album.
Ichigo: What?
Renji: It's not a rebel song…this is…the panda song
Byakuya: You've got to be kidding me!
Renji: (plays guitar) After dark…the pandas stalk, nightmare creatures with black hearts. Ravenous teeth that glow in dark, feasting on bums that live in the park…
Ichigo: (shakes head)
Renji: The panda's are coming! So hide under your bed! The panda's are coming! They're rip your ass to shreds!!!
Ichigo: Get out of the studio!
Byakuya: Yeah…get outta here dude!
Renji: I shant! The panda's be the most mysterious creatures!
Byakuya: Can someo-
Renji: Shrouded in their evil black and white coats!
Ichigo: What?
Renji: What kind of camouflage is this? Hiding in an Oreo factory could be…that's just another ominous chapter in the infamous panda…
Ichigo: (screams)
Renji: The panda's are coming! They're rip off your head! The panda's are coming! On a rampage of the dead!
Byakuya: What the hell?
Renji: The panda has million teeth…
Ichigo: Okay, cut off the oxygen in the other room!
Renji: Which it uses as a hacksaw to cut through bone, candy, and fences.
Byakuya: That's it…
Renji: The Chinese believe…that if you find a panda tooth…you have to power to summon Godzilla…
Ichigo: Really?
Renji: Im thick on panda mystery…The pandas are coming! So hide under your bed! The panda's are coming! They'll rip your ass to shreds! This has been chapter one in my ominous panda song book. I will cease at number eight hundred and twenty. You will see me again!
Byakuya: Just…uh…get a clue!
Renji: Just…get a panda!
(building shakes)
Author: What was that?
(building shakes again)
Renji: It's the panda!
Ichigo: No its no-
(Rukia is thrown through a window into the recording studio)
Author: Ahh!
Byakuya: My sister! NOOO!!
Renji: I told you so!
Ichigo: We need to get out of here!
(A panda comes through the window followed by others)
Everyone: (speechless)
Panda group: (Starts dancing) Fergalicious definition make them boys go loco. They want my treasure so they get their pleasures from my photo. You could see me, you can't squeeze me. I ain't easy, I ain't sleazy. I got reasons why I tease 'em. Boys just come and go like seasons. Fergalicious!
Renji: Ahh!
Ichigo: Oh my god!
Author: (jumps up and dances with them)
Byakuya: (stands there speechless)
Panda's and Author: So delicious (it's hot, hot) So delicious (I put them boys on rock, rock) So delicious (they wanna slice of what I got) I'm Fergalicious (t-t-t-t-t-tasty, tasty)
Ichigo: (grabs Author) No! You can't dance with them!!
Author: But…they're singing!
Ichigo: Well…then you sing!
Renji: Wait! I got a better plan to catch this big red lobster man!
Ichigo: No Nightmare before Christmas songs…
Renji: Why not call the Repair man?
(Hitsugaya busts through the door)
Hitsugaya: Did somebody say the repair man?
Ichigo: (sighs) Toshiro…stop.
Hitsugaya: Im not Toshiro…I'm the repair man-man-man-man-man-man-man!
Ichigo: (grabs him too) Then lets go!
(Everyone runs away except Byakuya)
Byakuya: Wait…where is everyone?
Panda's: God! (grabs Byakuya)
Byakuya: Ahh!
(in another room)
Ichigo: (holding everyone behind a desk) I think we've lost them…
Author: (cries)
Ichigo: What's wrong?
Author: I loved them!
Renji: Begone evil doers!
Ichigo: (sighs) Can we end this chapter already?
Author: I can't since we're in the radio station…it messes up the force.
Ichigo: Great…
Narrator: Can they escape from the evil of the pandas? Is there actually a tooth that brings Godzilla to life? And what will happen of Byakuya? All this is the next chapter!
Lol...I know its wrong.
How come Ichigo always ends up the hero?